TSL QB Power Rankings


“Now stop. Take a breath. Again, realize this is ALL FOR FUN. Some of you just read this and are gnashing your teeth I didn't give you enough "props" in this piece. A handful of you "get" it and will joke with me about this when you see me Saturday. Others of you will play it off, but keep it in the back of your mind all season and throw any win by your team and a loss by another in my face as though I care about anything other than having fun.” – Rameer AKA “THE BUILD”


Ahh, Rameer.  So wise.  Instead of focusing on why we’re really here (Football + Booze = Good Times For All) the TSL Universe often chooses to get bent out of shape about the perceived lack of respect they and their teams get from the League.  Can you imagine a world where we all just showed up to play our games, had some drinks at the bar, and didn’t worry about what the League website said about how great we are, or how much we suck?


Yeah, you’re right.  That DOES sound boring.


So here’s another weekly article to make you all feel underappreciated - Introducing the TSL QB Power Rankings!!!  Because TSL loves to court controversy, we’re going to publish a weekly Quarterback Power Ranking throughout the season.  League leaders and rising stars will be acknowledged… as will QBs who throw four picks in a game and blow it for their teams. 


Sounds fun, right?  You have questions.  Okay, shoot:


“Are you going to show rankings for all 46 starting QB’s every week?”

No, just the Top Ten will be shown every week, but the write-up will have commentary on other rising and falling QBs throughout the League as well.


“Is this going to be heavily biased towards the Competitive divisions?”

The top ten probably will be, sure.  But we will absolutely be acknowledging the performance (good and bad) of Quarterbacks in the Rec divisions as well.  I doubt a Rec 4 quarterback will ever crack the Top Ten, but all divisions will be covered in the write-up, every week.


“So you’re only ranking QB’s… what about the rest of us?”

We didn’t forget about the rest of you.  So your arm is too weak and your teammates don’t trust you with the most important position in the game.  Don’t worry – we’ll also rank other positions from time to time as well.  Top Non-QB Males in the League, Top Females, Top Rec 2 Players, etc.  We can rank whatever we want.  Best Teammate, Best Drinker, Best Division, Best Referee, Best Looking… Ranking anything is always fun.  Unless we rank you last, of course.


“You keep saying ‘we’.  Who is writing this?  Who determines these rankings?”

The Western New York Touch Football Writers Assoc… no, wait, that’s some other league.  Don’t worry about who’s writing this.  Let’s be honest: If you knew, you would incessantly whine to that person or persons about why you or your QB should be ranked higher every week.  Anonymity is key.


So that’s the plan.  We debated doing a Pre-Season rankings to start the season, but that would be based off of last year’s performances, and the past means nothing to us.  This is a “what have you done for me lately” league, and no one cares that Topper won a D3 title anymore… all that matters is how Topper does in his new division (spoiler alert: he will do badly).  So the first rankings will be released after the first games of the season have taken place.


We started by quoting “The Rant”, so let’s close by ripping off “The Sentinel” with a poem of our own:


Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

If you’re so great at QB,

Why are you ranked 42?