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- Written by Jeff Krol
- Category: TSL QB Power Rankings
- Published: 10 October 2024
- Created: 10 October 2024
- Hits: 26
Welcome back to the TSL Quarterback Power Rankings!
What have we got for you this week? How about TWENTY FIVE quarterbacks ranked, and the return of the famous DIVISION ALL-STAR TEAMS! You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll get angry that we have no idea what we're talking about and post unkind things about us on social media. Let's get to it!
#1 Joey Batts - Wet Bandits / Cunning Stunts
Last Week: Beat Sticky Bandits 32-16, beat Scared Hitless 51-23 (Wet Bandits), beat The Herd 55-37 (Stunts)
Two undefeated (regular) seasons with the two highest scoring teams in the TSL. You can't really beat that for a resume on the Quarterback Power Rankings. And we'll give you a spoiler for next week too: Joey will finish #1 in our Final Rankings of the year also.
#2 Bobby McConnell - Eyes Downtown
Last Week: Beat Sticky Bandits 46-44, beat Can't Touch This 53-45
Eyes Downtown gave up 89 points defensively in a doubleheader Saturday, and won them both. That is not an easy thing to do. Bobby can't catch Joey for #1 in the Power Rankings this season... but he can still catch a win over him in the D1 Championship game.
#3 Mike Thomas - Sticky Bandits
Last Week: Lost to Eyes Downtown 46-44, lost to Wet Bandits 32-16
The Sticky Bandits lost to both of their biggest rivals on Saturday, which has them as currently the third best team in D1 going into the playoffs (and Frodo can still pass them next week). A lot of people thought they were the third best team last season too, but Sticky took home the championship. Can Thomas overcome having the tenth worst defense in the TSL to do it again this Fall?
#4 Garrett Beesing - Frodo Swaggins
Last Week: Beat Freeballers 46-21
Frodo has been just 6-20 since they made the jump to D1 a few seasons ago, but now for the first time they've locked up a non-losing record in the TSL's hardest division. With a win over Sticky Bandits on Saturday, Frodo can finish 5-3-1 and steal a first round bye from the defending champions. Garrett has been THAT good this season.
#5 Ryan Dougherty - Can't Touch This
Last Week: Beat Untouchaballs 42-6, lost to Eyes Downtown 53-45
Remember when Can't Touch This was inexplicably losing a whole bunch of games in a row and we couldn't figure out what was wrong? That feels like a lifetime ago. Ryan has turned this team into a true D1 squad, capable of beating any team in the League on their best day. Will they win D2 and move up? The Mavericks and the Malones stand in their way.
#6 Andy Strug - The Malones
Last Week: Beat Mavericks 47-21
The Malones are 3-5... but four of their five losses have come against D1 teams they definitely WON'T see in the playoffs. A win over Mavericks this past week should be enough to remind everyone that the division STILL has to run through the Malones.
#7 Jordan Lawson - Mavericks
Last Week: Lost to The Malones 47-21, lost to Freeballers 32-23
The Mavericks have lost three of their last four games after a dominant start to the season. Does this mean that something is wrong, or just an understandable lack of focus since they've already locked up a first round bye for the playoffs? It's tough to say, but if they care about going into the playoffs as the #1 seed, they'll have a lot harder matchup against Eyes Downtown this week than their rivals Can't Touch This will with Freeballers.
#8 Jeremy Olson - Freeballers
Last Week: Did Not Play
We haven't seen a lot of Hogan at the fields this season. And he wore a mask that one time too, so that could have been anyone.
#9 Frank Laudico - Wanderers
Last Week: Beat Toppers All-Stars 35-20
Did Frank pass Dylan Day in the Power Rankings because he beat a last place Toppers All Stars team by 15 points? Not really... but Dylan misses a lot of games, and say this about Frank: he is one of the most reliable QBs in the TSL. Has he ever missed a game in our League? In ANY league?
#10 Dylan Day - Scared Hitless
Last Week: Did Not Play
No Dylan this week against Wet Bandits. Not a bad game to miss...
#11 Dylan Jaloza - Bullet Club
Last Week: Did Not Play
Bullet Club wrapped up two weeks early this season. Dylan's only hope of rising in the final Power Rankings next week is someone else above him falling out.
#12 Brandon "B" Ford - Practice Squad
Last Week: Did Not Play
No games for the TSL's best playoff QB this week.
#13 David Eickhoff - Grey Hair Don't Care
Last Week: Did Not Play
No games for Grey Hair Don't Care this week... but next week Grey Hair gets to be the only TSL team to play TEN regular season games this session.
#14 Alex Buchlis - Let's Get Reccked
Last Week: Beat Buffalo Vice 39-18
Let's Get Reccked is showing the value of peaking at the right time, as they've won their last two games by a combined 43 points. Can they carry the momentum into the playoffs, or will Rick Recckio get too drunk to keep it together on game day?
#15 Damien Keller - Mix'n It Up
Last Week: Beat Jabronies 38-25
Mix'n It Up was a 6-1 favorite to win D3 by the Godfather in his preseason article, where he also ranked them the third most likely team to win D3. We would have them fourth if we're being honest, with Jabronies expected to finish ahead of them. But Mix'n It Up is just one way away from locking up the #1 seed this session, and proving a lot of people (including us) wrong about them.
#16 Joe Miano - Jabronies
Last Week: Lost to Mix'n It Up 38-25
What is Jabronies most impressive win of the season to date? Is it Practice Squad? Let's Get Reccked? Every time we're about to put these guys in the top tier of D3, they lose a game to a top team that we expect they'll win. No shame losing to Mix'n It Up, but we'd like to see ONE great win before the playoffs (and we won't: their last game of the season is the forfeit win over Straw Hats).
#17 Jeremy Burr - Untouchaballs
Last Week: Lost to Can't Touch This 42-6
Jeremy Burr is ranked 17th in our QB rankings. Do we really believe there are 16 quarterbacks who are better than Burr right now? Maybe not, but that's what a 1-7 record and 20.0 PPG will get you. There are only six teams in the League with fewer points per game than Untouchaballs right now.
#18 Kyle Conniff - PowerPuff Girls
Last Week: Did Not Play
We're pretty sure that was Cody throwing for PowerPuff Girls again this week.
#19 Mark Dalfonso - The Herd
Last Week: Lost to Cunning Stunts 55-37
The Herd have become a legitimate contender in D4 almost overnight with the addition of Mark and some of his veteran buddies. The Cunning Stunts are still the Cunning Stunts though.
#20 Buddy Lee - Passing While Intoxicated / Big Daddy Jason & the ILFers
Last Week: Did Not Play
We don't THINK Buddy played any games this weekend, since it looked like Mike Shimburski and John Langley were throwing for his teams.
#21 Derek Pew - Vaspian
Last Week: Did Not Play
No games for Vaspian this week.
#22 Andy Clark - Buffalo Vice
Last Week: Lost to PWI 24-19, lost to Let's Get Reccked 39-18
Buffalo Vice is 3-5... but two of their wins came by forfeit, which makes it tough to bet TOO hard on this team in the playoffs. D3 is the most even division and often gives us a surprise winner, so you never know...
#23 Matthew Kieta - GirthQuakes
Last Week: Beat Select 34-12
The GirthQuake experiment has been a success, and only Cobblestone and Vaspian stand in the way of a winning record (and a POSSIBLE #3 seed in D4, if the Herd falls apart on Saturday). Matt Kieta has surprised many with his excellent play at QB, although it probably helps having a Klussman, a McConnell and a Jaloza on the roster to impart wisdom.
#24 Brandt Dubey - Toppers All Stars & Todd
Last Week: Did Not Play
Dubey didn't play for Toppers All Stars & Todd this week (that was the legendary Patrick McGovern slinging it!) but he's "the starter" so this spot in the Power Rankings is his to lose. Dubey was once #2 in the Power Rankings, way back in Spring 2019 when we first started. That team might have been a little more talented than this one, to be fair.
#25 Paul LoVullo - Come From Behind
Last Week: Beat Stir the Sauce 44-14
Paul is, PROBABLY, still the QB1 of Come From Behind. We haven't seen him much this session (was he there on Saturday vs Stir the Sauce?) but he's still one of the greatest when he plays. Come From Behind is tied for the best record in D5 and this could finally be their session to win it all.
Division All-Stars
It's been a few seasons since we've done this, but your TSL Division All-Stars are back! Here's how it works:
- We selected an All-Star team of 10 players from each division. Teams had to have one designated QB, at least five other male players, and at least three female players. The tenth spot could be either male or female depending on the strength of each particular division.
- Every division must have at least one All-Star from EACH team in the division. After each team gets their minimum one representative, we'll fill out the rest of the roster however we want. We TRY to spread this out so please don't write us an email asking why your team didn't have five all-stars. (Yes, of COURSE D1 could have been the entire Wet Bandits roster, but that's not fun for other teams.)
- If a player plays in more than one division, they are only eligible for the highest division they play in, UNLESS it's for a different position (i.e. Jeremy Burr is eligible as both a receiver in D1 and a quarterback in D2, but Steph Czaja is only eligible in D2 because she's not a QB and that's the highest division she plays). This came up a LOT. If you're wondering why you didn't make the All-Star team in the lower division you play in, please remember, you were never eligible... Especially Cunning Stunts, who have the best roster in D4 and yet only ONE player who was eligible (spoiler: she made the D4 All-Star team) because all the rest of them play for other teams in higher divisions.
- This is not strictly a ranking of who the "best" player is on each team. We're just looking for the best combination of players to fill out a team, and we'll take into account ALL that player offers when making our choices.
- It is not an insult to not make this list! Lots of the TSL's BEST players didn't make it because of the criteria we've listed above. Please try to understand, we are not saying that you suck if you're not shown...
So that's how it works. It'll all be subjective of course so try not to get too excited when you don't see your name below. These are the best combination of All-Star teams WE could think of given the rules above. If you think you can do better, feel free to send the Godfather a better version.
Oh, and the names within each category (male players vs female players) are arranged alphabetically by last name (or they're supposed to be anyway), so don't read anything into the order, they're not ranked best to worst.
Here are your Division All-Star Teams:
Hate it? Disagree with everyone on the list? Go on the facebook and complain like everyone else!
That's it for the TSL Power Rankings this week! As we said above, we don't currently have our own email address anymore, so if you have any thoughts about QB rankings, or you want to make sure we know who's throwing for your team, please feel free to contact our good friend This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
What's YOUR ranking?
