PLAYOFF THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 18 October 2024 18:13

Published: Friday, 18 October 2024 18:13

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 95

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, congratulations. You’ve made it guys. This Saturday, October 19th, in the Year of Our Lord 2024, at 9:00 am Eastern Standard Time, with the weather projected to be a sunny, 69 degrees fahrenheit with a slight breeze coming from the southwest, the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality will officially begin. 

 

That’s right, after two grueling months of arguing referees, battling each other, battling yourself (“Am I not good enough anymore? Was I ever?” No Scott, you weren’t.), begging people (mostly females) to sub for your team, being annoyed that your game was at the one time you didn’t need it to be even though you got the schedule a month and a half ago and you didn’t check it so you made plans with Bobby, Jimmy, and Sue to go play pickleball and you got guilted into playing football anyway so you were whiny at the fields and left right away, rescheduling games, turning your ankle on Field 5, being annoyed because you got that one ref who just isn’t going to take venmo for their fees even though its 2024 and they need to get out of the stone age, wearing similar colors as your opponents and neither team has an extra color (even though all teams should be prepared, they just never are because 72% of TSL captains are butt cheeks when it comes to this stuff) so you just deal with it and your QB has an off game because of it and you’re still surprised they were “that bad” today, being incredibly disappointed in a teammate or two because they bailed on the game at 10am on Saturday so you can’t get a sub for them, doing shots at the bar, sprinting off the fields during a random downpour you weren’t quite ready for, telling yourself and your team after a 20 point loss “yeah, but when we have our whole team actually here, I’m not worried about them, we’ll win by two scores”, and of course, actually playing football games, you come to realize that none of that actually mattered and the ONLY thing that matters for the TSL Fall 2024 season (besides the friends and memories we made along the way) are the next two weeks, not the last two months. 

 

On this glorious weekend, 43 of the TSL’s 51 teams (3 D1 teams have a bye, 2 D2 teams have a bye, 2 Breakfast Club teams already lost, and Straw Hats are a bunch of quitters) will travel down to the Lenny Alba Fields at The Rose Garden at the Angry Buffalo to do battle for the honor of being called a TSL Champion. It’s the hardest thing to do, even in this age of people playing on multiple teams and teams stacking rosters worse than ever. (I’ve gotten multiple emails from ‘old timer’ TSLers about this pandemic that’s ruining the league. The league seems pretty strong to me.) It takes just about everything to go right for a team to navigate themselves through this Immortality Tournament, where one wrong step can not only cause you to slip on the field, it can be what slips your team from a championship. 

 

TSL Playoff Saturday is one of the best sports days of the year. It’s a day that is always ripe with upsets, and VERY RARELY does the day go “chalk”. #1 seeds are routinely upset by #8 seeds (or #9 seeds!). And the same goes for the rest of the ‘top’ teams. Playoff Saturday is where perfect seasons go to die, and when the dust clears on this season it shows me that only TWO teams ended the year undefeated - Wet Bandits in D1, Cunning Stunts in D4. Joey Batts is dominating the league at such an alarming rate that Chris Cole, Matty Ice, Ricky Austin, Taylor Seketurski, and Dean Thompson all took a trip to Germany to get those blood replacement treatments (Dean was fine, he was just there for support) that they used to give Kobe Bryant (See: legal HGH) so they can all come back to throw and defeat him. It’s basically the TSL’s Avengers taking on a tiny Thanos. Yes, I’m aware that there were better “former QBs” to throw into this joke, but you can’t have an Avengers full of Captain Americas. Sometimes you just need a Hawkeye. Either way, 9-0 doesn’t matter this week. At this point, everyone starts back at 0-0. Every team has a chance that by 3pm on Saturday, October 26th, they too can be immortal. 

 

Is it going to be you? 

 

(Disclaimer: As usual, the lines are given to me by the TSL Official Odds Committee in Las Vegas, The “TSL Rank” is based off a league wide overall ranking using very specific qualifications that Topper came up with on a wine bender 15 years ago and can’t remember what they are. Of course we still just go with it. The PF/PA rankings are within the division, not the league. The “Last 3” is a team’s record in the final three weeks of the season (some played only 2 games, others played 4, the rest had 3), to show who’s coming in “hot” and who’s coming in “not”.)

D1

 

The Contenders

 

Wet Bandits (2-1)

Eyes Downtown (3-1)

 

The “Probably are contenders but something feels off and they just lost to Grey Hair Don’t Care but they get respect since they won the title last season” sort of Contenders

 

Sticky Bandits (6-1)

The Pretenders That Didn’t Get A Bye

 

Frodo Swaggins (10-1)

Freeballers (100-1)

The Story: The Wet Bandits Revenge Tour has been so far so good as they’ve dominated the TSL’s top division this year. They feel like they’ve hit an extra gear this time around. Eyes Downtown didn’t have the best season in the Spring (Bobby playing Breakfast Club ruined his pre-game routine of running around and stretching for two hours before every game) but after a slow start, Eyes Downtown has been GOOD once again. They’ve won 8 in a row. Look out. Sticky gets the “post title hangover” pretty badly it seems, as they just have not been themselves this time around. Most of this can be blamed on Jeff Krol’s poor preparation for each game, as Travis diabolically gave up running the sublist so that Jeff would have even MORE on his plate (running the league, being a new dad, moving, being way less cool than his wife, etc) and it seems to have worked. Frodo is out there winning games and they’ve had their best run in D1, but they’re JUSTTTT outside of being able to beat the top squads. Freeballers get a joke 100-1 odds (it’s more like 125-1) but after a not great start to the season they ended up 3-6, which was pretty impressive, but to see them have to beat Frodo, Wet Bandits and then one of ED/Sticky in a row doesn’t feel like it’s in the cards this year. 

Bye Weeks: Wet Bandits, Eyes Downtown, Sticky Bandits

#4 Frodo Swaggins (4-4-1) vs #5 Freeballers (3-6) 

 

PF: Frodo 35.11 (3rd) - FB 28.89 (5th)

PA: Frodo 31.56 (3rd) - FB 35.78 (5th)

TSL Rank: Frodo 26th, FB 36th

Last 3: Frodo 1-1, FB 2-2

Past Games: 46-21 Frodo

Line: Frodo Swaggins (-10)

 

The Freeballers have nothing to be ashamed of for having the guts to go up to D1, knowing that they’d be losing arguably the best player in the TSL in Sean, since he was already on the Wet Bandits. They picked it up during the season, and you just KNOW they’re going to come back in the Spring with some great Free Agent pickup along the way. They’re essentially where Frodo was a few seasons ago. Frodo continues to grow, and after some roster changes, Garrett is back to being a pretty damn good QB. Frodo is just a few steps ahead on the path to D1 contenders. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 13

D2

 

The Contenders

 

The Malones (3-1)

Can’t Touch This (4-1)

Mavericks (6-1)

 

The “Don’t You Dare Sleep On Us” Pretenders

 

Grey Hair Don’t Care (8-1)

Scared Hitless (8-1)

The Untouchaballs (10-1)

 

The Story: The entire division got some stiff competition from the D1 teams they got to play this season, and along the way we sort of forgot how D2 played out. The “contenders” all went some version of 4-1 or 3-1 in just D2 games, while the “pretenders” were all 1-3 or 1-4. There’s a clear divide, which can only mean that two of the “pretenders” will meet for the D2 title, probably. But not really. The Malones came into D2 with a ton of fanfare and a little bit of “I thought they were going straight to D1?”. It’s weird to see them have a losing record, but going 0-4 in the crossover games will do that. That means, you guessed it, they were 4-1 in D2, and they ended up with the best point differential in the D2 games. Just when you thought they were dead, here they are. Can’t Touch This and the Mavericks both have had really good seasons, with some signature wins along the way. Both teams would easily compete in D1, but this is about D2. They earned the bye weeks, and in a division like this, a bye week is a big advantage. Grey Hair closed the season on a nice little run, getting a win over Sticky on top of it. They’re gaining some momentum. Scared Hitless was a 2-7 team that could’ve been what? 5-4, easily? When I say that whatever happened for the last two months doesn’t matter and that everyone is 0-0, they’re the type of team I’m talking about. Bad luck during the season, but that luck can change during the playoffs in an instant. The Untouchaballs are a surprisingly bad 1-8 team that just might have said “We don’t care about the regular season, it’s whatever, we’re going to kick ass in the playoffs”. A 1-8 team winning a championship would be huge TSL news…anywhere else. If this team did it? Wouldn’t surprise anyone. 

#3 The Malones (4-5) vs #6 The Untouchaballs (1-8)

 

PF: Malones 39.11 (1st) - UT 19.22 (6th)

PA: Malones 35.44 (4th) - UT 39.78 (6th)

TSL Rank: Malones 27th, UT 49th

Last 3: Malones 2-1, UT 0-3

Past Games: 36-13 The Malones

Line: The Malones (-13)

 

The Malones are the 3 seed, but they’re the betting favorites to win it all. What a weird world we live in here. We know their story at this point. Potent offense that when they’re on, they’re ON. Defense could use a little work, but realistically their best defense is their offense. Fantastic males and females. Just a great team that’s been getting better. The Untouchaballs, of course, have Jeremy F’n Burr at QB. They have a team that’s won this whole thing before. They’re the “total package” usually, but this just doesn’t feel like it’s their year. THE MALONES BY 14

#4 Grey Hair Don’t Care (3-6-1) vs #5 Scared Hitless (2-7)

 

PF: GHDC 26.20 (5th) - SH 28.75 (4th)

PA: GHDC 32.60 (2nd) - SH 35.63 (5th)

TSL Rank: GHDC 29th, SH 46th

Last 3: GHDC 2-1, SH 0-3

Past Games: 36-10, GHDC

Line: EVEN

 

Yes, GHDC just beat Scared Hitless 36-10 a week ago, but I’m going to assume Fall Fest ruined that for SH anyway. That’s not to take away from the great games GHDC had last week (They beat Sticky 36-21 in a crossover game too), but the averages from the entire season suggest these two teams are much closer than that. This is going to be one of those “whichever team blinks first” games, I can feel it. Scared Hitless feels due for a big win, and while Eickhoff really plays well in the playoffs, Scared Hitless historically ramps it up as a team when the games matter the most. SCARED HITLESS BY 1

D3

 

The Contenders

 

Wanderers (3-1)

Practice Squad (4-1)

Mix’n It Up (5-1)

Let’s Get Reccked (5-1)

Jabronies (7-1)

Bullet Club (7-1)

The Pretenders

 

Buffalo Vice (12-1)

Passing While Intoxicated (12-1)

Topper’s All-Stars & Todd (14-1)

The Story: The story remains the same as it always does. Every team is insanely close, D3 has the best division top to bottom, and literally anyone can win. D3 could have Seeds 1-4 playing next week, but it could also have seeds 5-7 and 9 playing as well. It’s TSL football at its finest. The Wanderers roll in as the favorites, but they do that often and have yet to have anything to show for it. Practice Squad started out 5-0 before they started losing,but they got a big win over Mix’n It up to right the ship before the playoffs. And we all know about “Playoff B”, so the Squad figures to get a nice boost. Mix’n It Up hasn’t had the best offense, but it's their suffocating defense that wins games for them usually. Let’s Get Reccked is right where they always are: in the middle of the contenders, but they leave you feeling like they should’ve won another two games along the way. Jabronies ended up in the 3rd seed overall after an up and down season, but they feel a little out of place with the top teams. Bullet Club had a much better season than last year, and they’re 5-2 after going 0-2 in Week 1, which cost them in these close standings. PWI took their lumps this season after moving up, but they still have solid girls and a good QB, so they’re going to be fine in the future. Buffalo Vice has a ‘not great’ defense, and while they’re 3-6, 2 of those wins were by forfeit, so it’s harder to gauge exactly how good they are. TAST brings up the rear this season, but they had two forfeit losses, and early season roster struggles (mainly with QB subs) didn’t tell the entire story of the team. The only time they really had their entire squad was the one point loss against Mix, and if I recall, they got robbed and should’ve won that game. Plus, Topper is back throwing now. Our first ever TSL #9 seeded champion is in play. 

#8 Buffalo Vice (3-6) vs #9 Topper’s All Stars & Todd (1-8)

 

PF: Vice 32.29 (4th) - TAST 17.67 (9th)

PA: Vice 37.86 (9th) - TAST 35.67 (8th)

TSL Rank: Vice 35th, TAST 48th

Last 3: Vice 1-3, TAST 0-3

Past Games: 21-0 Vice (Forfeit)

Line: Vice (-3) 

 

For an 8-9 “play-in” game, this one actually has a lot of unknowns and intrigue. Buffalo Vice’s Defense isn’t very good, but it SHOULD be okay against TAST’s last place offense. But wait, part of that is because of the QB subs, and not because Topper is back throwing (unless Dubey shows up? QB Controversy!) where he put up 20 points in a loss to Wanderers. Okay, it was only 20 points, but it was the Wanderers in his first game back. Vice isn’t going to give him those types of problems. Vice can score, they always have been able to do that, but if the Aaron/Drew combo plays well, they may be able to hold them. It feels like one team is trending up and the other is trending down. If TAST gets a spy on All-World TSL female Caitlyn Mason, look out Vice. TOPPERS ALL STARS & TODD BY 3

#1 Wanderers (8-1) vs #9 Topper’s All Stars & Todd (1-8)

 

PF: Wanderers 37.50 (1st) - TAST 17.67 (9th)

PA: Wanderers 30.00 (6th) - TAST 35.67 (8th)

TSL Rank: Wanderers 6th, TAST 48th

Last 3: Wanderers 3-0, TAST 0-3

Past Games: 35-20 Wanderers

Line: Wanderers (-12) 

 

The feel good story of TAST looking good more than likely comes to an end here as they get to take on a fresh Wanderers team that didn’t have to play a game already. Not to mention they have the best offense in the division, and despite TAST’s issues on the offensive side of the ball all season, the defense has been mostly them. Wanderers recently won against TAST as well, so the results are fresher than say, a Week 1 win. It’ll be fun, and it’ll be close. WANDERERS BY 2

#2 Mix’n It Up (7-2) vs #7 Passing While Intoxicated (3-6)

 

PF: Mix 28.38 (6th) - PWI 22.67 (8th)

PA: Mix 24.38 (1st) - PWI 30.00 (6th)

TSL Rank: Mix 9th, PWI 32nd

Last 3: Mix 2-2, PWI 1-3
Past Games: 23-6 Mix

Line: Mix’n It Up (-10)

 

Mix’n It Up has the best defense in the division, and it’s a good thing because the offense is leaving something to be desired this season. I don’t think it’s because of Damien regressing at QB or anything like that, I just think that they’ve had some bad luck on offense this year. A smart team full of TSL legends with a bunch of experience tends to do well regardless, especially in the playoffs. And that doesn’t bode well for PWI in their first D3 playoff experience. PWI hasn’t been a “not great underdog” in the playoffs in a long time. And the last time they were? They pulled off some pretty big upsets. We’ve seen teams that have had success struggle mentally when the competition gets harder, but PWI is a team that’s been together long enough that they know how good they can be when they keep their composure. I just think this is a bad matchup for them overall. MIX’N IT UP BY 14

#3 Jabronies (6-3) vs #6 Bullet Club (5-4)

 

PF: Jabronies 27.88 (7th) - BC 28.63 (5th)

PA: Jabronies 24.88 (2nd) - BC 27.25 (3rd)

TSL Rank: Jabronies 10th, BC 23rd

Last 3: Jabronies 3-1, BC 2-0
Past Games: 25-6 Bullet Club

Line: EVEN

 

The Jabronies are an interesting 3rd seed because their offense can’t exactly be classified as “good” when it’s 7th in the division. They’ve scored over 30 points three times - against Vice, against TAST, and then the 42-41 win over Practice Squad. Now they get to go up against Bullet Club, a team that has the 3rd best defense in the division. And since Week 1 where BC got blown out twice (once against the Wanderers, sure, but the other against Vice, yikes), they’re 4-2 (5-2 with the Straw Hats forfeit), the two losses were one score losses against LGR and Mix. They’re averaging only 19.5 points allowed during that span as well. As long as their offense can convert enough times, I think they’re playing better overall. BULLET CLUB BY 4

#4 Practice Squad (6-3) vs #5 Let’s Get Reccked (6-3)

 

PF: PS 36.13 (2nd) - LGR 34.25 (3rd)

PA: PS 28.38 (5th) - LGR 27.63 (4th)

TSL Rank: PS 11th - LGR 13th

Last 3: PS 1-2, LGR 4-0

Past Games: 39-34 Practice Squad

Line: EVEN

 

I want you, dear reader, to know that this game is going to be the best one of the day. It features two teams ranked in the TSL Top 13. Both teams have good offenses and good defenses. They’re very evenly matched, as shown by the quite close 5 point game they played this season. Both teams have usual playoff stories. “Playoff B” has been a real thing for quite some time now, and Practice Squad as a whole ramps their game up in the playoffs. LGR consistently has one of the most talented TSL rosters (relative to division) and they consistently fail to live up to their hype in the playoffs. At the end of the day, (to quote league icon B’s brother) these narratives have to go the other way, right? At the risk of screwing over everyone in D3 because I make B go the next level of super saiyan by saying this, I think both narratives change here. Playoff B loses a bit of his aura, and LGR actually plays to their potential. LET’S GET RECCKED BY 2

D4

 

The Contenders

 

Cunning Stunts (2-1)

 

The “Maybe We Pull This Off” Lesser Contenders

 

Big Daddy Jason & the ILFers (4-1)

GirthQuakes (5-1)

The Herd (7-1)

 

The Pretenders

 

Vaspian (11-1)

Creekers (12-1)

Select (15-1)

Cobblestone (25-1)

 

The Story: The Cunning Stunts ran roughshod over the division, destroying everyone in their path, averaging over 50 points a game, and they looked damn good in doing so. The only issue, of course, is that they’ve done this before, multiple times, and have proceeded to blow it big time when it mattered most. Maybe this team is different? ILF has cruised along as the de facto #2 in this division, as they finally got a QB that matters in Buddy Lee, and it’s paid dividends. However, recent losses to the GirthQuakes and The Herd have pulled them back down to the pack a bit. Speaking of the GQs, they shook off the rust of starting 0-4 (okay, they were 1-4 but got a forfeit win) and turned that into 4 straight dominating victories, and that last loss? A 3 point loss to the Stunts. Hmm. The Herd was another benefactor to getting themselves a new QB. Mark Dalfonso came into the fold and has given this team life. Unfortunately he can’t fix their defense as much as they need. Vaspian showed signs of life throughout the season, and other than the game against the Stunts, and last week’s “I’m pretty sure the team wasn’t there” destruction against GQ, the other losses are one score games. Creekers have been a bit of a disappointment this season, and I don’t think 3-6 was what they expected either. They had some QB and roster issues along the way, but they still had a nice win against The Herd to end the season. Select opened up with two one point wins, and a 5 point loss to the ILFers, and looked to be the party crashers for the top teams. And then they proceeded to lose out for the rest of the season, save for a forfeit win. Cobblestone has been playing a player down for half the season it feels like, but they still go out and compete. They’re a good team when they have enough players, and when you have Darryl Carr QB Superstar throwing, no game is unwinnable. But it’s been a rough season for them this time around. 

#1 Cunning Stunts (9-0) vs #8 Cobblestone (2-7)

 

PF: CS 51.00 (1st) - Cobblestone 19.29 (8th)

PA: CS 30.00 (3rd) - Cobblestone 38.86 (7th)

TSL Rank: CS 1st, Cobblestone 47th

Last 3: CS 3-0, Cobblestone 1-2

Past Games: 54-28 Stunts

Line: Cunning Stunts (-20)

Despite Cobblestone having a clear advantage at the QB position in this one, it’s not going to matter. The Stunts have been so good all year, and they easily dispatched of Cobblestone earlier in the year. The roster is chock full of the best female players in the TSL, and Cobblestone just doesn’t have the horses to run with them this time around. CUNNING STUNTS BY 14

#2 Big Daddy Jason & the ILFers (6-3) vs #7 Select (3-6)

 

PF: ILF 39.56 (2nd) - Select 26.57 (5th)

PA: ILF 28.49 (2nd) - Select 39.43 (8th)

TSL Rank: ILF 12th, Select 33rd

Last 3: ILF 2-2, Select 0-3

Past Games: 44-39 ILF

Line: Big Daddy Jason & the ILFers (-16) 

 

Despite the fact that these two played a 5 point game earlier in the season, and that ILF hasn’t looked THAT good recently, they still have the 2nd best offense AND defense in the division, and both units are light years ahead of Select’s right now. I don’t know if Select was having an issue with people showing up during the losing streak, but at this point one has to think that they’re just not on par with their opponent. BIG DADDY JASON & THE ILFERS BY 10

#3 The Herd (5-4) vs #6 Creekers (3-6)

 

PF: Herd 37.00 (3rd) - Creekers 22.00 (7th)

PA: Herd 38.22 (6th) - Creekers 36.48 (5th)

TSL Rank: Herd 18th, Creekers 31st

Last 3: Herd 1-2, Creekers 2-2

Past Games: 39-38 Creekers

Line: The Herd (-8)

 

Regardless of the fact that the Creekers just pulled off the one point victory last weekend, The Herd finds themselves favored by 8 points anyway. It appears that last week is being considered an anomaly right now, but anyone that’s watched the Creekers over the last few seasons know that THAT is the team that has been winning games (a lot of them in fact) for a while now. If that Creekers offense shows up a second week in a row, and I think it will, they’ll take advantage of a not too great defense. Creekers experience pays off here. CREEKERS BY 3

#4 GirthQuakes (5-4) vs #5 Vaspian (3-6)

 

PF: GQ 36.63 (4th) - Vaspian 25.50 (6th)

PA: GQ 24.00 (1st) - Vaspian 31.88 (4th)

TSL Rank: GQ 21st, Vaspian 30th

Last 3: GQ 4-0, Vaspian 1-3

Past Games: 56-6 GQ

Line: GirthQuakes (-8)

Vaspian started out the season looking very good (as some new players to the roster will do for a team, especially impact ones), but faded a little down the stretch run. Meanwhile, the GirthQuakes figured everything out in a big, big way, becoming one of the TSL’s hottest teams out there. GIRTHQUAKES BY 13

D5

 

The Contenders

 

Come From Behind (3-1)

Power Puff Girls (3-1)

The Kind Of Contenders

 

Two Tuddies (6-1)

Stir The Sauce (7-1)

 

The They’re Not As Good As They Have Been But Could Turn It On Contenders

 

Not So Sticky (10-1)

GUCCI (15-1)

 

The Pretenders

 

Spinelli’s Plumbing (17-1)

Pit Harade (30-1)

The Story: Come From Behind and The Power Puff Girls are wildly out-scoring everyone in the division for the most part. The main difference between the two is that the CFB defense has been absolutely LIGHTS OUT this year as well. The Two Tuddies started the season off pretty well and established themselves as contenders, but a QB injury kind of derailed the season (and didn’t Mike Wolcott get hurt playing for Reset Warriors last season and derailed that season too? Noticing a theme here.) However, their excellent defense has kept them afloat. Stir The Sauce ended the season with a thud, losing games to CFB and PPG in consecutive weeks, which knocked them down a peg from “championship contender’. The talent is there though, and they’ve shown they can surprise come playoff time before. Not So Sticky and GUCCI are similar in that they’re both not having the best of seasons (for them) and with D5 getting stronger overall, other teams really took advantage of that instead of how NSS or GUCCI used to sneak out some wins maybe they shouldn’t have. Not this time around. They’re still dangerous though, that’s for sure. Spinelli’s has a fantastic offense, as predicted. They’re the only “non Power 2” team to average over 30 points a game, but their division worst defense has done them in time and time again. Pit Harade battled through multiple QBs, multiple sub requests, and multiple “off” games that their first season in D5 is mostly one to forget. 

#1 Power Puff Girls (7-2) vs #8 Spinelli’s Plumbing (2-7)

 

PF: PPG 37.78 (1st) - SP 30.11 (3rd)

PA: PPG 26.22 (4th) - SP 35.33 (8th)

TSL Rank: PPG 7th, SP 45th

Last 3: PPG 3-0, SP 1-3

Past Games: 50-38 PPG, 27-25 PPG

Line: Power Puff Girls (-8)

 

A heck of a matchup in round one considering these two teams’ slightly fiery history this season. Spinelli’s lost both games against PPG, but only losing by 2 the second time around should give them some encouragement, even as an 8 seed. The PPG’s are very good, for sure, but they’re not “Stunts-level” dominant, yet. Spinelli’s has the ability to hang with girls in a shootout, but QB Nick Hawes is going to have to be perfect for an upset to happen. The PPGs make you make mistakes. It’ll be a fun one, but POWER PUFF GIRLS BY 8

#2 Come From Behind (7-2) vs #7 Pit Harade (2-7)

 

PF: CFB 37.00 (2nd) - PH 17.00 (8th)

PA: CFB 19.67 (1st) - PH 32.33 (7th)

TSL Rank: CFB 8th, PH 41st

Last 3: CFB 3-0, PH 1-3

Past Games: 34-16 CFB

Line: Come From Behind (-16)

Everyone has heard of CFB’s amazing, timeless QB in Paul Lovullo, who has been fighting retirement rumors for 3 decades, and still has one of the strongest arms in the league. But what they’re forgetting about is how good the defense has been this season. They’re averaging less than 20 points a game, which is impressive. Everything seems to be clicking for CFB this season, and despite some years where that wasn’t enough going into the playoffs, this time it feels like it is. Pit Harade has been rough at times this season, including the loss to CFB. The turnover in the roster each week hasn’t led to anything cohesive on either side of the ball. There is talent on the roster for sure, they just need to put it together. COME FROM BEHIND BY 17

#3 Two Tuddies (6-3) vs #6 GUCCI (3-6)

 

PF: TT 24.78 (5th) - GUCCI 24.33 (6th)

PA: TT 23.67 (2nd) - GUCCI 31.67 (6th)

TSL Rank: TT 14th, GUCCI 38th

Last 3: TT 2-2, GUCCI 1-3

Past Games: 29-16 TT

Line: Two Tuddies (-8)

 

The Tud Buds are back near the top of the standings after a pretty good regular season that saw them dominate at times. Merging with Reset Warriors has proven to be a great move, despite the QB injury. The Tuddies’ defense is very good, and it will keep them in games for sure, regardless of the QB. Having their starter will make all the difference, of course. GUCCI found themselves in a weird position as the 6 seed after a season of tough losses on the field. Bad luck and injuries played a role in this scenario, and I’m unsure if GUCCI is getting healthy for the playoffs or not. If they do, GUCCI is going to give the Tuddies a run for their money. But for now, I think the luck is on the Tuddies’ side. TWO TUDDIES BY 10

#4 Stir The Sauce (5-4) vs #5 Not So Sticky (4-5)

 

PF: STS 29.00 (4th) - NSS 22.11 (7th)

PA: STS 25.11 (3rd) - NSS 28.11 (5th)

TSL Rank: STS 22nd, NSS 28th

Last 3: STS 3-2, NSS 1-2

Past Games: 21-16 STS

Line: Stir The Sauce (-6)

 

Despite the slow end to the season, STS has been a pretty good team. They’ve won big and they’ve won close games. If things start clicking for them again like it did at the end of the last season, they’ll be A-OK. They get a team in Not So Sticky that is usually better than their numbers suggest. We’ve seen it before where NSS has a rough go on offense during the season and then before you know it, POOF, they put up 40 points. I don’t think they’ll get to 40, but I do think they’ll surprise STS a bit. Besides, D5 can’t be chalk, right? NOT SO STICKY BY 3

D6

 

The Contenders

 

Blitzkrieg (2-1)

Sausage McMuffins (5-2)

 

The Just On The Outside Of Being Contenders

 

Day By Day (6-1)

Sticky Laces (8-1)

 

The Pretenders

 

Purple Nurples (12-1)

Balls Deep (12-1)

TMA (20-1)

Dogg Pound (25-1)

The Story: D6 is a battle between Blitzkrieg and Sausage McMuffins, who both have been excellent, and both should be D5 bound next season, regardless of what happens here. They’re head and shoulders above the rest of the division. As for everyone else, Day By Day has had a tough second half of the season, and it seems like something changed along the way. They did beat Blitzkrieg though, so you can’t sleep on them if you’re one of the Big 2. Sticky Laces has figured out a lot of things this season, and while I’m not going out of my way to predict an upset, it’s still great seeing a new team grow in the league. Purple Nurples are the Jekyll and Hyde once again. You never know which of them you’re going to get. Sometimes they score a crap ton of points, sometimes they don’t. Sometimes they play good defense, sometimes they don’t. They’re consistently hard to tell what the hell they’re going to be. Balls Deep shows flashes of promise, but things have gone poorly for the most part for them. TMA has struggled through a season of not really ever having their QB, and the difference between the two versions of the team is crazy. Finally, the Dogg Pound are close, VERY close to breaking through and being a pretty good team. But, just not quite yet. 

#1 Blitzkrieg (8-1) vs #8 Dogg Pound

 

PF: BK 39.33 (1st) - DP 16.22 (8th)

PA: BK 18.44 (2nd) - DP 25.11 (3rd)

TSL Rank: BK 3rd, DP 43rd

Last 3: BK 3-0, DP 1-2

Past Games: 42-6 BK

Line: Blitzkrieg (-17)

Is this the year for Blitzkrieg? Literally everything that can be going right for them has been. They’re beating the crap out of teams, playing tremendous on both sides of the ball, and they have some of the most talented males AND females in the division. It’s a different Blitzkrieg, you can just FEEL it. Dogg Pound? You’re coming along. You’re learning. You’re doing well, and you’re going to be a force in the TSL. Just not this year. BLITZKRIEG BY 20

#2 Sausage McMuffins (8-1) vs #7 TMA (2-7)

 

PF: SMM 35.67 (2nd) - TMA 18.00 (7th)

PA: SMM 16.89 (1st) - TMA 31.56 (7th)

TSL Rank: SMM 4th, TMA 42nd

Last 3: SMM 4-0, TMA 1-3

Past Games: 45-29 SMM, 36-0 SMM

Line: Sausage McMuffins (-16)

Lost in the Blitzkrieg fanfare is that the Sausage McMuffins are just as good. They boast the best defense in the division and the 2nd best defense too. Alex has his team simply cruising, and they’re under the radar somehow? Every player on SMM can beat you if you’re not paying attention. TMA, well, things are better than they were. They have fresh blood coming in, and while most of the struggle has been on the lack of QB Ryan being there, it’s been getting the new people to figure out just how football works that’s been part of the challenge. Hopefully they have the entire team there and make it a game. They DID upset GUCCI as an 8 seed not too long ago. But SMM is just too good. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 13

#3 Sticky Laces (6-3) vs #6 Balls Deep (2-7)

 

PF: SL 23.11 (6th) - BD 24.11 (5th)

PA: SL 28.33 (5th) - BD 31.44 (6th)

TSL Rank: SL 15th, BD 40th

Last 3: SL 3-1, BD 0-4

Past Games: 28-18 SL, 40-23 SL

Line: Sticky Laces (-2)

Sticky Laces is 6-3 is one of more shocking things I’ve had to say this season. They earned it, for sure, but the fact that they still have a negative point differential is crazy to me. They’ve been improving every week, and QB Kyle is coming along as a leader as well. Balls Deep did NOT have the season they were expecting after playing very well a season ago. They’ve hung in there in most of their games, but couldn’t find that extra gear to get a win here or there. They’re better than 2-7 for sure, and they boast a slightly better offense than the Laces too. They’re still the team that was pretty good last season, and I think they’re going to come out and play. BALLS DEEP BY 2

#4 Day By Day (5-4) vs #5 Purple Nurples (4-5)

 

PF: DBD 28.00 (3rd) - PN 27.56 (4th)

PA: DBD 25.67 (4th) - PN 34.56 (8th)

TSL Rank: DBD 24th, PN 37th

Last 3: DBD 1-2, PN 1-2

Past Games: 51-32 PN

Line: Day By Day (-3)

Day By Day established themselves as the best non-top two team in the division and then just seemingly coasted through the rest of the season? Either way, they’ve been a revelation, and when they’re on, look out. The Nurples are, as I’ve said, all over the place. Despite putting up 51 against DBD last time they played, you can’t count on them to do it again. DAY BY DAY BY 10

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• Which #1 seed is most at risk to lose this week? A classic question. Since two of them don’t play, the answer becomes a bit easier to get to with less options. The Stunts and Blitzkrieg feel VERY safe, and the Wanderers get the advantage of playing a team that just played a play in game. That leaves the Power Puff Girls, who get a Spinelli’s team that just barely lost to them a couple of weeks ago. They’re the most likely to lose #1 seed. 

 

 

 

• Did the D1/D2 Crossover Series work? I’ve said this before, but yes. Despite D1 winning the series with an 18-5-2 record, The Mavericks, Can’t Touch This, and The Malones all would’ve finished higher than D1 teams had we just combined the standings. I think it was great for the league. 

 

 

 

• The seeds are set, who’s winning the titles? At first glance? Wet Bandits, Can’t Touch This, Practice Squad, Cunning Stunts, Come From Behind, and Blitzkrieg. 

 

 

 

• Who are your best “long shots” in each division? Sticky Bandits (I’m pretending they count), The Untouchaballs (Jeremy Burr baby), Jabronies (Joe Miano is still underrated after a decade), Vaspian (They have the talent on the roster), GUCCI (Maybe they’ll find their form), and Purple Nurples (if they’re ‘on’ for two weeks, they could put up 150+ points in 3 games and win)

 

 

 

• What’s the best story line going into the playoffs? Joey Batts trying to go undefeated in two divisions is a big one. Blitzkrieg going HARD for their first ever title that’s eluded them is another. Those are easily my top 2. 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• “Now stop. Take a breath. Again, realize this is ALL FOR FUN. Some of you just read this and are gnashing your teeth I didn't give you enough "props" in this piece. A handful of you "get" it and will joke with me about this when you see me Saturday. Others of you will play it off, but keep it in the back of your mind all season and throw any win by your team and a loss by another in my face as though I care about anything other than having fun.” – Rameer AKA “THE BUILD”

 

 

Just giving you some words of wisdom from an old friend as you head into battle this weekend. 

 

• I don’t care if it’s the playoffs, treat the refs with RESPECT and don’t yell and scream at them. They’re being told to kick out anyone who’s being a jerk. Don’t screw up your team’s season by being that person. 

 

 

 

• Breakfast Club Predictions: 

• Steph Infection 45, Carlyac Arrest 31

• Dri Girls One Cup 36, D’s Nutz 35

 

 

 

• Games of the Day: 

• 10:00 - Stir The Sauce vs Not So Sticky 

• 11:00 - Grey Hair Don’t Care vs Scared Hitless

• 12;00 - Practice Squad vs Let’s Get Reccked

• 1:00 - Two Tuddies vs GUCCI

• 2:00 - The Herd vs Creekers

 

 

 

• THE TSL BANQUET IS OFFICIALLY OFFICIAL. IT WILL BE FRIDAY, DECEMBER 13TH 2024 AT THE MARRIOTT BUFFALO NIAGARA HOTEL, 1340 MILLERSPORT HWY, BUFFALO NY, 14221. HERE’S THE LINK: 

 

 

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1MvDCK_qsTQdRv1rx6lU9IVVLAdldLsGwlZDZZMSdTBY/edit

 

REGISTER NOW!!!!

 

 

• The Awards Nominations Sheet is ACTIVE. Click the link below so that you can nominate your favorite TSLers who are deserving of the awards this season. The awards will be handed out at the banquet! Here’s the link for that: 

 

 

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1EvE2dgxslCyzp413m3FTk1gNF_3GJT3SUCyA_Or_hWg/edit

 

Nominate your heart out! 

 

• And while it isn’t quite time yet, Jeff has told me that there WILL be a link to register for our winter session very, very soon, so look for that email from him in the coming days? Weeks? I don’t know that answer. 

 

 

 

• PLEASE BE EARLY TO YOUR GAMES. There’s always a chance other games go to overtime, etc, and that will put that field behind schedule (or put your game on Field 5, which we’ve avoided for this round of games!) so if fields are already behind and then an OT game happens? It’s going to be a wait we’d all like to avoid. 

 

 

 

• Three more upsets to look for: Select, The Untouchaballs, and Topper’s All-Stars & Todd. That’s right, two bottom seeds with the upsets! LET’S GO! 

 

 

 

• That’s all. The Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality is finally here! This is everything you’ve worked for. Go out and have fun, like Rameer said, but make sure you give it your all. And pay attention to who you’re playing, in case you wear the same color. A good rule of thumb is to let the higher seeded team keep the color. Unless they have cool, matching jerseys, then you can just wear a different shirt. It’s not that serious. Good luck to all of you! 

 

-GF OUT. 

WEEK 7 THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 04 October 2024 14:53

Published: Friday, 04 October 2024 14:53

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 117

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, the Fall 2024 Season is inching closer and closer to the start of the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality. As the calendar turns to October, the TSL season has reached its penultimate (someone explain to Klussman what that means, please) week of games as teams continue to round into form and show you who they really are. 

 

It’s been said many times that in the TSL, it’s not how you start, it's how you finish, and that a team that’s heating up today tends to steal the headlines in a couple of weeks. On the other hand, a team with a hot start that is starting to cool off looks to be fodder for the usual Playoff Saturday upsets. Who looks to be the potential party crashers? Who looks to be headed for the potential “I can’t believe they’re not playing on Championship Saturday!” list? Let’s take a look. 

 

D1

 

Heating Up - Eyes Downtown just keeps winning and rounding into form. 

 

Cooling Off - Frodo Swaggins is 3-3-1 and a recent tie with D2 Grey Hair suggests that with an 0-2 record in D1 games, and a 3-1-1 record in Crossovers, perhaps Frodo is still just a pretty good D2 team moonlighting in D1. 

 

D2

 

Heating Up - Nobody. The Mavericks and Can’t Touch This have been hot all season, and the rest of D2 has a record of 1-13-1 combined over the last few weeks. 

 

Cooling Off - The Untouchaballs. They’re 0-5 over the last few weeks. Yes, OH AND FIVE. 

 

D3

 

Heating Up - Jabronies. They haven’t lost in a few games and they’ve been playing very, very well. 

 

Cooling Off - Practice Squad. Started off 5-0, now they’ve lost their last 3 games and the mojo is off. On the plus side for the Squad, the losses were all close (6 to Wanderers, 1 to Jabronies, 2 to Bullet Club), but these are the close games they had been winning before. 

 

D4

 

Heating Up - Cobblestone. Now that the roster is sort of showing up and things are settled, they’ve won their last 2 games, and they’re looking like their old selves. 

 

Cooling Off - Select. After the hot start and calls for “I can’t believe that guy is allowed to be in D4” cries from opponents, they’re 0-3, the offense is sputtering, and they’re not going to be the “Giant Killers” D4 needs. 

 

D5

 

Heating Up - Pit Harade. Started the season 0-3 and looking completely out of place, they’re now 2-1, and they were leading in the loss against CFB as well. Amazing what can happen for a team when players show up. 

 

Cooling Off - GUCCI. Arguably the award winners for the “Season From Hell”, GUCCI is 2-5 overall, and on a 3 game losing streak. Not the expected results we had for Kelly Kane and company. 

 

D6

 

Heating Up - Dogg Pound. Yeah, you read that right. In their last 5 games, the Pound is 2-3, but ignoring a 42-6 drubbing by Blitzkrieg, they lost to Day By Day by 1 point and they lost to Sticky Laces by 2, because they always lose to Sticky Laces by 2. There’s a world where they're 4-1 in those games right now. 

 

Cooling Off - Day By Day. A loss to Balls Deep and then getting beaten up by the McMuffins shows that maybe, just maybe, they’re not who we thought they were. 

And now let’s get to the games. 

 

D1/D2

 

Last Week’s Games

 

D1

 

Eyes Downtown 45, Freeballers 30

 

D1/D2 Crossover Corner

 

Sticky Bandits 36, The Untouchaballs 28

Wet Bandits 45, The Malones 38

 

D1 leads the Crossover Series 13-4-1

 

D2

 

Mavericks 20, Grey Hair Don’t Care 18

Can’t Touch This 21, Scared Hitless 0 (forfeit)

 

Eyes Downtown continues to cruise, mowing down the Freeballers better than the Rose Garden mows the fields. Both teams of Bandits got wins in the Crossover games, both games were one score games however. Scared Hitless was scared of Can’t Touch This, forfeiting, while the Mavericks score a shockingly low 20 points as they squeak out a win over Grey Hair. 

 

This Week’s Games

 

D1

 

Eyes Downtown vs Sticky Bandits (EVEN) - Now we’re talking. Sticky’s light early season schedule gets them a heck of a stretch run, and it starts with Eyes Downtown. This game is incredibly important because the winner will keep themselves in the running for the #1 seed. If Eyes Downtown wins, they have a shot at the #1 seed if the Wet Bandits go 0-2 this week. Highly unlikely. But, a Sticky win means that their next game essentially is for the #1 seed. This means much more to Sticky Nation. STICKY BANDITS BY 2

 

Wet Bandits vs Sticky Bandits (+6) - The Battle of Kevin McAllister finally takes place this season, as the Bandits square off against the Bandits. If Sticky wins against Eyes Downtown, they get tasked with beating the Wet Bandits on the same day. The Fanduel odds for that are +350, for what it’s worth. This game could be for the #1 seed, assuming that both teams win out (Wet Bandits have Scared Hitless, Sticky has Grey Hair and Frodo, so it's very plausible).  It’s amazing that despite the Wet Bandits’ dominance all year, they could still miss out on the bye week. They won’t. WET BANDITS BY 10

 

Frodo Swaggins vs Freeballers (+6) - Frodo hasn’t been great, but the Freeballers haven’t even been a football team at times this season, but lately they’ve been more competitive. Both teams could use the positive momentum heading into the playoffs, and I think one team wants it more than the other. FREEBALLERS BY 3

 

D1/D2 Crossover Corner

 

Eyes Downtown vs Can’t Touch This (+7) - Eyes Downtown have themselves a pretty fun double header, and honestly I’m looking forward to this game more than the game against Sticky. Can’t Touch This has been in the “maybe they should be playing in the D1 playoffs instead” category all year, and for good reason. They’re 4-2, but they’re 1-1 in crossover games, losing to Frodo by 5, and beating the Sticky Bandits. A win over Eyes Downtown would be HUGE. But not today. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 8

 

Wet Bandits vs Scared Hitless (+7) - The Wet Bandits are going to take on Scared Hitless in a crossover game, which means Scared Hitless is going to have to play without Travis, which hurts them in every category except “Average Team Handsomeness”. Wet Bandits usually win by two scores, Scared Hitless usually loses by two points, so split the difference. WET BANDITS BY 9

 

Mavericks vs Freeballers (+6) - Yes, the D1 team is getting points. The Mavericks have some unfinished business with the Freeballers from last season, and I have a feeling team Cotton Candy is going to dump 40+ points this week. MAVERICKS BY 13

 

D2

 

Can’t Touch This vs The Untouchaballs (+10) - I might be signing D2’s death certificate by telling Jeremy Burr he’s the Cooling Off team, and that he’s a double digit underdog against the D2 co-favorites, and that they’re going to lose. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 8

 

Mavericks vs The Untouchaballs (+10) - Twice. MAVERICKS BY 8

 

D3

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Jabronies 42, Practice Squad 41

Jabronies 22, Passing While Intoxicated 17

Bullet Club 25, Practice Squad 23

Let’s Get Reccked 36, Mix’n It Up 14

Buffalo Vice 21, Topper’s All-Stars & Todd 0 (forfeit)

Wanderers 21, Straw Hats 0 (forfeit)

 

The Jabronies get two big wins to go to 2-0 on the day, taking out PWI and Practice Squad. The Squad would drop to 0-2 on the day, losing to Bullet Club soon after. And Let’s Get Reccked got a big statement win over Mix’n It Up, further proving that you could play the D3 playoffs 10 times and get 10 different results. Buffalo Vice got a forfeit win over Team Topper and the Wanderers got their league mandated forfeit win over the Straw Hats. 

This Week’s Games

 

Jabronies vs Mix’n It Up (EVEN) - Big, big game here in D3. The Mix loss to LGR has left the #1 seed open, which while it doesn’t have the advantage of a bye week, it does give a team the advantage in that you play the winner of the 8/9 game, so they’re a little tired heading into it. Mix had what can only be considered a hiccup in a good season, but the Jabronies’ wins were a good sign, right? On the one hand they beat the reigning D4 champions, and a previously hot Practice Squad team. On the other, they beat a struggling future 8 seed, and a team that might end the season on an 0-4 run. MIX’N IT UP BY 7

 

Buffalo Vice vs Passing While Intoxicated (+8) - If PWI is going to “show they belong” a little better here in D3, beating former D4 foe Buffalo Vice is a good start. Vice has just been cruising along at a .500 pace, but they show flashes of being very good, it all depends on who shows up. As for PWI, I don’t think they expected to be 2-4 at this point. They have an above average QB, and a good group of females that are solid across the board. The males leave a little to be desired. In D3, you need a standout female and/or male (besides the QB) to really make it all work. Right now, they don’t have that, and it shows. BUFFALO VICE BY 8

 

Mix’n It Up vs Passing While Intoxicated (+12) - Two teams probably on a collision course for a future first round playoff matchup, there’s a noticable difference between how these two have been playing all season. MIX’N IT UP BY 10

 

Let’s Get Reccked vs Buffalo Vice (+7) – Let’s Get Reccked finally gave us the performance we’d been expecting from them all season, in a thorough waxing of Mix. They feel a bit “on the rise” as well (I almost picked them in the beginning of this article), and they’re getting a Vice team that hasn’t kicked it into a higher gear just yet. LET’S GET RECCKED BY 9

 

Wanderers vs Topper’s All Stars & Todd (+10) - TAST is on the edge of breaking out, but it just hasn’t happened yet. That’s not to say it won’t though, as we all know, anything can happen in D3. While it’s hard to fathom it happening here, I would’ve said the same when they played Mix two weeks ago, and almost (should’ve) won. Expect a close one. WANDERERS BY 3

 

D4

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Cunning Stunts 46, Creekers 20

ILF 44, Vaspian 34

GirthQuakes 35, ILF 29

Cobblestone 22, Vaspian 14

Cunning Stunts 61, Select 39

The Cunning Stunts continue their drive to perfection, as they go to 2-0 on the day with wins over Creekers and Select. ILF gets a win over Vaspian before dropping a game to the GirthQuakes in a surprising upset. Vaspian would go to 0-2 on the day as they went on to lose to Cobblestone as well. 

This Week’s Games

 

Select vs Creekers (+7) - Neither team is going into this game happy with their season. These teams have 3 non-forfeit wins between them: all of them are 1 point wins. We’re THIS close to having both of these teams at a combined 1-11 in actual games. Both of these teams need a win, badly. SELECT BY 1

ILF vs Cobblestone (+10) - ILF dropped a game to the GQs last week that probably doesn’t change anything for them. They’re still the clear “non-Stunts” favorite, but perhaps the gap between the Stunts and everyone else is larger than we realized. Cobblestone has been playing well since things settled for them a bit, so look for them to give ILF a game, but not actually win. ILF BY 8

GirthQuakes vs Select (+3) - Earlier we spoke on how Select and Creekers had 3 1 point wins between them. Two of those wins were against the GirthQuakes, who were THIS close to a 4-2 record and being the darlings of D4 (just kidding, that’s The Herd regardless). The GQs have played well in every single game they’ve played, (they only lost to the Stunts by 3 for example) and everyone is coming along nicely. GIRTHQUAKES BY 8

Cunning Stunts vs The Herd (+16) - The Herd are in the midst of a 4 game win streak, averaging a 43.75 - 29.25 victory during it. The steadiness that having a QB like Dalfonso brings is immeasurable to a young team. And while things are going good, they get the Stunts again. The Stunts won 52-24 in Week 1 as The Herd was figuring out a lot of things. I’m not saying they’re going to beat the Stunts, they won’t, but I do think they’ll improve upon the last game’s outcome. CUNNING STUNTS BY 13

D5

 

Last Week’s Games

 

PowerPuff Girls 27, Spinelli’s Plumbing 25

Stir The Sauce 31, GUCCI 16

Pit Harade 32, GUCCI 28

Stir The Sauce 21, Not So Sticky 16

Come From Behind 30, Two Tuddies 6

 

The Power Puff Girls summoned the power of league legends last week as they powered through a close game with Spinelli’s. Stir The Sauce returned after a week off to go 2-0 with wins against GUCCI and Not So Sticky. Things didn’t get better for GUCCI who went 0-2 on the day after a loss to Pit Harade as well. And in other news, Come From Behind beat up on the Tuddies. 

This Week’s Games

 

PowerPuff Girls vs Pit Harade (+16) - Just as Pit Harade seems to be righting the ship, they get a unique challenge in the pretty “on fire” PPGs. The Girls are first in the division, and they lead D5 in scoring as well. Fitting a theme, they’re two 1 point losses away from 7-0. It’s a tough challenge for anyone, let alone a new team (in the division) finding their way. POWER PUFF GIRLS BY 17

Two Tuddies vs Spinelli’s Plumbing (+6) - The Tud Buds are slowing down after a hot start, although a QB injury has played into that a bit. We know what Spinelli’s is, and can be. If they click on offense, they’re putting up 40+ easy, but they’ve struggled to click most of the year. It’s understandable after all that time off though. But if the Tuddies still don’t have a QB, it might not matter. SPINELLI’S PLUMBING BY 3

Not So Sticky vs Two Tuddies (EVEN) - The friendly rivalry continues, but it sort of comes back to what I said above. No QB for the Tuddies means an easier day for the less sticky ones. NOT SO STICKY BY 7

Come From Behind vs Stir The Sauce (EVEN) - Stir The Sauce knows deep inside that they’re the best team in the division and the title is theirs to lose, even if most of the division doesn’t think so. STS already beat CFB once this season, but since then CFB has been on a tear, and their defense is dialed in. COME FROM BEHIND BY 3

D6

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Dogg Pound 27, Purple Nurples 8

TMA 12, Balls Deep 6

Blitzkrieg 51, Sticky Laces 16

Sticky Laces 22, Dogg Pound 20

Sausage McMuffins 38, Day By Day 15

 

The Dogg Pound get a convincing win over the Nurps before losing to Sticky Laces again. Sticky Laces were 1-1 on the day after getting bowled over by Blitzkrieg. TMA outscored Balls Deep in a barnburner, while the Sausage McMuffins handled Day By Day without any issue. 

This Week’s Games

 

Day By Day vs Sticky Laces (+7) - Day By Day used to be the upstart D6 dark horse candidate, but after a 1 point win over Dogg Pound (should’ve been more), and losing to Balls Deep and the McMuffins, things don’t look as rosy as they once did. Sticky Laces represents a chance to get back on track though. The Laces find themselves much improved from last season, but they don’t quite have the horses to run with the class of the league just yet. DAY BY DAY BY 6

Blitzkrieg vs TMA (+13) - TMA is having fun again it seems, but this game feels like it will be anything but fun. Best Offense. Best Defense. Blitzkrieg is extra special this time around. BLITZKRIEG BY 17

 

Sausage McMuffins vs Dogg Pound (+10) - While the Dogg Pound are improving, they’re improving in terms of “competing with the bottom 5 teams of the division”, not so much the top ones. The McMuffins might be a slight step behind Blitzkrieg right now, but they’re leaps and bounds ahead of the rest. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 14

 

Sausage McMuffins vs TMA (+8) - Mix the last two predictions. SMM represents a slightly less hard challenge to TMA than Blitzkrieg does, but it's still not going to be too pretty. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 12

 

Balls Deep vs Purple Nurples (EVEN) - Both of these teams fall into the “which one of them is going to show up” category. The ones that put up 40+ points or the ones that put up single digits? These two teams are hard to figure out, and I’m sure they feel the same way internally. BALLS DEEP BY 8

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• Is this the least competitive each division has been this late in the season? Probably, at least from what I can remember. There’s a clear line of the ‘haves’ and ‘have nots’ in every division besides D3, which will always be the TSL Thunderdome. 

 

 

 

• Is the D1/D2 crossover a success or a failure? I’m assuming you mean because of the 13-4-1 record D1 has over D2? It’s still a success. The teams are all having fun, and playing different teams is good for both of them. Right now, the Mavericks would be 2nd in D1, and Can’t Touch This would be in 4th. They can compete. Scared Hitless has been in D1, they can compete. They’re 5 total points away from wins over Eyes Downtown and Sticky and 7 total points away from a win over the Mavs too. There’s only been like 4 blowouts, and 2 of them were from the Wet Bandits stepping on necks. It’s a rousing success. 

 

 

 

• Do your preseason championship predictions still look good? Well, let’s take a look. In D1 I have the Wet Bandits over the Sticky Bandits. That looks good. In D2, I went with The Malones beating The Untouchaballs in the final. That looks terrible, but not impossible. In D3 I had The Wanderers winning the title over Mix’n It Up. They’re a combined 11-2, and might be on a crash course for the title. D4 I picked The Stunts to win, which was a slam dunk. I picked them to beat the Creekers, couldn’t be more wrong. Half credit. D5 it was Not So Sticky over Spinelli’s. Highly unlikely, but it could happen for sure. And finally in D6 it was Blitzkrieg beating the McMuffins, and I’m very much on pace for that one. So, 3.5 out of 6 isn’t the worst, but the playoffs, as always, are a different animal. 

 

 

 

• Who has surprised you the most? It’s GUCCI. It has to be. I don’t think they’ve finished below .500 yet in the TSL, and they’re consistently in the running for the #1 seed. Seeing them at 2-5 just feels wrong. 

 

 

 

• What divisional race are you most excited to see play out in the regular season? D1 is easily the answer. It’s the best football (usually), and the top three teams all have a shot at the #1 seed and the bye, despite how good the Wet Bandits have been. A Sticky sweep this week would be a fantastic and unexpected story. 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• After hearing about the arguing and the drama with the refs this week, I’ll lead off with the casual reminder to not be jerks to the refs, even if you disagree with how they’re calling the game. 

 

 

 

• Breakfast Club Predictions: 

• Steph Infection 47, Dri Girls 1 Cup 44

• Syd On My Face 32, Carlyac Arrest 30

• D’s Nuts 37, All Ryled Up 30

 

 

 

• Steph Infection and Dri Girls 1 Cup look to be the current favorites to meet in the Breakfast Club finals, so this seems like a bit of a preview this week. 

 

 

 

• Games of the Day: 

• 9:00 - Steph Infection vs Dri Girls 1 Cup

• 10:00 - Eyes Downtown vs Sticky Bandits

• 11:00 - Sticky Bandits vs Wet Bandits

• 12:00 - Buffalo Vice vs Let’s Get Reccked

• 1:00 - ILF vs Cobblestone

• 2:00 - Come From Behind vs Stir The Sauce

• 3:00 - Mavericks vs Freeballers

 

 

 

• As the calendar turns toward October, so does the Buffalo weather. My trusty weather channel app tells me you’re heading for a sunny day, but the temperature is going to be hanging out around 60 degrees for most of the games. “Football weather” in its purest form. 

 

 

 

• It looks like the TSL Banquet is looking at December 6th or so for the target date. Keep that day open, but after speaking with Jeff it looks like nothing is finalized yet, but will be soon!

 

 

 

• CAPTAINS: Soon enough, you’ll be getting an email from Jeff Krol about TSL Awards, PLEASE take the time to fill out your thoughts on nominees, even if you only do it about your own division. If you don’t know somebody’s name, do your best to describe them and the league will figure it out. 

 

 

 

• PLAYERS: Yell at your captains to fill that awards sheet out. We don’t get nearly the amount of responses we should for something of this magnitude. 

 

 

• I’ve received MANY mentions of how good the Rose Garden bartenders have been this year. Make sure you give them an extra tip this week. Business is about to slow down in a few weeks. 

 

 

 

• When you’re parking, I’ve heard the people in the middle are blocking in the people near the fields. Please don’t be a dummy, and use your brain to leave a space for them to get out. Too often I hear about how some jamoke parks in the exit lane and people from the league have to start searching for the answer to “WHO DRIVES THIS CAR THEY NEED TO MOVE IT?!?”. Just be smart. 

 

 

-GF OUT

WEEK 8 THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 11 October 2024 18:56

Published: Friday, 11 October 2024 18:56

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 104

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, we are currently ONE week away from the start of the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality, as the TSL Fall 2024 playoffs will commence! While Topper is currently looking for an “Olympics-like” Cauldron for a flame to burn, complete with B’s Brother running the TSL Torch into the fields to light the fire to kick off the games, the rest of the TSL has some unfinished business to take care of. That’s right, there are 26 of the 239 total games on the schedule remaining to determine regular season division winners (who get nothing for the achievement of surviving the last 8 weeks and coming out on top), and most importantly seeding and placement for the greatest Social Co-Ed Football Tournament there is: The TSL Playoffs. 

 

While next week is Playoff Saturday, we get a taste of the playoff action as the Breakfast Club playoffs start this weekend. The TSL’s 7th division for people who think that they’re morning people when they really aren’t will kick off the first round of action early because when you’re locked into only having 9am games, you can’t really play two games in one day. More on that later though. 

 

Now, I’m sure you’re asking “Oh wise Godfather, why does seeding for the playoffs even matter? Everyone makes the playoffs, so it’s not like we’ll miss out, and there’s so many upsets every season, it doesn’t REALLY put us at disadvantage, right?” to which I say: You’re right, sort of. Seeding isn’t the MOST important thing, but why on Earth would you make things harder on yourself? If one win this weekend can be the difference between your team playing in a 4v5 game next week over finishing 8th and getting the top seed, wouldn’t you want to win? Luckily, most of the league is filled with hyper competitive people who want to win (you can be both hyper competitive AND fun to play with or against, by the way), so winning will be a priority anyway. 

 

So what’s left to play for this week? What do we already know for the playoffs? Is anything set in stone? Let’s dive into each division and see where we’re at. 

D1/D2

 

Last Week’s Games

 

D1

 

Eyes Downtown 46, Sticky Bandits 44

Wet Bandits 32, Sticky Bandits 16

Frodo Swaggins 46, Freeballers 21

 

D1/D2 Crossover Corner

 

Eyes Downtown 53, Can’t Touch This 45

Wet Bandits 51, Scared Hitless 23

Freeballers 32, Mavericks 23

 

D1 leads the Crossover Series 16-4-1

 

D2

 

Can’t Touch This 42, The Untouchaballs 6

The Malones 47, Mavericks 21

Eyes Downtown go 2-0 on the day with wins over Sticky and CTT. Can’t Touch This moved to 1-1 with a dominating win over the Untouchaballs. Sticky would go on to lose to the Wet Bandits later on, who would then beat Scared Hitless as well. Frodo Swaggins got a nice win over the Freeballers, who would later get a win of their own over the Mavericks. The Mavs have their worst TSL Saturday in a while, going 0-2 on the day as they would later lose to The Malones as well. 

D1

 

What We Know:  The Wet Bandits clinched the #1 seed and Eyes Downtown are locked in as the #2 seed, so both will have first round byes.  Freeballers are locked in as the #5 seed and will play the #4 seed in the first round of playoffs.

 

What’s At Stake: Sticky Bandits vs Frodo Swaggins this weekend with the #3 seed (and last playoff bye) on the line!  Winner gets next week off... loser plays Freeballers on October 19th.

 

D2

 

What We Know: The Mavericks and Can’t Touch This are locked into the top 2 seeds, clinching the first round bye weeks. 

 

What’s At Stake: Positioning galore. Either the Mavs or CTT can finish 1st overall, and the 3v6 and 4v5 games aren’t decided at all. We can still get just about any combination of games between the other 4 teams, so we’ll have no idea who plays who until the dust settles this week. 

This Week’s Games

 

D1

 

Sticky Bandits vs Frodo Swaggins (+7) - Winner gets a week to rest, loser gets a date with Freeballers next week.  Is it worth using all your tricks to try to get a first round bye? Or do you keep things pretty vanilla and just assume Freeballers won't give you that much of a headache? It’ll be interesting to see how they play this. STICKY BANDITS BY 8

D1/D2 Crossover Corner

 

Sticky Bandits vs Grey Hair Don’t Care (+14) - I’m sure Sticky will want to go into the playoffs with a solid win, and they’ve got the right opponent to do it. Grey Hair can be surprising at times, and they’re just simply not as bad as you’d think from the results this season, but I can’t imagine an upset. STICKY BANDITS BY 10

 

Can’t Touch This vs Freeballers (+7) - Just a casual reminder that D1 and D2 have played the same schedule, so technically if you combined divisions, CTT would be tied for 3rd in “D1” going into this week. Freeballers would be sitting in 9th of the 11 teams. Yikes. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 7

 

Eyes Downtown vs Mavericks (+8) - The Mavericks had themselves an off week, and instead of getting a “get right” game before the playoffs, they get one of the hottest teams in the TSL in Eyes Downtown. While I believe that the Mavs just had a bad day a week ago and it isn’t “the norm”, it’ll be hard to tell that after this week. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 10

 

D2

 

The Malones vs The Untouchaballs (+10) - Neither team has been having the season they had hoped for, but it is what it is. The playoffs are what matters. Either way though, the UTs seem just, dead in the water. Meanwhile The Malones keep showing signs of life, and you can’t really kill them anyway. THE MALONES BY 18

 

Scared Hitless vs Grey Hair Don’t Care (+10) - While Grey Hair is sometimes surprisingly good, Scared Hitless has had a good season that has just seen them fall short SO MANY TIMES. They won’t fall short this time. SCARED HITLESS BY 13

D3

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Mix’n It Up 38, Jabronies 25

Passing While Intoxicated 24, Buffalo Vice 19

Mix’n It Up 23, Passing While Intoxicated 6

Let’s Get Reccked 39, Buffalo Vice 18

Wanderers 35, Topper’s All Stars & Todd 20

 

Mix’n It Up goes to 2-0 on the day with wins over the Jabronies and PWI. PWI got a win of their own over Buffalo Vice, who would be 0-2 this week with a loss to LGR as well. Topper returned to throw the football in an effort to beat the Wanderers, but that fell short. 

What We Know: In typical D3 fashion: Not much. Mix and Wanderers will end up as the 1-2 seeds, Team Topper is going to play in the 8-9 game, and after that? Nothing. 

 

What’s At Stake: Falling to the #8 seed and having to play an extra playoff game. Right now Buffalo Vice sits there, and with the same record as PWI, the PWI win last week gives them the tiebreaker. Everyone from seeds 3-6 can be moved around. Nothing is really set. 

This Week’s Games

 

Wanderers vs Buffalo Vice (+14) - Vice’s hopes of getting out of the 8 seed took a big hit here, getting the Wanderers who are going for the top seed as well. I can’t imagine things are going to go well for our friends from Vice here. WANDERERS BY 17

 

Let’s Get Reccked vs Passing While Intoxicated (+10) - LGR gets a forfeit win this week over TAST already, so they’re 5-3 going into this game. A win here gives them a shot at the 3 seed, and a loss is going to enter them into the Topper’s Super Secret Tiebreaker Formula Machine to see who shakes out where. PWI’s only wins are against the teams below them in the standings, they have some growing to do. LET’S GET RECCKED BY 14

 

Mix’n It Up vs Practice Squad (+7) - A pretty high profile matchup, even if you ignore the fact that the Squad has hit some speed bumps recently on the way to an 0-3 record in their last few games. Mix rebounded well from the loss last week, and they’re still in the driver’s seat to get the #1 seed. Expect a good game. MIX’N IT UP BY 2

D4

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Creekers 21, Select 0 (forfeit)

ILF 56, Cobblestone 24

GirthQuakes 34, Select 12

Cunning Stunts 55, The Herd 37

 

Select ends up 0-2 for the week, as they limp to the finish line of the season, giving the Creekers a forfeit win and losing to the Quakes too. ILF stomped Cobblestone, and the Stunts beat The Herd, who hung around a little bit, but couldn’t keep up. 

 

What We Know: The Stunts are awesome and the #1 seed. ILF is slightly less awesome but could lose the #2 seed if they lose to The Herd. 

 

What’s At Stake: Like we said, the #2 seed MIGHT be, but the rest of the division looks like it could get really shaken up based on results this week. Not much set in stone here. 

This Week’s Games

 

The Herd vs Creekers (+10) - The Creekers continue to crawl towards the finish line of this disaster of a season, but The Herd have been arguably the best surprise of the season. It’s been said many times before, but what Dalfonso is doing with the former Roaring 20’s has been spectacular. THE HERD BY 14

 

ILF vs The Herd (+6) - While I still think we’re looking at a Stunts-ILF finals, The Herd just won’t go away. ILF had their hiccup a few weeks ago, although a Herd victory here opens up the door for a 3 team race, and they could potentially take the #2 seed from ILF. Which they will. THE HERD BY 3

 

GirthQuakes vs Cobblestone (+3) - The GQs keep on coming, and they find themselves staring at a winning record for the season in the face. Cobblestone and their inconsistent lineup sits in their way, and they still feel a bit too jumbled to stop the quake. GIRTHQUAKES BY 12

 

GirthQuakes vs Vaspian (+8) - The Vaspian hype was real at one point, but they’ve since found themselves in the middle of a 2-5 season that should probably have a couple more wins. They’ve shown that they’re going to be a tough out no matter where they end up in the standings. VASPIAN BY 3

D5

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Power Puff Girls 38, Pit Harade 6

Spinelli’s Plumbing 26, Two Tuddies 12

Two Tuddies 34, Not So Sticky 18

Come From Behind 44, Stir The Sauce 14

 

The PPGs continue dominating D5 as they’ve definitely hit their stride. The Two Tuddies went 1-1, losing, somehow, to Spinelli’s, before regrouping and beating NSS. Come From Behind put a big beatdown on STS. 

What We Know: Nothing really. There’s a world where we could have four teams tied at 6-3, and it’ll be up to the Topper Machine to sort them out. Meanwhile, the “lower 4 teams” could all end up with the same record as well, I think. The point is, nobody knows anything in this division where nobody has ever known anything. 

 

What’s At Stake: Seeding for everyone. Seriously. D5 is a ride. 

This Week’s Games

 

GUCCI vs Spinelli’s Plumbing (+3) - I didn’t have “GUCCI and Spinelli’s are playing to not be last place” on my bingo board this year. However both teams are 2-5 and sitting at the end of the standings. Both teams have had some ups and downs, but it’s not exactly the season either expected. GUCCI BY 3

 

Two Tuddies vs Spinelli’s Plumbing (+7) -  The Tud Buds take on Spinelli’s who will be on the back end of a double header, looking to get a win to lock in 3rd place. Not to mention the fact that the Tuddies have lost to Spinelli’s earlier this season and they’ll be focused on getting that win back. TWO TUDDIES BY 8

 

Not So Sticky vs Pit Harade (+7) - Neither team is really scoring a whole bunch, but they have similar defenses. NSS is on a 4 game losing streak, but one has to think that they’re going to break the slide before the season ends. NOT SO STICKY BY 8

 

Power Puff Girls vs Stir The Sauce (+3) - Big game in D5 as STS looks to make a claim at the #1 seed for the season. The PPGs have been on cruise control for a couple of weeks, and they look really good playing together. STS has been pretty good all season as well, so this one has game of the day potential. STIR THE SAUCE BY 2

 

Come From Behind vs GUCCI (+7) - Usually this is for the #1 seed, but GUCCI didn’t get the memo. The struggling GUCCI vs the top defense and #2 offense in the division doesn’t sound like a fair fight. COME FROM BEHIND BY 13

 

Stir The Sauce vs Pit Harade (+10) - STS could need this win, while PH is pretty locked in to a bottom 3 finish in the standings. While PH is playing better, STS did beat them 34-6 early in the season, and I don’t think PH caught up to them. STIR THE SAUCE BY 12

D6

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Sticky Laces 18, Day By Day 13

Blitzkrieg 38, TMA 14

Sausage McMuffins 36, TMA 0

Purple Nurples 46, Balls Deep 28

Sticky Laces pulls off the win over Day By Day, Blitzkrieg demolished TMA, who then got beaten up on by the McMuffins. Finally the Nurps beat up on Balls Deep a bit. 

What We Know: Blitzkrieg and the McMuffins battling for the #1 seed and game against Dogg Pound. Sticky Laces is locked into the 3rd seed. The rest is up for grabs. 

 

What’s At Stake: Teams are battling to make it to the 4v5 matchup which should be easier than getting to play one of the top teams. 

 

This Week’s Games

 

Day By Day vs TMA (+6) - DBD beat up TMA pretty badly earlier in the season, but TMA has played better since then, even if the record doesn’t always prove that. Meanwhile Day By Day has gone from surprising football darlings to “what the hell happened to them?”. DAY BY DAY BY 7

 

Blitzkrieg vs Balls Deep (+9) - It’s Blitzkrieg’s world, and Balls Deep is just living in it. BK is quite close to an 8-1 record and the #1 seed. They’ll finish the job this time. BLITZKRIEG BY 11

 

Sticky Laces vs Balls Deep (+3) - The Sticky Laces slowly but surely continue to grow, improve, and win more games. A win here over a reeling Balls Deep team just feels like a formality. STICKY LACES BY 8

 

Sausage McMuffins vs Purple Nurples (+10) - The McMuffins are on cruise control, and they’ll fare quite easily against the Nurps. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 16

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• How badly are rosters going to be messed up for Fall Fest? Other than Memorial Day in the spring, Fall Fest accounts for the most “I can’t get enough people to play” excuses for teams. The difference is that these games are a little more important being in the last week of the season. But I’m sure that teams won’t all be at 100% this week. 

 

 

 

• Do we know anything about the playoff schedule yet? Nope. Jeff has to make the schedule based on the many different players with two teams and making sure he can minimize (but not guarantee) those players teams don’t play at the same time. 

 

 

 

• I keep hearing about the Banquet but haven’t seen anything. Did I miss it? No you certainly did not! Jeff Krol sadly found out that we’ll more than likely have to move the banquet to a new place this season (to be fair, we used to move nearly every year), and the date might even be December 13th instead of the 6th. Details will be finalized soon, I’ve been told. 

 

 

 

• You said it’s Breakfast Club playoffs already? Yep! Breakfast Club starts the playoffs a week early because two of the teams get a bye. So we’ll have 3v6 and 4v5 this week, seeds 1 and 2 taking on the winners, and then the remaining two teams will battle for Breakfast Club history after that! Shout out to Dri Girls 1 Cup and Steph Infection for getting the byes with 5-1 records! 

 

 

 

• Will rainouts affect the playoffs and push them back? Good question. In a word, No. Tell your teammates now to plan to have the 19th and 26th cleared, just in case. This is called “advance warning.” Remember no subs in the playoffs! 

 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR TOMORROW

 

 

• Breakfast Club Playoffs: 

• D’z Nuts 35, All Ryled Up 20

• Syd On My Face 40, Carlyac Arrest 37

 

 

 

• The weather is looking to be 60 degrees and mostly sunny this week, beautiful weather for football. 

 

 

 

• Or more than likely, Fall Fest, which was the reason for Topper forfeiting. It’s not to “keep his arm fresh” for the playoffs. 

 

 

 

• It feels like The Sentinel isn’t watching very much anymore. That’s why I think it’s Buddy Lee. 

 

 

 

• Joey Batts really went 18-0 this season, and we’re all going to have to hear about it. 

 

 

 

• Let’s remind ourselves that as the games become more meaningful, tempers will flare. Be good to league officials and to the referees who are doing their best. Fun fact: they don’t care who wins. 

 

 

 

• I really hope The Herd pulls off the upset in the playoffs. What a story that would be. 

 

 

 

• Three teams that need a win badly: Practice Squad, Scared Hitless, Day By Day

 

 

 

• Remember when Select was on fire to start the season and people were upset about having a star on the roster in Malikye? That aged well. 

 

 

 

• Topper returning at Quarterback is exactly what this league needs. Up next: He’s throwing for Breakfast Club. 

 

 

-GF OUT

WEEK 6 THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 27 September 2024 14:12

Published: Friday, 27 September 2024 14:12

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 157

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, I’m sad to report that there are only three weeks remaining in the TSL Fall 2024 regular season. As always, the saddest part of any TSL season is how quickly it seems to pass as we’re in it. But right now, it isn’t time to be sad. No, the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality is nearly upon us. I’ve said many, many times that the most important thing isn’t how you begin a season, it’s how you finish it. How you grow during the season, and how you, as a team, overcome the unique challenges every single season presents you. 

 

The first two weeks of the TSL season tend to show us a picture of how the season is going to go, but more often than not the teams that were good (and the ones that were bad) in the beginning of the season show their true colors from Week 3 and beyond. If we ignore the first two weeks of the season, who has been good? Who has been bad? It’s in the meaty middle of the schedule that we may get an idea of who will be spraying the very, very expensive Jeff Krol Private Stock champagne on October 26th. 

 

STOCK UP (these teams have been some of the best since Week 3 began)

 

-Wet Bandits. No surprises here. They’re 3-0 in this stretch, and have looked every bit the dominant favorite for the D1 title. Good thing there’s not a team out there that can put it all together and beat them for a Fall championship. Oh, wait, hold on a minute.

 

-Eyes Downtown. ED has shaken off whatever was off with them from last season and now find themselves also 3-0 in this stretch, looking every bit as good as the Wet Bandits. The defending Fall D1 champs look to be rounding into form at just the right time. 

 

-Mavericks. The Mavs look like they’ll be playing for the D2 title at this rate. They’re 3-1 since Week 3, and the 1 was a 13 point loss to the Wet Bandits. 

 

-Can’t Touch This. They’re only 2-0, and while I wanted to avoid looking at teams that have only played 2 or less games for this exercise, CTT is a current “top tier” TSL squad. Why? Those two wins were against the defending D1 champs in Sticky Bandits, and the defending D3 champs who moved up to D2 and were strongly considered to be placed in D1 in The Malones. 

 

-Scared Hitless. They deserve this mention, even if they’re 2-2 during this stretch. The losses are a 2 point loss to the Mavericks and a 4 point loss to the Sticky Bandits. They’re absolutely priming themselves to be the “lower seed that makes the championship game” in D2, and they’re going to be everyone’s favorite “Long Shot” bet before the playoffs begin. 

 

-Mix’n It Up. Team Keller has taken another step forward overall, as they’re 4-0 in this stretch, finding ways to win every which way they can. Damien looks like a younger, less handsome Scott Sr. throwing the ball, and once he realizes the power of using the workout bands on the sidelines before games, Damien should have a real shot at D3 QB of the Year. 

 

-Wanderers. 3-1 since Week 3, looking every bit as dominant as they usually do at this point. Their only loss was to Mix’n It Up. Par for the course here. 

 

-Practice Squad. Anyone who was waiting for them to crack after a hot start has been severely disappointed. They’re 3-1 since Week 3, and the only loss was a close one to the Wanderers. And they’re only going to be better once “Playoff B” shows up. 

 

-Cunning Stunts. 3-0, dominating the boys as they do all of the time. 

 

-The Herd. Yes, you ‘Herd’ me right. They’re 3-0, and averaging 47 points a game during this time period, and they’re rounding into form as one of the TSL’s hottest teams. They get rematches against both the Stunts and ILF before the season ends (Yes, they got both of these teams as the two teams they play twice. Jeff Krol clearly hates them.) and it’ll be exciting to see how they fare against them now. 

 

-Come From Behind. 3-1 since Week 3 with the lone loss being a 1 point loss to Stir The Sauce. Rounding into form at the perfect time, they’ve only allowed an average of 14.75 points per game during this stretch. It’s more impressive when you realize they’ve played GUCCI and Not So Sticky along the way. 

 

-Two Tuddies. The Tud Buds are still crashing the D5 party, sitting at 3-1 since Week 3 with the loss coming against the Power Puff Girls. Nothing to sneeze at there. They’re looking to be for real. 

 

-Blitzkrieg. 3-1 in D6 with a loss to the upstart Day By Day. Whispers around the league continue to get louder that this year HAS to be the year for them…right? 

STOCK DOWN (teams who have just been “not great” since Week 3, regardless of how they started the year)

 

-The Malones. 0-3 since Week 3. That seemed unfathomable heading into the season. Losing to Eyes Downtown in a Crossover game? Fine. Losing to Frodo? Explainable. Losing by 22 to Can’t Touch This? CTT is very good, but that’s not what you’re expecting from The Malones. This season we went from The Malones vs Everybody, to The Malones vs The Malones. I have faith they’ll figure it out. It just might be in the Spring. 

 

-The Untouchaballs. 1-4 since Week 3. Rumors early on that Burr wasn’t going to play QB. The top candidate for “Season From Hell”, the UT have struggled mightily on defense, they got waxed this past week by Wet Bandits and Mavericks, and very clearly something isn’t right here. 

 

-Topper’s All Stars & Todd. 1-4 in this stretch, roster issues have plagued them a bit, and so have injuries. They haven’t had great QB play this season, picking up subs more often than not, but there’s hope here. They finally got the team together, and should have beaten Mix’n It Up. And even better, Topper was heard on the sidelines saying that he finally feels ready to throw again. There’s a world where Topper starts behind center before the season ends, beats the Wanderers in the last week of the season, and then goes on a magical playoff journey that will prove, once and for all, that we really are living in a simulation. 

There aren't a lot of pure “Stock Down” teams because right now we have a lot of teams in the “mushy middle” where they went 2-1 or 1-2 and they’re in close games or improving in the last few weeks. Yes, even Cobblestone. There’s a lot of football left, and these current trends could change by the time we roll into Week 8. Some teams like Stir the Sauce and Sticky Bandits have 5 games remaining and could easily find themselves on either one of these lists. Others such as Frodo Swaggins, Grey Hair Don’t Care, and Bullet Club only have 2 games left to go (and Bullet Club only technically has one left, with a forfeit win from the Straw Hats still coming for them) and at this point one has to think that they are who they are. 

 

As always, it’s going to be very interesting to watch it all unfold. 

D1/D2

 

Last Week’s Games

 

D1

 

Eyes Downtown 32, Frodo Swaggins 25

 

D1/D2 Crossover Corner

 

Wet Bandits 60, The Untouchaballs 32

Grey Hair Don’t Care 28, Frodo Swaggins 28 (TIE)

 

D1 leads the Crossover Season Series 11-4-1. 

 

D2

 

Can’t Touch This 52, The Malones 30

Mavericks 48, The Untouchaballs 9

Mavericks 42, Scared Hitless 40

Eyes Downtown continues to roll, this time beating Frodo by a TD. Frodo ended up going 0-1-1 on the day giving us our first tie of the season (Non-Breakfast Club version) when they split with Grey Hair Don’t Care. The Wet Bandits have the new season high for points in a game with 60 this year, as they pummeled The Untouchaballs, who would then go on to get smacked by the Mavericks as well. The Mavs were 2-0 on the day, also getting a hard fought win over Scared Hitless, 42-40. And finally, Can’t Touch This takes care of The Malones and seem to be headed for a collision course with the Mavericks for D2 supremacy. 

This Week’s Games: 

 

D1

 

Eyes Downtown vs Freeballers (+10) - Eyes Downtown has been very good lately, and while the Freeballers have been improving, they’re not quite on the level of Bobby and Co. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 18

 

D1/D2 Crossover Corner

 

Sticky Bandits vs The Untouchaballs (+10) - Sticky Nation has only played 4 games so far this season, and after a week off get back at it against an Untouchaballs squad that is playing about as poorly as they ever have recently. I do not doubt UT’s ability to figure it out and roll in the playoffs, they’ve done it before, but right now this feels different. STICKY BANDITS BY 14

 

Wet Bandits vs The Malones (+12) - The Wet Bandits are essentially doing to D1/D2 what The Malones did to D3 last season. They average 48 points a game, and just blow teams out of the water. The Malones aren’t quite themselves as they adjust to the better teams in the league, and they’re about to become that bad guy in a movie that finally realizes “Oh my god, is THAT what I’ve been doing to others?”. WET BANDITS BY 17

 

D2

 

Mavericks vs Grey Hair Don’t Care (+14) - GHDC is 1-5-1 heading into this game, not quite what they had in mind this season. It’s clear they could use another stand out player, but that’s what the offseason is for. The Mavericks continue to just casually cruise to 40 points and victories. They look to be 7-1 heading into a Week 8 crossover matchup with Eyes Downtown that could be very fun to watch. Hopefully, they don’t get caught looking ahead like I’m doing. MAVERICKS BY 24

D3

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Mix’n It Up 30, Topper’s All-Stars & Todd 29

Bullet Club 34, Passing While Intoxicated 17

Wanderers 36, Practice Squad 30

Mix’n It Up 41, Buffalo Vice 35

Topper’s All-Stars & Todd 21, Straw Hats 0 (Forfeit)

Jabronies 30, Let’s Get Reccked 8

 

D3 continues to be quite exciting, as Mix’n It Up goes for the 2 point conversion and sneaks by TAST to win the game. Mix would end up 2-0 on the day after getting a one score win over Buffalo Vice as well. Bullet Club put together a nice win over PWI, who continues to look like they belong in D3, even if they’re still not quite getting the results they expect from themselves just yet. Wanderers get a huge win over Practice Squad, beating them by a touchdown to ruin the perfect season. And lastly, the Jabronies had no trouble with LGR, waltzing to a victory. 

This Week’s Games

 

Practice Squad vs Jabronies (+7) - These two teams have one thing in common for sure: They both have close losses to the Wanderers this season. Other than that, Practice Squad has been enjoying a fantastic season, while the Jabronies have certainly had their share of ups and downs. Give me the more consistent team here. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 8

 

Jabronies vs Passing While Intoxicated (+6) - Joe Miano vs Buddy Lee is the unexpected QB battle we didn’t know we wanted, but we’re glad to have coming our way. Both teams have some question marks, PWI with their guys, and Jabronies with their ladies, so it’ll be interesting to see which QB uses their players better here. A Buddy to Tori TD for the win? My Sources Say Yes. PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED BY 4. 

 

Practice Squad vs Bullet Club (+5) - While Practice Squad has been enjoying a great season, secretly so has Bullet Club. A season removed from being 2-6 and in the “Play In” game, Bullet Club has already doubled their win total (counting the Straw Hats forfeit) from last season, and if you remove the two blowout losses in Week 1, they’re 4-2 since, with the two losses being one score games with Mix and LGR. This should be a pretty good game, but give me the team with B. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 3. 

 

Mix’n It Up vs Let’s Get Reccked (+6) - Mix is sitting pretty at 5-0, looking to continue their hot start against LGR who continues to disappoint. LGR is 2-3 but could easily be 4-1. They never seem to put it all together though. This should have Game of the Day potential. MIX’N IT UP BY 2

D4

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Cobblestone 27, Creekers 21

ILFers 40, Creekers 13

The Herd 46, Select 33

Cunning Stunts 42, GirthQuakes 31

 

Cobblestone wins…and it counts! Cobblestone beats the Creekers despite playing a man down. Things don’t get any better for the Creekers as they fall to 0-2 on the day as ILF blows them out. The Herd continues to rock and roll, putting up a bunch of points as they get by Select. And then finally, the GirthQuakes get introduced to the Stunts, losing by 11. 

This Week’s Games

 

Cunning Stunts vs Creekers (+13) - The Creekers are up next for the Stunts to slaughter. The Stunts beat the Creekers 45-20 earlier in the year. I don’t think the Creekers figured out defense in the last week. CUNNING STUNTS BY 17

 

ILF vs Vaspian (+7) - Vaspian is still under the radar a bit, but they’ve closed the gap nicely between themselves and the top teams in the division for sure this year. They’re slightly on my upset radar, but I don’t have the testicular fortitude to pick them to do it. The ILFers are just too good. ILF BY 4

 

ILF vs GirthQuakes (+10) - A double dose of ILF is always good for the league, but it’s not going to be great for the GQs (it’s catching on). There’s some talent on the GirthQuakes, and they’re going to win some games at some point. It’s just not this time. ILF BY 10

 

Vaspian vs Cobblestone (+7) - Every nice thing I’m saying about Vaspian might be all for nothing if they fall short against Cobblestone, who is having just a tough season, but might be turning things around? Either way, Vaspian should be “ahead” of Cobblestone, even if you can never count out Darryl Carr QB Superstar when it comes to football. VASPIAN BY 6

 

Cunning Stunts vs Select (+14) - Select has been outscored 84-41 the last two weeks in blowout losses to Vaspian and The Herd. It’s a far cry from when they were 2-1 after a 5 point loss to ILF where they could’ve won. Now they’re all over the place and they get a Cunning Stunts team that couldn’t be more on fire. Not the best time for them to cross paths if you’re Select. CUNNING STUNTS BY 17

D5

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Pit Harade 25, Spinelli’s Plumbing 24

Power Puff Girls 33, Two Tuddies 16

GUCCI 28, Not So Sticky 6

Come From Behind 34, Pit Harade 16

Power Puff Girls 51, GUCCI 36

Come From Behind 48, Not So Sticky 22

 

Pit Harade gets their first win in D5 with a nice win over Spinelli’s, before they lose to Come From Behind to go to 1-1 on the day. CFB went to 2-0, as they also collected a win over Not So Sticky, who went 0-2 after they lost to GUCCI as well. GUCCI was 1-1 on the day as the Power Puff Girls collected a win over them, and PPG ended up giving the Tud Buds their first loss of the season as well to get to 2-0 on the day. 

 

This Week’s Games

 

Power Puff Girls vs Spinelli’s Plumbing (+10) - I said last season that the PPGs were figuring this whole “gender team” thing out, and they carried it all over to this season as they’ve been absolutely great this fall. Spinelli’s still has some kinks to work out, mostly defensively, which can only mean that they’re boned in this one. POWER PUFF GIRLS BY 17

 

GUCCI vs Stir The Sauce (EVEN) - Stir The Sauce has played three straight 1 point games, going 1-2 in them. They upset GUCCI in the playoffs last year, and you HAVE to think GUCCI remembers that. GUCCI has been good for a while. STS keeps getting better and better. This game is going to be one to remember. STS needs it more. STIR THE SAUCE BY 1

 

GUCCI vs Pit Harade (+10) - Pit Harade finally got in the win column and it coincided with the return of their own female QB, Rayanna. That’s probably not a coincidence. PH has struggled through roster issues which is never the move for going up a division, but having Ray throw gives them an easy answer to the 8 points GUCCI gets from All-World QB Kelly Kane. (2 female QBs AND a gender team? D5 is fun.) However, give me the experience of Kelly in this one. GUCCI BY 12

 

Not So Sticky vs Stir The Sauce (EVEN) - I don’t fully know what to think about STS just yet. I know they’re on the rise. They’re in every game. But then you look and they haven’t had the hardest schedule just yet. Ending with NSS, GUCCI, CFB, and PPG will really show us what we have with them. Not So Sticky is right where they always seem to be, at .500, winning some nice games, losing some others. You never quite know what you’re going to get, which is part of the charm. NOT SO STICKY BY 1

 

Come From Behind vs Two Tuddies (+3) - The Tuddies still don’t get tons of respect from the oddsmakers as they continue to have to prove themselves to not be a fluke. On one hand, they’ve beaten Not So Sticky, GUCCI, and Stir The Sauce. On the other hand, NSS was Week 1, GUCCI was that weird week GUCCI didn’t have anyone, and they snuck by STS by a point. Then the PPGs smacked them a bit. CFB, meanwhile, is playing some very good football, and they seemed poised to finally get that title that’s been eluding them for a bit. If the Two Tuddies are serious contenders, they’ll win this week. They are. TWO TUDDIES BY 2

D6

 

Last Week’s Games

 

Blitzkrieg 47, Purple Nurples 6

Sausage McMuffins 38, Sticky Laces 18

Balls Deep 42, Day By Day 37

Blitzkrieg 42, Dogg Pound 6

Purple Nurples 41, TMA 24

 

Blitzkrieg goes 2-0 with a pair of nearly identical dominating wins over the Dogg Pound and Purple Nurples. The Nurps would go 1-1 on the day with a win over TMA. Meanwhile, the McMuffins continue to win football games, beating Sticky Laces by 20, and Balls Deep puts up 42 points in a win over Day By Day. 

 

This Week’s Games

 

Purple Nurples vs Dogg Pound (+7) - This will depend on what players show up for the Nurps, but you know the DP will roll 14 people deep. Dogg Pound is close to everything ‘clicking’ and having wins come their way, and honestly? I think it clicks this week. DOGG POUND BY 6

 

Balls Deep vs TMA (+7) - Okay Balls Deep, I see you. 42 points against a very good DBD team is a good way to get noticed. I still think Balls Deep is a step behind the top teams in D6, but they closed that gap a little now. TMA apparently struggles because their QB never shows up for them. When he does, they win and play well. When he doesn’t, things aren’t great. Someone needs to kidnap Ryan and force him to be there every week, if he is, they win this game. But I can’t assume he will be there. BALLS DEEP BY 8

 

Blitzkrieg vs Sticky Laces (+10) - Blitzkrieg’s collective buttholes are tightening as the season draws nearer to a close. No team in TSL history has won as many games, been favored and picked to win a championship, and then never ends up doing it more than they have. Now they’re 5-1 after two easy peasy wins, and an 8-1 record with the #1 seed is in their sights, and VERY attainable. Hopefully they shake off the PTSD from years past. Sticky Laces finds themselves at 3-2 and showing lots of improvement from a season ago. This game is the litmus test of all litmus tests to see if they belong in the championship chatter. Not sure they’re there just yet. BLITZKRIEG BY 18

 

Sticky Laces vs Dogg Pound (+3) - A small, budding rivalry continues in D6 as DP and the Laces (which sounds like a Rock Band name) meet up yet again. These teams play close, tight games, and they did so again Week 1 in a 2 point win for the Laces. The Laces get a win yet again here. STICKY LACES BY 2

 

Sausage McMuffins vs Day By Day (EVEN) - The Day By Day for D6 favorites train got a little derailed after their loss to Balls Deep, but they can right the ship with a win over the McMuffins this week. I have to hand it to SMM, Alex keeps his team chugging along, and they keep easily winning the games they’re “supposed” to win, winning by an average score of 41 - 25. They’re quietly a Top 10 team in the super accurate Topper formula TSL Rankings. They have a great squad, and Eric Pochylski is in the running for the “Guy Way Too Good For His Division” award. Day By Day is good, and could win this game, I just don’t think they will. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 7

 

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• Who has been the most disappointing team this season so far? While The Untouchaballs haven’t been the best version of themselves, I’m going to go with the Creekers. They’re 1-4, and haven’t even gotten to 100 points scored yet. When you have a talent like Mullet Guy on your team, you need to win more, especially after last season. 

 

 

 

• Does anyone go undefeated for the whole season? The following teams haven’t lost a game yet: Wet Bandits, Mix’n It Up, Cunning Stunts. Mix’n It Up barely escaped Team Topper last week, and with 4 tough games remaining, I can see them dropping at least one of them. The Wet Bandits have three games to go - The Malones, Sticky Bandits, and Scared Hitless. As of now, I think they have a 90% chance of winning them all. And as for the Stunts, they have Creekers, Select, and The Herd left. The Herd should give them the best fight, but even if they double their total points scored from the first time these two played, they’d still lose 52-48. So I think we’ll see two teams go undefeated in the regular season, which means Joey Batts will go 18-0, which will most likely, hopefully, raise Chris Cole and Matty Ice from their graves to battle him. 

 

 

 

• Who has been the most surprising team this season? I have to go with The Herd. They’re playing fantastic right now, and they don’t look anything like last year’s team. Honorable mentions to Practice Squad and Two Tuddies, who are both playing much better than anticipated. 

 

 

 

• Is this the most even the divisions have been in recent memory? As usual, D3 is very close from top to bottom. D2 is also full of teams that all beat each other, and so is D5 for the most part. D6 has a lot of teams that could be the “top” teams if they sleep on them. D1 has the Wet Bandits winning a bunch, but they’re not THAT far away from Eyes Downtown and Sticky. And Frodo is much improved. D4 is slightly top heavy, but with The Herd, Select, and Vaspian all being much improved, it’s closer than we thought. So yeah, I think this might be the most competitive the TSL has been in a bit. 

 

 

 

• Did we get TSL Banquet details yet? Not yet, but you know we’ll have an announcement from Jeff soon about the greatest party of the year. A wedding without the wedding, and we give some awards out and then drink and dance the night away? Sounds pretty great, doesn’t it? You’ll WANT to be there. 

 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• It seems like Breakfast Club is getting closer than ever, which is exactly how it should be. Teams are also gaining ground on Steph Infection, so maybe Steph WON’T win again. Good. 

 

 

 

• Breakfast Club Predictions: 

• Dri Girls 1 Cup 35, Carlyac Arrest 22

• Steph Infection 40, Syd On My Face 37

• D’s Nutz 24, All Ryled Up 23

 

 

 

• Games of the Day: 

• 10:00 - Jabronies vs Practice Squad

• 11:00 - Bullet Club vs Practice Squad

• 12:00 - GUCCI vs Stir The Sauce

• 1:00 - The Malones vs Wet Bandits

• 2:00 - Come From Behind vs Two Tuddies

• 3:00 - Grey Hair Don’t Care vs Mavericks

 

 

 

• My trusty weather channel app tells me that the weather in Buffalo for Saturday looks to be 75 and cloudy - perfect weather for football. Although it’s going to be 84 and Sunny here in Des Moines. 

 

 

 

• There haven’t been too many freakouts on referees as of late, even when they make a mistake. Good job everyone. 

 

 

 

• The bar continues to be hopping during the day from what I hear, which is always good. Get out there and make some new friends, especially if your own team is a bunch of weaklings who go straight home. 

 

 

 

• An unprecedented amount of requests for female subs have been coming in lately. Ladies, quit skipping your games. (I expect this to be just as bad during Fall Fest on the 12th).

 

 

 

• Topper saying he’s ready to throw again after potentially retiring for “forever” is one of the most exciting things to happen in the TSL in at least a few days. “Someone has to stop Joey Batts!” was his direct quote. I don’t think he knows how divisions work, which would honestly explain a lot of the TSL’s history. 

 

 

 

• Please remember that when it’s B’s brother’s sleepy time around 1pm, don’t disturb him. Doing so will result in suspensions. 

 

 

 

• The fields are holding up well, Field 5 is actually improving (compared to what you may think) as the season goes on, and for the most part it’s been reported to me that the league has run rather smoothly. It takes a village, so good work on the part of everyone that helps the TSL continue to be the best Social Co-Ed Touch Football experience it can be. 

 

-GF OUT