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Final Picks

Category: Uncategorised
Created: Friday, 23 October 2020 18:03
Published: Friday, 23 October 2020 18:03
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 284

 

 

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe:

 

WELCOME TO CHAMPIONSHIP WEEKEND!

 

It took a long time to get here, but we know that. We know what we’ve overcome in the #TSL2020 season to get to this point. But it doesn’t matter anymore. What matters is that we made it, and on October 24th in the Year of Our Lord 2020, the TSL will crown 6 New Champions. 6 teams will earn their place in history alongside their claim to Social Co-Ed Football Immortality. This one is special. It was unlike any other championship that preceded it, and (hopefully) will be unlike any of the ones that follow.

 

On this Saturday, the remaining 26 of the TSL’s 44 teams will do battle. All of D1 is still around, so if Gryffindor or Why So Serious? has any hope of winning the D1 title, it’ll take 3 straight wins to do so. Good luck.

 

And just when I thought this league couldn’t surprise me anymore, it did. The fact that there was only ONE “upset” last week is the most insane thing I’ve ever heard of. I thought Topper was messing with me when he told me on Sunday. That’s right, other than The Untouchaballs’ 21-7 victory over Grey Hair Don’t Care, every single higher seed won this weekend (with the exception of the play-in games, somehow).

 

That’s incredibly boring, and you all know it. And in the TSL, it feels almost impossible! We usually have a shocker or two that gets the league talking! But NO, not this season. And most of the games weren’t even close. The few that were, were VERY exciting. For example:

 

Frodo Swaggins 39, Vaspian 38 – Scotty Dro let out an email to TSL brass last weekend, claiming how his team lets him down and he’s looking for a D1 team next year. . . Then he proceeds to not even show up for the playoffs. This resulted in Frodo having to have Garrett play QB, and they had to play 3 guys and 3 girls all game. That’s not ideal, unless you’re Vaspian. Vaspian, fresh off their win over En Fuego in the play-in round, stayed close all game before tying the game with little to no time left on the clock. They ALMOST won the game on the conversion, but failed. This brought us to OVERTIME. Vaspian struck first, scoring a gender TD but failing on the conversion. Frodo went to respond, and finally did, getting a huge gender TD to tie the game. But they were successful on their conversion, giving them a 1 point win.

 

Uncle Rico’s 37, Freeballers 31 – I’m starting to think that the Freeballers never “all had COVID” but instead proceeded to get some sort of PEDs to get them playing like an actual football team this week. After knocking out the Stunts, they took URTT to the limit. Uncle Rico’s was forced to score with no time left to take this game that you’d have guessed they’d win by 21. Rico’s moved on, but barely.

 

Slytherin That End Zone 24, Bullet Club 16 – A back and forth, defensive affair is the opposite of how these two teams play each other normally. After taking a quick 15-0 lead, SITE couldn’t do anything after that for most of the game. Bullet Club took a 1 point lead with apparently like 9-10 minutes left. After more back and forth, with SITE down to 5-1 not far from the endzone, Newman found Taylor Pagano for a gender TD with 29 seconds left to secure the win.

 

Graves Bros 29, The BiPolar Express 24 – Another typical close game between these two teams. Both were considered to be among the division’s best and even if this was a #1 vs #8 seed matchup, you wouldn’t have known it. BPX started coming together at the end of the season, but Graves Bros has been good all year and deserved this one.

 

 

But that’s it. FOUR close games. If there were more, its because nobody told me about it. What a boring league. Why do we even bother playing?

 

Oh, that’s right, because football is awesome.

 

So who’s going to win the TSL Championships this weekend? Well, Let me tell you:

 

D1:

 

Okay, I proceeded to give you all the “Round 1” games and breakdown last week, so if you want to read it, feel free to scroll down a lot to that article and remind yourself. And if you didn’t read it last week? FOR SHAME FOR NOT READING MY ARTICLE. All jokes aside, this is going to be an interesting wrinkle for some of these teams with championship aspirations. For the sake of having something to write, I’m going to use my predicted winners from last week for the matchups here. No offense to Gryffindor or Why So Serious?. Prove me wrong, it’s my favorite.

 

#1 Public Enemy (7-1) vs #5 Eyes Downtown (3-4)

Points For (Division Rank): PE – 33.38 (2nd), ED – 28.43 (5th)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): PE – 25.25 (1st), ED – 33.00 (4th)

Overall TSL Rank: PE 3rd, ED 28th

TSLQBPRC Line: Public Enemy (-6)

Past Game(s): Public Enemy 28, Eyes Downtown 18

 

It’s on. Right? Don’t let the rankings deceive you, Eyes Downtown is a better team than they’ve shown this year. There may have been zero total games they’ve had their full roster, but I believe this week they’ll be at full power. But, how good are they? There’s a lot of new faces over there, including some females that have never played in a TSL playoff game before, much less one that they have to deal with Heather and Cheryl in. I’m giving the edge to Public Enemy for their experience and having continuity this season. PUBLIC ENEMY BY 9

 

#2 Tight Ends In Motion (5-3) vs #3 Marketing Mayors (4-4)

Points For (Division Rank): TEIM – 38.50 (1st), MM – 30.29 (4th)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): TEIM – 26.75 (2nd), MM – 28.00 (3rd)

Overall TSL Rank: TEIM  14th, MM 21st

TSLQBPRC Line: Tight Ends In Motion (-3)

Past Game(s): Tight Ends In Motion 29, Marketing Mayors 28

 

So, what a ride for Tight Ends this season. After an awful start, they’re finding themselves with the hottest offense in the TSL. It’s always a shame to say this, but the injury to Alex has once again become the best thing for them. “Bro” Kleckler came in, along with Robin Makula, and the offense is at a level never before achieved by TEIM. The hottest story in the TSL the last few seasons has been “How good would TEIM be with a better QB?” and now we’re seeing it. As good as the Mayors are, TEIM is just better right now. TIGHT ENDS IN MOTION BY 7

 

The End Result: Public Enemy brings out the best in everyone, but especially Tight Ends. TEIM is going to want this game badly, for obvious reasons, but “at the end of the day” (say that in B’s Brother’s voice please), the champs retain. PE just has a slightly more talented roster, and the best QB of all time. That gives them the edge in what will be an EXCELLENT D1 final. PUBLIC ENEMY BY 2

 

D2:

Last Week’s Games:

Dilfs 37, HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO 16

Jabronies 26, Peachy Platoon 18

Sticky Bandits 43, Morning Wood 28

SITE 24, Bullet Club 16

 

#1 Dilfs (7-2) vs #4 Slytherin That End Zone (5-4)

Points For (Division Rank): Dilfs – 33.63 (3rd), SITE – 31.11 (4th)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): Dilfs – 26.00 (1st), SITE – 28.89 (3rd)

Overall TSL Rank: Dilfs 5th, SITE 18th

TSLQBPRC Line: Dilfs (-9)

Past Game(s): Dilfs 35, SITE 22

 

 

The Dilfs have pretty much dominated this division all season. Their only losses have been to Sticky in Week 1 with a lot of players missing and a midseason loss to Jabronies. That’s it. Meanwhile, SITE’s 5 wins are as follows: HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO, Morning Wood, a Week 1 win against Jabronies, and two late comeback wins against Bullet Club and Peachy Platoon. Not exactly world beating. The Dilfs are just a little bit better than SITE in everything, except for being younger. I don’t think that comes into play here. DILFS BY 12

 

#2 Jabronies (6-3) vs #3 Sticky Bandits (5-4)

Points For (Division Rank): Jabronies – 34.33 (2nd), Sticky – 34.44 (1st)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): Jabronies – 27.56 (2nd), Sticky – 33.22 (7th)

Overall TSL Rank: Jabronies 10th, Sticky Bandits 17th

TSLQBPRC Line: Sticky Bandits (-1)

Past Game(s): Sticky Bandits 39, Jabronies 28

 

I don’t know what it is about these two teams, but it seems like Sticky just always has the Jabronies’ number. It’s possibly because the Jabronies are made up of all of the players that weren’t good enough to crack the Sticky Roster. They play the same Krol-Baker offense, AND defense. Sticky has been doing this longer, and they tend to know what the Jabronies are going to do before they even do it. Logically, Jabronies should be able to score a lot more on Sticky, but they can’t. Until they start proving things otherwise, I’ll just go with what should happen, since that’s what this season seems to be about anyway. STICKY BANDITS BY 6

 

The End Result: Well, we’ve kind of just seen this game two weeks ago. Dilfs won 39-31. That’s not a “guaranteed” win for the Dilfs, but when it comes down to it, they’ve just been the best team in the division all season. Barring half the team needed to get a rapid COVID test in Syracuse or something this time (more on that one later), the repeat feels on. DILFS BY 7

 

D3:

 

Last Week’s Games:

Vaspian 42, En Fuego 25 (Play-In Game)

Frodo Swaggins 39, Vaspian 38 (OT)

The Untouchaballs 21, Grey Hair 7

 

#1 All We Do Is Quinn (8-1) vs #5 The Untouchaballs (3-5)

Points For (Division Rank): AWDIQ – 34.00 (1st), Untouchaballs – 27.13 (4th)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): AWDIQ – 22.43 (2nd), Untouchaballs – 27.00 (5th)

Overall TSL Rank: AWDIQ 7th, The Untouchaballs 29th

TSLQBPRC Line: All We Do Is Quinn (-14)

Past Game(s): All We Do Is Quinn 32, The Untouchaballs 28

 

14 points is too much in this contest. I get it, Quinn has been a wrecking ball all season (save for the one game without Vince), but they still only beat UT by 4 points in the regular season. Quinn might blow it in the playoffs every single year, but Untouchaballs have literally never been here before. I still don’t know who they are, but at some point I will. Maybe this is the time to make a name for themselves? Maybe not. ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 8

 

#2 Scared Hitless (5-2) vs #3 Frodo Swaggins (5-2)

Points For (Division Rank): SH – 30.83 (3rd), Frodo – 33.71 (2nd)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): SH – 20.17 (1st), Frodo – 26.43 (4th)

Overall TSL Rank: Hitless 12th, Frodo 13th

TSLQBPRC Line: Scared Hitless (-3)

Past Game(s): DNP THIS SEASON

 

Game of the day potential right here. These two teams are VERY CLOSE to each other, so we’ll have to break it down to advantages. At QB, Assuming Scotty shows up, Frodo has a distinct advantage over Hitless there. Dylan is doing a fine job as he learns, but Scotty is an All World co-ed QB. For females, Scared Hitless has the distinct advantage because Jaimie and Cat are better than anyone on Frodo. So it comes down the supporting cast of males. Nick and an aging Garrett are nice to have, but the cupboard is bare behind them. Meanwhile, Scared Hitless boasts some impressive talent, most notably Jonny Football, Tristan, Brandon Farr and Cat’s boyfriend. I’m sure there’s some other guy I don’t know in there too. This is another place I have to give the edge to Hitless. It’ll be a good one, but SCARED HITLESS BY 12.

 

The End Result: I just want to be able to say “Man, don’t you wish Quinn had room for Cat’s boyfriend?” and give Hitless the win here. The truth is, these teams are pretty even across the board, EXCEPT at QB. Vince is just better than Dylan, and AS LONG AS QUINN DOESN’T FALL BEHIND AND LOSE THEIR HEADS BECAUSE THEY’RE PREMATURELY ASSUMING THEY’RE BLOWING IT AGAIN, that should be enough to give them the victory they’ve tried so very, very hard for. ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 6

 

D4:

Last Week’s Games:

Freeballers 47, Cunning Stunts 9 (Play-in)

Uncle Rico’s 37, Freeballers 31

Over Compensators 46, Family Feud 15

 

 

#1 Buffalo Solar Solutions (6-2) vs #4 Over Compensators (3-5)

Points For (Division Rank): BSS – 35.25 (4th), OC – 34.63 (6th)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): BSS – 28.00 (1st), OC – 40.75 (5th)

Overall TSL Rank: BSS 8th, OC 31st

TSLQBPRC Line: Buffalo Solar Solutions (-12)

Past Game(s): Buffalo Solar Solutions 42, Over Compensators 20

 

While these two teams have very similar offenses, the numbers show that one thing is very clear: the BSS defense will dictate how this game goes. If they play to their normal standards, BSS should walk away with the victory. However, a little birdie told me that there’s a chance that Defensive standout and potential D4 MVP Brett Cole won’t be playing this weekend. Whatever selfish reason he has to not be there (The ONLY allowed explanation is “he’s adopting a puppy”), BSS will need to overcome it. But on the OC side of things, they were talking to Topper about potentially moving around the schedule so they can have some more players make it. Considering that didn’t happen (I think?), The OC might be shorthanded as well. I’m not entirely sure they can afford to be missing players for this game, and that could allow Andy Clark to just carve up the OC defense. BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS BY 10

 

#2 The Angels (6-2) vs #3 Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers (5-3)

Points For (Division Rank): Angels – 40.13 (2nd), URTT – 42.00 (1st)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): Angels – 33.75 (2nd), URTT – 38.50 (4th)

Overall TSL Rank: Angels 9th, URTT 16th

TSLQBPRC Line: Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers (-8)

Past Game(s): Uncle Rico’s 35, The Angels 32

 

Well, first off, bet the over here. These two teams can score, and score they will. Uncle Rico’s has been one of the better teams in the league in the second half, and they had their “scare” last weekend against the Freeballers that should keep them focused in this game. I’m not entirely sure that The Angels have a way to stop Chris Nelson, and that may be their downfall. These aren’t your Matty’s Angels here, they’re missing some key players due to injuries/being a world famous video game streamer maybe so it’s a different vibe. They don’t have the confidence they normally do. And on top of that, a good chunk of the roster have 1-3 games to potentially play before this one. It all adds up to a shocking D4 final without a gender team. UNCLE RICOS BY 12

 

The End Result: Buffalo Solar Solutions and Uncle Rico’s are going to put on a nice show for everyone. It’s the top ranked offense against the top ranked defense. But if the rumors are true on the loss of Brett for BSS, that top ranked Defense goes down a notch. Jon Senn finally gets that title. UNCLE RICOS BY 3

 

D5:

Last Week’s Games:

Practice Squad 40, Intentional Pounding 0

Mountain Dew Me 35, TOX 13

Zack Attack 26, Pteratacos 12

Cobblestone 31, ILF 20

 

#1 Practice Squad (7-1) vs #4 Zack Attack (4-5)

Points For (Division Rank): PS – 35.50 (2nd), ZA – 25.00 (4th)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): PS – 13.63 (2nd), ZA – 22.22 (4th)

Overall TSL Rank: Practice Squad 1st, Zack Attack 23rd

TSLQBPRC Line: Practice Squad (-20)

Past Game(s): Practice Squad 38, Zack Attack 15

 

 

There just isn’t much to say here. Practice Squad is a level above Zack Attack. But don’t let that skew your view on the Attack. They’ve played VERY well this season, and they’ve just fallen victim to having two titans in their division. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 18

 

#2 Mountain Dew Me (7-1) vs #3 Cobblestone (6-2-1)

Points For (Division Rank): MDM – 38.35 (1st), Cobblestone – 22.56 (6th)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): MDM – 6.25 (1st), Cobblestone – 20.78 (3rd)

Overall TSL Rank: MDM 2nd, Cobblestone 6th

TSLQBPRC Line: Mountain Dew Me (-26)

Past Game(s): Mountain Dew Me 32, Cobblestone 6

 

I want nothing more than for Darryl Carr QB Superstar to walk onto the fields (five minutes late mostly likely) on Saturday, and slay the beast that is MDM. We all do. But it’s just not going to happen. Like Zack Attack, Cobblestone got stuck with two powerhouses in a season that they could’ve won a championship for sure. MOUNTAIN DEW ME BY 30

 

The End Result: It felt weird the entire time typing that PS was #1 and MDM was #2. I think the entire TSL knows that’s not true. I don’t say these things to take away from Practice Squad, but even with them on a higher level, Mountain Dew Me is even higher. It became apparent weeks ago that MDM was taking that title, and even I’m not a bad enough gambler to bet against them. MOUNTAIN DEW ME BY 11

 

D6:

Last Week’s Games:

The Bambs 38, PC Plumbing 16

TMA 26, Blitzkrieg 15

Graves Bros 29, The BiPolar Express 24

Tater Tots 39, Lenny’s Ladies 16

 

#1 Graves Bros (7-1) vs #4 TMA (4-4-1)

Points For (Division Rank):  GB – 33.38 (2nd), TMA – 23.00 (8th)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): GB – 28.38 (4th), TMA – 20.00 (1st)

Overall TSL Rank: GB 4th, TMA 19th

TSLQBPRC Line: Graves Bros (-2)

Past Game(s): Graves Bros 20, TMA 14

 

Maybe I just don’t give Graves Bros enough respect. Week after week, I expect them to be upset, but all they tend to do is constantly win again and again. No, they don’t kill teams, but they’re always solid and they win each week. TMA has been a much different team in the second half of the season than they were to start the year. Their defense is still elite. They can play zone or man without issue, and the pressure they get up front from their rusher forces teams into mistakes. They’ll do the same to Graves Bros. The issue will be the offense. If QB Ryan has a good day, TMA can take the title that they’re so overdue on. Honestly, if TMA can score over 20 points in a game, they’ll win. But I think it’s time to give some credit where it’s finally due. GRAVES BROS BY 6

 

#2 Tater Tots (5-3-1) vs #3 The Bambs (5-3)

Points For (Division Rank): Tots – 25.78 (6th), Bambs – 34.00 (1st)

Points Allowed (Division Rank): Tots – 22.56 (2nd), Bambs – 28.38 (3rd)

Overall TSL Rank: Tater Tots 11th, The Bambs 15th

TSLQBPRC Line: The Bambs (-2)

Past Game(s): Tater Tots 29, The Bambs 26

 

Another game with huge Game of the Day potential here. The Bambs’ offense has been magical this season, which is exactly what they’ll need to beat the Tots. The Tots have also been hot the second half of the season, but the teams they’ve been playing (2 games against TMA, 2 against Lenny’s Ladies) haven’t had the best of offenses to prepare for. The Tots are fun team, and they’re getting better by the minute, but I don’t think they have what it takes to keep up with The Bambs this time, and I’m well aware they already beat them once. THE BAMBS BY 4

 

The End Result: In what can be considered a topsy turvy D6 season where literally all of the potential finals matchups are very fun, we get Graves and The Bambs. This is going to be a higher scoring affair for sure, and I think its going to come down to the wire. Seriously, these teams are as even as you can get. The Bambs average 34 points a game, and Graves scores 33.38. Both teams allow an identical 28.38 points. It’s as much of a coin flip as it can be. So, I flipped one. THE BAMBS BY 1

 

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

1.      I ask this every week, but how will the weather play a factor? I see that it’s 75 degrees in Buffalo today, which is PERFECT weather for our championship games. But some overnight storms will make the fields soft, and you’ll be playing in 45 degrees tomorrow. These conditions mean that just about anything will happen. Sunscreen looks to be optional as opposed to mandatory.

 

2.      Can anyone in D1 win 3 games to take the championship? The short answer is yes. I don’t think I’d be surprised if I find out from Topper Saturday Night/Sunday that Eyes Downtown or Marketing Mayors won the title.

 

 

3.      Can All We Do Is Quinn slay the demons of their past and finally take the championship or were you just being nice? I think it lines up nicely for them, but I really, really think Scared Hitless can beat Quinn.

 

4.      Who’s the most slam dunk champion this season? It has to be Mountain Dew Me. They averaged only 6.25 points against! That’s insanity. I love Practice Squad, especially with B, but I can’t envision this going any way but MDM’s. If I had to rank my champions from above in order of confidence from most to least: Mountain Dew Me, Dilfs, Public Enemy, Uncle Rico’s, All We Do Is Quinn, The Bambs.

 

 

5.      If all of the teams in this session come back next year, and you were put in charge of who plays in what divisions for the Spring, what would the league look like? Okay, so we had 44 teams this session, which would be 4 divisions of 7, and 2 with 8. I’d want to make D6 only 6 teams, so we can have 3 divisions of 8, 2 of 7, and 1 of 6:

 

D1: Public Enemy, Eyes Downtown, Marketing Mayors, Why So Serious, Gryffindor, Tight Ends In Motion, Dilfs (7 Teams)

D2: Sticky Bandits, Slytherin that End Zone, Jabronies, Peachy Platoon, Bullet Club, HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO, Morning Wood, All We Do Is Quinn (8 teams)

D3: Frodo Swaggins, Scared Hitless, Buffalo Solar Solutions, Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers, The Angels, The Untouchaballs, Grey Hair Don’t Care, Cunning Stunts (8 teams)

D4: Over Compensators, Practice Squad, Mountain Dew Me, Cobblestone, Freeballers, En Fuego, Vaspian (7 teams)

D5: Family Feud, Pteratacos, Graves Bros, Tater Tots, Zack Attack, The Bambs, TMA, ILF (8 teams)

D6: Blitzkrieg, Lenny’s Ladies, The Bi-Polar Express, Intentional Pounding, TOX, PC Plumbing (6 Teams)

 

These would be some pretty fun divisions. To be honest though, I’d love to get 4 more teams and have 6 divisions of 8 more than anything. Chances are we’ll have some divisions of 10 in the spring when people start coming back. But this is just using the teams that we have now.

 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS BEFORE SATURDAY:

 

1.      Absolute shout out to Travis, Dark Val, and Diana. I don’t know if you know this story yet, but I found it amazing. Apparently, last Friday they found out they *could* have been exposed to COVID, which meant no playoffs for them. Instead of accepting their fate, they found a rapid test center 2 ½ hours away, made appointments as soon as they opened at midnight, and drove the 5 hours round trip to get tested (and they were all negative!) and make it back in time for the games. That’s some dedication to the TSL!

 

2.      Well, I gave who I *think* will win, but here’s who I’d want to win this Saturday:

 

a.      D1: Why So Serious? (I mean, that would be amazing)

b.      D2: Jabronies

c.       D3: All We Do Is Quinn

d.      D4: Buffalo Solar Solutions

e.      D5: Cobblestone

f.        D6: Tater Tots

 

3.      Every champion from our last session is still alive. Public Enemy is still going in D1, The Dilfs are doing well in D2, Sticky acclimated to D2 just fine as D3 champs, The Angels are still around in D4, The OC is alive in D4 as well, and Zack Attack is alive in D5 as the D6 champs. It’s good to see that those who moved up are performing well. It’s not the end of the world to go up a division.

 

4.      There are currently 7 of the 8 slots for the TSL indoor league already taken. GET YOURS TODAY.

 

5.      If you’re at the fields this weekend, once again, buy Topper a drink. He deserves it for all of his hard work. Even if you’re out of the playoffs, stop by anyway!

 

6.      I look forward to Breakfast Club happening again in the Spring, we hope. In case you forgot, we were looking at record numbers and 8-10 teams as opposed to our usual 6. The secret is out.

 

7.      It doesn’t matter if it’s the last week of the season, the COVID protocols will remain in effect for the entire day. Don’t be that guy or girl.

 

8.      Congrats to everyone for (mostly) respecting the bar and not causing any problems! Good stuff right there.

 

9.      Assuming we can get back to normal next season, be prepared for the return of the usual TSL craziness you’re used to. Clowns, Podcasts, Dunk Tanks, drinking games, maybe an ice cream truck again, who knows?

 

10.   Finally, again, if you’re REALLY SURE someone on your squad should be nominated for an award or two, email the official Awards Nomination Collector Emily Curry at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. and if she’s too intimidating for you, you can email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .

 

 

Good luck to all of our teams this week. Immortality is waiting for you.

 

Go get it.

 

-GF

Welcome to Topper Sports

Category: Uncategorised
Created: Friday, 04 March 2016 16:44
Published: Friday, 04 March 2016 16:44
Written by Super User
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Update 10/28/20 

The Sentinel is out with their final review of championship weekend..  

  • Thank you again for a great fall 2020 season.  Somehow we managed to get in most of the games, and Saturdays felt a bit more normal. So thank you for being part of it.
  • Indoor Football starts in January, 2021 as Sportsplex, we have reached our sellout point at 8 teams, however we can expand that up to 10 teams.  $200 deposit holds your spot..
  • Congratulations to our Division Champions (listed below) The Big guys in the skies would be happy with how things worked out this season.
  • A special thank you to Coach Jay Jaskier, Emily Curry, Joe K, Jeff Krol,  Val Bernal, Travis and Emily Schilling for stepping up and helping with game day management, ref schedules, rosters, pictures, Godfather discussions, the season would not have gone on without their commitment to the league.

 

10/24 Results 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

For the latest news on Topper Sports including any game cancellations, Sign up for Topper Sports Instant Messaging

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Updated Guidelines

§  The TSL and The Angry Buffalo will have Covid-19 guidelines in place and posted at the fields, all players MUST have a mask, and follow the posted instructions on when they must wear their mask. There won’t be any tolerance for players and patrons who don’t follow the posted guidelines. 

§  We have put together a group of volunteers to help manage the game day experience

  • Volunteers: Joe K, Valerie Bernal, Travis Clevenger, Jay Jaskier, Emily Curry and Jeff Krol
  • I have asked them to help make sure players are checking in, entering the fields and exiting the fields in the designated areas
  • They will be wearing orange shirts in honor of Rameer
  • They will be enforcing our guidelines.
  • Please make sure your players/teammates have masks or they will not be able to play.  Games will not be held up because players aren’t signing in on time
  • Please do not be disrespectful to them, any rude behavior will not be tolerated.

§  Prior to entering the fields, all players must sign into our Covid Tracing App.  There will be signs posted with a QR code that will take you to this form https://toppersports.com/covid/ where you and your teammates will have to sign in, and answer the questions.  It’s quick, and it’s necessary!!

§  Teams may start to enter the fields 10 minutes prior to their game time, so please make sure you have checked in on the app.

§  Teams will not be permitted to be on the sidelines, rather please setup behind the endzones.  Because of potential subbing issues, we have added a 4th time out for each team to use this season.

§  Please practice social distancing: do not warn up where other teams have congregated, please wait for the teams playing prior to your game to leave the field before entering the field.

§  Masks must be worn when entering the fields.  There will be a designated field entrance area, and a designated field exit area.  Please use the entrance and exit areas as intended.  The field entrance will be located near my truck(for those of you who have played before) for those new to the league, look for the Silver ford explorer.

§  The Rosegarden has setup a lot of outdoor seating for us, please be patient with their staff, and understand that food must be ordered when purchasing alcohol.  Please follow the current restaurant covid policy’s, face mask must be worn until you are seated.  Do not table jump, meaning if you have friends at a table nearby, do not walk over to them without a mask. 

§  Unfortunately, we cannot have spectators at our fields.  Those of you who play on more than 1 team, we suggest that you bring a lawn chair and tailgate so to speak, or go up to the bar and grab a table.

§  There is expanded parking behind the bar, so please park up against the tree lines, and make sure to leave room for cars to get out. (see attached layout)

§  Dogs are permitted, must be accompanied by an adult and on a leash at all times, and obviously, not permitted in the bar area or the fields.

§  While playing you do not have to wear a mask, however we do encourage that gaiter scarfs be worn if at all possible.

§  I encourage all players download the telegram messaging app and join our channel, this is the fastest way for us to update everyone on league news and events

§  These guidelines are subject to change

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Please note, Payment will be due in Full upon registration

  • Team Fee: $450
  • Forfeit Fee: $40
  • Total Amount due: $490
  • (note- if you did not forfeit a game in the previous season, the $40 forfeit fee will be reimbursed at the end of the season, or carried over to your next season registration)

 

Payments can be made 2 ways:

  1. Via Paypal to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
  2. Via Venmo Patrick-McGovern-8

 

 

please make sure All Players must sign a new waiver for 2020 https://waiver.fr/rg-qkrcj

 

 

   

For the latest news on Topper Sports including any game cancellations, Sign up for Topper Sports Instant Messaging

 https://telegram.me/toppersports

 

Contact Information:
Topper Sports, LLC  
Phone /Cell 716.861.1012
Email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
Web www.toppersports.com

 

Terms, Conditions and FAQs

  

  1. All players must be 21 years of age and over to play.
  2. All Players Must Have a new signed waiver on file for the calendar year, please fill it out here https://waiver.fr/p-3oVY2
  3. Rules & Schedules can be found under Downloads section on the website http://www.toppersports.com/index.php/downloads
  4. Check the football page for divisions/standings and upcoming games/results.  
  5. For those of you new to the league, be sure to check out the Godfathers page.  There you will find insights into this weeks games and predictions as well.  Very good reading entertainment can be found here!
  6. Substitutions -please send an email to the sublist master by the Thursday before your game regarding using subs. (This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.)
  7. You and your teammates are encouraged to sign up for our telegram channel, https://t.me/toppersports it’s the first place we’ll announce if there are any cancellations and other league news.
  8. The best way to get a hold of Topper is through telegram:  https://t.me/PatrickMcG  this is preferred over normal text messaging. 
  9. Team Fees Please note, Payment will be due in Full upon registration
  • Team Fee: $450
  • Forfeit Fee: $40
  • Total Amount due: $490
  • (note- if you do not forfeit a game during the season, the $40 forfeit fee will be reimbursed at the end of the season, or carried over to your next season registration)

10. Schedule Requests: Teams will be limited to only 2 schedule requests this season.  (game times will be 10am, 11am, noon, 1pm, 2pm and 3pm) Early games are considered 10-12, late games are considered 1-3pm.  After you have registered and paid, you may then send in your schedule requests.  Please do so in a separate email with your team name and division in the subject line 

11. Topper Sports reserves the right to alter divisions as necessary based on registrations, knowledge of rosters, and competitiveness of individuals.

12. this site is for entertainment purposes only, any reference to you or your teammates or people who pop over here from other leagues may or may not be true, or slightly exaggerated.

 

 

Subcategories

So Uncle Topper sent me a note and basically said “GF I need you to do me a favor. I want you to handicap all (9) games for SITE. SITE is that really bad team in D3 with the really bad name. But they do have Gary who is our hero. Let’s see how Gary and Co will fare shall we…..

 

WEEK #1

SITE +32 VS GRYFFINDOR:  Oh come on Topper WTF. It’s bad enough you left SITE in D3 but now they have to face the greatest TSL’er of them all and perhaps of all time in Joey Batts. To make matters worse The Gryff signed Jeremy Burr which means bad news for SITE. OK here’s what will happen. SITE will put 2, 3 and sometimes 4 guys on Burr. Because Joey Batts likes a challenge he will still throw to Burr with 4 guys on him and will hit 75% of his passes. Poor brother Tony will be on the other side of the field uncovered but Joey will not look his way once. SITE will try and will score a whopping 6 point this week in route to a 53-6 loss. The bad news is SITE loses bad the good news is Gary wins the first ever TSL Topper’s Wheel of Hope spin this Saturday at 2:00. The bad news is Gary decided to also spin the secondary wheel and it lands on “valet park cars in a florescent traffic vest for 1 hour” later in the season. GRYFFINDOR BY 47

WEK #2: BYE WEEK

-Unbeknownst to Gray the rest of SITE takes his $100 Angry Buffalo gift certificate won on the  Topper’s wheel of Hope this Saturday at 2:00. They do the un-thinkable and set up a secret meeting with JZ. The remaining members of SITE plead with JZ to take them back as they were never as bad as they are now.  JZ looks at them and tells them “I will get back to you.” JZ also adds everyone on SITE as snapchat friends.

 

WEEK #3 DOUBLEHEADER

 

SITE +11 VS UNCLE RICO’S TIME TRAVELERS: SITE uses their brains this week. Fearing last week’s loss was on Gary they decide to have him serve his punishment during the game so while SITE is playing URTT Gary dons a flourescent traffic vest and must valet park cars for 1 hour. While he’s gone SITE plays the greatest game in their history and score at will. URTT has no clue what hit them as they can’t slow down SITE. The SITE defense looks refreshed as they slam the door on URTT as there are no longer gaping holes in their defense. SITE makes history and for the first time ever wins a game in week #2. They carry Jessica off the field who makes the decision to have Gary go valet park cars in a stunning 31-29 upset of Uncle Rico’s.    SITE WINS!!! SITE WINS!!!! 31-29

SITE +17 VS A&A: JZ is the bitter rival of SITE and last year was the only game they won. JZ is now on A&A. Matty Ice is no dummy and knows he is walking into a trap so he does the               right thing and makes JZ take the week off. This kills JZ inside. JZ can’t miss this game he won’t miss the game. JZ decides to go “incognito” and decides to go dress up as a homeless jobless  man. Yes JZ decides to dress up as B’s Brother. Matty Ice also knowing JZ would do this out flanks everyone as he places the call to the only man alive who can counter act all this silliness. Yes Matty Ice calls back Coach Van. The man with the head phones to the heavan’s makes his triumphant return and hands people his glorious pencil drawings of him having drunken couitus with a dead JZ corpse. SITE takes the field of battle and scores 11 TDS on JZ’s side of the field Lucky for A&A Matty Ice throws 12 tds in route to a 84-77 victory. JZ is promptly fired from A&A after this game. A&A 84-77

 

WEEK #4

SITE +21 VS MORNING WOOD: No one is happier this season than Mo Saleh. He won’t tell you this but I know two things: 1. He is in fact the godfather. 2. Mo was very afraid David “D Dub” Wilborn was heading to the Joey Batts super team.  I truly feel “D Dub” will be battling Jeremy Burr for most TDS this season in D3 and maybe the entire league. Having failed to cover Burr with 4 people Gary decides to cover “D Dub” with all 6 of his players. This of course fails miserably as well. Wilborn catches 9 TDS in route to an easy 63-12 victory. Rachel Parker stops by to check on Morning Wood and subsequently throat punches Gary twice then quits Morning Wood only to re-join them 7 minutes later. MORNING WOOD 63-12

 

WEEK #5: BYE WEEK

Things are bad for SITE as they are now 1-3. Things hit rock bottom for Gary as he secretly tries to go practice as he joins the weekly “football cult” with Emily and her disciples. Gary of course gets picked last and get torched for 13 tds in 23 minutes.

 

WEEK #6

SITE +6 vs STICKY BANDITS: OK now we are talking as SITE is only a 6 point underdog. SB is a solid team but they are hopping mad as they cry shenanigans as they are mad at TSL for forcing them to lose Dave Baker. SB knows Topper has a weird bromance going with Gary so they decide to make a point and they run up the score. Alex goes 78 for 79 for 167 yards and 8tds in route to a very easy 50-30 victory. After the loss Gary has a “players only meeting “ but only he shows up. STICKY BANDITS  50-30

 

SITE +7 VS COBBLESTONE FEATURING DARRYL CARR QB SUPERSTAR: OK now the stars are out. Gary slowly walks to the 50 for the coin flip and already is in awe of the greatness of Darryl Carr QB superstar. Gary gets lost in Darryl’s eyes. He is heard quietly mumbling “It’s magical, I mean how does a man get hair to look like that. There is a 25 MPH wind yet not one hair is out of place.” SITE is doing nothing through the air so Gary has a brilliant idea to try the wish bone offense because it worked in a college game he saw last week on TV. SITE rushes the ball 37 times for 13 yards in route to a depressing 38-6 loss. Darryl Carr goes Darryl Carr as he beats Gary for 5 TDS. Now that might sound like a lot but that is a huge improvement from last week. COBBLESTONE 38-6

 

WEEK #7

 

SITE +31 VS BULLET CLUB: Something doesn’t seem right. Gary just can’t put his finger on it. First play dude runs right by Gary, I know this isn’t surprising as most do but this guy was faster than normal. Then on the first play on offense the SITE QB tries to throw to Gary but Antoine Winfield pic 6 to the house. Gary finds out Antoine Winfield, Eric Moulds, Jerry Rice, Peyton Manning and Thurman Thomas now all play for Bullet Club. Once they are up 98-6 Joe K comes in for a play or two just to rub it in. Apparently Joe K finds a loop hole in the rule book where there is nothing against using former NFL or hall of fame players on your roster as they technically all only play “on one team” and ref a game or two. BULLET CLUB 98-6

 

 

WEEK #8

SITE +20 VS DMX: The game is played later in the day so at this point Topper has had too much to drink and Uncle Topper comes out and TSL starts burning to the ground. DMX seizes an opportunity goes and grabs their “mini ball” from the bag and they start making it rain out there. DMX starts crushing SITE with the long ball. Every time Uncle Topper walks but they put the small ball in the bag and then bring out the big one. They do this like 18x and send a cute girl over to Uncle Topper to keep him occupied in route to a solid 63-18 victory. They have now played 8 games and Gary has 0 TDS and has been beat on defense for 58 tds. DMX 63-18

 

WEEK #9

SITE +10 1 TOPPER TOO MANY: Team Topper needs this win to make the playoffs. The night before Drew sends Topper a message that he is going to get a tattoo of care bears and my little pony and will once again have to miss a must win football game. Topper once again looks up into the ski and cries “WHY GOD WHY?’ Topper tries something different without Drew instead of just beating Gary long like everyone else does he decides to beat Gray short and let his WRs run for gains. This strategy pays off as he scores 4 quick TDS. SITE tries everything they can to get Gray a TD but one pass bounces off his head, one breaks his sun glasses and one bounces right off his face. Though they try SITE loses a heart breaker 59-7. Team Toper heads to playoffs and once again gets bounced in the first round as Drew no shows the playoffs yet again. 1 Topper too many 59-7

 

OK so I just did the math and that makes 1-8 AGAIN. SITE will struggle to score and will struggle even more to stop people. Feeling bad Topeper hands Gary an award for “perfect attendance” at the banquet.

 

OK I’m beat that’s enough….CYA Saturday………..

 

 

*****Once again please join us at 2:00 for the first ever Topper’s Wheel of Hope wheel spin. Thanks to Angry Buffalo at the Rose Garden and Topper Sports for giving away a $100 Angry Buffalo gift certificate each week. Please note: you must be in the bar the time of the drawing to win. If it hits your team and you are not there we will spin again until there is a winner******

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