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And so it begins…….again.

There are those that will tell you it was a good ride while it lasted. They will say social co-ed football had it’s place but just like everything else in life nothing lasts forever. The game has changed. It isn’t like it used to be. It used to be about playing your hearts out on the field and partying like rock stars off it. Is it like that anymore? I wonder sometimes. These kids today don’t seem to get it. They feel it necessary to stack their teams instead of practicing to get better with who they have. They get to football sometimes and leave right after.  So where do we go from here? Has this great game of ours jumped the shark? I am not so sure. It is not time yet to call it a career and go softly into that good night. There are still chapters left to be written in this book. Topper Sports League is was and will always be the measuring stick for how it is supposed to be done. You can quote me on that. The time for talk is almost over. As I say every year it is almost time to sit back and enjoy the ride. Out of the ashes new stars will emerge. Just when you think you have seen it all we will once again see something we didn’t think possible. 46 teams head to the starting line with hopes and aspiration of social co-ed immortality. Oh yeah I forgot we decided to stop the sub BS. Thanks for your opinions as we did talk to people in the offseason but we are going to try something new this year. We aren’t going to let you stack your team anymore. You will need to bring a team to the fields or you won’t win. The sub rules are changing with the times. If you hoist the trophy at the end this go round you will most definitely have to earn it. You will need to hone your craft and flat out bring it if you want to win it all.

Before you take the field of battle this week I would tell you to try your best, respect others and yourself. Play your best and have a good time. This league is fun so enjoy it and don’t take things so seriously. What happens after that well……your guess is as good as mine

And if after all that time you don’t win the title and you are sad, don’t worry there will always be “hope” Topper’s Wheel of Hope actually…..But we will get into that a little later in this article.

D1

TIGHT ENDS IN MOTION +7 VS EYES DOWNTOWN:  Oh it is double dog on in this one. TEIM has re-tooled as they have a new face or two. ED are the defending champ as not much has changed. This game will be simple for each. For TEIM to have a chance they must get right up in the faces of the ED WR’S and force Bobby to make the perfect throw. For ED they might be better to sit back in a short zone and force TEIM to beat them over the top which is something TEIM struggles to do. TEIM looked right at home in D1 last session now is the time to see if they are poised to take the next step. If they want to know where they stand this is the game they will find out. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 6

RACKS AND SACKS VS #XTC +6: I am hearing rumors a new face or two will be in the RAS lineup this week. I am also hearing a blast from the past will be at QB. #XTC had ED on the ropes and let them off the hook in last season’s playoff.  I still can not believe #XTC had a full squad and played a shorthanded ED and decided in their infinite wisdom not to man them up and run them off the field. I really hope the rumors are true and Margo is poised to make her triumphant return as this team could use a shot in the arm. I have no clue who will or will not be in the #XTC lineup this week I am sure they don’t know either.  RACKS AND SACKS BY 4

HOOTIE AND THE BROFISH +3 VS PUBLIC ENEMY: HATBF is the next team to be pulled up into   the show. They just dismantled D2 last year and now they go heads up with one of D1’s finest. They are catching PE at a perfect time. HATBF is all over the summer football circuit while PE takes the summer off. I am very interested to see how HATBF matches up. They have a girl who is about to become a household name in this league. Bro is a very smart very under rated QB who continues to get better and better. This game will be decided by the 2’s and the 3’s. HATBF will score some points but can their 2^nd and 3^rd options get open and more importantly cover the 2^nd and 3^rd options of PE this week. PUBLIC ENEMY BY 1

MARKETING MAYORS VS ANGRY BUFFALO +4: D1 is a hot bed of awesome match ups this week. AB has re-tooled and should be a dangerous team this year. They already had the elite level QB now they have all kinds of speed to go with him. MM are a solid team but you could see that they were not going to win last session without Delecki. I am very curious to see who they bring with them this season and I am also very curious to see how long it takes AB to gel. AB has speed to burn now to already go with their rocket armed           QB and size edge. One can only wonder if Shari makes her debut this week. As of the time of the writing I am still not sure who she is playing with or even playing at all. AB is totally improved but did they fix the glaring issues they had the female spots last session? MARKETING MAYORS BY 4

D2

It doesn’t exist. Just pretend that you never read this. You are having a dream. There is nothing to see here……

D3

UNCLE RICO’S TIME TRAVELERS +7 VS 1 UNCLE TOPPER TOO MANY: Yes we are about to have the battle of the uncle’s. Team Topper is reeling after Boo Drew totally forsake them for an Allanis Morisette tattoo last playoff. Yeah isn’t that ironic? Don’t you think? I mean it’s like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife. As for the game who gives a crap its opening day people let’s enjoy if for what it is. The good news for Team Topper is Uncle Topper does not generally rear his ugly head until about 2:45 eastern time and this game is at 10am so regular Topper should be OK for this one. As for the game I am rolling with the cagey vet… Todd Nixon=Ratings!!!! 1 UNCLE TOPPER TOO MANY BY 8

SLYTHERIN THAT END ZONE +56 VS GRYFFINDOR: Well the good news is Joey Batts is about to make his glorious return. Jeremy Burr has been signed and that means bad news for SITE. How funny will it be when SITE puts all 4 of their guys on Burr and Joey Batts still completes the pass to him? Tony will be all alone on the other side of the formation with no one covering him but Joey will still not throw him the ball. The Gryff is primed for a huge year people. Let us all sit back and enjoy the ride as Joey Batts gets one step closer to yet another TSL League MVP award. GRYFFINDOR BY 100

BULLETT CLUB VS A&A +7: Time to tune the band back up for the Matty Ice Gordy K Freedom Festival Part Two. Sometimes your fate is determined in the offseason. One team signed Garrett Beesing and the other signed JZ. I will let you decide which team we are going with this week. A&A is a solid football team but you truly never know who will show up. I said this last session and will say it again this session Jeff Easton is poised for a break out season and this could be it. BULLETT CLUB BY 6

DMX VS STICKY BANDITS +6: I will have a watchful eye on the Sticky Nation this season. Due to un-fathomable league politics Dave Baker will not be in this week’s line up.  Alex will be in this week’s line up and that’s a god thing. DMX is a tweener team. They were just a click too bad for D2 but could they be a click too good for D3? Is Ricky Reckio poised to return and claim his best Ricky award? With Baker gone Reckio will need to step up this season. If you like offense this is the game for you as both teams can light it up. DMX BY 4

D4

ULTIMATE WARRIORS +6 VS STEVES CUZ’INS: I have no clue who UW are so I will make sure to get a good look a them this week. Cousin Steve is a man among men. He is easily the best Kensey player in history as he is the only Kensey player left playing in history. Cousin Steve will bring hell fire and brimstone with him. I suspect Cousin Steve and Co will be read to send D4 a message this week. STEVES CUZ’INS BY 1

NO PUNT INTENDED VS STEVE’S CUZ’INS +4: This one could be interesting. NPI has a very soid female stable and they do have some speed that will needed to be accounted for. Can NPI figure out a defense to stop one of the greatest QB’s in social co-ed football history? I am not so sure either. Could NPI already be looking ahead to 3AS later in the season? Both squads have stars on both sides of the ball this one should be good. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 3

NO PUNT INTENDED VS BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS +7: Like 3AS NPI was shocked early in last season playoffs. They are a solid team that has very solid females. They tend to lapse here and there and that causes them problems. I wonder what will happen to NPI now that Kyle Coniff can not play WR or defense for them. BSS is what their record says they are. They can surprise people. They are now the cagey vets that will show each and every week. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 8

HK7 +7 VS PUCKETT ALL STARS: I was a little disappointed to hear PAS were heading to D4. They did just fine for their first season in D3. They looked like they could hang but here they are. HK7 has a very under rated QB and one of the division better females. What they do not have is a supporting cast that is loaded top to bottom. PAS have a very smart very sure armed QB who can make plays. I suspect PAS will be a bit too much for HK7 to handle. PUCKETT ALL STARS BY 10

3^RD AND SCHLONG +3 VS CINTAS: Can one football field hold the star power of Joey Batts and Katie friggin Keller? Never has a female and male with such star power shared a TSL field of battle. Cintas had a ho hum season in D3 last year and are moving on down. 3AS was the team to beat last season before they were shocked. Some say they weren’t ready to play while I maintain their star female was caught in her own love triangle of sorts which caused a catastrophic shift of epic proportions. I am very interested to see if 3AS comes out of the gate flying or will they not recover from last season’s shock of the century.  3^RD AND SCHLONG BY 1

D5

UFO +8 VS HUNG BUFFALO: This one should be interesting as each team has been known to “lose their kool” from time to time. Both teams are solid on both sides of the ball. UFO hung tough in D5 last season and will look to take the next step. HB usually are notorious slow starters so this one could be interesting. HB have very solid females and a big size advantage they will look to use to their advantage. You never truly know what can and will happen on opening day. HUNG BUFFALO BY 7

HOPE N RUIN VS VANDALY INDUSTRIES +3: HNR shocked the world and this writer when they were the ones left standing with the D5 trophy. How did they shock the world? What do they do for an encore? VI started out guns a blazing but then they just fizzled down the stretch. VI will need more if they want to win in D5. They obviously lack speed but they have size and they have intelligence. HNR will not sneak up on anyone this session as teams will be gunning for them. HOPE N RUIN BY 4

ACE +4 VS ALL WE DO IS QUINN: Oh this one should be goooood. Ronny F’N K is back and that’s good for business. I am shocked we are like 36 hours from opening day and Blasé LaDuca has not told us on face book how great he is nor called his shot that he will be your D5 MVP. AWDIQ was supposed to win the D5 title but HNR will haunt them forever. HNR is AWDIQ’s kryptonite they are their new bitter rival. ACE will bring the fight literally but do they have the speed to keep up with the young guns in purple? This game should be good. AWDIQ by 3

MATTY’S ANGELS VS WITTERS +4: MA has to be shaking their heads right now. They were in a solid position to win last season title but came up short. That was then and this is now. First up is a Witter’s team that stated slow but got better and better as the season progressed. MA will look to take their sand lot style to Witter’s this week. I suspect Witter’s will play textbook so we should have a decent battle. The key to beating the Angels is getting pressure and using and size advantage they may have on offense to their advantage. MATTY’S ANGELS BY 6

COME FROM BEHIND VS CUNNING STUNTS +6: I was shocked CS got as far as they did but should I be? I mean let’s be honest Joey Battaglia is such a great player he makes each and every person around him better. Matter of fact I feel like I am a better person right now just for writing about him. CS went on a magical ride. I really hope Drew isn’t even on their sub roster. That experiment did not work. CFB is a battle tested team that can win in this league. They have size speed and they have smarts. CS will combat them with short quick throws from a man who could be this league’s best player. I was very impressed with the play of both Clarke sisters down the stretch. This game should be a good one this week. COME FROM BEHIND BY 7

D6

JABRONIES VS PEACHY PLATOON +4: PP is a newby which usually means 1 of 2 things. Either they will be really good and run Jabronies off the field or they will be really bad and they will get run off the field. Mine as well grab a coin and just flip it. Jabronies had a very roller coaster type season. They had highs and lows and they were one play away from a D6 playoff berth. I have no clue what PP brings to the table but the team they are facing got better and better week after week. This should be a very good first test. JABRONIES BY 6

THE MCKENIZE AGENCY +3 VS THE PRACTICE SQUAD: I am hearing TMA made a very quiet but very solid signing in the off season as they have now have a very under rated WR in their midst. They will need him at TPS is a very solid team. TMA checks all the boxes. They are the people’s champions and we want them to win it all as they would blow the roof off the joint if they hoisted the D6 trophy at this season banquet. TPS continue to watch and wait. They continue to get better and better. Their time might be now. Yes the world wants a TMA victory tour but TPS might be thinking otherwise….THE PRACTICE SQUAD BY 4

PASSLESS CHAPS +4 VS CELINO SEWER RATS: CSR is a very solid football team. PC did not look very good in their maiden season but let’s see if they learned anything. PC has some skill but they now need to learn each and every week and continue to take baby steps. CSR is a very solid team top to bottom. They have been there and done that. PC did not look very good in last season’s D5 but they might settle in just fine in D6. Time will tell.  CELINO SEWER RATS BY 4

-Just so we all are clear on sub procedures moving forward:

******NEW POLICY*****

Each and every team has until Friday morning at 10am to email sublist @toppersports.com. We will promptly respond via email to your request. You must follow all sub rules as per the rule book. PLEASE NOTE all teams are allowed 4 sub games only. Once you use up your “4 games” you can only use a USL sub only NO EXCEPTIONS. This rule extends into playoffs. Use your sub requests wisely.

5 Questions for Saturday

1. Will they or won’t they? I know season after season I look up into the heaven’s above and I say the same darn thing. I first thank the good Lord for bestowing Joey Batts and all his greatness upon each and every one of us. The second thing I do is clench my fist and go “WHY GOD WHY??” We all know 40 year plan guy and Katie Keller can have the marriage and love affair of the century but nooooooo Katie Keller just won’t give in to her demons and make this thing official.  Ladies and Gentlemen I implore each and every one of you to just walk up to Katie Keller and 40 year plan guy and tell them both to quit fooling themselves and just finally give into their feelings…..

2. Will they or won’t they? I am not one to talk so you didn’t hear this from me but I am hearing rumors Shari will be returning and this my friends is the segway to perhaps the greatest battle nay fight of the century. We all know it is the destiny of both Emily and Shari to finally get into some ring like structure and fight for the balance of power in the TSL universe. We have to know, we just must know who will win this battle the alpha blonde or the alpha brunette?

3.  So who exactly does Joey Batts love more Jeremy Burr or his brother Tony? I for one am happy to see the Burrman with Joey Batts once and for all. Burr and Batts could be the greatest heel tag team in history. I for one still can’t help but think Brother Tony must be hurt again. Last year was no fun for Tony. He didn’t win, he lost to Joey, he didn’t find 10 new friends and by all accounts most people say he has gone MIA. If his brother loves Burr more than Tony he might not recover…

4. What was Darryl Carr QB Superstar thinking? I hear they lost Garrett Beesing aka “Jimmy Breuer” in the off season. Why would the #Icon keep Cobblestone in D3? Does Darryl know something we don’t? Is he debuting a new super team? I mean Darryl Carr QB Superstar is good enough to win games all by himself as he easily is our best player but what does he have up his sleeve?

5. Will Hootie and the Brofish make an easy D1 transition like TEIM did last session or will they struggle? I know their QB is solid and I know they have a female that is game changer but can their 2’s and their 3’s hold? I am very interested to see how they fare the first 3-4 weeks of this season.

10 Final Thoughts for Saturday

1. The game I have my eye on this week is in D1 where Eyes Downtown and Tight Ends in Motion have at it. TEIM will get alot of answers to their questions this week. I am sure they are wondering if they have what it takes to take the next step. Will Coniff be an improvement over Kleckler? Did the potted plant stay or did Eric take it to Hootie? ED is a great first test for TEIM. You know what I am going to say next so here goes…..this game will be decided at QB.

2. I for one a can not tell you how happy I was to find out that the field general Ronny K is about to make his glorious return as ACE will be returning. I also can not wait for the TSL re-match of the century later this year when ACE and Matty’s Angels have at it again. I am so fighting for flex scheduling as this game must be on field #1 as it should be bedlam.

3. I am very curious to see how The McKenzie Agency fares this week with the D6 favorite  Practice Squad. TPS has been awesome for the past few seasons and their time could finally be now. TMA is a solid team top to bottom as they got a very nice new toy in the off season on offense.

4. It was nice of Uncle Rico to take the ride up to D3 this session. They have a solid first test waiting for them as Uncle Topper and Co will be ready to go. I do not think URTT has seen an athlete of Drew’s caliber down in D4. I wonder if Drew just read that and really thinks I think he’s good or if he thinks I have started to plant a seed and I am just F’N with him. URTT will need to keep a watchful eye on the ladies of 1TTM this week as they can flat out go. 

5. I am very curious to see how long it will take Angry Buffalo to gel and get things moving in the right direction. The schedule maker did them no favors giving them Marketing Mayors this week. BTW they can say what they want about last season and the QB play but Nick Sooch can flat out make it rain so if AB has offensive issues this time I can assure you it won’t be on the QB.

6. I know he is not playing this week but I am so cheering for Gordon as I so hope the Bi Polar Express works out. Gordon is a very under rated player and mind in this game. I have to be honest a small piece of me wants him to just lose it one week as it would really be kinda funny if he went bi polar on a girl in a D6 game. I think gender teams are a great thing so I hope BPE has a fine season.

7. I am very curious to see what we get this week in D4 with Steve’s Cuz’ins. I am hearing this team has a decent roster with good guys and girls. They have 2 games this week so we will get to see what they are made of.  

8. I am hearing Travis was none too happy with his squad lasts session and made some changes. Radon was a solid player so Travis better make sure his changes work or people will begin to put him under the microscope. RAS are a decent team that are at a crossroads this session.

9. DMX did right by TSL and stayed in D2 last session now they are down in the new D3 where they have a good a chance as anyone to hoist the trophy. It won’t be easy as Griffyndor and Bullet Club will be looming. I still think David “D Dub” Wilborn has “next big thing potential” as I would keep an eye on Morning Wood. You could make the case for anyone of like 6 teams in this division.

10.  I just got to thinking, normal people are all excited to start the season as they have hope of a solid season, but what is Gary thinking? Is he all like OMG why the F are we in D3? Are we going to go like 1-8 again? Why didn’t I just stay with JZ? And seriously who named them Slytherin the end Zone? I really need to know as that person should be fired.

*****Once again please join us at 2:00 for the first ever Topper’s Wheel of Hope wheel spin. Thanks to Angry Buffalo at the Rose Garden and Topper Sports for giving away a $100 Angry Buffalo gift certificate each week. Please note: you must be in the bar the time of the drawing to win. If it hits your team and you are not there we will spin again until there is a winner******

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