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- Written by Patrick McGovern
- Category: The Sentinel
- Published: 27 August 2019
- Created: 27 August 2019
- Hits: 16235
Welcome back TSL World! I must say opening weekend was a success complete with glorious weather, limited controversy and being reunited with our football friends we may or may not have seen all summer. Mind you there were some notable absences among the league resulting in 10 teams playing in double headers. Notably, A&A, Heather from PE, the females of Hofbrauhaus (Team Topper), pretty much all of D4, and Hung Buffalo. Nevertheless the teams in attendance came out to play, certain teams looking to already be in midseason form. Maybe the quick turnaround from the Spring session was an advantage to some. Let’s see what went down.
The DILFs, we learned, are a new, old team...if that makes sense. Basically they are a mix of players we all know and love. Already earning the nickname of ‘Dad Bod Squad’, this familiar cast of characters boast probably the highest average age of their male players (no I didn’t do the math so if you know of a team with oldest players let me know). We won’t discuss the ages of their females because well, I know better. Anywho- they played Energy Buff who had a slow start last session but ended up making it to the semis. Ben Stack was not in attendance so Erik Arden led his team. It was a close game with several lead changes. Johnny Dio was slinging for the DILFs after a several session hiatus. EB also had a new QB who could launch it to his speedy receivers. Tensions ran high as they tend to do in close games, but the DILFs pulled ahead and took the W, 27-18.
Bullet Club had a rough start to their season with a 20-61 loss to Peachy Platoon. BC was short on players as their story has gone so many times in the past. They had no answer for the speed and agility pretty much everyone on PP has. I’m not sure who was questioning the decision to move these guys up to D2 but this game showcased why it was the right one. BC is in a bit of a rebuilding year after losing in the championship game last session. The loss of Paul Nieman and Travis was a huge hit for them to take. They went on to play another recent addition to D2, Slytherin that End Zone. With Ricky at the helm, BC was able to take an early lead but after 2 picks in the second half, SITE fought back to come within a score in the waning minutes. The game was almost in hand when Ricky picked off Newman in the end zone, but BC could not get a completion and were forced to punt. They held SITE until 6th down when Jess Cunningham caught a TD to put her team on top. With seconds left in the game Ricky was able to get the ball passed midfield but could not connect with Gordon wide open in the end zone for the win. SITE won their D2 debut 32-26. They also had a double header last week. Second opponent, welcome back Peachy. Both of these teams have speed but PP proved they have just a little bit more. SITE lacked female speed to rush Dean so he was able to scramble around for countless seconds while his teammates got open. Kimmy of SITE got hurt during the game so they were down to 2 females. Newman looked to be close to midseason form, still riding the high of last year’s championship, but PP was too much of an offensive threat and took their second win of the day 43-30. Looking at the teams in D2, there aren’t many with the speed to match Peachy and I will definitely have my eye on this team as the season progresses.
No team wants to forget last session as much as the Ultimate Warriors. They tried pretty much everyone at QB but could not find that magic. This year they brought in Scott Pinto. On the other end of the spectrum, the Jabronies had an easy ride last session in D6, albeit they had the unfortunate luck of having the worst day possible to have a bad game which cost them the semifinals game. They beefed up their roster by adding the Kleckers to the mix and moved up to D3. In what was arguable the Game of the Day, both teams were back and forth. Sam threw TD after TD for her team, giving Jabronies some extra work to do. Joe Miano rose to the occasion and was able to fight back from being down late in the game. Both teams had things to prove, UW proved last session was a fluke and they are legit, Jabronies proving they can move up 3 divisions and continue to compete. A 49-49 tie was the best way for this game to end as both teams deserved the win.
Hofbrauhaus Buffalo took on new team We Back and did not give them a warm welcome. Maybe it was a bit of a rivalry to Topper as We Back is run by former teammate Sal. After courageously moving up to D1 last session, Topper and Co are back down in D2 and looking much happier already. All of his females were out of town so he brought in Tammy and Nicole Keller to fill the spots. We Back QB Chris (who Rameer has since dubbed Stranger Things, although I was getting more of a Brian Bosworth vibe) did what most new QBs do which is to try to go deep every play. Unfortunately for them, Pete and Drew were in attendance for HB rendering that play obsolete. We Back also used all subs with Molly and Erica stepping in for them. Topper was able to take what they gave him on defense and won the game 58-8. Don’t count We Back out yet though, so long as they can adjust their game plan to what works rather than what’s more entertaining.
Another new team I was able to see was Mountain Dew Me. It’s hard not to see them as they are the team wearing bright yellow. They also seem like they are going to fit in with us just fine. There were copious amounts of laughing and joking around during the game, even though they ultimately ended up losing. Full Throttle took the 28-14 win but MDM showed promise. They were able to put together a solid defense. Bridget at rusher gave the FT QB a run for his money. On offense, their guys are small and quick which can be used to their advantage once they get some plays worked out and they aren’t afraid to use the females, even when they don’t have to. Veteran move for a new team.
Overcompensators took a victory over Cobblestone 36-20. Daryl had a rough game, throwing at least 3 picks. He had Steph in as sub but hardly used her. His nephew’s frustration was palpable throughout the entire game. OC continue to improve on offense and defense. Their QB showed off some scrambling capabilities and play calling skills. They have solid females, height and some speed. D5 is no walk in the park but I wouldn’t be surprised to see this team as a top contender in 8 weeks time.
BiPolar Express took on new comers Blitzkrieg and came away with a 36-33 win. BE have added some new females to their roster which may be the help they needed. Kat from AWDIQ as well as Emily from Gryffindor have joined their ranks. Kat brings some much needed speed and used it to make big plays and gain long yardage for them. Being new to a league and playing a gender team right off the bat is not an ideal situation as the game is different in these situations but Blitzkrieg handled it as best they could and should fit in well.
TMA and the Graves Bros went at it with GB coming out on top 35-6. TMA added Steph to their ranks adding to their solid female core. Rumors are they will have a new QB as well that those of you at the win tournament got a sneak peek. For last week, Ferger remained throwing and less drunk than I hoped he’d be. The Graves Bros appear to be remnants of the old Cellino Sewer Rats, including Baby Gronk. Gronk rushed Ferger resulting a several sacks. TMA’s defense could not get a stop when they needed it most, letting up a deep TD on 3rd and long after Prim went for the pick and missed. It was all downhill from there. They continue to lack the speed necessary to keep up with many of these teams and it showed in this game. Not to worry though, TMA was still present at the bar as per usual.
Public Enemy played a rare late game against Gryffindor in their D1 debut. Both teams were able to score on their first drives but PE went ahead after Joey threw a pick that they were able to convert into a TD. Gryffindor was not able to score following that and PE went up by 2 scores at the half. The game was well in hand by then and PE cruised into an easy victory 33-13. It was not the debut anyone had in mind for Gryffindor as they went on to lose to Tight Ends in Motion 35-0. Joey Batts and Jeremy Burr showed their ugly sides blaming the refs for their abysmal performance.
Other than that, the day was everything we could have hoped for. Yes, we were hoping Brian Ferger would have to be carried to his car again but that was not the case. Boccio still owes the league one sober day as per the Prize and Punishment Wheel last session. There are some new teams we have not yet met and plenty of new faces around to get to know. Overall opening weekend was a hit and I’m even more excited about the rest of the season now that it’s officially underway. Remember, I’ll be watching…
~ courtesy of...The Sentinel