• Print
• Email

"Championships are won by teams who love one another, who enjoy and respect one another and play for and support one another.” – Tom Coughlin

Hello and welcome back to your definitive, unquestionable, undisputed Quarterback Power Rankings!  In some weeks, building the QB Rankings are easier than others for our Committee.  Cole at the top, Bobby, Matty, Joey, Newman, all the usual faces, and the order sort of works itself out nicely.  Other weeks are a lot messier... and that's where we find ourselves right now.  It's hard enough when D2 is loaded with SO much talent that each QB can make a credible claim that they should be higher on our list... but to sort through our D2 Power Rankings nightmare while ALSO expanding to a Top Twenty this week (yes, we'll be covering even more of you this week), well, that's a real headache.

So let's get right to it.  Here are the Week Three TSL QB Power Rankings:

The top three are still the top three, but not in the same order...

#1 Chris Cole - Public Enemy - (Previous Rank #1)

Last Week:  Beat Eyes Downtown 34-28

The highest ranked Quarterback in WNY Touch Football has beaten the (previously) second highest ranked Quarterback in WNY Touch Football in a one-score game.  What did we learn from this?  Probably nothing we didn't already know.  Bobby became the first QB to drop 20+ points against the Public Enemy defense this season, and yet he still got outscored by the Champs.  Public Enemy is still undefeated, and Cole still gets to run his mouth about how great he is.  This was the first meeting of the "Big Three" QBs and their teams this season, and we still don't have anything resembling an upset win in D1 yet.  Public Enemy enters their bye week undefeated, which means there is approximately a 0% chance that Cole drops a spot NEXT week either.  

#2 David "Bro" Kleckler - Tight Ends in Motion - (Previous Rank #3)

Last Week:  Beat Sloppy Seconds 52-20

Tight Ends in Motion could not have imagined a better start to their season.  Still undefeated, still the #1 offense in the TSL, still the #1 defense in the TSL, and still (obviously) the #1 point differential in the TSL, all while playing in D1.  In fact let's pause to look at their dominance graphically:

There are only ten teams in the League as of this moment that are winning by an average of 10.0+ PPG, as shown above.  Tight Ends is a full 11.3 PPG better than the next closest team.  We don't expect this will last: their next two opponents are Eyes Downtown and Public Enemy, who are ALSO on the chart above.  But hey, worth appreciating while it lasts.  Bro's 52 point effort combined with Bobby's loss to Public Enemy (and his near loss to the same team that Bro dominated this week) is enough to push Bro Kleckler into the #2 ranking.

#3 Bobby McConnell - Eyes Downtown - (Previous Rank #2)

Last Week:  Lost to Public Enemy 34-28, beat Sloppy Seconds 43-40

A "glass half full" argument would say that Bobby was only 7 points away from beating the defending Champs and extending his record to 4-0 in D1.  A "glass half empty" argument would say that Bobby was only 4 points away from losing to Sloppy Seconds, and needed a huge second half comeback to catch up and avoid a 2-2 record.  Both are true of course, but that's football; any team is capable of winning just about any game... even if it has rarely felt that way in D1 this session.  As it is, Eyes Downtown is 3-1 with the second best offense in D1 and the 6th best offense in the entire TSL at 37.3 PPG.  Bobby is as "top tier" as it gets, and he'll get his chance to reclaim that #2 ranking next week IF he can take down Tight Ends in Motion and their #1 ranked... well, everything.

So there's your undisputed TSL Top Three.  After them, it gets really interesting, as we have half a dozen D2 QBs with great records and/or great stats and one overlooked D1 candidate.  We felt VERY strongly about #4, but after that... you could make an argument about any of the #5-#9 QBs in any order.  Here's how we ranked them...

#4 Matty Ice - A&A / The Angels - (Previous Rank #4)

Last Week:  Beat Losing Streak 32-6 (A&A), beat Vaspian 50-22 (The Angels)

Easy #4 here.  A&A is the only D2 team to have won every game this session (only one touchdown shy of leading their division for best offense) and the Angels are ALSO undefeated in D3 with the best offense in THAT division (second best in all of the TSL at less than 1 PPG behind Tight Ends in Motion).  Matty is 5-0 as a starter this session and showing no rust from his year off.  If both teams win championships (we're getting WAY ahead of ourselves here) will Matty move A&A up to D1 and Matty's Angels up to D2?  Odds are against ALL of that of course, but we can dream.

#5 Joey Batts - Mountain Dew Me / Cunning Stunts - (Previous Rank #5)

Last Week:  Lost to Peachy Platoon 32-25 (Mountain Dew Me), beat Woodpeckers 43-15 (Cunning Stunts)

Mountain Dew Me has a .500 record and is ranked fourth in D2 in PPG (behind two QBs lower than him in these rankings); that would be the argument for why Joey is too high in the Rankings.  Cunning Stunts are undefeated and tied for the third best offense in the entire TSL (43.7 PPG); that, along with the fact that Mountain Dew Me has been very competitive in D2, would be the argument for why Joey deserves to be this high in the Rankings.  Plus, you know... we've watched him play.  He's really good at this game.  The Mountain Dew Me vs When Dove Cries game should be a classic next week:  just two savvy, aging veteran QBs (with approximately the same running speed these days) doing battle for D2 supremacy.  You won't want to miss it!

#6 Scott Drosendahl - Bullet Club - (Previous Rank #6)

Last Week:  Lost to When Dove Cries 23-22

Bullet Club is no longer undefeated, but Scotty's ranking doesn't change this week.  He's still the highest scoring QB in D2 (barely) at 34.7 PPG, and a one-point loss to STILL undefeated When Dove Cries isn't enough to sink this ship yet.  Bullet Club has the 7th ranked defense in their division at this point in the season, and the only three teams with worse defenses are a combined 0-8.  The fact that B.C. is a point away from being undefeated is a testament to their offense, and that's our justification for keeping Scotty at #6 this week.

#7 Dean Thompson - Peachy Platoon - (Previous Rank #12)

Last Week:  Beat XTC 46-34, beat Mountain Dew Me 32-25

This is why we try not to overreact to Week One losses in our Power Rankings.  Since dropping their opener to Losing Streak, Peachy Platoon is 3-0-1 and scoring 37.3 PPG, which would be best in their division.  If we include that opening loss (which of course, we do) the Platoon is second only to Bullet Club, by a single point.  No, not a single point per game, a single point TOTAL.  Come on.  If you've SEEN Dean play QB before, you knew it was only a matter of time before he surged back into the Top Ten; this is one of the best athletes in the League.  Top Five is next...

#8 Alex Buchlis - Sloppy Seconds - (Previous Rank #7)

Last Week:  Lost to Tight Ends in Motion 52-20, lost to Eyes Downtown 43-40

Buchlis being the only 0-4 QB in our Top Twenty this week is bound to annoy some quarterbacks who think they deserve his spot, especially given how much importance wins and losses are typically given in these Rankings.  Having said that, of the four games Sloppy Seconds have played this year, one has been against the #1 ranked QB, one has been against the #2 ranked QB, and TWO have been against the #3 ranked QB.  No, Topper did NOT do these guys any favors with the scheduling.  All Buchlis has done during that stretch is scored 19 against the Champs, 20 against TEIM (more than their other two opponents combined) and 21 then 40 against Eyes Downtown in their two matchups, nearly winning the second.  Is there a single quarterback below the #8 spot that would be better than 0-4 against this schedule?

#9 Patrick "Topper" McGovern - When Dove Cries / TOX - (Previous Rank #10)

Last Week:  Beat Bullet Club 23-22

Remember when the 2011 Denver Broncos put in a TERRIBLE Tim Tebow and somehow ripped off six wins in a row to shock the world?  We feel like we're seeing it again with When Dove Cries in the TSL.  After their resounding win over a "still struggling in D2" Scared Hitless, Team Topper has tied Peachy Platoon, beaten Losing Streak by 3, and beaten Bullet Club by 1.  When Dove Cries is the 5th ranked offense in their division and the 2nd ranked defense which is why we don't have Topper higher in our rankings, but he's making every play when it counts and turning back the clock to Fall of 2019 when he and Matty and Dean dominated D2.  Look at the standings now, and it's the same three QBs on top of the standings.  Pretty impressive for an elderly athlete, we think.

#10 Garrett Beesing - Frodo Swaggins - (Previous Rank #16)

Last Week:  Beat All We Do is Quinn 41-34

Frodo Swaggins lost Scotty Dro in free agency to Bullet Club and captain Garrett Beesing took over at QB.  This really felt like a "take a step backwards" season for Frodo... and yet they're undefeated with the fifth highest scoring team in the entire TSL (third highest if we exclude the top gender teams).  Wow.  They're not just beating bad teams either, as their latest win comes against D3 powerhouse All We Do is Quinn.  When was the last time those guys lost a regular season game?  Garrett Beesing, you have our attention, and you are officially one of the ten best quarterbacks in the TSL (at least, for now).  As we said last week for Vince, it's hard for a D3 team to climb much higher than 9th or 10th... but wouldn't it be amazing if he could catch #6 Scotty Drosendahl?  Not impossible...

So there's your Top Ten for the week.  We always try to expand throughout the season to give coverage to more and more of our players, so this week we've expanded to a Top Twenty.  This makes some people happy ("yay, they're talking about my team!") and some people very unhappy ("I'm not even top TWENTY?  I just assumed I was 11th!").  Don't like where you're ranked (or unranked)?  Write us an email and complain.  All we ask is that you don't try to justify why your QB should be higher than someone in a higher division, because that argument always goes the exact same way ("yes, you're doing very well, but you DO realize that defenses are a lot harder in higher divisions, right?").  With that said, let's take a look at QB's #11-#20.

#11 Vince Taverna - All We Do is Quinn - (Previous Rank #9)

Last Week:  Lost to Frodo Swaggins 41-34

Vince has been in our Top Ten for 19 consecutive weeks dating back to Week Six of the Spring 2019 season nearly two full years ago.  All good things must come to an end.  There was only room for one D3 QB in the Top Ten this week, and Garrett has a better record, better stats (5.0 PPG higher than Quinn's) and now a head to head win against AWDIQ.  No contest there.  We imagine Vince will bounce back quickly; anyone who has watched this team play knows how valuable a player he is.  D3 appears harder than ever this season though, so it might be a bumpier road to the playoffs than Quinn is used to.  The Angels and TopShot both look pretty legit, and with Frodo taking a big step forward this session, Quinn can't expect to dominate like they usually do.

#12 Matt Newman - Slytherin that end zone - (Previous Rank #15)

Last Week:  Beat Scared Hitless 31-7

Speaking of long Top Ten streaks recently broken, Newman's own 18 week streak (dating back a week BEFORE Vince's began) was broken at the start of this season when he missed the opener against A&A.  That wasn't punishment for missing a game (we try not to do that unless someone's attendance is REALLY bad), it was more a reflection of other great quarterbacks who have shined lately.  But Newman isn't going anywhere and has SITE back on track with a big win over Scared Hitless this week.  A&A is back, the "real" Peachy Platoon is back, and Topper seems to be back as well (for now) but none of these teams were 5 points away from winning the last D2 finals.  Slytherin was, and Newman's 1-0 start should remind other D2 teams that there's another serious contender in this already packed division.

#13 Brandt Dubey - XTC - (Previous Rank #7)

Last Week:  Lost to Peachy Platoon 46-34

Falling six spots this week is Dubey who played well in a losing effort against Peachy Platoon this week.  The Dilfs breakup has been hard for XTC apparently, as they're off to an 0-3 start this season.  Dubey will try to right the ship against Scared Hitless this week, which is essentially a must-win game for both teams.  Whoever starts 0-4 is unlikely to make the playoffs in this brutal division.  We're betting on XTC as their offense has been much stronger so far, but Scared Hitless have surprised us before (no, we're still not over last season's D3 Finals).

#14 Mike Thomas - Sticky Bandits - (Previous Rank #14)

Last Week:  DNP (forfeit win over Why So Serious?)

What a tragic start to the Sticky Bandits season.  After getting outscored 71-6 in the first two games of the season against last year's D1 finalists, Sticky Nation had a very winnable opportunity against Why So Serious in Week Three.  Unfortunately no one showed up for WSS, and the Sticky Bandits' first ever D1 win came by forfeit.  That's good news for their spot in the standings... bad news if they wanted to actually play a competitive football game.  Thomas still has only one TD through three weeks and Sticky is the lowest scoring team in the League, but we imagine few teams would do much better with their only games against Public Enemy and Tight Ends in Motion (the single hardest two game start imaginable).  We still think Mike is a top QB in this League, but the schedule hasn't given him many opportunities to prove it yet.

#15 Dylan Jaloza - TopShot - (Previous Rank #19)

Last Week:  Beat Wolfpack 46-14, beat Grey Hair - Don't Care 25-6

Dylan Jaloza was barely on our radar coming into this season despite QBing for one of the most talent stacked teams in D3 (any team with Chris Nelson should immediately be a contender).  The early results have been very strong though: TopShot is 3-0 with the 7th best offense in the League (5th best non-gender team) and they've scored only 7 fewer points than also undefeated Frodo Swaggins.  If Garrett's a Top Ten quarterback, and TopShot beats them this season... what does that make Dylan?  Impressive jump from D6 Tater Tots (is he still QBing there?  We hear he's part of a QB tandem?) to flirting with Top Ten status.  We've said it before and we'll say it many more times folks... the easiest path to shooting up the Power Rankings is to play in higher divisions (and win).

#16 Jordan Lawson - Losing Streak / Victorious Secret - (Previous Rank #13)

Last Week:  Lost to A&A 32-6 (Losing Streak), lost to Tater Tots 37-8 (Victorious Secret)

It was a rough week for Jordan's teams, who scored only 14 points over two losses.  But Losing Streak in particular had been doing better in previous weeks: they are still the only team to have beaten Peachy Platoon this session, and they HAD been averaging 35 PPG (which would have been best in D2 right now, if they hadn't run up against a brutal A&A defense this week).  The good news for Jordan is that Losing Streak started their schedule with games against the three best opponents in D2, so the schedule should get easier from here (as easy as any game can be in this division).  Next up is winless Passed Our Prime, quarterbacked by the next man on our Power Rankings

#17 Jeremy Olsen - Passed Our Prime - (Previous Rank #17)

Last Week:  DNP

Passed Our Prime had the week off so no updates on Olsen this week.  His incredibly successful Winter session team is off to a slow start this season as attendance issues have made it hard for him to compete with a full roster.  Every week the "where's Bloomfield?" questions get louder and louder, and if this team ever actually shows up, they're going to be hard to stop.

#18 Andy Clark - Buffalo Vice - (Previous Rank #21)

Last Week:  Beat Itches and Oh's 51-16

Buffalo Vice are the third highest scoring team in the TSL (tied with Cunning Stunts, the only team to have beaten them) at 43.7 PPG.  Andy's so consistent, and this team (be it "Vice" or "Solar Solutions") has always been successful when he plays.  They're ALSO the fifth best team in the TSL for total point differential per game right now, so they've got a defense that plays nearly as well as their offense, and that kind of balance makes them one of a few legit contenders for the D4 championship this season.  Expect a fairly large betting line for the Buffalo Vice vs TOX game this week.

#19 Brandon "B" Ford - Practice Squad - (Previous Rank #22)

Last Week:  Beat Jabronies 31-28, beat Cobblestone 40-8

Other than a blowout loss to Buffalo Vice a couple weeks ago (and some losses to Mountain Dew Me in D5 last season... remember when these teams played in D5???) Practice Squad has been dominant, and they're 2-1 to start the Spring 2021 season as well.  B dismantled the veterans of Cobblestone by 32 points, and beat former Top Ten QB Joe Miano the same afternoon.  Expect another great season from Renee's squad and nothing but consistent excellence from B.

#20 Joe Miano - Jabronies - (Previous Rank #20)

Last Week:  Beat TOX 38-28, lost to Practice Squad 31-28

The Jabronies were a play away from the D2 Finals last session, but life changes pretty quickly.  Ben Stack, Eric Kleckler, Amy Taylor and others are gone, and the Jabronies have retooled as a D4 team seemingly starting over. Joe Miano has the confidence from playing in upper divisions though, and he knows he can beat just about anybody.  His squad is off to a 1-2 start, but as long as they have Joe (and Ryan) we expect they'll be competitive every week, especially as Joe starts to gel with his new receivers.

***

Pointless Power Ranking of the Week

Our long-time readers know that we like to include charts and graphs at the end of our Power Rankings showing how our teams stack up against each other.  Well, it's a little early in the session for all that, so in the meantime, let's keep ranking something pointless (as opposed to the "serious" business of QB rankings of course).  

Last week the Power Rankings Committee voted on the Top Ten best free agent acquisitions, and before that the Top Ten best team names. Each week we'll try to look at something different.

Here are your Top Ten Best Female Pass Rushers this Spring 2021 season, as voted on by our Committee (in the interests of creating suspense, we'll count down from Ten):

"Is Maggie even PLAYING this session?"  Doesn't matter, she's the "GOAT" of pass rushing, and we're not going to publish a list of pass rushers and NOT include her at the top.

**

Final Observations

• There are nine undefeated teams remaining, including Public Enemy and Tight Ends in Motion (D1), A&A and When Dove Cries (D2), TopShot, The Angels and Frodo Swaggins (D3), Cunning Stunts (D4), and Zack Attack (D5).  There are no undefeated teams remaining in D6.
• There are ten winless teams remaining, including Sloppy Seconds and Why So Serious? (D1), Passed Our Prime, XTC and Scared Hitless (D2), Vaspian and Grey Hair - Don't Care (D3), University Wealth Management (D5), and Juiced and Victorious Secret (D6).  There are no winless teams remaining in D4.
• Only two of last season's champions (Public Enemy and The Angels) remain undefeated this season.  The combined record of the other four division champions is 3-8, and none of those teams have a winning record (Mountain Dew Me is 1-1).
• The longest winning streak in the League belongs to Public Enemy (8 games, dating back to last Fall).
• The longest losing streak in the League belongs to Why So Serious (5 games, dating back to last Fall) if we stick purely with teams that haven't changed names.  If we recognize University Wealth Management from this session as Intentional Pounding from last session (it's the same people...) then the longest losing streak in the League belongs to them (12 games, dating back to last Fall).

And that's it for this week!  As always, if you have any thoughts on why you hate this article (your team’s QB should be ranked higher?  your rusher is WAY better than the girls we listed here?  you're ready for the "best offenses / best defenses" charts that we're so famous for?) please send an email to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..   

What’s YOUR ranking?

• Prev
• Next