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- Written by Jeff Krol
- Category: TSL QB Power Rankings
- Published: 16 October 2024
- Created: 16 October 2024
- Hits: 181
Welcome back to the FINAL TSL Quarterback Power Rankings of the season!
Yes, unlike our way more productive colleagues, the Godfather and (maybe?) the Sentinel, we don't write articles during the playoffs. We like to sit back and just watch the show, the fireworks, the bloodbath, whatever you want to call it, without having to analyze anything. So with this being our last article of the year, we've saved a lot for you. We have our final Top 25 Quarterbacks of the year and then our usual playoff division analysis where we look at each playoff race in detail to pick out any trends in the data we can find. Plus some other stuff.
This will be our longest article of the year with lots of time-consuming charts and graphs so we skipped the individual QB write-ups this week and just included the Power Rankings themselves. You don't need us to tell you how good or bad your team's QB is at this point, your record speaks for itself!
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Division by Division Review of the TSL
For our final analysis of the season, we're going to show you the following:
- The breakdown of best offenses, defenses and net point differentials per division. Last season for the first time ever, we had zero forfeits to adjust for, so a nice, clean data set. This session we had 14 forfeits! Yes, half of them came from Straw Hats, but there were still many others, which of course we backed out of the data set for our analytics. Then we tried to color each team's data by their official jersey colors, but half of this league apparently uses the same colors so it's not perfect (sorry Cunning Stunts for your sexist pink coloring!)
- A graph of average point differentials per game for each division with a similar "Favorites, Contenders, Pretenders" logic we've used in previous seasons (if you're winning games by an average of 6+ PPG, you're a Favorite in green; if you're losing by an average of 6+ PPG, you're a Pretender in red; all other teams are yellow in the middle; these are not OUR judgments on who falls into each category, it's strictly based on the math of your team's point differentials). For what it's worth, in the last seven seasons that we've been showing these graphs, we've had 26 eventual division champions classified as "Favorites", 22 as "Contenders", and exactly zero as "Pretenders". Contenders actually won 4 divisions last Spring, compared to only 2 Favorites!
- A quick twitter sized (or "X sized") recap of the division heading into playoffs, and then identifying which teams are "overrated" and "underrated" in each group. Note that these last two categories are based purely on what we see in the scores and stats, NOT our own personal feelings of players on each team (we might personally think Blitzkrieg are overrated, but if the underlying numbers say their team is underrated, that's where we'll include them below) so TRY not to be offended thinking the "website is being mean". We're just reading numbers off a website, man. Relax.
And away we go!
Division 1
The Headline: The Wet Bandits are heavy favorites, with a few flawed rivals trying to catch them on a bad day. Freeballers are also here.
Underrated: Frodo Swaggins is fourth in the D1 standings, but third in offense, third in defense, and third in point differential. If the Sticky Bandits hadn't just won the championship a few months ago, and you had to evaluate all these teams based on this season alone, wouldn't you say Frodo Swaggins is the clear choice as the third best team in the League right now? And yet almost no one is discussing them as a real contender. Frodo shoots themselves in the foot sometimes by losing games they need to win, going 1-3 against D1 this session and mostly padding their record in D2 crossover games. But other than their kryptonite Wet Bandits, none of their losses were games they didn't have a shot at winning.
Overrated: The Freeballers went 3-6 this season... but if we strip out D2 teams they won't face in the playoffs, their record would fall to 0-4 with an average point differential of -18.5 PPG. They've played really well in the last month against some upper level D2 teams, and having Hogan back makes them a much better team. But they fall into "overrated" category for likelihood of playoff success until they can pick up their first "real" D1 win.
Division 2
The Headline: Three competitive teams battle for glory while Scared Hitless and Grey Hair hope for some upsets. Is there a sixth team in this division?
Underrated: Before we go any further, let's just re-run the charts above, but using ONLY the D2 games against other D2 teams, and not the D1 crossover games:
THIS is the chart you need to look at to understand the D2 playoffs. Of course one would expect EVERY D2 team's record to improve when you throw out the D1 games (Grey Hair, strangely, got worse, as their record against D1 was somehow better than their record against D2) but the most interesting situation was the Malones. The Malones went 4-5 this season against all opponents... but that includes an 0-4 record against D1 teams and a 4-1 record against D2 teams. And their point differential was MUCH better against their own division rivals. We have our own suspicions why that might be (teams used to killing their opponents in D3 might not be the best at keeping their composure when they're playing from behind against a top D1 team) but regardless of the reason, they played GREAT against their own division. Of course the Mavericks could beat them in the playoffs. Of course Can't Touch This could beat them. But shouldn't Malones be considered THE favorites right now, with the best in-division record and stats? This is the most underrated team in D2 right now.
Overrated: There are a couple ways to think about which team is the most "overrated". The Untouchaballs are losing by about 20 points per game right now and their only win this season came by a single point against a team that was ALSO 1-4 against its division. But that doesn't make them overrated statistically (they're in last place, and the stats say... that they should be in last place), it might just make them a bit overrated reputationally, since people still regard them (and rightfully so) as former D2 champions. So Untouchaballs might be getting a BIT more respect than they've earned THIS season, which makes them overrated in that sense. But the obvious choice based on the numbers is the Mavericks. Has a #1 seed ever been just +6 total points on the entire season? Sure, the crossover games skew a lot of D2 numbers, but Can't Touch This is +37 (not counting a forfeit) and The Malones are +33. Throw out the D1 games entirely, and Mavericks are a solid +6.6 PPG, which is good... but not particularly great for a #1 seed.
Division 3
The Headline: TSL's best division has five, MAYBE six contenders, and no one knows who will win.
Underrated: Practice Squad is the fourth best team in their division, but they have the best point differential. Easy choice for "most underrated team" here. Their three regular season losses were by 6 points, 2 points and 1 point, and their QB pretty FAMOUSLY brings his best game to the playoffs. We still think Wanderers are the team to beat in D3, but we wouldn't bet against Practice Squad... especially since they were the ones who ended the Wanderers season just a few months ago.
Overrated: We at the QB Rankings are big fans of Buffalo Vice, who have been a great team for a long time in this league. But this season, they clearly take the title of "most overrated team" in D3. It's not their fault exactly, but two of their three wins came via forfeit against Toppers All Stars & Todd (we blame Todd) and Straw Hats (who you'll notice we didn't even show in the standings above). So they're 1-6 in actual games played, and that one win was against Bullet Club without their starting QB. No "signature wins" on the season yet doesn't give us a lot of confidence that they'll beat Toppers All-Stars and then the Wanderers back-to-back on Saturday.
Division 4
The Headline: It's Cunning Stunts championship to lose, but Big Daddy Jason & the ILFers and GirthQuakes have a real chance.
Underrated: GirthQuakes started the season slow, with four straight losses to Select, The Herd, Creekers and Cunning Stunts (sure, there's a forfeit win over Cobblestone in there too). Since then they are 4-0 and they've won by 6, by 22, by 40 and then by 50. If you believe in momentum mattering for playoffs, this is the team that has it. Now you could argue that they've padded their stats a bit with two huge wins on the last day of the season, and that is true. But they also came within three points of beating the Stunts (who no other team has come within 18 points of beating) and they DID beat the #2 seeded Big Daddy Jason & the ILFers. Their record may show that they're only 5-4, but this is a much better team than that.
Overrated: It would be simple enough to point out that The Herd is a #3 seeded team despite having a negative point differential, and that alone would make them a decent candidate for Most Overrated Team in D4. But let's compare them to GirthQuakes, the other 5-4 in their division that they're ahead of based on an early season head-to-head win. They have very similar offenses (37 PPG for the Herd, 36.6 PPG for GirthQuakes) but look at their defenses: GirthQuakes are allowing 24 PPG defensively, and the Herd is allowing a whopping 38.2 PPG, fourth worst in the entire TSL! It's a massive credit to Mark and the offense that they've been able to win more games than they've lost this season giving up THAT many points. In fact among the 11 teams with the worst defenses in the League, the Herd is the ONLY team with a winning record (the rest being a combined 24-66). It's impressive that they can keep up with most teams on the strength of their offense... but isn't there a VERY talented opponent in D4 that's going to score gender touchdowns on just about every drive?
Division 5
The Headline: Come From Behind and PowerPuff Girls should meet in the Finals, right? Right???
Underrated: Spinelli's are the last place team in D5 going into the playoffs... but they don't look like a last place team to us. Sure, their defense sucks (last in their division, 11th worst in the TSL) but their offense is third BEST in their division, and their point differential says they should be about a fifth place team. Not great, but also not a last place pushover. PowerPuff Girls will be the favorite in their first round matchup, but not by that much, right? Spinelli's lost by 12 the first time these teams played way back in Week One... and then by only two points in the rematch a few weeks ago. If you're looking for a #8 seed to bet your paycheck on in the first round: this is the one.
Overrated: Two Tuddies had a great season finishing in third place with a 6-3 record. Considering they were 0-7-1 last season, this is a massive improvement. (Do we still do a Most Improved Team Award at the banquet?) That said, they finish the season only at +1.1 PPG point differential which is fairly average; they ended the season on a 2-3 stretch after starting 4-0; and most importantly, there are question marks around the health of their QB1. We're not sure if Mike Wolcott is healthy yet, but they've been using a lot of sublist QBs since he got hurt... and that's not going to happen in the playoffs. The Tuddies play great defense, but to beat PowerPuff Girls and Come From Behind they'll need some offense too. Do they have a healthy enough QB to keep up?
Division 6
The Headline: Blitzkrieg and Sausage McMuffins should meet in the Finals, right? Right???
Underrated: Blitzkrieg and Sausage McMuffins have the best offenses in D6 by FAR. They have the best defenses in D6 by FAR. They have the best point differentials in D6 by... you guessed it... FAR. So those two teams are properly rated as "very good" and won't be appearing on either of these lists. In fact MOST of D6 ended up in exactly the order you'd expect given their point differentials, so teams are generally fairly rated in this division. The most underrated team then... has got to be Day by Day. The former "Just Joshing" team is in fourth place, but they're the ONLY team outside of Blitzkrieg and Sausage McMuffins to finish with a positive point differential. They're also the only team to actually BEAT one of the "Big Two", with a win over Blitzkrieg about a month ago. No one is talking them to win the division, and that's fair. Blitzkrieg and Sausage McMuffins are the favorites, and they deserve to be. But if anyone is capable of playing spoiler in this division, it's Day by Day.
Overrated: Sticky Laces had the sixth best offense in their division, and the fifth best defense. Somehow, the combination of those below average ranks made them... the fourth best point differential? And the third best record in the standings? How?? This is another team (like Two Tuddies in D5) who struggled last session and were able to turn things around this Fall, and it's awesome to see. But the numbers (especially that negative point differential) suggest that they overachieved a little bit this season, and they should regress a bit in the playoffs. We think they might win their first round game... but if the semis and finals go through Blitzkrieg and Sausage McMuffins, well, Sticky Laces lost those regular season games by 20 and 35, so October 26th could be a bit of a struggle for them!
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Top Ten Best and Worst Lists for the 2024 Fall Season
The division analysis above is the real meat and potatoes of this article, but in case you're curious how you stack up against teams in OTHER divisions, here are the top ten (and bottom ten) teams in the entire TSL for offensive points per game, defensive points per game, and average point differential per game:
What did we learn from this?? The magic numbers for us are always 20 and 40. Nearly every team in this League averages between 20-40 PPG both offensively and defensively. If you're higher than 40 offensively or lower than 20 defensively, you're doing an amazing job. If you're lower than 20 offensively or higher than 40 defensively... you're probably not winning too many games. This season we had two teams crack the 40 point mark, including one over 50 points... and both were QBed by a man named Joseph Battaglia. Congrats to Cunning Stunts, our Fall 2024 scoring champs (their fourth scoring title since we started tracking this... no other team has even two).
So if Cunning Stunts were the BEST offense, who were the worst? This season, just like last, we had six teams fail to make it to 20 PPG on offense. Those teams (Dogg Pound, TMA, Pit Harade, Toppers All-Stars & Todd, Untouchaballs and Cobblestone) unsurprisingly went a combined 10-44 this season.
Then if we look at defenses, there were three teams (Sausage McMuffins, Blitzkrieg, Come From Behind) that held opponents to under 20 PPG this session. There were zero teams that allowed 40+ points per game, but Untouchaballs were one 2-Pt Conversion away from hitting that mark!
Besides the "40/20 Clubs", what else do we see from the best and worst units in the League? Blitzkrieg and Come From Behind were the only two teams in the League to make all three "Ten Best" lists for offense, defense and point differentials. There were four teams to make all three "Ten Worst" lists, including Creekers, the Untouchaballs, Cobblestone (STILL playing short-handed most weeks) and Toppers All-Stars & Todd (stats don't even reflect their two forfeit losses!)
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All-Time Championship Statistics
A couple years ago we compiled a list of every TSL champion in League history and devised a ranking system to see who the "best teams of all time" were. This was exhausting to research and put together, but it's now very simple to update once a session, so that's what we've done here. The timing feels right to update you all on this now JUST before playoffs so we can remind you what you're chasing here... co-ed football immortality. Here are the current immortals:
THAT part is objective - the champs are the champs, and we'd like to think history will remember their achievements for 1,000 years to come (history classes will likely debate what exactly the "Tommy Hughes Experience" was). This next part though is subjective: we then attempted to compare the relative strength of each division's championships to come up with a ranking system (a D2 title is harder to win than a D4 title) and this is what we landed on:
- A D1 championship is our baseline since it's the best a team can do. Let's make that worth 100 points.
- A D2 title is worth, at BEST, 49% of that, since two D2 titles don't quite equal a D1 title (you can argue it should be LESS than 49%, but we've made the choice to weight lower divisions as heavily as reasonably possible here). 49 points for a D2 title.
- A D3 title should be worth 49% of THAT, so about 24 points for each D3 championship.
- Every subsequent division is worth 49% of the previous one, so D4 is worth 11 points, D5 is worth 5 points, and D6 is worth 2 points.
- Indoor championships aren't currently worth a point (though we may revise this in the future). With apologies to DILFS, Jelly Beans, Sticky Bandits, Eyes Downtown and Friendship Club, Winter sessions are often used to make new teams and play with new people. No team should be penalized in the rankings for doing that instead of entering their usual squad. We'll give them credit for "number of titles", which they've earned, but zero points awarded. Indoor championships are abbreviated as "W:A" (Winter: A) and "W:B" on the chart below, to make it a little easier to read.
It's an arbitrary system of course, but it's the one we chose. So here is the updated list of your "greatest champions of all time" going into the Fall 2024 playoffs (active teams are highlighted below; split into two segments side-by-side to make font size more easily readable):
We always debate making a change to the math above so that subsequent championships in the same division would be worth less the second time around. After all, was it fair that Puckett kept improving their standings by winning D4 over and over? Shouldn't they have moved up before this session? But for now we decided to leave it as is.
So where does that leave us today? Wet Bandits (Legends) have tied Green & Associates by winning their third D1 championship, and two more would tie Public Enemy as the greatest team in TSL history. Eyes Downtown could jump from 5th to 2nd with another win, and Sticky Bandits from 9th to 4th.
The Sticky Bandits are tied with Public Enemy and Puckett All-Stars for the most total TSL Championships of all-time with five. If they win again this season, they'll stand alone as the only six time champions in TSL history.
Bottom line, people remember champions, not the teams who come in second place, so immortality can only be found by winning it all. Good luck!
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That's it for the TSL Power Rankings this season! We can't possibly make any other charts for you at this point (this was exhausting) and we doubt anyone has read this start-to-finish anyway.
We don't currently have our own email address anymore, so if you have any thoughts on any of the above, please feel free to contact our good friend This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
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