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THE SENTINEL:  WEEK 5

Seemed like yesterday we were talking about week 1 but here we are halfway through the regular season. Week 4 had its fair share of upsets, nail biters and blow outs. I highlighted the names of teams to make it easier for those of you who only care about whether your team was mentioned. To give credit where it’s due I did steal this idea from The Build, but he stole my colored signature line idea so now we’re square. Let’s get right into it.

Our first upset of the game was at 9am in Breakfast Club when Natural Born Kellers took on undefeated Schilling Em Softly. SES was missing QB Matty Ice so Kyle Conniff took the rock. Not a bad back up QB but now you’re missing WR1. History has shown us sometimes the best drafted teams in BC are the ones who show up and attendance won this game for NBK. Topper and Katie Keller’s crew put up 22 points to SES’s 0. Hopefully the cast and crew of SES will return for next week.

Peanut Butter Kelly Time and Bern Them All played a high scoring game with another bra and a bucket of mimosas on the line. Newman had some solid throws but canceled them out with a couple picks. Jamy played awesome but PBKT appeared to be missing quite a few players as well, including fan favorite 40 year plan guy. BTA also had some attendance issues among their guys. Travis Clev threw for most of the game then gave Rawdog a chance to show his stuff. Rumor around the locker room is the backup QB position for BTA is still up for grabs…

Hot TaMolly’s and EmC HammerTime came down to the wire and ended on a questionable missed call involving Boccio and a female receiver. This scenario sounds familiar. HTM had Garrett back and looking healthy after being placed on IR last week. Joe Schwab had an impressive deep catch that had ECHT asking themselves “Who was that guy?”. Ricky Austin wasn’t afraid to let it fly either and having Drew there to go get those jump balls made for an exciting match. After losing this game by 1 point, I’m sure ECHT is itching for a rematch. I know I am.

Word around the fields was Public Enemy was more worried about this game versus Marketing Mayors than last week’s big rivalry match up against Eyes Downtown. And for good reason. MM are an experienced team and know that it’s not over til it’s over. PE was up 2 scores when Cole threw a pick allowing MM to get within range. MM had a chance to win it but Bermel was ruled out of bounds ending the game in favor of PE 40-32. PE’s defense played outstanding and Carissa from MM looked to be in top form.

In C2, Money Ball took on a very short-handed Bullet Club. Jeff Easton has yet to make an appearance, however, Paul Nieman made his return to the fields. Travis Clev was back throwing for BC while MB went with backup QB Scotty Pinto in the absence of Glowacki. The game could easily be described as the Radon Show. Clearly Pinto’s favorite target, Radon was all over the field and received the vast majority of throws. BC didn’t have an answer for MB’s speed and Tim Dove drew up plays to capitalize. MB got its first win 34-23, despite a tension-filled ending to the game.

XTC and 1 Todd 2 Many played in what should have been a good game provided everyone had all their weapons. Unfortunately this was not the case for 1T2M. They were missing Pete, Sal, Nixon and Salvati meaning Topper had to play defense. To add insult to injury, Nick Sooch made his debut for XTC. Sooch picked up right where he left off, orchestrating his offense and dropping dimes on WRs who have been waiting ever so patiently for a QB who can get them the ball. No disrespect to 1T2M but I was rooting for XTC in this one as it was Coach Jay’s first win of the season and no one deserved a win more than him. 1T2M played Tight Ends in Motion later in the day with the same result. Walking around the sideline of this game, it just felt blah. Rough day to have a double header. Ricky Austin made his C1 debut for the season at QB while Alex is still on IR. Alex was watching intently from the sidelines. I don’t want to take anything away from TEIM as they played a good game and put up 39 points. Their play calling was spot on as we’ve come to expect and Lindsey showed off her shiftiness. Next week’s game against PE will be a big test to see where they belong in this division.

Hung Buffalo had a big day winning both of their back-to-back games. First up, they took it to Full Throttle allowing only 16 points while scoring 35. HB QB (Mark, I believe, correct me if I’m wrong) knows how to utilize all his players. This is a team that really has all the pieces together. A QB who knows the game, talented receivers and solid girls. Sounds like a winning formula to me. They played Cobblestone immediately following their win against FT and may have been a little gassed as the game was closer than expected. Cobblestone repeatedly left HB’s Kate wide open in the middle and she did what she does and caught the shit out of the ball. Cobblestone introduced some new girls, Taylor and Dyshawna (there was one more but I didn’t catch the name). Taylor is new to football but you’d never know it watching her play. Darryl definitely found some talent this time with his girls and he has his usual guys. My humble advice for CB: play to your strengths. Use Big Rig’s and Darryl’s nephews’ height and let them make plays.

Full Throttle and Buffalo Solar Solutions both went 0-2 on the day bumping the latter down from first to 5th place. BSS could not seem to get anything going during their game against GLBS and GLBS was rolling. QB Josh looked in control the whole game and made some clutch throws. There is no shortage of athleticism and speed on this team. Damico (#15) had a great pick and Jay Elphick was a nightmare for BSS’ defense. Glenn proved his worth on both sides of the ball, making great catches and huge stops on defense. I’ve never noticed Jenna with the pink headband before today but that girl has skill. She’s quick and has hands to boot. BSS needs to right the ship but this coming week will be no walk in the park with End Game coming to town.

Full Throttle came up against End Game this week in what was a back and forth battle up until the end of the game when EG went up 11 at the 2 minute warning. Lou has some athletes on his team but he’s got to recognize when players are open sooner. He spent way too much time scrambling around waiting for plays to develop. EG had a huge girl edge with Steph and Purdy; however, Dave waited until he had to go to a girl and got into multiple 3-2 and 4-2 situations. Come on Dave, if you want to make the QB Power Ranking you need to be smarter.

Pink Pteratacos played Hope N Ruin in a close game that came down to the wire. PP QB Joe and captain Mark have come a long way from a couple seasons ago. Mark’s scouting has seemingly paid off as he has talented girls and guys all over the field. He also seems to be keeping his composure more, although winning tends to have that effect. HNR on the other hand, need to take a step back and gain some composure before heading into next week. Losing by 1 point is never fun and HNR did everything they could to pull this out. Their guys were lying out to make the catch and break up plays on defense every time I turned around. Nicole had a great game and made some nice catches. But guys, yelling at your QB that he just needs to throw you the ball every play and pointing fingers at your teammates probably isn’t the best strategy. Also, it makes you look like an asshole. Just something to keep in mind next game.

I’d like to start by apologizing to Frodo SWAGGins for getting their name wrong in my write up Week 1. My bad guys. There were some familiar faces in the ranks for FS this week. Nick and Tammy made an appearance as well as Emily Schilling who left End Game at the roster submission deadline. Sources say she was unhappy with the amount of girls on EG’s roster so negotiated with a team that offered more playing time. FS got their first win of the season against 3rd and Schlong, who were missing 40 year plan guy. They looked cohesive in their offense, particularly at the end when they scored 3 girl TDs, and were able to make some key stops defensively. While predominantly new faces, it appears Garrett has scouted himself a solid team and I wouldn’t be surprised to see them rise in the rankings as the season progresses. Austin Weber had another big day on offense for 3&S as did Nicole Keller. 3&S currently sit second in the R1 division but looking at the standings and the way the games have been played, the division is wide open with 1 of several teams battling it out to face, most likely, All We Do Is Quinn in the finals.

The Cunning Stunts bested HomeTech 26-1 in what may be a league record for the first team to ever score just 1 point thanks to a returned 1-point conversion. HomeTech could not adjust to the methodical offense of CS. Jamy was consistently left wide open no matter where she was; side line, mid field, end zone, there she was with no one within an 8 foot radius. Austin tried his damnedest but could not seem to connect with his WRs despite the best efforts from Pick-1 guy. They also had a guy go off the field injured who did not return to the game.

Five Star Generals played Cunning Stunts at noon and reports were heard that Joey Batts was intimidated by the athletes on that team. Luckily for Batts, the Generals did not utilize their assets as they should. Guys, you have probably the best receiver in R3 in that tall guy with the white long sleeves on your team and you target him 3 times, why? Play smarter people. 5SG went on to play Come From Behind, who appeared to be missing some guys later in the day. QB Paul was not in attendance so one of the young guns stepped up to fill his shoes. He had some highlight worthy throws, particularly one to Jenn Stachura but defensively they could not keep up with the athletes of 5SG. “Gronk” looked unstoppable no matter who CFB lined up against him and intimidation was definitely a factor when he rushed. CFB’s girls are familiar faces to anyone who’s been around the league and they all had some notable plays during the game. 5SGs were able to pick apart CFB’s defense though and took the W 42-31.

Vandalay industries took on Hope N Ruin at 2:00 after HNR’s loss to Pink Pteratacos. HNR was able to regain composure enough to pull out a win but there was still bickering going on amongst the team. VI couldn’t do anything on defense. They have athletes but can’t seem to figure out how to put it together. Kyle made some decent plays for them but they are going to need to get some stops if they want to add to their win column. Being held off from scoring in the second half isn’t going to help the cause either.



~ courtesy of...The Sentinel

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