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Week #1 has come and gone. Enter Week #2. What shall we do for an encore ? If you are Team Topper or HATBF or Joey Batts you are very happy. If you are Dark Knights or SITE or The Replacements you are very sad. Mother nature has finally arrived just in the nick of time. Good luck to all our players this week. 

 

And don't forget for the love of all that is decent and holy. This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. before Friday at 10am

 

Let's pick some games shall we......

 

DIVISION #1

ANGRY BUFFALO +7 VS PUBLIC ENEMY:  PE looked awful in week #1 but they were missing essentially their entire secondary. We found out Ryan Radke is really good. This is important as Delano is very good as well. AB gave New Gods a game but fell flat vs the Mayors. This game could be interesting. If I was PE I would rush a guy and dare AB to beat you with their girls. I also would man them up all day and force them to beat you to the ball. Nick Sooch is awesome and will keep his team in every game they play. I am hearing quiet grumbles one of the best female players in league history might be making her return this week.  PUBLIC ENEMY BY 6

 #XTC +8 VS MARKETING MAYORS: MM did not look overly comfortable last week as they were missing one of their franchise players. This will cause havoc for them as you now can pick a side and attack it on defense. #XTC is a solid bunch with good players, good people and they have talent. What they don't have is a D1 QB. #XTC must find a QB. They tried Bartholomew Novak Cassius Igor Sheamus Michael Murray in the winter but that didn't work. If #XTC finds a QB they can win some games. The new mantra VS MM will simply be find Andy Smith then go the complete opposite way of Smith. Andy Smith should win D1 defensive MVP just because anyone smart just wont throw his way when there are better places to attack.   MARKETING MAYORS BY 7

EYES DOWNTOWN VS NEW GODS +3: New Gods burst onto the scene and shocked ED last season. They did it by being smart and manning ED which caused them fits. I'm still shocked more people don't do this. Bobby panics when he sees a man as he is a surgeon against a zone. There is no doubt in my mind and with an even more improved secondary that New Gods will man ED up. If they fluster them again then every team that doesn't man this team will be a dolt if you ask me. Bobby must understand that he is heading into a firestorm and be ready for it. You beat a man by spreading out the field laterally and using the width of the field to your advantage. This game should be a war but I cant help but think in a game like this that the team with the better QB wins late. I expect a close one here.  EYES DOWNTOWN BY 1

 

 

DIVISION  #2

NWO VS THE REPLACEMENTS +8: It just seems simple to me. If you have franchise player that is basically un-coverable just throw him the ball...right? Well tell the Replacements that. TR Jeremy Burr is really good throw him the damn ball. If you don't you will lose this week then the week after and the week after that. NWO is very good. They have some players and they have some very solid girls. NWO could be the D2 dark horse this session. Brother Nero has a chip on his shoulder. I expect a great game that is if TR quits being so damn stubborn and feeds Burr the damn ball. BTW I'm guessing in the next few weeks we will be talking more and more about the talented lady players on NWO.   NWO BY 10

 

HOOTIE AND THE BRO FISH VS GRYFFINDOR +3: HATBF took D2 by storm last week as they looked really good. This week the TSL MVP of everything shows up. This is a great test for HATBF. Gryffindor is solid everywhere and will pose a tough test. I am hearing HATBF have a very under rated girl that many will know about by seasons end. No I am not talking about Mary Poppins. If Bro wants to take his place amongst the immortals of this game and its rich history he must climb the mountain high and he must slay the Dragon Battagalia. It will not be easy but to be the best you must beat the best. When I see this match up I can't help but think of the brother battles on each side of the field. What must it be like to be held back by your brother? Poor Bro....Poor Brother Nero. This has to be the week both shine. It just has to....  HOOTIE AND THE BRO FISH BY 4

 

DIVISION #3 

50-1 MORNING WOOD +4 VS BULLET CLUB: OK great you beat a team with 5 players Morning Wood well done. Test #2 shall be a bit more difficult. Bullett Club is a totally different beast. Their girls are flat out solid, their QB can sling and their supporting cast is very good. MW will need to bring it this week. Are they 50-1.? No ..no they are not but are they a threat to the D3 title? We will find out this week. Beating 5 players is one thing but if MW can walk out of town this week with a W they will start to get our attention. BULLET CLUB BY 6 

SLYTHERIN IN THE END ZONE +10 VS CINTAS: It has become painfully obvious to this writer that JZ was in fact the brains of this operation. When he left SITE was scuhhhhhhrewed. It was bad last week but what happens this week when the TSL's bad boy and MVP comes to town? SITE without JZ's leader ship and mental prowess will be out matched, out classed, out gunned and obviously out JZ'd. Joey Batts will smell blood in the water and should make quick work of this rudderless ship.  CINTAS BY 13 

COBBLESTONE FEATURING DARRYL CARR QB SUPERSTAR VS 1 TOPPER TOO MANY +38: Here we go again it's Battle of the Immortals Round #17. These two teams know each other and know each other well. Team Topper got a big win last week but many people think their team is loaded and quiet grumbles are being made that all 1TTM players are now taking performing enhancing drugs and Topper is on 4 different types of steroids. Drew (boooo) is really good. Darryl Carr QB Superstar knows his foe well. His team always comes to play in Topper week but who is in charge of their roster? You cant show up with 1 girl. C'mon man!!!! CS must circle the wagons and make sure all 6 people show up this week. I just fear that all the performance enhancing drugs Team Topper is on will propel them to great things this session.  TT has a big girl edge this week lets see if they attack Cobblestone with it.   1 TOPPER TOO MANY BY 7

A&A VS MIXXX +3: A&A took an early season L last week. They didn't score a ton and looked sorta flat. Mixxx was in the same boat as they struggled to score. In match ups like this you always look at the QB's first. One has Matty Ice and one does not so who should we go with? I keep hearing the same thing over and over. Tammy could be the early season favorite for most improved. I keep hearing girl catches everything thrown at her. Mixxx needs to simplify this week. When you struggle to score dumb down the play book and everything will slow down with it. A&A is a fast squad and the weather is nice so Mixxx better be ready to run this week. A&A BY 6 

STICKY BANDITS VS PUCKETT ALL STARS +8: RPAS did not get off to a great start last week but who can fault them they had to take on Batman. SB got the W last week but 17 points isn't going to cut it if you want a D3 title. SB played stout defense but they need to get into the low mid 20s each week if they want to get to the top of the D3 mountain. RPAS will take some time to gel as the game in D3 is way faster than it was in D4. RPAS have talent, a strong armed QB and decent girls. They just need time to develop. This will be a solid test for them this week as SB is as systematic and methodical as they come. SB does not make a ton of mistakes. If you want to beat SB you need to bring it. Can RPAS bring it? I think they can but I don't think they will until week 4 or 5. They need more time... STICKY BANDITS BY 7

 

DIVISION #4

BREW CREW +10 VS UNCLE RICO'S TIME TRAVELERS: URTT had a terrible week #1. They got pummeled by Team Keller then rumors continue to swirl that Jonn Senn is the God Father. I can't believe I just talked about myself in the 3rd person like that. BC better be ready to go as I am fearing URTT will come to town hopping mad this week and would like nothing better than to show all of D4 that last week a fluke and that they are D4 title material.BC appears to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.  URTT BY 9

SHREDDERS VS INDECENT EXPOSURE +7: Shredders looked good last week as they beat Full Throttle. IE is a very balanced very methodical team that probably wont beat you long. Shredders can get torched long and deep over the middle so this team is a great match for them as IE will not go long or deep over the middle. They will try to stay conservative with simple 6-10 yd routes and get gains that way. I see Shredders opening things up a but and just having a little more than IE has and taking this late.  SHREDDERS BY 6

BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS +1 VS INDECENT EXPOSURE: BSS is the old AARP they should match up well this week with a team that plays very similar to themselves. Each team is solid on both sides of the ball. Each team has decent QBs and decent role players. each team has solid girls. I expect a good old fashioned slobberknocker in this one. I am only taking IE because I never take AARP slash BSS. IE should win this one as they will make less mistakes than their opponents.  INDECENT EXPOSURE BY 3

BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS +6 VS 3RD AND SCHLONG : OMG 3rd and Schlong laid the smacketh downeth on URTT last week. They were firing on all cylinders. Sr was dealing, Jr was solid, 40 yr plan guy looked a step quicker hell even Kevin Freakin Keller was making plays. It appears the fair maiden Katie Keller only fell in love like 7x last week so even she kept things professional. 3AS looked awesome and they should win again this week. BSS is up and down but they don't have the horses to go with Team Keller. The Keller Nation will once again rise above and dismantle any/all challengers they face. That is unless Katie Keller falls in love with someone on BSS and is all like "OMG don't beat them because I love so and so on BSS." If you love him run to him Katie Keller.  3RD AND SCHLONG BY 7

FULL THROTTLE +7 VS HK4:  HK4 is always in the mix in D4. FT looked pretty solid last week but they must shore up the D. You can't give up 31 and expect to win more than you lose. FT is a very good team so HK4 better be ready to go. I always  say the team with the bye never comes to town in their first game and looks good so HK4 better beware of the upset. FT will score some points but HK4 has a ton of horses on offense and should carry late. HK4 BY 3

 

DIVISION #5

CUNNING STUNTS VS MATTY'S ANGELS PICK EM: You would think this will be a fun game between two solid squads. I am not so sure. I think one player is sitting in a dark room plotting and planning. This man has been held back for years. He could be the best player in D3 hell he could even be a solid guy in D1. Yet he stays in D3 and stays quiet. He always deep down has wanted to lead a team.  Now is his chance. Don't let him fool you. He will tell you he is here for fun but he's here for a different reason. He wants the fame, glory and notoriety that comes with being a successful QB in this league. It's eating him up inside he knows it and I know it. I haven't seen such a burning desire to be loved in this league since a young Mike Boccio graced us with his presence many moons ago. And if that means he has to grab a gender team and throw them on his back in D5 that is exactly what he will do. Will Drew (booooooo) fulfill his destiny and satisfy his hunger to be the best or will the Angels have something to say about that ?  MATTY'S ANGELS BY 3

HOPE N RUIN VS WITTERS +7: Witter's did not look good in week #1 but newbs usually don't.  It takes 3-5 weeks to gel. You need to learn the rules and the players and the refs. Most show up and think they can just chuck and duck and its all good. Well it doesn't work that way. It takes time, it takes practice. In due time Witters will improve. HNR is a very solid football team that will show up each and every week. Witter's will improve week after week. I am not so sure they are ready for this test.....yet.  HOPE N RUIN BY 6

COME FROM BEHIND VS THE BAMBS +1: I was all over the Bambs this season and all in but then I heard something startling. They aren't your same old Bambs. C'mon guys if this league can forgive B's Brother than you guys can forgive and forget. CFB is a finely tuned machine. They are the excellence of execution. They should take TB to school this week. Both teams are quite balanced but this game is won and lost at QB....Let he without sin cast the first stone Bambs. An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind Bambs. If you choose not to decide you still have made  a choice Bambs.   Come from Behind BY 3

PASSLESS CHAPS +11 VS THE TOMMY HUGHES EXPERIENCE: THE is off to another solid session. PC however is not. PC needs to score more. Yes THE is famously slow and they can be exploited by speed teams but does PC have the speed or the know how to get behind a very forgiving secondary? I didn't think so either. THE will probably do what they normally do. They will complete like 50 passes for like an average of like 6 yards per and they will win by 10-14 points. THE BY 10

UFO +10 VS ALL WE DO IS QWINN: So it looks like AWDIQ are trying to be the 'bad boys of D5." I am sure Hung Buffalo will have something to say about that. UFO should not be in D5. I don't think they are ready. Yes UFO are a great bunch and yes it will pain this writer to have to sit through this season with them but I fear UFO will have a very long session. AWDIQ is very quick and very chippy. This game could get interesting. If AWDIQ tried to run a girl team last week I can't even imagine what they have planned this week. ALL WE DO IS QWINN BY 8

HUNG BUFFALO VS VANDALAY INDUSTRIES +13: Umm yeah well VI played last week. I liked the Walter/Scinta Safety Buddy Connection last week. VI will not win many games but oh will they have fun. HB will try to thug it up but VI is so much fun they will have no choice but to succumb to their charisma and love for this game. This game will be a route but it will be a fun route. I hope HB plays attention and sees how much fun VI has as HB need a reboot. They need to get back to having fun not trying to bring hell fire and brimstone with them each and every week. Maybe Pauly Scinta can bring them some cheese and show them the way.  HUNG BUFFALO BY 14

 

DIVISION #6

DARK KNIGHTS +4 VS NICE TDS: DK struggled in week #1. I do see talent. What I do not see is a team that understand this game yet. You must not get caught in 4th and 2 DK did this like 7x in 2 games last week. You need to get your girls the ball DK last week did not do this. Most importantly DK needs to throw out their playbook and their arm bands and simplify. Go run 6-9 yard routes and just go play pitch and catch. This team has no clue what they are looking at or what they are playing against until they do those plays on their wrists mean nothing. Go find a mismatch and exploit it. Stop the long ball crap and go get 6-9 yards. Until they do that they will lose more games than they win. NICE TDS BY 7

COLLEGIATE BUILDERS +8 VS DILLY DILLY: I have no clue who Dilly Dilly is. Even though I have no clue who Dilly Dilly is I am still going with them over Collegiate Builders. CB is struggling and a win would be so nice for their franchise but until I see steps forward I just can't go with them. That's why I am going with a team I have never ever seen before. DILLY DILLY BY 7

HOMETECH +6 VS THE PRACTICE SQUAD: Hometech won and that was good. This is season 3 of TPS. They did bad in season 1 took a huge step season 2 and I think they have arrived season 3. They have now learned the game and continue to get better and better week after week. TPSD will have a huge girl advantage this week and will be able to exploit it. HT is a decent team but lacks top shelpf speed. TPS has some burners so they should be able to take this one. I don't expect a blow out but I do see TPS taking this one. THE PRACTICE SQUAD 7

CELINO SEWER RATS VS TIGHT END ZONES +7: TEZ got a big week #1 win but they did not look fast or sharp at all. CSR looked to be in mid season form. They were all over Hometech last week and should be all over TEZ this week. CSR has some speed and should be able to exploit a very slow secondary. TEZ will not be able to run with CSR and this will be a big issue. I expect CSR to put at least 30 up this week. I am starting to think CSR is the D6 favorite right now. CELINO SEWER RATS BY 10

THE MCKEZNIE AGENCY VS JABRONIES +8: TMA is back and that's a good thing for the TSL. Brent's smile should return, Ferger's moon shine should return as TMA is easily one of our favorite teams in this league.  Jabronies didn't look to bad last week as they lost 36-28. They got the offensive side of it down they just need to get the defensive side under wraps. Ferger is a gun slinger so this one should be interesting. I always think the team with the week off is at a disadvantage but TMA are now seasoned vets as they know this game and know it well. They should carry. THE MCKENZIE AGNECY BY 8

 

 

5 QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

1. Seriously what kind of coaching techniques is Coach Jay using with all these brunette girls? I keep hearing Coach Jay is using these top secret Eastern European coaching methods and any/all girls with brown hair are improving their football technique by leaps and bounds. Well proof is in the pudding as we will finally get to answer the simplest of questions Saturday who is better the blonde or the brunette? I mean yeah you could have a charity football game and stuff orrrrrrrrrr you could just have Emily fight Shari in a steel cage and answer the same darn question. I obviously am not one to talk so you didn't hear that from me :)

2.  So who will win this week Bobby or the man defense? Bobby is up against it as he will be put to the test early and often by New Gods as they will force him to beat them.  Eyes Down Town for the first time in a while will be feeling some pressure this week. 

3. Does Slytherin in the End Zone fatally regret getting rid of the brains of the operation when they fired JZ? It sure looks like they could use him right now. 

4. Could a passing of the torch be happening this week at 2:00 on field #1 when HATBF face Gryffidnor? Is Joey Batts going to hand his title to Bro? Not without a fight if you ask me. You must thinking the same thing I am.....brother tag team Texas tornado match. Bro and Brother Nero vs Joey Batts and the Klecky Guy. This game could be alot of fun to watch this week. 

5. Will The Replacements quit fooling around and just throw Burr the damn ball? I mean seriously if you have a Ferrari in the garage you don't throw a cover over it you take that shit out and you drive it. C'mon TR get with the program and get Burr the damn ball. 

 

 

10 final thoughts before game day

1. The game I have my eye on is in D5 at 10 AM when we have our female battle for all the marbles. In one corner we have Matty's Angel's former D6 champs that have been together for a while now. In the other corner we have Cunning Stunts who are anchored by...Drew (boooo). Wait who? Yes Drew (booo) from Team Topper. I have heard he is meh at QB but killing it on defense. This game should be awesome as each team is evenly matched. MA has a better QB but CS has a better defense. This game could go either way.  

2.  We could be looking at a preview of the D5 title game this week when Come From Behind and The Bambs have at it. TB were awesome last week but they did dismantle a very bad team In Vandalay Industries. CFB beat a very bad UFO team. Its definitely test time as the winner of this one easily could get the #1 seed in this division. Each squad is as balanced as they come.  

3. Morning Wood was hopping mad at this writer last week as we had them at 50-1 to take D3. Last week was an easy test but this week the real test comes. MW must face Bullett Club. If MW wants to know what they are made of this is the week they will find out.  

4. Now that teams keep heading to D5 could this finally be the time once again for Celino Sewer Rats in D6? They looked very solid in a big week #1 win VS Hometech. This week they have a very winnable game vs Tight End Zones. D6 looks to be up for grabs as like 3 different teams could lay claim to the title. 

5.  I am dying to know who is playing QB for #XTC. If ever there was a team in dire need of a gunslinger it's these guys. The Rolando Ceasar Enrique Michael Murray experiment failed now its time for Plan B.  

6. I will have a keen eye on 3rd and Schlong this week to make sure week #1 was not a fluke.They looked very solid last week against a tough URTT. This week they get a battle tested BSS. If 3rd and Schlong is to take the next step they must win this game this week. You have to beat the teams you are supposed to. 

7. I love rivalry week and is there no bigger rivalry than Team Topper against the Icon Darryl Carr QB Super Star. This game should be awesome. Both squads are loaded on each side of the ball. One has a fantastic QB the other has Topper. I am very curious to see how Drew (booo) does this week as I am beginning to think he might be your D3 MVP.  Kudos to Team Topper for seeing we have no "official" performance enhancing drug policy in this league so they decided to take full advantage of this "loop hole. " 

8.  If Indecent Exposure wants to know if they are contender or pretender this session in D4 they will know by days end as they have two stiff tests in both Shredder's and Buffalo Solar Solutions. Both squads have seasoned vets and each will be a tough test. IE will not have an easy week this Saturday but they will know what they are made of by days end. 

9.  For those of you counting at home, this will be week #2 of B's Brother return and to date he still has no job. He assured us he would be in the program and have a job in 2-3 weeks of his podcast. If B's Brother does not have a job in hand by May 18th we will once again suspend him with no chance at appeal. C'mon B's Brother lets go clock is ticking. 

10.  If I had to pick winners in Breakfast Club. I would say Val's Pals 31 Taminators 23. Chef Curry and the shots 34 Peanut Butter Kelley Time 27. Angry Tailors 21 Poppin Molly's 13.

 

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CYA Saturday......

 

GF OUT

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