- Details
- Written by Jeff Krol
- Category: TSL QB Power Rankings
- Published: 10 June 2025
- Created: 10 June 2025
- Hits: 715
Welcome back to the TSL Quarterback Power Rankings!
We have 25 QBs this week, we have some stats (of course), and we have the ALL-TSL DEFENSIVE RANKINGS below. Enjoy!
#1 Joey Batts - Legends / Cunning Stunts
Last Week: Beat 716 58-35, beat PWI 37-26 (Stunts)
Legends finished the regular season (Crossover game aside) as the #1 seed and scored the most points per game of any team in D1 (by about a TD per game)… and Cunning Stunts are tied with Wanderers as the third highest scoring team in the whole TSL. It’s closer than it looks between #1 and #2 in the Power Rankings (Legends still have better skill players than Eyes Downtown, which is a vote in Bobby’s favor) but Joey has to finish the season #1 with all he’s accomplished with BOTH teams.
#2 Bobby McConnell - Eyes Downtown
Last Week: Beat What a Dump 18-13
When was the last time Eyes Downtown were held to only 18 points?? It’s almost like the What A Dump defense knew all of Bobby’s tricks… and yet it still wasn’t enough to get them a W, as Eyes Downtown prevailed on the strength of great defense last week. They still have a CHANCE to get the #1 seed in D1 if Legends loses to Can’t Touch This on Saturday (more on that in a second) but either way, a first round bye with an all-new roster is no small accomplishment.
#3 Ryan Dougherty - Can't Touch This
Last Week: Beat the Malones 28-26
Can’t Touch This survived the Malones to finish their regular season undefeated. Are they unbeatable in the playoffs? No, of course not. The Malones clearly plays them very well (see last season’s playoff elimination) and Mavericks COULD have a good day and sneak one out (although they DON’T seem to play CTT very well). But anyone who “predicts” a D2 winner other than Can’t Touch This this season must be a pretty desperate gambler. Ryan jumps into the top three for the first time in his TSL career.
#4 Garrett Beesing - Frodo Swaggins
Last Week: Beat Sticky Bandits 37-30
Frodo Swaggins finished the regular season with more points scored than the Sticky Bandits, and a head to head win at the end as well. Good enough for Garrett to jump over Mike in the Power Rankings. The gap between #3, #4 and #5 is so close this season (Joey and Bobby have run away with #1 and #2) – is this the season we see Frodo advance to its first ever D1 Finals? Stay tuned for our playoff preview next week…
#5 Mike Thomas – Sticky Bandits
Last Week: Lost to Frodo Swaggins 37-30
The Sticky Bandits finish their D1 portion of the schedule 3-4 and fifth in scoring within their division. This is the team that has been to the last two D1 Finals? They’re either a step off this Spring, or they’re holding something back for playoffs. At least they have the confidence to know that they’ve pulled this off before (with almost the exact same roster) so we doubt they’re too worried about it yet.
#6 Frank Laudico - Wanderers
Last Week: Beat Practice Squad 35-26
Up until Joey Batts did it TWICE last season, the TSL hadn’t had an undefeated team in literally years. Now with a week of regular season left, the Wanderers are one of four remaining teams that still have a zero in the “losses” column of the standings. 716 has plummeted to 7th in the division so our guess is Wanderers finish undefeated on Saturday, then easily crush whatever team gets through the play-in round the next week. But there ARE teams that can beat them (Practice Squad only last by 9!) so the semis and finals should be an interesting test for the TSL’s most famous tie dye team.
#7 Jordan Lawson – Freeballers / Mavericks
Last Week: Lost to What A Dump 49-39 (Freeballers), Beat Jabronies 37-15, beat Scared Hitless 44-16 (Mavericks)
Freeballers will finish the regular season without a “real” win (upcoming Show Me Your TDs Crossover massacre aside) but their offense scored about as many points as the rest of the division (at least the Non-Legends, non-Eyes Downtown part of their division). If they played any kind of defense at all, they might be a .500 team. And Mavericks finished their D2 season undefeated… except for in games against Can’t Touch This, who absolutely outclassed them twice. One of these two teams COULD be celebrating their champagne bath in a couple weeks… but it’s probably not Freeballers.
#8 Cody Stumpf – What a Dump
Last Week: Lost to Eyes Downtown 18-13, beat Freeballers 49-39
This was the grudge match that What A Dump HAD to have been waiting for all season. It was close, and they had a shot, and their defense is probably incredibly proud to have held Bobby to so few points… but a loss is a loss, and What A Dump finishes their D1 schedule winless against teams not named Freeballers. Are we surprised? A little. There’s a ton of talent on this team, so we thought they’d be closer to .500. But QBing isn’t easy (which is why so few people ever crack our Top Ten here!) and Cody will only improve in time.
#9 Andy Strug – The Malones
Last Week: Lost to Can’t Touch This 28-26
The Malones are 0-2 in the last two weeks, but they’ve lost to the top two seeds in D2 by one point and two points… the latter of which is especially impressive, considering no one’s been within 27 points of CTT all season. These guys aren’t the “Favorite” to win their division… but is there a team that the favorites are more scared to play against than the Malones right now?? If you’re looking for a team to play spoiler and ruin an undefeated season, Malones are the ones to bet on.
#10 Buddy Lee – Passing While Intoxicated / Interdimensional Lightning Falcons
Last Week: Lost to Cunning Stunts 37-26, beat Becca Gets Reccked 48-37 (Passing While Intoxicated)
Buddy is QBing for the 7th and 8th highest scoring teams in the TSL right now, so he must be pretty good at this. We’ve been saying all season that Wanderers and PWI are destined to meet in the D3 championship game, but PWI are now in fourth place. Are they really a worse team that Cunning Stunts and Practice Squad? Maybe. Even if PWI chokes in the semifinals, or loses to Wanderers in the Finals (which won’t be considered “choking” since they’re so good), Buddy seems likely to celebrate at least a D4 championship win.
#11 Brandon “B” Ford – Practice Squad / Tater Tots
Last Week: Lost to Wanderers 35-26 (Practice Squad), lost to Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 62-24 (Tater Tots)
The schedule makers didn’t do B any favors this week, giving him a Lenny & Rameer Day present of the top two seeds in BOTH of his divisions. The Practice Squad game must have been encouraging. Losing by only 9 shows they can hang with the best of them. The Tots game must have been depressing. Tough to feel like a contender when you’re down by 38 against a backup QB.
#12 Joe Miano - Jabronies
Last Week: Lost to Mavericks 37-15
Throw out their two wins against Scared Hitless this season, and the Jabronies have scored 7, 26, 22 and 15 points on offense in their other four games. There’s real talent on this team, but it’s tough to imagine them ripping off three playoff W’s in a row against the top teams, when two of them are AVERAGING over 40+ PPG.
#13 Dylan Day - Scared Hitless
Last Week: Lost to Mavericks 44-16
Remember when Scared Hitless beat the Malones 43-34?? We thought that might end up being a turning point in their season, but now it looks like just a fluke. Other than their 90-0 destruction of Show Me Your TDs, a forfeit loss to Can’t Touch This, and the aforementioned Malones upset, and they’ve lost their OTHER four games by 32, 30, 7 and 28 points. Which version of this team do we expect to show up for the playoffs?
#14 Dylan Jaloza – Bullet Club
Last Week: Beat D-Generation X Y and Z 31-24
The next several QBs are all in the “trying to win this week to avoid the D3 play-in games” category. Bullet Club are two points behind Buffalo Vice with 716 ahead of them as well, but Bullet Club have the advantage of playing GirthQuakes this week while the teams they need to pass in the standings face Wanderers and PWI. Don’t count out Dylan’s chances this week.
#15 Andy Clark – Buffalo Vice
Last Week: Beat GirthQuakes 27-6
Buffalo Vice and Becca Gets Reccked are tied in record, and EXACTLY tied in point differential in the standings, which is pretty cool. Of course every team in D3 plays all but one other team over the course of the season, and naturally Vice and Becca didn’t/don’t play each other, so we have no way of knowing which team is actually “better”. We’re giving Andy the benefit of the doubt here because he has Buchlis beat in one category: attendance.
#16 Alex Buchlis – Becca Gets Reccked
Last Week: Did Not Play
No Buchlis at the fields this week, and Becca Gets Reccked went 0-1-1 in his absence.
#17 Derek Pew - 716
Last Week: Did Not Play
Was Derek here this week? Does he still play for 716? We haven’t seen this guy in ages.
#18 Kyle Conniff – PowerPuff Girls
Last Week: Beat Two Tuddies 44-10
Remember when we were deciding which of the three undefeated teams would win D5? PowerPuff has beaten Tuddies and the McMuffins by a combined 105-24 in the past two weeks. This team. This team is the one that will win D5. Gun to your head, if you had to pick a winner between PowerPuff Girls and the top teams in D4 (ILF, Mike’s Detailing, Bird Watching in my Birkenstocks)… you’d pick PowerPuff Girls to win, right?
#19 Damien Keller – D-Generation X Y and Z
Last Week: Lost to Bullet Club 31-24
D-Generation X Y and Z won their first game of the season by a single point. Since then they’re 0-5-1 and not looking like the contenders we thought they would be. Do you remember what their record was last season, with more or less the same roster? They were 7-2, and finished the regular season in second place. Seems like everything that went right last season, is going wrong this season.
#20 Mark Dalfonso – Mike’s Detailing
Last Week: Beat Vaspian 37-16
Mike’s Detailing and Bird Watching in my Birkenstocks have established themselves as the clear #2 and #3 teams in D4 (in some order). They have the same record, and the exact same point differential per game, once we throw out a Cobblestone forfeit. We’re giving Mark a SLIGHT edge in the Power Rankings, because our guess is you couldn’t name more than one receiver on his roster.
#21 David Eickhoff – Bird Watching in my Birkenstocks
Last Week: Beat Vaspian 24-22
See: Mark Dalfonso, above. What are the odds these two teams meet in the Semifinals? At least 80%, right?
#22 Eric Mueller - Puckett
Last Week: Beat Come From Behind 32-30
There may be a clear top three in Division 4 this season, but it’s also pretty clear who the next team up is. Puckett finished their regular season on Saturday with a winning record, and they COULD still finish with the same record as the two teams above them (although tie breakers won’t be kind to Puckett). If anyone knows about coasting in the regular season just to up their game in the playoffs, it’s THREE TIME D4 CHAMPIONS Puckett!
#23 Matt Kieta - GirthQuakes
Last Week: Lost to Buffalo Vice 27-6
GirthQuakes beat CUNNING FREAKIN’ STUNTS by two points earlier this season, and it felt like the coming out party of a great new team. It turns out that has been their ONLY win this season, as they’ve since slid to a 1-6 record with the worst offensive production in the division at 21.0 PPG. Do we see this team winning their play-in game in a couple weeks? It’s… not impossible. Do we see them winning a game one hour later against the Wanderers, who beat them 50-8 earlier this season? Now that IS impossible!
#24 Paul LoVullo – Come From Behind
Last Week: Lost to Puckett 32-30
Going up a division can be a real bitch. Suddenly instead of the best team in your division, you’re usually one of the worst, and that’s a difficult mental adjustment for most teams. Come From Behind have actually done really well with it this session though. If they’d scored 3 more points on Saturday they would be looking at a winning record in their first season in D4, and they still have a great shot at .500 this weekend with a win against 1-6 Vaspian. Next season (when ILF is gone) we expect CFB to be among the leaders again.
#25 Mike Wolcott – Two Tuddies
Last Week: Lost to PowerPuff Girls 44-10
Everyone loses to PowerPuff Girls. There’s really no shame in that. We doubt Tuddies wanted to get crushed by 34 points though. They’re great athletes, of course, but you’re telling us that shirtless Chris couldn’t catch a couple jump ball TDs over a girl half his height? Tuddies will be fine, and we still think we’ll see them in the D5 Finals game… but the final result will probably be similar to what we saw on Saturday.
Fancy Statistics Section
QB Rankings are too often about scoring points. What about defense??? Doesn’t defense win championships? (They SAY that, but in our experience in this League it’s usually great offenses that are in the Championship games)
Maybe they’ll win a championship. Maybe they won’t. But here are the top defenses in the league, by division:
Teams allowing under 20 PPG: Can't Touch This, PowerPuff Girls, Balls Deep, Blitzkrieg, TMA
Teams allowing over 40 PPG: Show Me Your TDs, Cobblestone
Teams allowing over 50 PPG: Show Me Your TDs
Teams allowing over 60 PPG: Show Me Your TDs
Teams allowing over 70 PPG: Show Me Your TDs
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That's it for the TSL Power Rankings this week! If you have any thoughts about QB rankings, or you want to make sure we know who's throwing for your team, please feel free to contact our good friend This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. You tell him, he'll tell us.
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