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- Written by Jeff Krol
- Category: TSL QB Power Rankings
- Published: 16 May 2024
- Created: 16 May 2024
- Hits: 230
Welcome back to the TSL Quarterback Power Rankings!
SO many storylines to wade through this week, so let's just get to it:
#1 Mike Thomas - Sticky Bandits
Last Week: Beat Eyes Uptown 28-26
#2 Bobby McConnell - Eyes Downtown
Last Week: Lost to Frodo Swaggins 37-25
#3 Joey Batts - Eyes Uptown / Cunning Stunts
Last Week: Beat Frodo Swaggins 28-15, lost to Sticky Bandits 38-26 (Eyes Uptown), beat ILF 34-14, beat PWI 43-20
#4 Garrett Beesing - Frodo Swaggins
Last Week: Beat Eyes Downtown 37-25, lost to Eyes Uptown 28-15
Let's just do all four D1 quarterbacks at once. LOOK HOW EVEN THIS DIVISION IS!
The graph above shows each division's BEST average point differential per game vs the division's WORST average point differential per game. So if the best team is winning by an average of 7 points per game, and the worst team is losing by an average of -10 points per game, the difference between those numbers is 17. Notice anything different about D1? These four teams are playing INCREDIBLY tight games right now, and it's by FAR the closest division in the TSL from top to bottom (Breakfast Club excluding Jeneva Conventions was pretty close too, but if we include EVERY team in that division, the total score is still almost three times higher than D1). Eyes Downtown, Eyes Uptown and Frodo Swaggins are all 1-1 against each other, and all three teams have lost to Sticky Bandits... by between 2 and 4 points. EVERY team in this division is either in first place (Sticky Bandits) or one TD against Sticky Bandits AWAY from being in first place. That's parity, folks.
So how do you rank Quarterbacks when every team is essentially the same? Mike Thomas is an easy #1 by virtue of winning all those close games. We've got Bobby #2 because he leads the division in scoring. We've got Joey #3 because a) he beat Garrett head to head and b) the Stunts have been incredible. But the difference between Mike and Garrett is so small, this really MIGHT be the TSL's best division (if not its lamest, for having four teams and multiple suspensions).
#5 Jordan Lawson - Mavericks
Last Week: Tied Untouchaballs 31-31
They say ties are like "kissing your sister"... but hey, maybe the Mavericks don't mind the incest that much this week. They remain unbeaten on the season (and in both games against the reigning division champion), and ensure they'll have the tiebreaker over Untouchaballs if it comes down to it. There are worse things in life. D1 crossover games are coming in a few weeks, and we wouldn't be shocked if Mavericks pulls off the upset in those.
#6 Dylan Day - Scared Hitless
Last Week: Beat Freeballers 39-25
Scared Hitless is STILL undefeated on the season after coasting to another win against Freeballers on Saturday. They're 3-0, but they haven't faced either Mavericks or Untouchaballs yet. Is this just lucky scheduling, or do they belong in the conversation for D2 favorites?
#7 Jeremy Burr - Untouchaballs
Last Week: Tied Mavericks 31-31, beat Can't Touch This 32-26
Untouchaballs get a BIT of redemption this week by proving they can, in fact, hang with the Mavericks, and then beating Can't Touch This to go 2-1-1. We tend to think the big loss was a fluke and this team will be playing for the D2 championship in just over a month.
#8 David Eickhoff - Freeballers
Last Week: Beat Puckett All-Stars 34-24, lost to Scared Hitless 39-25
Was Eickhoff there or not there on Saturday? We've heard conflicting reports. His Power Ranking remains unchanged though as Freeballers go 1-1 on the day.
#9 Andy Strug - The Malones
Last Week: Beat Buffalo Vice 54-32
It's probably way past time that Andy Strug finds his way into the Top Ten. The Malones lead the ENTIRE TSL in points per game through three weeks (two games for them) at an astonishing 51 PPG. No, they haven't played Wanderers or Keller Whales yet, and yes, they're opponents are a combined 1-6. But they don't control who they play, and they've absolutely killed every defense they've seen this session.
#10 Frank Laudico - Wanderers
Last Week: Beat Topper All Stars & Todd 45-26
Who had "Frank Laudico vs Brandt Dubey" on their bingo card for 2024? What a random dream matchup that we never knew we needed. Of course Frank had the advantage of playing for a locked in Wanderers team while Dubey came out of retirement to play for someone else's team, so the outcome was never in doubt. Wanderers are 3-0 and sixth in the League in scoring.
#11 Ryan Dougherty - Can't Touch This
Last Week: Lost to Untouchaballs 32-26
The losing streak continues for Can't Touch This as they dropped another one on Saturday to Untouchaballs. Two of their losses this season (including this week's) have been by one score, so at least they've been competitive. But at some point they need to win some games for "the guy everyone pretty much agrees LOOKS like the best QB in the League" to jump back into the Top Ten.
#12 Theo Russell - Puckett All-Stars
Last Week: Lost to Freeballers 34-24
The Sentinel says Puckett played with a backup QB this week, so maybe this one's not on Theo. We're telling you, their first D2 win is coming soon!
#13 Damien Keller - Keller Whales
Last Week: Did Not Play
No game for the Keller Klan this week.
#14 Brandon "B" Ford - Practice Squad / Tater Tots
Last Week: Beat Bullet Club 39-26 (Practice Squad), beat Cobblestone 38-25 (Tater Tots)
B's teams last session were a combined 4-14. This season he's already off to a combined 6-1, and that doesn't even include a huge breakfast club comeback a couple weeks ago. Practice Squad and the Tots are two of the nicer teams in the League, so everyone on our Committee loves that their having success this season.
#15 Joe Miano - Jabronies
Last Week: Beat Let's Get Reccked 28-22
The Jabronies picked up their first win of the season in style Saturday over their old rivals from Let's Get Reccked. Eric Kleckler's pot kicking shenanigans often overshadow the heroics of his star QB, so let's take a moment to remember that Joe Miano is pretty f'ing good at this.
#16 Alex Buchlis - Let's Get Reccked
Last Week: Lost to Jabronies 28-22
The only thing worse than a loss is a loss to your rivals. Let's Get Reccked were missing a bunch of people on Saturday which makes a big difference (plus Garrett did not exactly look his best running around out there) but either way, they can't be too happy to be sitting at 1-3... especially with their next two opponents currently a combined 5-1.
#17 Andy Clark - Buffalo Vice
Last Week: Lost to The Malones 54-32
Buffalo Vice is 1-3 since winning D4 and making the jump to D3. We tend to give rising teams like Vice a bit of a pass their first season, as it usually takes time to adjust to the faster play of a higher division. Having the sixth worst defense in the TSL to date probably doesn't help.
#18 Dylan Jaloza - Bullet Club
Last Week: Lost to Practice Squad 39-26
Bullet Club is actually 16th in the League in scoring right now. That's the good news! The bad news: they are dead last in defense, and the only team in the TSL giving up more than 40 PPG. D3 is a fun division though, and the talent disparity from top to bottom really doesn't look like it should be THAT severe. We wouldn't count these guys out from making a run in the playoffs.
#19 Mitchell Bennett - Creekers
Last Week: Beat Reset Warriors 35-8
The Creekers were once a winless D4 team that dropped down to D5 and immediately won that championship. Now they're back in D4, and this time they're playing with confidence. Mitch has his team 9th in the TSL in scoring, and they're one of only three teams in the division with a winning record.
#20 Ethan Herbold - Interdimensional Lightning Falcons
Last Week: Lost to Cunning Stunts 34-14, beat PWI 48-47
We're not sure what to make of the ILFers this session. A 48-47 win over PWI is incredible... but their only other win was against newcomers The Roaring 20s, and both of their losses weren't particularly close. This was a team many had pegged to challenge the Stunts for the D4 championship this season, but a 20 point loss on Saturday probably doesn't inspire much confidence.
Fancy Statistics Section
Alright FINE. Ten of the teams in this League are already halfway through the season, so I guess we're far enough along that we can give you a graph and not have it be TOTALLY meaningless.
Inspired by the D1 graph above, here is EVERY team in the League and their average point differential per game (in other words, how much they're winning by, or losing by, per game). Teams in the Green are winning (on average), teams in the Red are losing:
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That's it for the TSL Power Rankings this week! As we said above, we don't currently have our own email address anymore, so if you have any thoughts about QB rankings, or you want to make sure we know who's throwing for your team, please feel free to contact our good friend This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
What's YOUR ranking?
