CHAMPIONSHIP THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 17 October 2025 19:03

Published: Friday, 17 October 2025 19:03

Written by Jeff Krol

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Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, the day that you all have been waiting for is finally here: Championship Saturday. On Saturday, October 18th in the Year of Our Lord 2025, the 24 TSL football franchises that survived Playoff Saturday will descend upon the Leonard T. Alba III Fields at the Rose Garden to finish what they started back in August: Winning the Race for Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality. 

How you’ve ended up here simply doesn’t matter anymore. All that matters is that you’re here, and you have a chance (or two!) at earning Immortality and putting your name down in history forever. Only six of these teams will meet their goal. The other 18 will once again have to wait until the Spring for their next chance at it, as they painstakingly go over every dropped pass, every overthrow, or every time they got burned on a route OR that time that if they were a split second earlier, they could’ve made a big play. Some of you will talk about it in therapy for weeks, maybe months. Maybe forever. From 10:00am until 5:00pm, every play a TSL player makes (or doesn’t make) will change the trajectory of TSL history. You better be at the top of your game. You better be prepared. 

 

And as for the 25 TSL franchises that met their end last week, we thank you for your service. We know you gave it your all (unless you were the Freeballers or Come From Behind, who forfeit like cowards before the games even played, OR apparently Sticky Laces, who WON their first round game, and THEN forfeited so they didn’t have to play The Chargers, who I guess showed up to the fields for no reason? That’s extremely weak, for the record.) and while you’re licking your wounds this offseason just remember: There’s always next year. 

 

We are merely a short time away from discovering just who the six greatest Social Co-Ed Touch Football teams in the world are. The pressure is mounting, and the excitement is building. There is NOTHING quite like Championship Saturday in the TSL. Who are going to be the ones that spray the champagne? 

 

Playoff Saturday brought us its usual chaos, as was to be expected. Like I said, we had three forfeits, teams going for two and winning at the end of the game (DXYZ), teams going for two to win and losing (Cobblestone), we had our customary upsets (#7 Mavericks winning in overtime, #6 Pit Harade taking down BQUIT), we had ejections, we had teams combine for 100 points (ILF 60 - Vice 40), we had teams get shutout (Four Tuddies), we had top contenders barely escape (Flying Balls 30, Select 29), and we had old favorites reemerge (Can’t Touch This 47, Scared Hitless 26), and of course we had D6 having to apparently play in a monsoon? We had a bit of everything, which is why Playoff Saturday is one of the best sports days of the year. 

 

Championship Saturday will have its own chaos of course, but the stakes are much higher and the buttholes are more tightly clenched. We won’t see every division go chalk, and the mystery of what #1 seeds will lose is always exciting. What unexpected team will rise up and take the title? 

 

Well, what’s what I’m here to tell you. And, as usual, I’ve reached out to the TSLQBPRC to see if any of those slackers on the committee can give us a “second opinion” on some of these games and see what their version of how things will play out will be. 

 

Let’s get to it! 

 

GF: Before we get into the game predictions TSLQBPRC person(s?), is there anything else you’d like to specifically add about Playoff Saturday? 

 

TSLQBPR: Just that there’s no shame in losing.  Sounds like a soft statement, we know, but there are only 6 champions this session and that means 43 teams are going to end their seasons without a champagne bath.  If you’re eliminated already, don’t worry - it just means you’re in good company!

 

D1

 

Last Week’s Games

#1 Legends 21, #8 Freeballers 0 (Forfeit)

#7 Mavericks 42, #2 Eyes Downtown 33 (OT)

#3 Sticky Bandits 46, #6 Unit Ha Ha 33

#4 What A Dump 28, #5 Frodo Swaggins 8

 

The Freeballers decided that the only way to not lose to the Legends by 50 was to not play at all, The Mavericks pull of the biggest upset of the day, beating Eyes Downtown in overtime, Sticky Bandits handle Ha Ha, and Frodo Swaggins forgets to show up, loses to What A Dump.

 

10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations for Championship Saturday Results: 

Legends: 6,884
Sticky Bandits: 1,969
What A Dump: 805
Mavericks: 342

#1 Legends (8-0-0) vs #7 Mavericks (3-5-0)
Avg PF: Legends 43.00 (1st) — Mavericks 29.88 (5th)
Avg PA: Legends 22.00 (1st) — Mavericks 37.62 (6th)
SOS: Legends .420 (8th) — Mavericks .516 (3rd)
TSL Rank: Legends 2nd — Mavericks 37th
Past Games: Legends 56-24
Line: Legends (-14)

 

GF: What a great win by the Mavericks last week, pulling off quite the upset that I don’t think many people had written down. An OT victory over Eyes Downtown was amazing, but at this point they’re not going to catch the Legends sleeping. At least I don’t think so. LEGENDS BY 20

TSLQBPR: Legends haven’t lost a game all season, and the Mavericks (despite a truly incredible showing against Eyes Downtown) are still not even a .500 team.  It’s an easy pick for the winner here, just a question of how close this should be.  LEGENDS BY 11

 

#3 Sticky Bandits (4-4-0) vs #4 What A Dump (3-4-1)
Avg PF: Sticky Bandits 38.75 (2nd) — What A Dump 27.75 (6th)
Avg PA: Sticky Bandits 32.88 (5th) — What A Dump 29.25 (3rd)
SOS: Sticky Bandits .484 (6th) — What A Dump .500 (4th)
TSL Rank: Sticky Bandits 25th — What A Dump 29th
Past Games: Sticky Bandits 56-33
Line: Sticky Bandits (-4)

 

GF: The Sticky Bandits have been a little bi-polar this season (Shout Out Bi-Polar Express!), as attendance issues with key players and injuries certainly shook things up this year. But they’re getting right on track at the right time, and when they do, it’s hard to stop them. What A Dump has had a really nice year, and they’re going to be even better in the spring. But it’s not the spring just yet. STICKY BANDITS BY 10

 

TSLQBPR: The Sticky Bandits are much better than the 4-4 record they carried into the playoffs, and it’s well known that they were playing shorthanded for much of the season.  But What A Dump is riding the “Kayla Voss is really good” wave as far as it’ll take them.  Should be a closer game than the last time these teams met (What a Dump by 23) or the last time these teams met in the playoffs (Sticky Bandits by 10, last Spring).  STICKY BANDITS BY 3

 

CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS

 

GF: #1 Legends vs #3 Sticky Bandits. Sticky HAS come into this battle before and they’ve pulled the upset. I wouldn’t count them out of this completely, but I also feel like we haven’t really seen the Legends’ Final Form this season just yet, and we will in this one. LEGENDS BY 9

TSLQBPR: #1 Legends vs #3 Sticky Bandits. Yes, the Sticky Bandits have won this battle before, and if they’re healthy they have a chance to do it again.  But they need everything to go right, and Legends probably needs to collapse a little.  This could be Championship #6 for Legends on Saturday.  LEGENDS BY 8

D2

Last Week’s Games

#3 The Malones 41, #6 Grey Hair – Don’t Care 36

#4 Can’t Touch This 47, #5 Scared Hitless 26

 

The Malones beat Grey Hair in a battle that was much closer than expected, while Can’t Touch This just dominated Scared Hitless en route to an easy win. 

 

10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations for Championship Saturday Results: 

Can’t Touch This: 2,901
Passing While Intoxicated: 2,825
Jabronies: 2,508
The Malones: 1,766

 

#1 Jabronies (7-1-0) vs #4 Can’t Touch This (4-4-0)
Avg PF: Jabronies 37.75 (1st) — Can’t Touch This 34.50 (4th)
Avg PA: Jabronies 30.12 (3rd) — Can’t Touch This 25.88 (1st)
SOS: Jabronies .422 (6th) — Can’t Touch This .500 (3rd)
TSL Rank: Jabronies 6th — Can’t Touch This 23rd
Past Games: Jabronies 44-38
Line: Jabronies (-2)

 

GF: The Jabronies have been the feel good story of the year in D2, going from “almost there” to HOLY CRAP THEY’RE THERE. The Jabs have the best offense in the division, and they’re going up against the best defense in the division. Defense wins championships, right? Well, they especially do when they have a supermodel quarterback who can throw the ball further than a young John Elway. The Jabronies have the top end talent overall, but give me the team who’s getting hot at the right time, has the better QB, and has the better defense overall. B’s Brother’s simulations beat me to it here. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 6

TSLQBPR: Isn’t it crazy that the #4 seed feels like the favorite against the #1 seed coming off a first round bye?  But that’s kind of where we’re at here isn’t it?  Jabronies are playing with confidence, but Can’t Touch This is playing with Ryan.  Feels like a coin flip.  JABRONIES BY 1

 

#2 Passing While Intoxicated (5-3-0) vs #3 The Malones (5-3-0)
Avg PF: PWI 37.38 (3rd) — The Malones 37.50 (2nd)
Avg PA: PWI 29.62 (2nd) — The Malones 34.12 (4th)
SOS: PWI .531 (2nd) — The Malones .547 (1st)
TSL Rank: PWI 11th — The Malones 19th
Past Games: PWI 44-38 | PWI 46-24
Line: Passing While Intoxicated (-2)

 

GF: The Malones took care of business last week, but it shouldn’t have been as close as it was. They haven’t been the strongest of teams as of late, and something feels off about them as of late. Now they’re playing a PWI team that’s just beaten them twice recently, and the second game wasn’t even much of a contest. Meanwhile, PWI is trending upwards in all of the right ways. The Malones will not go down without a fight, but they will go down. PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED BY 3

 

TSLQBPR: Agreed on all of that.  The Malones just haven’t looked good enough in the last month for us to pick them here.  PWI has looked like world beaters and they seem to have the Malones’ number.  Give us PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED BY 7

 

CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS

 

GF: #2 Passing While Intoxicated vs #4 Can’t Touch This, just how everyone predicted things will go. One thing is for sure, that whoever wins this game will EARN it. This feels like we’re going to see a high scoring, fun affair and honestly seeing both of these teams jump to D1 next season would be some must watch football. Call me crazy, but…CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 1

 

TSLQBPR: #1 Jabronies vs #2 Passing While Intoxicated.  These two teams have ALREADY met in a Finals before, right?  If we’re remembering correctly, Jabronies won 12-7 in the D3 Finals a couple seasons ago.  Twelve points isn’t going to get the job done in this one, but both offenses have evolved quite a bit since then.  JABRONIES BY 5

D3

 

Last Week’s Games

 

#1 Wanderers 31, #8 GirthQuakes 20

#2 Bullet Club 34, #7 Practice Squad 25

#3 Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 60, #6 Buffalo Vice 40

#5 D-Generation X Y and Z 44, #4 Cunning Stunts 43

 

Another D3 playoff, another round of chaos. The Wanderers avenged their earlier loss to the GQs in a game that got a little heated by the end of it, Bullet Club avenged their earlier loss to the Squad as well to move on in the playoffs as well. ILF put up 60 points on Buffalo Vice which was almost mean, and DXYZ went for two points and got it at the end of the game to take down the Stunts in a classic. 

10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations for Championship Saturday Results: 

Interdimensional Lightning Falcons: 3,218
D-Generation X Y and Z: 2,761
Wanderers: 2,706
Bullet Club: 1,315

 

#1 Wanderers (6-2-0) vs #5 D-Generation X Y and Z (4-4-0)
Avg PF: Wanderers 40.88 (2nd) — D-Gen XYZ 32.62 (4th)
Avg PA: Wanderers 34.75 (5th) — D-Gen XYZ 26.12 (1st)
SOS: Wanderers .484 (5th) — D-Gen XYZ .500 (4th)
TSL Rank: Wanderers 10th — D-Gen XYZ 24th
Past Games: Wanderers 46-24
Line: Wanderers (-3)

 

GF: DXYZ had a great win over the Stunts last week, but now they need to be nearly perfect to get past the Wanderers. If the Keller clan can force Frank into a few bad throws, they have a path to victory, but I’m not entirely sure they can keep up with the Wanderers offensively. WANDERERS BY 8

TSLQBPR: There are seemingly two versions of the Wanderers - the ones that show up in the regular season and kill everyone, and the ones that show up in the playoffs and get upset by PWI/Practice Squad/Can’t Touch This/Bullet Club.  Are they going to go home early again?  Not this time (we think).  WANDERERS BY 13

 

#2 Bullet Club (5-3-0) vs #3 Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (5-3-0)
Avg PF: Bullet Club 28.62 (6th) — ILF 32.50 (5th)
Avg PA: Bullet Club 30.88 (3rd) — ILF 26.50 (2nd)
SOS: Bullet Club .469 (7th) — ILF .469 (7th)
TSL Rank: Bullet Club 13th — ILF 16th
Past Games: Bullet Club 24-19
Line: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (-4)

 

GF: ILF is the lower seed, and they’re favored in this game? Another week of Bullet Club getting disrespected, especially when they have already beaten ILF before. However, these two teams are pretty evenly matched, and the “Game of the Day” potential is here if both sides show up. BULLET CLUB BY 1

 

TSLQBPR: Buddy is going to go off with his usual Buddy moves here.  Scramble, scramble, dagger down the field.  We don’t think Bullet Club will get too many stops.  But frankly neither will ILF.  Absolute “Game of the Day” potential here for sure.  We’ll take ILF BY 2

 

CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS

 

GF: #1 Wanderers vs #2 Bullet Club. A playoff rematch of last season’s OT epic, but this time it’s for the title. You have the Wanderers on one side, looking to finally claim that D3 title that’s eluded them for years. On the other side, you have Bullet Club, looking to win their first title since 2018. Add into the history between the teams and you have one hell of a scripted storyline. WANDERERS BY 2

 

TSLQBPR: #1 Wanderers vs #3 ILF.  The regular season matchup came down to the final plays, and we don’t expect this one to be much different.  ILF has a dynamic, exciting mobile QB with a history of winning big games.  But don't Wanderers have that, and more? Nothing would shock us about this game in terms of outcome or score, but it might FINALLY be Wanderers time to hoist a championship trophy at the Banquet.  WANDERERS BY 5

D4

 

Last Week’s Games

 

#2 Puckett All-Stars 34, #7 Cobblestone 33

#3 PowerPuff Girls 21, #6 Come From Behind 0 (Forfeit)

#4 Mike’s Detailing 47, #5 Ready To Retire 6

Come From Behind made the wise move to not play in the monsoon, giving the PowerPuff Girls the pass to the next round. Puckett All-Stars had to outlast Cobblestone, preventing Darryl from completing a magical win by stopping the potential game winning 2 point conversion. And Mike’s Detailing just stomped RTR. 

 

10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations for Championship Saturday Results: 

Two Tuddies: 5,958
Puckett All-Stars: 2,060
Mike’s Detailing: 1,136
PowerPuff Girls: 846

 

#1 Two Tuddies (8-0-0) vs #4 Mike’s Detailing (4-4-0)
Avg PF: Two Tuddies 36.75 (1st) — Mike’s Detailing 32.62 (2nd)
Avg PA: Two Tuddies 15.62 (1st) — Mike’s Detailing 29.12 (5th)
SOS: Two Tuddies .408 (7th) — Mike’s Detailing .491 (3rd)
TSL Rank: Two Tuddies 7th — Mike’s Detailing 22nd
Past Games: Two Tuddies 30-22
Line: Two Tuddies (-9)

 

GF: Whatever changes the Two Tuddies made to the roster for this season, they’ve worked better than they ever could’ve imagined. Undefeated record, top offense, and the top defense in the division? I don’t think they give a GM of the Year award at the banquet (Which is December 5th!) but if they did, here’s your winner. TWO TUDDIES BY 14

 

TSLQBPR: Look at the points scored for each team, which you’ve written above.  37 PPG for Tuddies, 33 PPG for Mike’s.  Not that far off!  Now look at the points against for each team.  16 PPG (BEST IN THE LEAGUE) for Tuddies, 29 PPG for Mike’s (5th best in a 7 team division).  There’s the difference.  TWO TUDDIES BY 11

 

#2 Puckett All-Stars (6-2-0) vs #3 PowerPuff Girls (5-3-0)
Avg PF: Puckett 27.00 (4th) — PowerPuff Girls 26.00 (5th)
Avg PA: Puckett 20.50 (2nd) — PowerPuff Girls 27.14 (4th)
SOS: Puckett .449 (6th) — PowerPuff Girls .479 (5th)
TSL Rank: Puckett 9th — PowerPuff Girls 21st
Past Games: Puckett All-Stars 31-17
Line: Puckett All-Stars (-4)

 

GF: Puckett has looked VERY good this season, and I think if the Tud Buds weren’t so impressive, plus the addition of the gender team to D4, they’d be getting a LOT more publicity. They have a killer defense, and they’ve already beaten the PPGs once this season. It was an up and down year for the ladies this time around, but a lot of that had to do with their QB not being there for them every week which led to some losses that may not have happened if he were here. I think he’s going to be here this week, so…POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 4

 

TSLQBPR: Puckett used to be famous for having underwhelming regular seasons and then suddenly bringing their “A game” for playoffs.  But if they’re not careful, they’re going to get “Pucketted” by PowerPuff Girls, who (we think) lost all their games with backup QBs this season.  Kyle is a difference maker.  POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 8

 

CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS

 

GF: #1 Two Tuddies vs #3 PowerPuff Girls. The rivalry continues, although it appears that the power has swung the way of the Tuddies. I’m excited to see how this is going to play out, but I think we’re in for big win for the Tuddieverse. Besides, ONE of the Tuddies teams has to win something, right? TWO TUDDIES BY 7

 

TSLQBPR: #1 Two Tuddies vs #3 PowerPuff Girls. PowerPuff Girls won the last Championship game against the Tuddies just a few months ago, and they’ve kept virtually the same roster since then.  Tuddies have improved quite a bit, and it won’t be as easy for the Girls to move the ball against them as it was last session.  Kyle will need a nearly perfect game… and we think he has one in him.  POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 1

D5

 

Last Week’s Games

 

#1 Balls Deep 33, #8 Mo’ Chicken 12

#2 Blitzkrieg 24, #7 Sausage McMuffins 22

#6 Pit Harade 22, #3 Bridget & Quit It 16

#4 Not So Sticky 32, #5 Stir the Sauce 27

 

Balls Deep kept it rolling, frying Mo’ Chicken to put them out of their misery this season. Blitzkrieg took on their old friends the McMuffins and barely held on to beat them. Pit Harade held strong against Bridget & Quit It for an upset victory, and Not So Sticky prevented the sauce from being stirred, beating STS. 

 

10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations for Championship Saturday Results: 

Balls Deep: 6,520
Not So Sticky: 2,129
Blitzkrieg: 964
Pit Harade: 387

 

#1 Balls Deep (7-1-0) vs #6 Pit Harade (3-5-0)
Avg PF: Balls Deep 39.38 (1st) — Pit Harade 20.88 (5th)
Avg PA: Balls Deep 18.00 (1st) — Pit Harade 26.62 (5th)
SOS: Balls Deep .469 (6th) — Pit Harade .518 (3rd)
TSL Rank: Balls Deep 5th — Pit Harade 35th
Past Games: Balls Deep 36-10
Line: Balls Deep (-14)

 

GF: Pit Harade has been playing better in the second half of the season, but Balls Deep has been so, so good all season. They have the best of everything in D5, and they’re already earmarked for D4 whether they know it or not. PH needs to play mistake free football to make this a game, but I think we’ll see Balls Deep pull away as the game goes on. BALLS DEEP BY 13

 

TSLQBPR: Balls Deep are the class of the division.  Best offense + best defense + best record = best playoff odds, for sure.  Pit Harade is sneakily a better team than their seeding would have you believe… but there’s “better than you think” and there’s “better than Balls Deep”.  BALLS DEEP BY 15

 

#2 Blitzkrieg (5-3-0) vs #4 Not So Sticky (5-3-0)
Avg PF: Blitzkrieg 33.88 (2nd) — Not So Sticky 25.88 (4th)
Avg PA: Blitzkrieg 31.50 (7th) — Not So Sticky 20.25 (2nd)
SOS: Blitzkrieg .531 (1st) — Not So Sticky .469 (6th)
TSL Rank: Blitzkrieg 14th — Not So Sticky 17th
Past Games: Not So Sticky 30-24
Line: Not So Sticky (-2)

GF: Fall Blitzkrieg is a team that doesn’t have much trouble scoring, but they DO struggle to stop other teams from doing so, as evidenced by their atrocious defense rating. It’s the only thing really holding them back from winning it all. Not So Sticky is too smart, and with TSL Leading Rusher Ricky Recckio taking the snaps they’ll control the clock, and they’ll pick apart the defense with relative ease. NOT SO STICKY BY 7

 

TSLQBPR: The first matchup of these teams this session was close enough, and their records were identical entering the playoffs.  This should be one of the more evenly contested matchups of the day.  We don’t expect a lot of stops in this game from either team,  but if there’s a SLIGHT edge to grant to either side, we’ll give it to the veterans every time.  NOT SO STICKY BY 2

CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS

 

GF: #1 Balls Deep vs #4 Not So Sticky. This is your casual reminder that the “1” behind the “1” in “7-1” for Balls Deep’s record was Not So Sticky, who walked off with a 27-16 win a couple of weeks ago. While that should probably inspire Balls Deep to want to beat them even more, perhaps they might get scared and grip the ball too hard? The veteran team that is Not So Sticky have been here before, many times, and I think that might end up being a factor. NOT SO STICKY BY 3

 

TSLQBPR: #1 Balls Deep vs #4 Not So Sticky.  Balls Deep definitely has an aura, a hype, whatever you want to call it, that they almost seem unbeatable right now to most other D5 teams.  But we don’t think that will factor into a game against Not So Sticky, who already won the first matchup and don’t seem intimidated by anyone.  So if this game comes down to talent, who has more of it?  Well… the standings and the stats both say that’s Balls Deep, and who are we to argue?  BALLS DEEP BY 7

D6

 

Last Week’s Games: 

 

Round 1:

 

#5 Intentional Clowning 29, #12 Puck Bunnies 16

#11 Sticky Laces 26, #6 TMA 8, 

#7 Three Tuddies 44, #10 Raw Milkers 23

#8 Select 32, #9 Four Tuddies 0

 

Round 2:

 

#1 The Chargers 21, #11 Sticky Laces 0 (Forfeit)

#2 Flying Balls 30, #7 Select 29

#3 Blue Ballers 50, #6 Three Tuddies 6

#4 Irish Giants 21, #5 Intentional Clowning 20

 

Not too many surprises from the first weekend of the D6 playoffs. Sticky Laces did upset TMA before forfeiting against The Chargers. Select dominated the Four Tuddies before coming OH SO CLOSE to beating the Flying Balls. Intentional Clowning got by the Puck Bunnies before losing by a point to the Irish Giants, and 3 Tudz beat up on the Raw Milkers before getting smacked by the Blue Ballers. 

 

10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations for Championship Saturday Results: 

Flying Balls: 4,179
The Chargers: 3,522
Blue Ballers: 1,759
Irish Giants: 540

 

#1 The Chargers (7-1-0) vs #4 Irish Giants (6-2-0)
Avg PF: Chargers 41.38 (3rd) — Irish Giants 26.00 (6th)
Avg PA: Chargers 19.62 (2nd) — Irish Giants 19.88 (3rd)
SOS: Chargers .500 (5th) — Irish Giants .500 (5th)
TSL Rank: Chargers 12th — Irish Giants 18th
Past Games: Irish Giants 25-18
Line: The Chargers (-8)

 

GF: The Irish Giants are a formidable foe for The Chargers as shown by the fact that they’re the only ones that beat The Chargers in a game this season, although I’ve been told they were quite shorthanded. I think this game will be closer than you think, but it’s hard to go against the boys in blue. THE CHARGERS BY 6

 

TSLQBPR: Irish Giants are a great team.  Whether you like veteran experience of straight athleticism, they have either one.  But the Chargers were AWESOME this season (debatably too awesome for D6), and there’s no chance we’re picking against them in the Semi-Finals.  THE CHARGERS BY 11

 

#2 Flying Balls (7-1-0) vs #3 Blue Ballers (6-2-0)
Avg PF: Flying Balls 45.12 (1st) — Blue Ballers 44.62 (2nd)
Avg PA: Flying Balls 18.50 (1st) — Blue Ballers 26.12 (5th)
SOS: Flying Balls .516 (4th) — Blue Ballers .500 (5th)
TSL Rank: Flying Balls 4th — Blue Ballers 9th
Past Games: Flying Balls 54-44
Line: Flying Balls (-4)

 

GF: The Flying Balls got the scare they needed to wake up in these playoffs after Select almost took them out. The Balls are first in everything, and it's still amazing they average only 18 points a game after allowing 44 to the Blue Ballers. The over/under for this game is 89.5 (see below) and I think I’d take the over. The Blue Ballers will be in this game the whole time. FLYING BALLS BY 4

 

TSLQBPR: We agree that the Blue Ballers will be in this game the whole time.  Blue Ballers are a fast paced, athletic team with a great QB.  And in another universe, they might have been massive favorites in the D6 playoffs if Flying Balls and The Chargers hadn’t come out of nowhere to hijack this division.  But it’s a Flying Balls world, and we’re just living in it.  FLYING BALLS BY 8

 

CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS

 

GF: #1 The Chargers vs #2 Flying Balls. This should be 1A vs 1B, and it’s the title match we all wanted, or expected at least. These two teams are the best of the best and they’re slightly overpowered for this division. The Chargers squeaked by the Flying Balls 32-24 in the last week of the regular season, but I’m not sure they do it again. FLYING BALLS BY 2

 

TSLQBPR: #1 The Chargers vs #2 Flying Balls.  Could either the Irish Giants or Blue Ballers crash the party here and spoil this matchup of #1 vs #2?  Of course.  But these have been the two best teams in the division all season, and this is who we’re expecting to finish it.  The Chargers got a week off last week after the Sticky Laces forfeit, while Flying Balls had to battle back just to overcome Select.  Does that mean anything for this week?  Probably not.  Expect a classic, and whoever blinks first and drops a wide open sixth down TD is going to spend the entire offseason regretting it.  We’ll take THE CHARGERS BY 4

GAME LINES AND OVER/UNDERS: 

Legends vs Mavericks
Spread: Legends -14
Moneyline: Legends -650 / Mavericks +450
Over/Under: 72.5

Sticky Bandits vs What A Dump
Spread: Sticky Bandits -4
Moneyline: Sticky Bandits -175 / What A Dump +150
Over/Under: 66.5

Jabronies vs Can’t Touch This
Spread: Jabronies -2
Moneyline: Jabronies -130 / Can’t Touch This +110
Over/Under: 72.5

Passing While Intoxicated vs The Malones
Spread: Passing While Intoxicated -2
Moneyline: PWI -130 / The Malones +110
Over/Under: 75.0

Wanderers vs D-Generation X Y and Z
Spread: Wanderers -3
Moneyline: Wanderers -155 / D-Gen XYZ +135
Over/Under: 73.5

Interdimensional Lightning Falcons vs Bullet Club
Spread: ILF -4
Moneyline: ILF -175 / Bullet Club +150
Over/Under: 61.5

Two Tuddies vs Mike’s Detailing
Spread: Two Tuddies -9
Moneyline: Two Tuddies -350 / Mike’s Detailing +270
Over/Under: 69.5

Puckett All-Stars vs PowerPuff Girls
Spread: Puckett All-Stars -4
Moneyline: Puckett -175 / PowerPuff Girls +150
Over/Under: 53.0

Balls Deep vs Pit Harade
Spread: Balls Deep -14
Moneyline: Balls Deep -650 / Pit Harade +450
Over/Under: 60.5

Not So Sticky vs Blitzkrieg
Spread: Not So Sticky -2
Moneyline: Not So Sticky -130 / Blitzkrieg +110
Over/Under: 60.0

The Chargers vs Irish Giants
Spread: The Chargers -8
Moneyline: Chargers -310 / Irish Giants +240
Over/Under: 67.5

Flying Balls vs Blue Ballers
Spread: Flying Balls -4
Moneyline: Flying Balls -175 / Blue Ballers +150
Over/Under: 89.5

 

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR CHAMPIONSHIP SATURDAY

 

 

• WHO IS THE TEAM NOT GETTING ENOUGH RESPECT CURRENTLY THAT WILL END UP WINNING IT ALL? Puckett All-Stars. They’re a good team with a great defense that plays hard. They’ve already beaten the PPGs, and they only lost to the Tuddies by 2 points. They absolutely could take the title home. 

 

 

 

• WHAT #1 SEED HAS THE MOST PRESSURE ON THEM TO WIN? It has to be the Wanderers. They’re always the #1 seed it seems and they never, ever, end up winning the title. The Legends don't have any pressure on them. Jabronies shouldn’t have any either. Two Tuddies are having the best season they’ve ever had. Balls Deep is coasting, The Chargers know they’re really good. It’s the Wanderers, for sure. 

 

 

 

• WHO IS THE MOST OVERLOOKED TEAM REMAINING? I don’t consider Puckett “overlooked”, so I feel like this is a different question. For overlooked, I think What A Dump is the most overlooked team remaining. Not a soul is thinking they can beat the Legends, which might give them the fuel they needed to shock the world. Probably not though. 

 

 

 

• WHICH DIVISION HAS THE BEST SHOT FOR ANY OF THE REMAINING TEAMS TO WIN? It’s probably D2 this time around. Normally I’d say D3, but I think overall if anyone from D2 walked away as champions, it wouldn’t be surprising. 

 

 

 

• WHAT MATTERS THE MOST FOR A CHAMPIONSHIP TEAM? While I’m tempted to say QB, the answer is, and always will be, how good your female players are. If you have a distinct advantage there, you should never lose the game. 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR CHAMPIONSHIP SATURDAY

 

 

• Even though you had to deal with rain for a chunk of the games last Saturday, it’s looking like a 68ish degree sunny day at the fields to determine our champions. And the weather seems like it’ll improve as the day continues. 

 

 

 

• Games of the Day: 

• ALL OF THEM, ITS CHAMPIONSHIP SATURDAY!

 

 

 

• It’s weird to have a Championship Saturday without Eyes Downtown. 

 

 

 

• The TSL Banquet is set for Friday, December 5th! It’s the best time of the offseason. Sign up here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1w_1nExRYf1oM0WatWDCtBi1shilvNE2wcwCf2Jt8lKU/edit

 

 

 

• If you think you know who should be winning some of our TSL awards, go nominate them here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1utq3uTfF9kJ9ujn2Nsmy5p-c-jR1tX_tKQJ3i2rFQhE/edit#responses

 

 

 

• BUT WAIT! THERE’S THE WINTER LEAGUE TOO! January 10th - March 14th. Sign up here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1ENoNbF9bIduHGF6EnkcdVKv6k6ssXid5OERuT04ioWo/edit

 

 

 

• I hope we never have a season without Breakfast Club ever again. 

 

 

 

• As always, the tensions will be HIGH tomorrow. Keep yourself, and your teammates, in check whether it’s against a player on the other team upsetting you, or much more importantly if you don’t agree with Ref’s call, DON’T be a jerk and get kicked out of the game. 

 

 

 

• PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don’t just be “on time” to your game, be EARLY. The league wants to run these games as close as possible to the schedule as they can. 

 

 

 

• Thank you again for another fantastic season of TSL football. It’s much more challenging to do this article from my cabin in Des Moines, Iowa compared to when I was there in the league with you, and then got even harder when we lost Lenny and Rameer. I appreciate all of the emails you’ve sent me, and I look forward to doing it all again in the Spring. 

 

Good luck to the final 24 teams remaining. Immortality is at your fingertips! 

 

-GF OUT

WEEK 8 THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 03 October 2025 18:22

Published: Friday, 03 October 2025 18:22

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 1113

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality starts in a week! As the Fall 2025 season enters its final set of regular season games, the story lines for each division are really starting to take shape. At this point in your season, you know who you are. You know if you have a realistic chance at immortality or not. At this point, you’re just hoping things go your way so you have the easiest path possible to a title. 

 

There are a decent amount of things at stake this week, and while most things are just for positioning purposes, there are still a couple of byes that are up for grabs too. When you consider just how many upsets happen on Playoff Saturday, having to play one less game is quite the advantage. 

 

Let’s take a closer look this week and what’s going on in each division as we prepare for the playoffs next week. 

D1

 

Sticky Bandits 51, Unit Ha Ha 18
Eyes Downtown 35, Frodo Swaggins 32
What a Dump 38, Mavericks 29
Legends 31, Freeballers 30
Freeballers 25, What a Dump 24

 

Sticky Nation smoked UHH in the only D1 blowout of the day, while everyone else had to earn their wins; ED barely survived Frodo, What A Dump took a “not exactly unexpected” win over Mavericks then dropped an “okay that was VERY unexpected” game against Freeballers, who then almost upset Legends? WTF?

 

WHAT’S AT STAKE? There are no byes in D1 to worry about, so it’s all seeding.  Legends have locked up the #1 seed, so that’s off the table.  Eyes Downtown can lock up #2 with a win, but can fall as low as #4 with a loss.  Every other team is just jockeying for their final spot. But in recent weeks, we’ve seen the gap between the top teams and the bottom teams shrink considerably. Legends and Freeballers may be the slight outliers, but that middle group is primed for some excellent football soon. 

 

STICKY BANDITS VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+5) - Frodo has one loss this season by more than 3 points.  They’re better than you think they are, and might be the upset of the week.  FRODO BY 1

EYES DOWNTOWN VS WHAT A DUMP (+4) - Eyes Downtown “won the breakup” last season, but What A Dump has a chance to pass them in the standings on the last day of THIS season.  But will they?? EYES DOWNTOWN BY 3

WHAT A DUMP VS UNIT HA HA (+12) - UHH may respond to last week’s humiliation by digging deep and finding an extra gear… but it won’t be enough to beat a WAD team that’s really finding its stride at the right time.  WHAT A DUMP BY 11

 

FREEBALLERS VS UNIT HA HA (+3) - Who’s throwing for Freeballers this weekend?  If they have a stud sub QB under center, they’ve got a great chance.  If it’s the “real” Freeballers vs Unit Ha Ha, that is a much tighter game.  UNIT HA HA BY 1

LEGENDS VS MAVERICKS (+12) - Legends have nothing to play for except that undefeated season.  Mavericks probably need this more, but how much does that matter?  Legends are Legends and they’re going to Legend.  LEGENDS BY 8

D2

Scared Hitless 38, Grey Hair – Don’t Care 25
Passing While Intoxicated 44, The Malones 38
Jabronies 35, Passing While Intoxicated 34

 

PWI took down The Malones and ALMOST Jabronies as well, pushing themselves into the “we really ARE legit contenders” tier of D2.  GHDC lost to Scared Hitless, to ensure that they remain in the “we really are NOT legit contenders” tier of D2.

 

WHAT’S AT STAKE? There are two byes in D2 and right now they’re held by Jabronies and the Malones.  Jabronies have already locked up a first round bye, so all they can lose this week is positioning if they lose and Malones win.  The big game is Malones vs PWI this week, as the winner of that game should take the #2 seed and earn themselves a week off, while the loser gets a first-round date with “nothing to play for, already in last place” Grey Hair - Don’t Care.  Can’t Touch This and Scared Hitless are just jockeying for seeding. 

CAN’T TOUCH THIS VS SCARED HITLESS (+5) - It’s the battle of “worse than we all thought they’d be” vs “better than we all thought they’d be” and you know exactly which is which without me saying it.  Scared Hitless won their first battle, so naturally CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 6

JABRONIES VS GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE (+10) - These teams are headed in very different directions.  Everything Joe Miano touches turns to gold, while GHDC are still looking for their first win of the season.  They won’t find it here.  JABRONIES BY 13

THE MALONES VS PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED (+1) - This should be the best matchup of the day in D2.  Both teams have the firepower to win shootouts, and this should come down to the last drive.  It’s just so tough to imagine the Malones dropping three in a row.  THE MALONES BY 1

D3

Practice Squad 23, Bullet Club 14
Wanderers 52, Buffalo Vice 46
D-Generation X Y and Z 31, GirthQuakes 12

 

Practice Squad shocked Bullet Club in what can only be considered an upset W; Wanderers beat Buffalo Vice in a game that scored “only” 98 points (be better, guys); and DXYZ beat GirthQuakes, because of course they did

 

WHAT’S AT STAKE? There are no byes in D3, and Wanderers have already locked up the #1 seed.  GirthQuakes have locked up the #8 seed, so we already know one first round matchup is Wanderers vs GirthQuakes (Wanderers worst nightmare!).  Everyone else is exactly where you expected them to be: 4 teams at 4-3, one at 3-4, and Practice Squad is a feisty 2-5. Lots of  fighting for position this week. 

 

WANDERERS VS CUNNING STUNTS (+1) - Wanderers have nothing to play for (not even an undefeated season).  The Stunts have EVERYTHING to play for, so I’ll give them the edge.  STUNTS BY 2

BUFFALO VICE VS BULLET CLUB (+3) - The standings say that Bullet Club is a better team, the scores say that Buffalo Vice is a better team.  Who wins on Saturday?  My head says Bullet Club, but my desire to see a really convoluted D3 tiebreaking situation for playoffs says BUFFALO VICE BY 4

INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS VS GIRTHQUAKES (+8) - Remember when GirthQuakes beat Wanderers?  That feels like a long time ago.  ILF is playing better ball this season, and they continue to on Saturday.  ILF BY 10

D-GENERATION X Y AND Z VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+9) - DXYZ is one point behind Wanderers for best point differential in D3.  Practice Squad are many, many points behind that.  B is gonna be B… but D-GENERATION X Y AND Z BY 5

D4

Mike’s Detailing 56, Come from Behind 14
Two Tuddies 22, Puckett All-Stars 20

 

Mike’s Detailing beat the snot out of Come From Behind while Two Tuddies won a surprisingly (or is it?) close game against Puckett.

 

WHAT’S AT STAKE? There is one bye in D4, and Two Tuddies have already locked it up, making their game meaningless this week.  Come From Behind and Cobblestone are guaranteed to finish #6 and #7 respectively, and everyone else is just fighting to see who is #2-#5.

 

TWO TUDDIES VS COBBLESTONE (+18) - How is the betting line only +18 for this? I guess maybe Danwin & Chris could collide and knock each other unconscious, and then Cobblestone would only lose by 10.  Assuming that doesn’t happen, TWO TUDDIES BY 24

MIKE’S DETAILING VS PUCKETT ALL-STARS (+3) - THIS should be a battle of two really good, playoff ready teams.  Could go either way because Puckett is solid as hell, but I’m REALLY digging this Mike’s offense lately.  MIKE’S DETAILING BY 4

READY TO RETIRE VS COME FROM BEHIND (+7) - Ready to Retire may be low in the standings, but they’re basically, ALMOST a .500 team.  Come From Behind are not.  Looking at that point differential… whoof.  Give me READY TO RETIRE BY 11

MIKE’S DETAILING VS POWERPUFF GIRLS (+9) - PowerPuff Girls have used so many backup QBs this year it seems like we haven’t seen their full potential yet.  Is Kyle throwing this week?  Either way, Mike’s has just looked so strong it’s hard to imagine most teams keeping up, even one as good as the PowerPuff Girls.  MIKE’S DETAILING BY 2

D5

Sausage McMuffins 20, Bridget & Quit It 16
Pit Harade 41, Mo’ Chicken 14
Not So Sticky 27, Balls Deep 16

 

Not So Sticky beat up on a shorthanded Balls Deep to end their undefeated season; Pit Harade beat up on the only team struggling more than them this season; and Sausage McMuffins with an impressive upset over the “people thought they might go undefeated” Bridget & Quit It

 

WHAT’S AT STAKE? There are no byes in D5, and only one team (Mo’ Chicken at #8) has locked up their spot.  Everything else is at stake here for positioning, and most teams still have the potential for big movements up or down the standings (three teams could still take the top seed here).

 

BALLS DEEP VS BLITZKRIEG (+6) - Two D5 juggernauts run it back, after Balls Deep (barely) took the first encounter way back in week one.  The TSL might be treated to a classic here.  BLITZKRIEG BY 3

BRIDGET & QUIT IT VS STIR THE SAUCE (+5) - Bridget & Quit It was unstoppable… until they suddenly started getting stopped, in three of their last four games.  Stir the Sauce can pass them in the standings with a win here, but would Bobby really allow one of his teams to lose four out of five?  BRIDGET & QUIT IT BY 5

NOT SO STICKY VS PIT HARADE (+8) - These teams also played back in Week One and NSS took it by a score of 21-10.  This one will be closer, but the same result.  NOT SO STICKY BY 2

D6

Intentional Clowning 39, TMA 35
The Chargers 37, Puck Bunnies 25
Raw Milkers 31, Sticky Laces 14
Three Tuddies 22, Four Tuddies 20
Flying Balls 50, Four Tuddies 8
Blue Ballers 34, Select 6

 

Puck Bunnies nearly shocked the world against a (very) short-handed Chargers team until their reinforcements arrived; TMA’s chances of a first round bye took a bit hit with a loss against Intentional Clowning; Raw Milkers coasted to an easy win over Sticky Laces; Flying Balls did what Flying Balls do against Four Tuddies, and it wasn’t pretty; Blue Ballers ran up the score on poor Select; and finally Three Tuddies won the Inaugural Tuddy Bowl with a big W over Four Tuddies

 

WHAT’S AT STAKE? There are four byes in D6 (not bye WEEKS, but bye GAMES; every team will have to play at LEAST once on October 11th, and many teams will have to play twice) and only Flying Balls and the Chargers have locked up their byes (whoever wins their game this weekend will be the #1 seed, and the loser will be the #2 seed).  Blue Ballers and Irish Giants both control their own destiny and can earn byes with a win, but Intentional Clowning and TMA each MIGHT have a chance to crash the party and steal one if Blue Ballers or Irish Giants stumble.  Everyone else is playing for seeding, except for Puck Bunnies, who have already locked up the #12 seed. D6 is absolutely electric with the nonsense going into the final season, and I’m here for it. 

 

TMA VS THREE TUDDIES (+7) - Three Tuddies had a nice win over Four Tuddies last week, but I think they’ll find that TMA is a little more formidable than their Tuddy brothers and sisters.  TMA BY 11

BLUE BALLERS VS PUCK BUNNIES (+14) - Blue Ballers play fast and aggressive, and half of the Puck Bunnies are still learning how to play this game.  If it’s close in the first half, that’s a huge credit to Maddie, but it won’t be close by the end.  BLUE BALLERS BY 24

FLYING BALLS VS THE CHARGERS (+4) - FINALLY.  The D6 Championship game we all know is coming (until Blue Ballers crash the party and upset someone in the semis).  This will be the first huge challenge for Flying Balls.  Do they even know how to play close games?  FLYING BALLS BY 2

SELECT VS INTENTIONAL CLOWNING (EVEN) - This will be one of the most evenly matched games of the day.  Intentional Clowning has the better offense, Select has the better defense.  But I just flipped a coin and it came up Tails, so INTENTIONAL CLOWNING BY 1

STICKY LACES VS FOUR TUDDIES (+10) - Sticky Laces isn’t favored in too many games this year, but this is definitely one of them.  Somehow these teams have the same record, despite very different stats.  Maybe it’ll be close, maybe it won’t.  STICKY LACES BY 5

IRISH GIANTS VS RAW MILKERS (+6) - When a 5-2 team plays a 2-5 team it’s no surprise who the favorite is… but Raw Milkers play a solid game (just ask Sticky Laces) and no one should write them off yet.  Oh, I’m not picking them to win.  But I’ll pick them to cover the spread, sure.  IRISH GIANTS BY 1

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

How many teams will end this regular season undefeated?  Between Legends, Two Tuddies and Flying Balls, there are three with a chance to pull it off.  If Legends and Tuddies lose it will be because they had nothing to play for.  If Flying Balls lose, it will be because The Chargers are an awesome team. I’ll say one of these giants falls on Saturday and we finish with two undefeated teams this season.

 

Are any of our winless teams going to make magic happen in their last try of the regular season?  Freeballers escaped this conversation with a win last week, but we still have Grey Hair - Don’t Care, Cobblestone, Puck Bunnies, and Mo’ Chicken (who have a tie, but not a win, which I guess makes them “winless” but not as bad of a winless?).  You never know what’s going to happen in “meaningless” games…

 

Which game is the biggest this weekend: Flying Balls vs Chargers, or PWI vs The Malones?  Flying Balls might be the closest thing we have to a Finals preview this weekend… but there’s not much at stake beyond bragging rights.  PWI vs Malones determines who gets a full week off, and that’s why it’s the biggest game of the weekend.

 

Which player has the most pressure on him or this Saturday?  It’s got to be Buddy Lee, right?  He plays the biggest game of the week (see above!) while also trying to navigate ILF out of the 4-3 tangle they find themselves in for D3 seeding right now.  Good thing I’m confident no one cares less about pressure than Buddy.

 

Is weather a factor this weekend?  Actually no, as it looks like we’re going to get yet ANOTHER beautiful day at the Rose Gardens.  It’s impossible that we actually get a great weather season, right? Another October storm is looming for playoffs, right???

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS BEFORE SATURDAY

With the regular season coming to an end, you know what that means: time to start voting on end of season awards winners for the Banquet!  Division MVPs, Most Underrated Players, Most Beloved Players, Team of the Year etc.  I’m told that you can vote on all categories (or just some, or just one… whatever you want) at this link: TSL 2025 Awards Nomination Form - Google Forms

 

Speaking of the Banquet, I’m told that a decision on a venue is almost here, and that the date is DEFINITELY, PROBABLY December 5th, so hold the date and watch for announcements from the League in the next few days.

 

Sure, you COULD fly off the handle and scream at a ref on Saturday… but wouldn’t it be more rewarding to track down a ref you’ve already BEEN brutal to, shake his or her hand, and apologize that you weren’t better to them when they reffed your game?  Wouldn’t you feel better about yourself if you did that?

 

Games of the Day:

10 am - Cunning Stunts vs Wanderers

11 am - The Chargers vs Flying Balls OR Eyes Downtown vs What A Dump

12 pm - Passing While Intoxicated vs The Malones

1 pm - Puckett All-Stars vs Mike’s Detailing

2 pm - D-Generation XYZ vs Practice Squad

3 pm - Mike’s Detailing vs PowerPuff Girls

 

There are no schedule requests for playoff games.  Please stop asking.  I’m told those emails are deleted immediately without being read.

 

Refs DO have the authority to throw Delay of Game penalties against your team if you haven’t paid them yet, so try to be prepared with cash or Venmo (IF the ref accepts Venmo, which remember, they don’t have to)

 

Breakfast Club was missed this session - I know it’s coming back for Spring, but it just doesn’t feel 100% TSLish without Breakfast Club teams

 

If you have any smack you want to talk for the playoffs, or if you have any ideas you think would help the league, please send it to me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. and I’ll tell the masses. 

 

Special shout-out to Garrett Beesing for organizing both a Cornhole Tournament and a Darts Tournament this season.  It’s shit like that that makes this league special.

 

Puck Bunnies beating Blue Ballers would be one of the great upsets in League history… but damn, do we want to see it.

-GF Out

PLAYOFF THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 10 October 2025 20:50

Published: Friday, 10 October 2025 20:50

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 1158

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, are you ready? I said ARE. YOU. READYYYY? We’ve made it. On Saturday, October 11th in the Year of Our Lord 2025 the TSL Universe will descend upon the Leonard T. Alba III Fields behind the Rose Garden with only one thought in their minds: Immortality. After 8 grueling weeks of competition to determine seeding for today, our TSL brothers and sisters will step to the starting line as the Race for Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality begins. 

 

This is what you worked for. This is why you put in those extra training sessions. This is why you cut your friends to make your roster better. This is why you’re already side-eyeing some others on your team to wonder “Are we asking them back?” OR “Do I want to come back to this?”. The drive to be the best, to get your picture taken, to make your teammates get random tattoos on their bodies, to beat those jerks on that team you don’t like; that’s why you’re here. There WILL be hard fought battles. There WILL be absolute blowouts. There WILL be upsets you didn’t see coming. There WILL be at least one, maybe two Kieta blowups (but which one?). Over the next two weeks, when the smoke clears, 6 TSL teams will stand tall, and they will be the Undisputed best Social Co-Ed Touch Football teams not just in the area, not just in the state, but the WORLD. 

 

Despite how confident you’re feeling, things will more than likely NOT go to plan for you. There will be missed throws. There will be easy catches dropped. There will be touchdowns by players you thought you didn’t have to worry about. There will be unexpected injuries. There will be players cracking under the pressure as they want to be the very best, like no one ever was. There will be teams shorthanded because Billy, Ronnie, and Susie had to go to Fall Fest instead. There will be sub requests denied because you didn’t prepare properly for this moment. Most of the TSL will be sad when this is all over, trying to talk themselves into how its okay they lost because it was a good game or “Man, if one or two plays went a different way, we would’ve won” (and then they tell everyone they see about those plays 15-20 times before they leave the fields). 

 

But that’s why Playoff Saturday is one of the best sports days of the year. It’s just as good as the first two days of March Madness. The playoffs never go chalk. There will be upsets. There could very well be overtime games (more than likely in the first round of D6, so everyone who plays at 2:00 has to wait even longer and Jeff Krol will pull out all of his hair as we get way behind schedule). This is going to be one of the most exciting days of the year. There’s only one question that really remains: 

 

Will you survive? 

(The following Vegas Odds were based off of 10,000 simulations that B’s Brother put into Madden ‘26 and ran for us. All of the rankings are based on the division, not the league, except of course for the super secret Topper TSL Ranking system only he still knows about.)

Legends: 

Legends — 2-1

 

Contenders:

Eyes Downtown — 5-1
Sticky Bandits — 7-1

 

Pretenders:

Frodo Swaggins — 14-1
What a Dump — 28-1
Mavericks — 75-1
Unit Ha Ha — 166-1
Freeballers — 232-1

Times Won In 10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations: 

 

Legends — 5,069
Eyes Downtown — 2,220
Sticky Bandits — 1,378
Frodo Swaggins — 701
What a Dump — 378
Mavericks — 152
Unit Ha Ha — 59
Freeballers — 43

The Story: The Legends just keep Legending, as they’ve had little to no trouble with anyone this season. Honestly, if they didn’t exist, we’d have a pretty exciting and competitive playoffs to watch between the other teams. But the story becomes “Who can beat the Legends?”, as it usually does. The last time they felt this dominant was in the fall of 2023. Fun fact, they lost that title to Eyes Downtown. Right now ED feels like the only team with a shot at taking them down, and chances are they won’t. Sticky has a chance, but they’ve been bitten by the injury bug a bit too much this season, and they hadn’t had Mike Thomas nearly as much this season, which has resulted in a few more losses. 

 

#1 LEGENDS (8-0-0) VS #8 FREEBALLERS (1-7-0)
PF: Legends 43.00 (1st) – Freeballers 23.25 (8th)
PA: Legends 22.00 (1st) – Freeballers 37.62 (6th)
SOS: Legends .420 (8th) – Freeballers .578 (1st)
TSL Rank: Legends 2nd – Freeballers 44th
Past Games: Legends 31-30
Line: Legends (-18)

 

I’m pretty sure the Legends played their second stringers in the earlier 31-30 win. The Freeballers took a step back this season, so another year of an amazing upset seems VERY unlikely. LEGENDS BY 20

#2 EYES DOWNTOWN (6-2-0) VS #7 MAVERICKS (3-5-0)
PF: Eyes Downtown 37.75 (3rd) – Mavericks 29.88 (5th)
PA: Eyes Downtown 26.12 (2nd) – Mavericks 37.62 (6th)
SOS: Eyes Downtown .422 (7th) – Mavericks .516 (3rd)
TSL Rank: Eyes Downtown 8th – Mavericks 37th
Past Games: Eyes Downtown 36-32
Line: Eyes Downtown (-10)

 

Eyes Downtown has had a pretty nice season overall, but they still seem a step behind where they need to be to beat the Legends. They get a Mavericks team who’s built a bit of an identity on winning games they “shouldn’t” in the playoffs as of late. The Mavs still need things to go a little perfectly for them, but as the 4 point loss earlier in the season shows, they can hang here. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 2

 

#3 STICKY BANDITS (4-4-0) VS #6 UNIT HA HA (3-5-0)
PF: Sticky Bandits 38.75 (2nd) – Unit Ha Ha 25.50 (7th)
PA: Sticky Bandits 32.88 (5th) – Unit Ha Ha 40.25 (8th)
SOS: Sticky Bandits .484 (5th) – Unit Ha Ha .578 (1st)
TSL Rank: Sticky Bandits 25th – Unit Ha Ha 33rd
Past Games: Sticky Bandits 51-18
Line: Sticky Bandits (-10)

 

Sticky limped to the finish line like no other team did this season, and what was once a promising season early on now has a few question marks. But that’s for next week. They played Unit Ha Ha very recently and absolutely torched them. HAHA doesn’t have the horses to keep up on offense or defense, but it was still a good first season for them. STICKY BANDITS BY 17

 

#4 WHAT A DUMP (3-4-1) VS #5 FRODO SWAGGINS (3-4-1)
PF: What a Dump 27.75 (6th) – Frodo Swaggins 35.57 (4th)
PA: What a Dump 29.25 (3rd) – Frodo Swaggins 32.71 (4th)
SOS: What a Dump .500 (4th) – Frodo Swaggins .429 (6th)
TSL Rank: What a Dump 29th – Frodo Swaggins 30th
Past Games: What a Dump 28-27 | Tie 22-22
Line: Frodo Swaggins (-2)

These two teams meet for the third time this season, where we’ve already seen a 1 point win for WAD and a tie. This is shaping up to be quite a matchup that has Game of the Day potential. Perhaps overtime is on the way this time? FRODO SWAGGINS BY 1

 

D2

Contenders:

Jabronies — 3-1
Passing While Intoxicated — 3-1
The Malones — 5-1

Can’t Touch This:

Can’t Touch This — 9-1

Pretenders:

Scared Hitless — 48-1
Grey Hair – Don’t Care — 100-1

Times Won In 10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations:

Jabronies — 3,508
Passing While Intoxicated — 3,417
The Malones — 1,150
Can’t Touch This — 989
Scared Hitless — 246
Grey Hair - Don’t Care — 690

The Story: The rise of the new contenders is the biggest theme of D2 as The Jabronies added some real firepower and PWI got such a face lift that you can’t fully recognize them anymore. Both of these teams are quite on fire, and with that they earned the byes, leaving the usual suspects (The Malones, Can’t Touch This) in the dust. Scared Hitless and Grey Hair are a little behind the pack, but what we’re getting is a pretty interesting 4 team playoff with a potentially spry 5th that COULD do some damage if things go right. 

 

#3 THE MALONES (5-3-0) VS #6 GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE (0-8-0)
PF: The Malones 37.50 (2nd) – Grey Hair - Don’t Care 21.12 (6th)
PA: The Malones 34.12 (4th) – Grey Hair - Don’t Care 39.25 (6th)
SOS: The Malones .547 (2nd) – Grey Hair - Don’t Care .594 (1st)
TSL Rank: The Malones 19th – Grey Hair - Don’t Care 47th
Past Games: The Malones 39-29
Line: The Malones (-11)

The Malones did everything they could to not get a bye week, and they achieved that goal over the last few weeks of the season, losing enough games to let PWI slide on through to the bye. Perhaps they just wanted to play more football? GHDC might have won more simulations than Scared Hitless, yet have way worse odds, but it just doesn’t matter here. They’ve been running for the bus just to get to the offseason for a couple of weeks now. THE MALONES BY 13

 

#4 CAN’T TOUCH THIS (4-4-0) VS #5 SCARED HITLESS (3-5-0)
PF: Can’t Touch This 34.50 (4th) – Scared Hitless 29.75 (5th)
PA: Can’t Touch This 25.88 (1st) – Scared Hitless 39.00 (5th)
SOS: Can’t Touch This .438 (5th) – Scared Hitless .469 (4th)
TSL Rank: Can’t Touch This 23rd – Scared Hitless 38th
Past Games: Scared Hitless 25-19 | Can’t Touch This 44-6
Line: Can’t Touch This (-9)

 

Scared Hitless feels like they’re THIS close to popping off, but they really haven’t hit their potential yet this season. If anything, they’re planting seeds for the Spring. Can’t Touch This went from top favorites to afterthoughts after a rough start to the season, but since then they’ve found their, ahem, touch. Top defense in the division and peaking at the right time? Hmm. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 14

 

D3

 

Contenders:

Wanderers — 3-1
Bullet Club — 4-1
Interdimensional Lightning Falcons — 7-1
Cunning Stunts — 7-1
D-Generation X Y and Z — 11-1
Buffalo Vice — 18-1
Practice Squad — 20-1

 

GirthQuakes:

GirthQuakes — 131-1

 

Times Won In 10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations:

Wanderers — 3,590
Bullet Club — 2,716
Cunning Stunts — 1,455
Interdimensional Lightning Falcons — 1,210
D-Generation X Y and Z — 709
Buffalo Vice — 574
Practice Squad — 399
GirthQuakes — 347

 

The Story: There isn’t a name on this list that would shock the TSL to its foundation if they were named D3 champions. Except the GirthQuakes. But then again, their only win is against the Wanderers. So who knows anything? Bullet Club is a #2 seed with a negative point differential, ILF has fit right in in D3, the Stunts just score a crap ton of points, DXYZ has that veteran savvy, Buffalo Vice has boom or bust potential, and Practice Squad has Playoff B. Good luck trying to figure this one out. 

 

#1 WANDERERS (6-2-0) VS #8 GIRTHQUAKES (1-7-0)
PF: Wanderers 40.88 (2nd) – GirthQuakes 22.00 (8th)
PA: Wanderers 34.75 (5th) – GirthQuakes 39.38 (8th)
SOS: Wanderers .484 (5th) – GirthQuakes .562 (1st)
TSL Rank: Wanderers 10th – GirthQuakes 45th
Past Games: GirthQuakes 35-33
Line: Wanderers (-12)

You’re reading that correctly, the GirthQuakes actually beat the Wanderers this season. They struggle on offense, and on defense, but for some reason they can give the Wanderers a tough matchup. However, this feels more like an anomaly than anything, and now they don’t have the element of surprise this time. The Wanderers will be ready for them. Right? WANDERERS BY 3

 

#2 BULLET CLUB (5-3-0) VS #7 PRACTICE SQUAD (3-5-0)
PF: Bullet Club 28.62 (6th) – Practice Squad 25.38 (7th)
PA: Bullet Club 30.88 (3rd) – Practice Squad 32.38 (4th)
SOS: Bullet Club .469 (7th) – Practice Squad .516 (3rd)
TSL Rank: Bullet Club 13th – Practice Squad 36th
Past Games: Practice Squad 23-14
Line: Bullet Club (-2)

Practice Squad took care of business against Bullet Club not too long ago, and NOW they get Playoff B throwing for them? Seems unfair, but it just feels like we’re going to have a very close game, and Bullet Club is 5-0 in one score games. They have a slightly better offense and defense, which is why they’re favored, but this game should be a pick ‘em. I expect a close game. BULLET CLUB BY 2

 

#3 INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS (5-3-0) VS #6 BUFFALO VICE (3-5-0)
PF: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 32.50 (5th) – Buffalo Vice 37.50 (3rd)
PA: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 26.50 (2nd) – Buffalo Vice 36.62 (6th)
SOS: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons .438 (8th) – Buffalo Vice .531 (2nd)
TSL Rank: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 16th – Buffalo Vice 31st
Past Games: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 34-30
Line: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (-3)

Buffalo Vice comes in as a spry #6 seed, and they may be a bit better than their record reflects. They can score in bunches, and have talent all over the field. ILF came into D3 with a decent start and while the 5-3 record is impressive, they also had the advantage of getting the GQs twice. If you remove those two games, they’re averaging a negative PD as well. If Andy Clark is on… BUFFALO VICE BY 3

#4 CUNNING STUNTS (5-3-0) VS #5 D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (4-4-0)
PF: Cunning Stunts 44.88 (1st) – D-Generation X Y and Z 32.62 (4th)
PA: Cunning Stunts 37.75 (7th) – D-Generation X Y and Z 26.12 (1st)
SOS: Cunning Stunts .516 (3rd) – D-Generation X Y and Z .484 (5th)
TSL Rank: Cunning Stunts 18th – D-Generation X Y and Z 24th
Past Games: Cunning Stunts 52-47
Line: EVEN

The best offense in the division takes on the best defense in the division in a classic 4-5 matchup. Granted, defense didn’t matter in the 99 points they combined for in their meeting this year. The Stunts pretty much need one stop to win this one, but there’s no guarantee they can get it. DXYZ has the ability to pull this one out, but there’s no guarantee they can do it. Go watch this one if you’re at the fields. CUNNING STUNTS BY 4

 

D4

Contenders:

Two Tuddies — 2-1

Puckett All-Stars — 4-1

Just On the Outside:

PowerPuff Girls — 8-1
Mike’s Detailing — 10-1

Pretenders:

Ready to Retire — 15-1
Come from Behind — 29-1
Cobblestone — 93-1

Times Won In 10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations:

Two Tuddies — 5,245
Puckett All-Stars — 2,268
PowerPuff Girls — 883
Mike’s Detailing — 729
Ready to Retire — 469
Come from Behind — 294
Cobblestone — 112

 

The Story: The Two Tuddies sold their souls or something to absolutely dominate this season. Or everything went their way. They have a VERY game Puckett All-Stars nipping at their heels, and in the playoffs they tend to go up another level. The PPGs had a rough go of it, but word is that was “we didn’t have Kyle a lot” related. Mike’s Detailing looms as a threat as well, while Ready To Retire, Come From Behind, and Cobblestone all had seasons to forget. 

 

#2 PUCKETT ALL-STARS (6-2-0) VS #7 COBBLESTONE (0-8-0)
PF: Puckett All-Stars 27.00 (4th) – Cobblestone 19.43 (7th)
PA: Puckett All-Stars 20.50 (2nd) – Cobblestone 38.57 (7th)
SOS: Puckett All-Stars .531 (3rd) – Cobblestone .643 (1st)
TSL Rank: Puckett All-Stars 9th – Cobblestone 48th
Past Games: Puckett All-Stars 34-12
Line: Puckett All-Stars (-13)

The Cobblestone reunion didn’t go too well this year. Although they DID have players for every game, so that's an improvement? Puckett’s return to being All-Stars went a lot better as they’ve played really, really well this season. There’s not much to really discuss here otherwise. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 23

 

#3 POWERPUFF GIRLS (5-3-0) VS #6 COME FROM BEHIND (1-7-0)
PF: PowerPuff Girls 26.00 (5th) – Come from Behind 20.75 (6th)
PA: PowerPuff Girls 27.14 (4th) – Come from Behind 35.00 (6th)
SOS: PowerPuff Girls .482 (5th) – Come from Behind .547 (2nd)
TSL Rank: PowerPuff Girls 21st – Come from Behind 43rd
Past Games: PowerPuff Girls 26-6
Line: PowerPuff Girls (-7)

Something wasn’t clicking for the PPGs when they tend to be a ridiculously talented squad. Unsure if the buzzsaw lost it’s bite, or they’ve just been sharpening it for the playoffs. Like most teams, they’re a different squad without their QB, and getting him back for the playoffs against a team that is without their own gorgeous haired, rocket-armed QB this season is a recipe for disaster for CFB. POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 18

 

#4 MIKE’S DETAILING (4-4-0) VS #5 READY TO RETIRE (4-4-0)
PF: Mike’s Detailing 32.62 (2nd) – Ready to Retire 28.00 (3rd)
PA: Mike’s Detailing 29.12 (5th) – Ready to Retire 27.12 (3rd)
SOS: Mike’s Detailing .484 (4th) – Ready to Retire .469 (6th)
TSL Rank: Mike’s Detailing 22nd – Ready to Retire 26th
Past Games: Mike’s Detailing 45-6
Line: Mike’s Detailing (-1)

Mike’s Detailing is on the outside looking in for the championship here, and they get the hardest matchup for any potential contender because of it. Ready To Retire isn’t a bad team, at all. They’re pretty good on both sides of the ball, but they don’t FEEL like they have the 3rd best offense and defense in the division. At the end of the day, that 45-6 score looms large in my mind. MIKE’S DETAILING BY 6

D5

 

Contenders:

Balls Deep — 2-1
Blitzkrieg — 4-1
Bridget & Quit It — 5-1
Not So Sticky — 9-1

A Little Spicy:

Stir the Sauce — 15-1

Pretenders:

Pit Harade — 21-1
Sausage McMuffins — 41-1
Mo’ Chicken — 203-1

Times Won In 10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations:

Balls Deep — 5,140
Blitzkrieg — 1,985
Bridget & Quit It — 1,451
Not So Sticky — 722
Stir the Sauce — 367
Pit Harade — 192
Sausage McMuffins — 115
Mo’ Chicken — 28

The Story: Balls Deep showed up and showed out, being the best team in D5 from start to finish. D4 is in their future regardless, but they’re pretty big favorites to win D5 here. Blitzkrieg (Fall Version) is putting up points like they usually do, but their defense has been suspect, and that can only lead to disappointment. Bridget & Quit It started off pretty hot but they’ve slowed a little the last couple of weeks. Not So Sticky is also there, doing what they always do. Stir The Sauce is kind of stuck in the middle on their own, not too good, not too bad. Pit Harade has been improving as the season has gone on, while the McMuffins have gone the other way. Mo’ Chicken is around too. 

 

#1 BALLS DEEP (7-1-0) VS #8 MO’ CHICKEN (0-7-1)
PF: Balls Deep 39.38 (1st) – Mo’ Chicken 13.00 (8th)
PA: Balls Deep 18.00 (1st) – Mo’ Chicken 32.00 (8th)
SOS: Balls Deep .469 (6th) – Mo’ Chicken .531 (1st)
TSL Rank: Balls Deep 5th – Mo’ Chicken 46th
Past Games: Balls Deep 44-6
Line: Balls Deep (-20)

Balls Deep is the best at everything in the division, Mo’ Chicken is the worst at everything in the division. What else is there to say? BALLS DEEP BY 24

 

#2 BLITZKRIEG (5-3-0) VS #7 SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS (2-5-1)
PF: Blitzkrieg 33.88 (2nd) – Sausage McMuffins 20.50 (6th)
PA: Blitzkrieg 31.50 (7th) – Sausage McMuffins 29.00 (6th)
SOS: Blitzkrieg .531 (1st) – Sausage McMuffins .469 (6th)
TSL Rank: Blitzkrieg 14th – Sausage McMuffins 40th
Past Games: Blitzkrieg 45-35
Line: Blitzkrieg (-5)

I simply do not understand why these two teams simply can not quit each other. Even in a down year for SMM, they still played BK to a 1 score game. Blitzkrieg’s defense DOES help teams stay in games, but I’m not entirely sure that the McMuffins can score nearly enough to keep pace, similar to the regular season meeting. It would be amazing if SMM can win, but this isn’t the Spring. FALL BLITZKRIEG BY 14

 

#3 BRIDGET & QUIT IT (5-3-0) VS #6 PIT HARADE (3-5-0)
PF: Bridget & Quit It 31.38 (3rd) – Pit Harade 20.88 (5th)
PA: Bridget & Quit It 22.25 (3rd) – Pit Harade 26.62 (5th)
SOS: Bridget & Quit It .484 (5th) – Pit Harade .531 (1st)
TSL Rank: Bridget & Quit It 15th – Pit Harade 35th
Past Games: Bridget & Quit It 45-22
Line: Bridget & Quit It (-7)

BQUIT took the league by storm a little bit, as the spunky, cannon armed lady came out firing and dicing up defenses. It doesn’t hurt that she’s coached by one of the best QB’s of all time either, and his knowledge in general can help the squad in all D5 scenarios pretty easily. Bobby does give them the mental advantage in any game. PH got together and absorbed some of Vaspian’s finest, but it took a couple of weeks to get it on the same page. They’ve improved every week, as shown by last week’s win over NSS. There’s also rumors Bridget won’t make the game, which changes things no matter what. BRIDGET & QUIT IT BY 7 IF SHE SHOWS, PIT HARADE BY 10 IF SHE DOESN’T.

#4 NOT SO STICKY (5-3-0) VS #5 STIR THE SAUCE (4-4-0)
PF: Not So Sticky 25.88 (4th) – Stir the Sauce 19.25 (7th)
PA: Not So Sticky 20.25 (2nd) – Stir the Sauce 24.50 (4th)
SOS: Not So Sticky .469 (6th) – Stir the Sauce .516 (4th)
TSL Rank: Not So Sticky 17th – Stir the Sauce 28th
Past Games: Stir the Sauce 26-21
Line: Not So Sticky (-5)

Stir The Sauce does hold a win over NSS, but that may have been the highlight of their season. Seriously, that was the most points they scored all year, and their overall lack of an offense will be their downfall. Not So Sticky has three losses this season. Losing to Bridget? Okay makes sense. But STS and Pit Harade show they’re a little inconsistent to say the least. But I can’t imagine them losing to STS twice. NOT SO STICKY BY 7

 

D6

Contenders:

Flying Balls — 2-1
The Chargers — 2-1
Blue Ballers — 4-1

Pretenders Tier 1:

Irish Giants — 23-1
Intentional Clowning — 54-1

Pretenders Tier 2:

TMA — 269-1
Select — 269-1

Pretenders Tier 3:

Sticky Laces — 624-1
Raw Milkers — 832-1
Three Tuddies — 908-1
Four Tuddies — 3332-1
Puck Bunnies — ∞-1

 

Times Won In 10,000 B’s Brother Madden Simulations:

Flying Balls — 4,047
The Chargers — 3,372
Blue Ballers — 1,842
Irish Giants — 444
Intentional Clowning — 183
TMA — 36
Select — 29
Raw Milkers — 14
Sticky Laces — 17
Three Tuddies — 13
Four Tuddies — 2
Puck Bunnies — 1

The Story: 12 teams of mayhem was the goal, and that’s what we got from D6 this season. We’ve had two teams in The Chargers and the Flying Balls both show up and dominate this season. The Blue Ballers and the Irish Giants both had really good seasons, even if they’re a bit overshadowed. And then you can just throw the rest of the teams in a blender because that’s essentially what D6 was this season, and it was wild. 

 

#5 INTENTIONAL CLOWNING (5-3-0) VS #12 PUCK BUNNIES (0-8-0)
PF: Intentional Clowning 28.25 (4th) – Puck Bunnies 17.50 (11th)
PA: Intentional Clowning 26.25 (6th) – Puck Bunnies 40.25 (12th)
SOS: Intentional Clowning .500 (5th) – Puck Bunnies .484 (10th)
TSL Rank: Intentional Clowning 20th – Puck Bunnies 49th
Past Games: Intentional Clowning 34-0
Line: Intentional Clowning (-12)

Despite the Puck Bunnies being a feel good story of an all female team, there’s a lot of work to be done with them. Intentional Clowning has been steady all season, there’s next to no chance of an upset here. INTENTIONAL CLOWNING BY 27

 

#6 TMA (4-4-0) VS #11 STICKY LACES (2-6-0)
PF: TMA 24.75 (7th) – Sticky Laces 21.38 (8th)
PA: TMA 28.12 (8th) – Sticky Laces 27.38 (7th)
SOS: TMA .547 (1st) – Sticky Laces .406 (12th)
TSL Rank: TMA 27th – Sticky Laces 42nd
Past Games: TMA 42-27
Line: TMA (-1)

TMA ended up the 6th seed after a .500 season, but this is where the SOS really comes into play here. TMA played the hardest schedule in D6 this year, which actually means something in this division. It should prove helpful in the playoffs. Sticky Laces has seemed to kind of cruise along this year. They actually have had the easiest D6 schedule, and they were only 2-6. Yikes. TMA BY 13

 

#7 THREE TUDDIES (3-5-0) VS #10 RAW MILKERS (2-6-0)
PF: Three Tuddies 19.00 (9th) – Raw Milkers 27.12 (5th)
PA: Three Tuddies 30.88 (9th) – Raw Milkers 36.25 (11th)
SOS: Three Tuddies .531 (2nd) – Raw Milkers .531 (2nd)
TSL Rank: Three Tuddies 32nd – Raw Milkers 41st
Past Games: —
Line: Raw Milkers (-1)

These two teams didn’t meet this season, and they’re similar in a lot of ways. They both had hellacious schedules, and as a result they struggled a bit. However, the Raw Milkers have a better offense than the 3Tuds and that’s going to propel them to victory. RAW MILKERS BY 3

 

#8 SELECT (3-5-0) VS #9 FOUR TUDDIES (3-5-0)
PF: Select 18.38 (10th) – Four Tuddies 14.62 (12th)
PA: Select 23.12 (4th) – Four Tuddies 31.75 (10th)
SOS: Select .500 (5th) – Four Tuddies .484 (10th)
TSL Rank: Select 34th – Four Tuddies 39th
Past Games: —
Line: Select (-6)

It’s astounding that the 4Tudz won 3 games the season averaging just over FOURTEEN points. The Flying Balls just scored 14 points in the time it took you to read that sentence. Select struggles a bit on offense themselves, but they have a lock down defense that may pitch a shutout this week. SELECT BY 6

 

ROUND 2! 

(I’ll be using my predictions here, of course)

#1 THE CHARGERS (7-1-0) VS #10 RAW MILKERS (2-6-0)
PF: The Chargers 41.38 (3rd) – Raw Milkers 27.12 (5th)
PA: The Chargers 19.62 (2nd) – Raw Milkers 36.25 (11th)
SOS: The Chargers .500 (5th) – Raw Milkers .531 (2nd)
Past Games: The Chargers 49–35
Line: The Chargers (-15)

The Raw Milkers are really going to have a great time in the 10 minutes between winning their first game and this game starting. After that? Pain. THE CHARGERS BY 20

 

#2 FLYING BALLS (7-1-0) VS #8 SELECT (3-5-0)
PF: Flying Balls 45.12 (1st) – Select 18.38 (10th)
PA: Flying Balls 18.50 (1st) – Select 23.12 (4th)
SOS: Flying Balls .516 (4th) – Select .500 (5th)
Past Games: Flying Balls 37–20
Line: Flying Balls (-16)

Select did okay slowing the Flying Balls down in the regular season, as they “only” scored 37 points. I like Select a lot, but this is just the FB’s are too damn good. FLYING BALLS BY 17

 

#3 BLUE BALLERS (6-2-0) VS #6 TMA (4-4-0)
PF: Blue Ballers 44.62 (2nd) – TMA 24.75 (7th)
PA: Blue Ballers 26.12 (5th) – TMA 28.12 (8th)
SOS: Blue Ballers .500 (5th) – TMA .547 (1st)
Past Games: Blue Ballers 50–8
Line: Blue Ballers (-11)

 

The Blue Ballers feel like the little brother of The Chargers and Flying Balls right now, but that’s still impressive to be listed with them. This team can SCORE with anyone, they just have more trouble stopping them than the others do. They didn’t have much trouble with TMA last time, but I expect TMA to give them a much closer game this time. I think if TMA didn’t just play a game before coming to this track meet, I’d be tempted to take them. But they did, so. BLUE BALLERS BY 9

 

#4 IRISH GIANTS (6-2-0) VS #5 INTENTIONAL CLOWNING (5-3-0)
PF: Irish Giants 26.00 (6th) – Intentional Clowning 28.25 (4th)
PA: Irish Giants 19.88 (3rd) – Intentional Clowning 26.25 (6th)
SOS: Irish Giants .500 (5th) – Intentional Clowning .500 (5th)
Past Games: Irish Giants 36–29
Line: Irish Giants (-2)

 

The Irish Giants had a great season and they were rewarded with a bye, now they get IC in a playoff game where it’s going to be a dogfight. IC does a little better job of scoring, but the Giants’ defense is allowing less than 20 points a game. Expect them to get some stops to make the difference. IRISH GIANTS BY 3

 

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

• What are the Sportsbook odds for these games? I want to bet on them with my friends! 

 

Legends vs Freeballers — ML: Legends -950 / Freeballers +950 — O/U 63
Eyes Downtown vs Mavericks — ML: Eyes Downtown -400 / Mavericks +400 — O/U 66
Sticky Bandits vs Unit Ha Ha — ML: Sticky Bandits -375 / Unit Ha Ha +375 — O/U 69
Frodo Swaggins vs What a Dump — ML: Frodo Swaggins -120 / What a Dump +120 — O/U 63

The Malones vs Grey Hair – Don’t Care — ML: Malones -420 / GHDC +420 — O/U 66
Can’t Touch This vs Scared Hitless — ML: CTT -340 / Scared Hitless +340 — O/U 65

Wanderers vs GirthQuakes — ML: Wanderers -500 / GirthQuakes +500 — O/U 69
Bullet Club vs Practice Squad — ML: Bullet Club -130 / Practice Squad +130 — O/U 59
Interdimensional Lightning Falcons vs Buffalo Vice — ML: ILF -145 / Buffalo Vice +145 — O/U 67
Cunning Stunts vs D-Generation X Y and Z — ML: Even (–110 each) — O/U 71

Puckett All-Stars vs Cobblestone — ML: Puckett -560 / Cobblestone +560 — O/U 53
PowerPuff Girls vs Come from Behind — ML: PowerPuff -240 / CFB +240 — O/U 54
Mike’s Detailing vs Ready to Retire — ML: Mike’s Detailing -115 / RTR +115 — O/U 58

Balls Deep vs Mo’ Chicken — ML: Balls Deep -1400 / Mo’ Chicken +1400 — O/U 51
Blitzkrieg vs Sausage McMuffins — ML: Blitzkrieg -190 / Sausage McMuffins +190 — O/U 61
Bridget & Quit It vs Pit Harade — ML: BQI -250 / Pit Harade +250 — O/U 58
Not So Sticky vs Stir the Sauce — ML: NSS -185 / Stir the Sauce +185 — O/U 45

Intentional Clowning vs Puck Bunnies — ML: IC -500 / Puck Bunnies +500 — O/U 55
TMA vs Sticky Laces — ML: TMA -115 / Sticky Laces +115 — O/U 51
Three Tuddies vs Raw Milkers — ML: Raw Milkers -115 / Three Tuddies +115 — O/U 56
Select vs Four Tuddies — ML: Select -210 / Four Tuddies +210 — O/U 38

There’s going to be some high scoring games this week. 

 

• Which underdogs have the best chance to win this week in each division? What A Dump, Scared Hitless, Practice Squad, Ready To Retire, Pit Harade, Raw Milkers.

 

 

 

• Rank the #1 seeds in order from least to most vulnerable in the playoffs. 

 

Balls Deep - Legends - Two Tuddies - Jabronies - The Chargers (just because of the Flying Balls) - Wanderers. 

 

 

• If no #1 seeds win their division’s championship, who do you predict the winners will be? Sticky Bandits, Can’t Touch This, Cunning Stunts, PowerPuff Girls, Not So Sticky, Flying Balls. Flying Balls feels like cheating, so, Blue Ballers. 

 

 

 

• Who is coming into the playoffs hot? Who is cold? Besides the obvious ones? What A Dump, PWI, Cunning Stunts are all hot right now. Sticky Bandits, The Malones, and the PowerPuff Girls aren’t the best right now. 

 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR PLAYOFF SATURDAY

 

• Almost like clockwork, after an entire season of baking in the sun, you’re looking at a rainy, 60 degree day tomorrow. Adjust those game plans. 

 

 

 

• Double check to see what colors your opponent is wearing, if you’re the worse seed, bring an alternate color. 

 

 

 

• The refs are chomping at the bit to throw you out of a game if you’re being a jerk. So DON’T BE JERKS TO THE REFS. 

 

 

 

• Games of the Day: 

• 10:00 - Can’t Touch This vs Scared Hitless

• 11:00 - Bullet Club vs Practice Squad

• 12:00 - What A Dump vs Frodo Swaggins

• 1:00 - TMA vs Sticky Laces

• 2:00 - Irish Giants vs Intentional Clowning (probably?)

• The Banquet is coming! We’re headed back to the Lafayette on Dec 5th for the best party around! Here's a link to sign up! Fall 2025 Banquet Registration - Google Forms

 

 

 

•  Winter session is coming back to Sportsplex in just a few short months!  An "official" announcement is coming this weekend, but I like to break the news here first.  Here's a link to sign up today: Winter 2026 - Team Registration Form - Google Forms

 

 

 

• Please be on time for your games. In fact, be early. With the potential for overtime games pushing certain fields back, it can only cause chaos for the D6 games later on in the day. 

 

 

 

• If you want to make some money on a long shot bet, you can parlay both The Chargers and Flying Balls to lose. It’s a +7800 parlay. It’s basically throwing money away though. 

 

 

 

• Maybe the GirthQuakes will upset the Wanderers? Hmm. 

 

 

 

• You’ve waited all season to get to this point. Immortality is within reach. Go hard, push yourself, and put it all on the line for your teammates. If you don’t, why are you even here? Good luck, TSLers. 

 

 

-GF OUT

WEEK 7 THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 26 September 2025 22:12

Published: Friday, 26 September 2025 22:12

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 1178

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, it seems like we’re shaping up to have quite the end of the season here. Two weeks remain in the Fall 2025 season, and if last week taught us anything, it’s that we can still be surprised. Look what happened just last week:

 

-Mavericks get a huge win over Sticky Bandits

-The Chargers lost!

-Jabronies become D2 favorites in a win over The Malones

-PowerPuff Girls continue to lose

-DXYZ shuts out ILF

 

That's just a small snapshot of what happened last week. The point is that you never know what you’re going to get on any weekend of TSL football. Well, except that Legends will win. That seems to be the only safe bet on the season right about now. We’ve talked about it many times before, the start of the season can get your squad going on the right foot, but more often than not it’s all about how you end the season that matters more. Here’s a current look at the hottest teams in the league right now: 

 

Legends (D1)

Undefeated this year, including wins over Sticky Bandits and Eyes Downtown last week. Their defense is suffocating, and they look like the clear D1 favorite heading into the final stretch.

Jabronies (D2)

Back-to-back statement wins, including handing The Malones their first loss. They’ve vaulted into the #1 seed conversation and are peaking at the perfect time.

Blitzkrieg (D5)

Winners of four straight and averaging nearly 40 points per game during that span. They’ve gone from “kind of on the outside” to “legit contender” in a hurry.

 

And here’s our current coldest teams:

 

Sticky Bandits (D1)

After a hot start, they’re 0-3 over their last three and just dropped two in a row, including one to the Mavericks. Their point differential has dipped and their grip on the #2 seed is slipping.

PowerPuff Girls (D4)

Three straight losses have them falling out of top-seed contention. They need to stop the bleeding fast if they have dreams of going back to back. 

Sausage McMuffins (D5)

Lost 4 straight, and are giving up 35 points per game in that stretch. The dreams of contending for the title are long gone for them this season, hopefully they figure it out in the winter. 

D1

 

LAST WEEK’S SCORES

 

Mavericks 43, Sticky Bandits 37
Legends 46, Eyes Downtown 32
Legends 38, Sticky Bandits 24
Eyes Downtown 38, Freeballers 15

 

The Mavericks get a signature win of sorts, taking out the Sticky Bandits. Legends go 2-0 on the day, also taking out Sticky, and adding Eyes Downtown to the mix. ED would go on to beat the Freeballers.

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

STICKY BANDITS VS UNIT HA HA (+10) - HAHA looks to take advantage of the Bandits’ slide, but it feels more like it's time for Sticky Nation to right the ship. STICKY BANDITS BY 2

EYES DOWNTOWN VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+7) - Frodo may not have taken a leap this season like we all thought, but that doesn’t mean they’re not improving. The problem is that Eyes Downtown looks really good as they prepare for the playoffs. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 10

MAVERICKS VS WHAT A DUMP (EVEN) - These two teams seem earmarked for a Playoff Saturday showdown, but after the Mavs beat Sticky, both teams could have their eyes on moving up in the standings. Both seem to be stepping up at the right time, and this could be the best game of the day. MAVERICKS BY 1

LEGENDS VS FREEBALLERS (+21) - Yeah. This might be hard to watch. LEGENDS BY 17

WHAT A DUMP VS FREEBALLERS (+9) - Freeballers have a better shot at winning this game of course, but again WAD has been playing better as of late. WHAT A DUMP BY 13

D2

 

LAST WEEK’S SCORES

 

Can’t Touch This 43, Grey Hair Don’t Care 6
Jabronies 37, The Malones 34
Passing While Intoxicated 53, Scared Hitless 44

 

Can’t Touch This finally woke up a bit, getting a nice win over GHDC, the Jabronies won a fantastic game over The Malones, and PWI continues to solve the very solvable Scared Hitless defense, moving to 3-2 on the season. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

SCARED HITLESS VS GREY HAIR – DON’T CARE (+6) - If Grey Hair is going to get a win this season, this would have to be the game. Scared Hitless can’t stop a beach ball, but their offense should be enough to outlast Grey Hair. SCARED HITLESS BY 8

THE MALONES VS PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED (+4) - The first game of the terrible schedule luck for PWI as they get a HELL of a day this Saturday. A Malones team that just lost their first game is going to be very, very ready to get back in the win column. THE MALONES BY 9

JABRONIES VS PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED (+3) - It doesn’t get much better for PWI as they get to battle the Jabronies in the second game, fresh off their big win last weekend. They can’t afford to lose this game going into the final week. JABRONIES BY 2

D3

 

LAST WEEK’S SCORES

 

Wanderers 35, Bullet Club 20
D-Generation X Y and Z 30, Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 0
Buffalo Vice 42, GirthQuakes 29
Cunning Stunts 43, Practice Squad 24

 

The Wanderers handle Bullet Club, DXYZ makes easy work of ILF, Buffalo Vice outlasts the Girthquakes, and the Stunts nearly double up on Practice Squad. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

BULLET CLUB VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+7) - Practice Squad isn’t having the best of seasons, but they’re the definition of “always dangerous”. Bullet Club is 4-2, but they actually have a negative point differential. They have 4 one score wins, and have lost by 20 and 15. Perhaps their record is a bit lucky? PRACTICE SQUAD BY 1

WANDERERS VS BUFFALO VICE (+5) - It’s Buffalo Vice’s turn at the Wanderers, and they aren’t as far off as one might think. Vice scores just slightly less and allow just slightly more than the Wanderers do, so they’re going to give them a game. WANDERERS BY 2

D-GENERATION X Y AND Z VS GIRTHQUAKES (+9) - After DXYZ’s demolition of ILF, they now get a Girthquakes squad looking for (another) big upset. The GQs are hard to handle if you sleep on them, but most teams have learned not to do that. D-GENERATION X, Y, AND Z BY 14

D4

 

LAST WEEK’S SCORES

 

Two Tuddies 51, Come from Behind 12
Mike’s Detailing 45, Ready to Retire 6
Puckett All-Stars 31, PowerPuff Girls 17

 

The Two Tuddies continue to cruise, beating Come From Behind. Mike’s Detailing beats up on Ready To Retire to remind everyone that they’re a part of this championship picture as well, and Puckett pulls ahead as the clear #2 in the division, taking down the Powerpuff Girls. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

POWERPUFF GIRLS VS COBBLESTONE (+8) - Okay, if the PPGs lose this one, they should be in full blown panic mode. The PPGs are only averaging 20 points a game, which is causing them the biggest issues as they still play pretty well on defense. Cobblestone, however, does not. POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 12

MIKE’S DETAILING VS COME FROM BEHIND (+7) - Mike’s Detailing put up 45 points and they’re looking poised to take a run at the D4 title, even if they have a little work to do. However, they also have 3 more games to really dial things in, and a game against a Paul-less CFB should help. It hasn’t been the easiest season on the CFB side of things, but you can never fully count them out. MIKE’S DETAILING BY 14

TWO TUDDIES VS PUCKETT ALL-STARS (+6) - There’s a bye in D4. Right now, the Two Tuddies hold that position. A win here guarantees that they’ll be able to avoid the first round. A Puckett win, however, puts both of these teams at 5-1, and they’ll have a win each in the head to head series, making next week HUGE for them both. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 2

D5

 

LAST WEEK’S SCORES

 

Balls Deep 30, Stir the Sauce 6
Blitzkrieg 45, Sausage McMuffins 35
Bridget & Quit It 45, Pit Harade 22
Not So Sticky 38, Mo’ Chicken 12

 

The line between the “haves” and the “have nots” continues to grow. Balls Deep makes easy work of STS, Blitzkrieg holds off the McMuffins, BQUIT takes care of Pit Harade,and NSS has no issue with Mo Chicken. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

BRIDGET & QUIT IT VS SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS (+10) - BQUIT continues to impress this season as they try their best to avoid slipping into the 4v5 first round playoff matchup with either STS or NSS. Getting the McMuffins who as we know aren’t having the best of times should still have that working well. BRIDGET & QUIT IT BY 13

 

PIT HARADE VS MO’ CHICKEN (+3) - Pit Harade can’t quite improve their standings placement much over the rest of the season, but they can continue to get on the same page before the playoffs. A loss to winless MO could probably damage any confidence grown over the season. It’s been rough for Mo’ Chicken, but this is their best shot at a win, so expect them to go hard for it. PIT HARADE BY 10

 

BALLS DEEP VS NOT SO STICKY (+8) - Balls Deep keeps scoring and they’ve yet to allow 100 points on the season. They’re tearing up D5 to where they need to consider D4 in the spring regardless of how the playoffs go. Not So Sticky will present them with a challenge, but I’m not sure they’ll be able to slow the offense down enough to pull off the win. BALLS DEEP BY 8

D6

 

LAST WEEK’S SCORES

 

Three Tuddies 28, Puck Bunnies 8
Flying Balls 42, Intentional Clowning 0
TMA 24, Irish Giants 18
Irish Giants 25, The Chargers 18
Select 25, Sticky Laces 24
Blue Ballers 48, Four Tuddies 6

Three Tuddies got in the win column, beating the Puck Bunnies while the Flying Balls continued to thrive, shutting out IC. TMA beat the Irish Giants, who then decided to shock the world and take down The Chargers. Select slipped by the Sticky Laces for another win, and then the Blue Ballers just trounced the 4Tudz by 42. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

TMA VS INTENTIONAL CLOWNING (+2) - The final bye is still up for grabs and both of these teams need this win. A loss by Clowning probably takes them out of the running, while a TMA loss definitely hurts them. Both teams are pretty similar, so this should be a good one. TMA BY 1

THE CHARGERS VS PUCK BUNNIES (+20) - The Chargers lost last week, but apparently didn’t have most of their team, which explains that. The Puck Bunnies lost last week, and did have most of their team, which explains that. This might be one to not look at directly. THE CHARGERS BY 24

STICKY LACES VS RAW MILKERS (+4) - The Raw Milkers return after two weeks off, and hopefully that sabbatical helped them remember how to play football. Sticky Laces have had an up and down season, with sadly more downs than they wanted so far. This is a pretty good battle for positioning in the standings. STICKY LACES BY 8

FOUR TUDDIES VS THREE TUDDIES (+1) - The Tuddies Bowl! What a matchup here. While the Four Tuddies have more wins, the Three Tuddies have a statistically better offense and defense. This one should be fun. THREE TUDDIES BY 1

FLYING BALLS VS FOUR TUDDIES (+21) - And then the Four Tuddies get to play the Flying Balls, who are still just whipping everyone. FLYING BALLS BY 27

BLUE BALLERS VS SELECT (+3) - Select has a sneaky good defense, and with the Blue Ballers coming to throw bombs, they’re going to get tested. Big time. They may slow them a little bit, but I don’t know if they can score enough to stick with them. BLUE BALLERS BY 13

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• WHAT TEAM IS NOBODY THINKING OF AS A CONTENDER RIGHT NOW AND WHY SHOULD THEY BE ONE? Actually, it’s Select. They’re averaging 18.8 points against on defense. They held the Flying Balls to “only” 37 points. And in their 3 losses? They’ve lost by 4 (Irish Giants) and by 6 (TMA). So there’s a world where they’re 5-1 and have only lost to the Flying Balls. 

 

 

 

• WHO HAS THE MOST ONE SCORE WINS AND WHO HAS THE MOST ONE SCORE LOSSES? A pretty good indicator of good luck/bad luck/no luck, it seems that a few teams have had a decent amount of close games this season. 

 

 

Best One Score Games Records:

 

Bullet Club (D3): 4–0
Puckett All-Stars (D4): 2–0
Two Tuddies (D4): 2–0
TMA (D6): 2–0

 

Worst One Score Games Records: 

 

Grey Hair – Don’t Care (D2): 0–3
Can’t Touch This (D2): 0–3
Ready to Retire (D4): 0–3
Sticky Laces (D6): 0–3
Puck Bunnies (D6): 0–3

 

 

• ARE THE JABRONIES THE NEW FAVORITES TO WIN D2 OR WILL THE MALONES BOUNCE BACK? Can’t it be both? I think it’s fair to call these two Co-Favorites at this point. I’d say they’re going to meet in the finals, but Can’t Touch This still exists and they’re looking better and better. 

• WHO ARE YOUR CURRENT TITLE FAVORITES AS WE GET CLOSER TO THE RACE FOR SOCIAL CO-ED TOUCH FOOTBALL IMMORTALITY? Going in order of D1-D6: Legends, The Malones, Wanderers, Puckett All-Stars, Blitzkrieg, and The Chargers. 

 

 

• WHO HAS THE HIGHEST AND LOWEST SCORING GAMES ON AVERAGE THIS SEASON? Ooh this could be fun. Let’s see here. 

 

Highest Scoring: 

	Cunning Stunts	D3	81.2
	Buffalo Vice	D3	72.0
	Flying Balls	D6	70.3
	Legends	D1	62.8
	Blue Ballers	D6	62.5

Lowest Scoring: 

	TMA	D6	33.5
	Ready to Retire	D4	42.0
	Mo’ Chicken	D5	42.7
	Select	D6	44.4
	Cobblestone	D4	46.3

I’m not entirely sure what all of this tells us, but it’s pretty interesting to see some of these numbers. I never realized just how low scoring TMA games are. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• Buffalo weather is looking to be 78 degrees and another perfect day for football, which can only mean the playoffs will be decided in a snow tornado. 

 

 

 

• Games of the Day: 

• 10:00 - Wanderers vs Buffalo Vice

• 11:00 - Three Tuddies vs Four Tuddies

• 12:00 - The Malones vs PWI

• 1:00 - Two Tuddies vs Puckett All-Stars

• 2:00 - Balls Deep vs Not So Sticky

 

 

 

• I was told that Garrett is having a dart tournament after the games this week, so stick around after the games and participate! 

 

 

 

• Every game in D6 matters somehow in terms of seeding, playoff byes, just everything. 12 teams is chaos, but it’s also a lot of fun to watch. Maybe not to play in. 

 

 

 

• Three playoff dark horses: Mavericks, Buffalo Vice, and Mike’s Detailing. Watch. 

 

 

 

• If you have anything more to add to your team and how they’re viewed, you can always email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. today! 

 

 

 

• Teams, please bring an alternate color to your games (white usually works well here) in an effort to stop having teams wearing the same exact colors during games. Have your captain double check what color your opponents are going to be. Make things easier for everyone. 

 

 

 

• Remember that refs are doing you the favor of refereeing your games, and if we have any hope of encouraging new people to help out, having you scream at them about every play isn’t the way to do it. No ref has ever changed their mind because the red-faced, spittle flying, lunatic said they should. 

 

 

 

• Seriously, what’s wrong with the Powerpuff Girls? 

 

 

 

• Reminder not to bring any outside alcohol to the fields. It’s not worth getting caught and suspended over, and potentially ruining your team’s playoff chances. Don’t put the league in that position. 

 

 

-GF OUT