Week 3 thoughts, picks, and predictions

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Thursday, 05 September 2019 12:38

Published: Thursday, 05 September 2019 12:38

Written by Patrick McGovern

Hits: 13023

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, lend me your ears.

For it is in this very league, that one of life’s greatest wars will be played out on the battlefield in a few short weeks.

Tots. Vs. Fries.

As the great philosopher Road Dogg Jesse James once said: “Oh you didn’t know?”. Let me tell you. Our lovely little league can, at times, really turn a negative into a positive. For clarity’s sake, I’ll give you the full rundown. In Week 1, pAssless chaps were all set to play the Tater Tots in a D6 contest. The Chaps, however, could not field a team and gave the TSL brain trust (Okay, it was just Topper, and describing him as a “brain trust” is truly terrifying) more than enough notice to move the game. The Tots, at first, thought they were given the option to reschedule the game for later in the season or take the forfeit. In a very weak move (that would’ve garnered some serious shaming by yours truly I may add), the Tots asked for the victory when they didn’t like the idea of potentially playing the make up game later in the season, when it would be presumably colder and less “good weather-y”. A fair assumption, but a very weak move. Topper dropped the hammer almost instantaneously, informing them they have to play the game, since the Chaps gave more than enough notice on the need for a reschedule. And then, something beautiful blossomed.

In a fun email chain between the captains, Topper, and myself pAsseless Captain Shawn declared #FriesAreBetter. How he could think that was beyond me (they aren’t), but not only did the teams agree to the new game date (Week 7 at 3:00) we have our first major bet of the season that the loser will buy the winner some delicious food. If the Tots win, pAssless will buy them Tater Tots. If the Chaps win, a couple of large fries will be sent the Chaps’ way. The teams will have to pose together with the winning potato choice to show their D6 Unity, and all will be good with the world.

We have our first bet of the Fall 2019 season, and it’s a fun one. Who can top it?

(If I wasn’t clear: Tots are better.)

Let’s get into this week’s fun!

D1:

Last Week’s Games:

Public Enemy 29, Gryffindor 28

Eyes Downtown 36, Tight Ends in Motion 32

Eyes Downtown 44, Bullet Club 0 (D1/D2 Crossover)

Gryffindor 42, Dilfs 38 (D1/D2 Crossover)

Well, last week I definitely said “Let’s see if Gryffindor learned anything from last week” and it goes to show you that they sure as hell did. PE and Gryffindor put on a 10:00 show that featured scoring, end of game excitement (I’m pretty confident that Gryffindor went for two at the end of the game to go for the win and didn’t get it, I could be wrong though), and even a couple of people laying on the ground a few times (Mike Boccio and Amanda Werth, I believe). These two teams really put it on the line and it seems a fun rivalry may be brewing. Eyes Downtown used their light workout against Bullet Club to make sure they were ready for their real game against TEIM. It looked like it helped just enough as Bobby and Co walked away with a hard fought 4 point victory.

This Week’s Games:

Eyes Downtown vs Gryffindor (+7) – I’m not entirely sure which Gryffindor we’re going to get here. ED seems to be rolling now (after I talked about how they felt off last week, naturally). While both teams had close D1 games last week, ED murdered Bullet Club whereas Gryffindor had to fight to beat the Dilfs. The spread feels right, but one has to wonder if Eyes Downtown is looking past this game to the bigger battle against Public Enemy. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 6

Eyes Downtown vs Public Enemy (EVEN) – IT’S ON!!!! But, does anybody really care anymore? The anger, the vitriol, the absolute bitter “I truly hate this other team” attitude that both of these teams have for each other seems to have calmed down a little bit from what it used to be. Yes, both of these teams don’t like each other. No, they won’t hug. Yes, they’ll smack talk. But will it be the ‘MUST SEE TV’ it’s been in the past? YES. YES IT WILL. GET THREE REFS FOR THIS GAME. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 2

Marketing Mayors vs Gryffindor (+10) – In case anyone forgot, the D1 champs don’t wear red. They’re back after a week off and they’re looking to get a taste of Gryffindor. I’m not sure that, across the board, Batts and Co can keep up. MARKETING MAYORS BY 13

Marketing Mayors vs Tight Ends In Motion (+7) – Tight Ends had a heck of a good game against Eyes Downtown but they just couldn’t quite get the victory. That’ll happen. Next up for them is an even better team in the Mayors, and TEIM will need all of their horses to have their ducks in a row. Or something. MARKETING MAYORS BY 7

D2:

Last Week’s Games:

Bullet Club 34, We Back 8

Team Topper 49, Energy Buff 8

A&A 32, Peachy Platoon 28*

Slytherin That End Zone 37, Dilfs 36

A&A 34, Energy Buff 26

Am I supposed to feel bad for Peachy Platoon here? Look, I get it. They lost a game that, if the TSL had instant replay (Topper, where ARE the drones anyway?) it’d be overturned. But this is the TSL and even though Peachy appealed the call (Good on Topper for sticking to the results), things like this sometimes happen. Human error will always be a factor in ANY Social Co-Ed sport. Peachy is more than fine. They’re young, hyper athletic, all of them are some sort of handsome/beautiful (this includes the Team Parents on the sidelines, like, what a gene pool they have going over there, seriously), talented, and they’re some of the nicest people around. Plus, everyone makes the playoffs in D2, so the Platoon can just sit back and use this game as inspiration to get even better. I don’t know when it’s going to happen, but A&A vs Peachy Platoon Round 2 is coming. Hold onto your butts. You know who else is pretty good? Slytherin That End Zone. They’re sitting at 2-1 when they could be 3-0 if they pulled out the win against Peachy. They made a comeback against Bullet Club and now they’ve pulled off a 1 point win against the Dilfs. I think its finally fair to say that they deserve some respect, which almost guarantees them a huge disappointing loss this week. Team Topper (HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO) casually rolled Energy Buff with no issue. Bullet Club beat up on a shorthanded “We Back” team that seems to have forgotten to tell themselves that they’re “Back”, since they’ve yet to roll out a full team yet this season.

This Week’s Games:

We Back (+20) vs A&A – This is the biggest line I’ve ever given out I think. But it’s warranted. We Back has seemed to grossly overestimate their talents and has D4 written all over them for the Spring. Can Matty cover the spread? It’ll be interesting to see if he gets his full team here this week, but this one could be over very early. A&A BY 21

HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO vs Bullet Club (+13) – Bullet Club would be the story of how bad things can be going in D2 for a team if We Back and Energy Buff didn’t exist. While they were 19 seconds away from being 2-2, it doesn’t seem quite like they can keep up with the “Should be in D1 and its messing up the divisions a little bit” teams like PP, A&A, and well, Team Topper. Team Topper is a D2 team in a D1 team’s body, and that doesn’t bode well for the Club. Future D2 MVP Topper rolls. HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO BY 17

Dilfs (+10) vs Peachy Platoon – I think I’m being nice with this line. The Dilfs are a good team, don’t get me wrong, but they’re the first team to get to play the “chip on our shoulder” version of Peachy Platoon. Plus, the problem with specifically being an “Old Guy and Travis” team, is that they lack some overall team speed. Peachy, does not struggle with that issue. This could be a track meet for the Platoon. PEACHY PLATOON BY 10

D3:

Last Week’s Games:

Jabronies 41, Puckett All-Stars 28

End Game 29, Ultimate Warriors 23

All We Do Is Quinn 45, Puckett All-Stars 14

No Punt Intended 32, Vaspian 14

Sticky Bandits 39, All We Do Is Quinn 37

No Punt Intended 33, 3^rd and Schlong 19

Frodo Swaggins 30, Vaspian 26

All We Do Is Quinn (better known as Peachy Platoon’s little brothers) lost a HEARTBREAKER to Sticky Bandits this week. They had the highest of highs with a last second TD to take the lead after trailing the entire game. And then they give up the Hail Mary TD to blow it. And they wonder why they weren’t moved up a division? That can’t happen. No Punt Intended showed up with fresh new jerseys and a much better on field product. They cruised to two wins and have made an early claim to be in the title picture here. Rough day for Vaspian, but getting NPI and Frodo in a doubleheader is no easy task for a newer team. I still have faith in this squad. If NPI and Frodo is a bad draw, how about getting Quinn and Jabronies? Puckett may have gone 0-2, but if they can make a few necessary adjustments they’ll be okay in this division. Speaking of Jabronies, so far so good for them as they made the jump to D3. 1-0-1 is a good start. End Game squeaked out a win against the Warriors, who were a bad throw or two away from taking this one.

This Week’s Games:

Ultimate Warriors (+10) vs All We Do Is Quinn – These teams played each other a few times not too long ago at the end of last season. Quinn was pretty dominant in those contests, and even though the Warriors have a QB now, I don’t think he’s the difference maker in this one. ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 14

End Game vs Puckett All-Stars (EVEN) – A fun rematch from last season’s D4 playoffs that saw Puckett knock off the heavily favored End Game en route to their championship. There’s no way End Game didn’t spend all summer preparing for revenge. Here’s hoping Puckett brings the entire team and we see another awesome battle. END GAME BY 1

Sticky Bandits vs 3^rd And Schlong (+8) – “Dad? Dad, come on. You’ve gotta get up.” – Simba, The Lion King. Whenever I see “3^rd and Schlong” lately, that’s exactly how I feel. My mind races to Simba trying to wake up Mufasa after he’s died. And I feel like I’m Simba here, just trying to wake 3AS up. The TSL is a better place when they’re good. Sticky, however, IS good. They’re playing the kind of football they’re accustomed to, and the wins are following. This is a game of two teams trending in different ways. STICKY BANDITS BY 10

Jabronies (+3) vs All We Do Is Quinn – The first big test for Joe Miano and his various Klecklers comes this week in the form of Peachy Platoon’s JV squad. The Quinners are NO slouches, and with Sticky surprising them last week, they’re going to be on their toes not to be upset again. This battle should be a very good one. ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 4

D4:

Last Week’s Games:

Full Throttle 50, Buffalo Solar Solutions 30

Matty’s Angels 64, Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers 6

Cunning Stunts 49, Mountain Dew Me 22

Let’s give a shout out to Full Throttle! That’s a big win for them, its showing that they’re improving each session. I still don’t know if they have what it takes to beat one of the gender teams, but it’s a start! As much as I want to rag on Uncle Rico’s for getting mauled, I’m not going to. Word is they were missing some stars, and on top of it all, I kind of said this was going to happen. The Angels are mad, look out. Meanwhile, in other gender team news, the Stunts showed up and looked like they’re in midseason form. Many reports suggest Mountain Dew Me shows lots of promise however, and I’m looking forward to seeing how they progress.

This Week’s Games:

Matty’s Angels vs Full Throttle (+14) – Full Throttle is improving, but this is the litmus test for the division. All roads to the D4 title lead here. MATTY’S ANGELS BY 14

Mountain Dew Me (+7) vs Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers – It’ll be interesting to see how URTT looks when they trot out the entire squad. MDM isn’t a team they can sleep on it seems, so this game will give us the real look at how Rico’s matches up this session. UNCLE RICO’S TIME TRAVELERS BY 7

Buffalo Solar Solutions (+8) vs Cunning Stunts – I’m not entirely sure how Buffalo Solar lost to Full Throttle by 20 last week, so I’m going to assume they’ll be a little better this week. The Stunts have two games this week, and with Joey already having two before that, there’s a chance his arm falls off. CUNNING STUNTS BY 7

Cunning Stunts vs Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers (+8) – Seriously, by Game 4 of the day, Joey’s arm may actually fall off. That’s perfect timing for an Uncle Rico’s squad that’s looking to make a mark in the division. I still think the girls pull this out though. CUNNING STUNTS BY 3

D5:

Last Week’s Games:

En Fuego 32, Hope N Ruin 20

Practice Squad 34, Come From Behind 32

Over Compensators 44, Hung Buffalo 27

Practice Squad 32, Hung Buffalo 27

En Fuego gets all of the credit in the world for two things: having fun and wearing jorts. If they’re going to hide themselves in D5, the least they can do is be fun and not troublemakers. An easy win against Hope N Ruin for them. PRACTICE SQUAD! The D6 champs continue looking right at home in the division, going 2-0 this week, and find themselves at 3-0 overall. But they’re only second in the division because the Over Compensators are continuing the hot streak they started in the spring. D5 is really shaping up as the best division in terms of “who the hell is going to win this one?”. The games are close, and fun.

This Week’s Games:

Hung Buffalo vs Hope N Ruin (+3) – Both of these teams need to come out with a win, as they sit at 0-2 on the season. Hung Buffalo hung in there this week against Practice Squad and the OC, and with word from the fields coming in that HNR is already fighting internally, look for Hung Buffalo to take this one. HUNG BUFFALO BY 7

Cobblestone (+7) vs Come From Behind – CFB almost pulled off the win against Practice Squad, but they came up short. Just when they need a win, the fates send them Cobblestone. This game is going to be a close one. COME FROM BEHIND BY 3

Practice Squad vs En Fuego (EVEN) – Practice Squad has shown enough this early in the season to be considered even with En Fuego. Blasé and his team should be running away with this division, but this is really their first test to see just how ahead of the rest of the contenders they are. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 2

Over Compensators vs Pink Pteratacos (+8) – The OC is really rolling in this division right now, and they’re looking to keep their hot streak going against a Pteratacos team that can really make a mark of their own in the division this week with a big doubleheader. If the Pteratacos want to be taken seriously as a D5 title contender, this is the game they’re going to need to win. OVER COMPENSATORS BY 6

En Fuego vs Pink Pteratacos (+10) – On the back end of a doubleheader for both teams, this game could loom large for them, especially if En Fuego loses to Practice Squad. Both teams could be looking at avoiding going 0-2 on the day, which (considering the sometimes volatile personalities on either side) could lead to some fireworks. EN FUEGO BY 7

D6:

Last Week’s Games:

Blitzkrieg 42, The Replacements 30

Tater Tots 40, Zack Attack 18

The Bi-Polar Express 50, Wild Oak Beard Co. 8

Zack Attack 61, Shattered Dreams 20

TMA 46, Shattered Dreams 6

Graves Bros 20, pAssless Chaps 13

The Bi-Polar Express keeps chugging along here, as Gordon and the girls find themselves at 2-0 and on top of the division. This is the best start in the team’s short history, and it looks like they’re finally figuring things out. The Tots showed up and blew out Zack Attack, establishing early dominance in the division where nobody really knows who’s going to be good or bad just yet. Zack Attack would go onto to bludgeon Shattered Dreams, who had what we’ll nicely call “a rough first day at the office” after a not so nice game against TMA either. Graves Bros stuck their flag in the ground and showed the division that they’re going to be a force to be reckoned with this season, earning a win over D6 title favorite pAssless Chaps. And Blitzkrieg showed that it wasn’t a fluke they hung with BPX last week, earning their first win in the TSL.

This Week’s Games:

Blitzkrieg vs Wild Oak Beard Co (+10) – One team lost to BPX by 3, the other lost to them by 42. Since I don’t know too much about either team, that’s all I have to go on. It appears, based solely on these few facts that I know, that Blitzkrieg is probably a bit better. BLITZKRIEG BY 8

pAssless Chaps vs Shattered Dreams (+13) - Shattered Dreams were exactly that for themselves last week, as they lost their two games by a combined 107-26. While it’s not unheard of for a brand new team to struggle, that may have been a little overboard. The Chaps are also coming off a loss to Graves Bros, but with Coach Jay at the helm of this ship, you know they’re going to rebound and learn from it. PASSLESS CHAPS BY 10

The Bi-Polar Express vs Tater Tots (+6) – Word has trickled in that Gordon will be out this week, which means Non-Award Winning Tommy Hughes will step in for him at QB. The Tater Tots were impressive in their win last week, but the real story here is Drunk Meg taking on Drunk Meg’s Boyfriend With The Beard in this contest. THE BIPOLAR EXPRESS BY 8

The Replacements (+9) vs TMA – TMA has a QB and all seems right with the world. I’ve said it before, when TMA is happy, and they’re on, look out. This isn’t to say Ferger was the worst QB of all time or anything like that, but when you improve at the most important position AND you get Ferger out there to be a receiver as well, good things happen. The Replacements (not to be confused with The Replacements from a few seasons ago) seem to be figuring things out still, and they’re getting TMA at the wrong time. TMA by 10

Zack Attack (+7) vs Graves Bros – Graves Bros are looking strong out of the gate in D6, but not to be out done, so are Zack Attack. The two new teams are a combined 4-1 on this young season, so this is a pretty early “high profile” matchup. While a loss for either team shouldn’t hurt their playoff chances, this is a really good marker to see just where both teams stand in the division. GRAVES BROS BY 5

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

1.      Can Public Enemy and Eyes Downtown recapture the true rivalry hate that we’ve come to know and love? The game is still a must watch, for sure.

2.      How will Joey Batts hold up? Our tiny hero has four games this week, and one has to assume that he’s going to be exhausted by the day’s end.

3.      What’s the deal with the referees? Rameer’s rant was pretty clear on this, but I’ll reiterate that your comments have been heard, and the issues with refereeing are being dealt with behind the scenes. When you have an issue with anything in this league, find your nearest Topper, Rameer, Joe K, Val, Emily, etc and let them know asap.

4.      Will there be music again? It was AWESOME to hear that DJ Jimmy showed up to the fields to play music again just like it was back in the day. Here’s hoping that keeps up.

5.      Have you taken advantage of the TSL Specials at the Rose Garden? After many years of clamoring for some, the league has finally gotten what they’ve been asking for. Go get those wings and drinks people!

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

1.      It’d be really cool if B’s Brother would show up to the fields sometime soon. Honestly, there’s so many new teams that haven’t had the honor of getting to meet a living TSL Hall of Famer that really should.

2.      Shout out to Emily Curry, who was reportedly walking around the fields this week with a notebook in order to write down cool things to talk about on the TSL Podcast with Joe K this week. She’s going the extra mile it seems and deserves some credit. Looking forward to hearing it.

3.      Here’s my guide to the best games at each time:

a.      10:00 – Field 4 – Hung Buffalo vs Hope N Ruin

b.      11:00 – Field 2 – End Game vs Puckett All-Stars

c.       12:00 – Field 1 – Eyes Downtown vs Public Enemy

d.      1:00 – Field 3 – Practice Squad vs En Fuego

e.      2:00 – Field 2 – Jabronies vs All We Do Is Quinn

4.      Thank you to the few of you that have emailed me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. ! Its been great getting to know a few new people of the league. Please, shoot me an email if you want some publicity.

5.      With the championships happening on October 26, there’s slight murmuring of the return of the Halloween Costume Drunk Bowl for an after party…

6.      I’ll say this for Rameer: Don’t bother trying to get on the Universal Sub List, its basically set in stone as it is, and its NOT a way to get people an extra game. Each week people ask me if they can get on it as though I have any say in that. I don’t, and you won’t.

7.      The world is a better place when people like Award Winning Tommy Hughes, Dave Walter, and Paul Scinta are at the fields constantly. WHERE ARE THEY?

8.      It was good to see that the TSL pulled off a ridiculous 24 person fantasy football draft (It would’ve been nice to be a part of, by the way) chock full of a lot of the league’s biggest characters. There was even a really cool looking championship belt for it. Props to everyone that took part in it, as it’s yet another reason that the TSL is more than just a football league, it’s a family.

9.      We may have to start taking applications for the Banquet Committee. Lenny was such a huge part of our annual tradition’s success and there’s no one person that can just show up and fill his shoes when it comes to that. I’m pretty confident Topper isn’t going to be able to do it all himself, so we’ll have to be there for him. If you want in on this adventure and are willing to help with it, email me and we’ll get this started.

10.   Seriously though, Tots > Fries.

And with that, we’re on to Week 3. Be responsible, have fun out there, and treat everyone with respect. The league’s script is unfolding before your very eyes, pay attention to it all, there’s lots of great football being playing in every single division. What crazy turn will it take this week? I don’t know but I can’t wait to hear about it.

Great catch, Taylor Pagano.

The Godfather Fall 2019 Kickoff Article

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 23 August 2019 12:48

Published: Friday, 23 August 2019 12:48

Written by Patrick McGovern

Hits: 5837

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe:

On Saturday, August 24^th, in the Year of Our Lord 2019, the sun will be shining. The wind may blow ever so slightly from the Northeast, and in Partly Cloudy weather the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality will once again begin!

Just a few short months ago we saw Marketing Mayors, Gryffindor, Slytherin That End Zone, Puckett All-Stars, Cunning Stunts, and Practice Squad walk away with championships. Some of them were a bit of a surprise, and some of them were not. But on August 24^th none of those past accomplishments will matter as we hit the proverbial “reset button” and everyone in the league begins with a 0-0 record and hopes are renewed!

This season, 47 of the finest Co-ed football teams in Western New York will descend upon the Rose Garden to do battle once again. This season brings a lot of questions to the TSL. Gone are some stalwart teams in the league (We’ll miss you #XTC), but what’s more exciting is that we’re growing.

Yes, the usual TSL teams have taken the Fall session off, HOWEVER, they’ve been replaced by an astounding TEN brand new teams that have joined the TSL! Granted, a few of these teams are some retread teams with a few new players and a different name, but quite a few of them are completely, brand spanking new. And to those teams I say: Welcome to the TSL!

Since there’s so many new teams to this league, allow myself to introduce myself. I am The Godfather. I write a weekly article where I talk about league happenings and make picks for the next week’s games. I was once a TSLer just like you, but life and fate took me all the way to Des Moines, Iowa, where I sit back and hear all about the TSL and give my opinions. I used to get a lot of my information from our dearly departed Commissioner Lenny Alba, but since then multiple sources from the league have popped up to give me intel from the Saturday games.

To the new teams, I say this: If you want to be recognized, just email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. and tell me why you’re going to be the next big thing in the Topper Sports League. I look forward to speaking to you guys.

Same goes for you “Teams who have been in the league for a while and don’t get enough credit and publicity”. Let me know why YOU matter. Or why someone on your team matters more. We love our TSL All-Stars, and perhaps the next one could be you!

Let me give the new guys an explanation here. The TSL, well, we’re a family. Everyone who crosses those fields, whether they know it or not, immediately become a part of that family. It’s up to you to decide just how deeply you want to get into things. If you just play your game and head home? Well, that’s perfectly alright. But if you want to play your game and hang out at the bar for while? That’s even better. When you’re there, you’ll see a LOT of awesome people. I know you might suffer from a case of social anxiety, but put yourself out there and say hello to some new friends. You’ll see a ton of great people, starting with Topper himself (seriously, he doesn’t know who you are so introduce yourself!), and it trickles down to a lot of awesome people like Rameer, The first lady of the TSL Val Bernal, Val Testa (Yes, we have two Vals), 40 Year Plan Guy, The league Icon Darryl Carr, Joe K, Travis, Katie rhymes with Heller, the Clarke twins, Ferger, Brent!, Second Shift Dave Walter, Emily Curry, Emily 2.0, Coach Jay, the Jabronies, the plant that Eric Klecker murdered one year, B’s Brother, Jeff Krol, and a HOST of other amazing people that are all waiting to welcome new people into the family to hang out and have a great time each and every Sunday.

Like I said, this is a family. Sometimes we fight, sure, but for the most part we hang out and have fun and we do it so much more often than just on “Football Saturdays”. But Saturdays at the Rose Garden are where it all begins. The family is always looking for new members and we accept everyone. Please reach out, and get involved!

Each week, on this website, you should be seeing various fun articles. The Rant comes straight from the Director of Officiating Rameer Green himself. He has NO problem calling people out for their nonsense. The Sentinel, whoever they are, proceeds to recap the weekend’s games. The QB Power Rankings is a lot more than just ranking the QBs! The team over there (however many there are, I don’t know) will also give you a bevy of stats just waiting for you salivate over. And then there’s me, The Godfather. There’s literally no telling what I’ll write about. And on top of it all, word is flowing that Joe K is definitely bringing back the TSL Podcast, where he’s going to need many of you to guest and star on. So if you want to be heard and call out the league? That’s the place to be! Email him at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. I believe.

I know for a fact that we’re incredibly excited to have all of you around for another fantastic edition of the TSL. Shout out to Topper for having the wonderful foresight to move the season up a few weeks in order to lessen the risk of the championships being playing in the snow in November. For the next 10 weeks, its game on as teams try to go the extra mile to win the most prestigious co-ed football titles in WNY.

But what’s really going to matter is the friends we’re about to make along the way.

So go out there to the fields, make some new friends (Seriously, make it a point to talk to one new person each week. Your life will be better for it.), wear some sunscreen, and have fun out there. Remember that as intense as the games can get, this is ALL FOR FUN. Treat the refs with respect. Treat your teammates and your opponents with respect. Have fun. It’s all about to go down. Now get out there, play some games, and have some excellent dance competitions or something. Be excited! I know I am, and I’m not even at the fields each week.

Welcome back everyone, I’ve missed you.

Go get ‘em.

Week 2 Thoughts Picks and Predictions

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 30 August 2019 12:42

Published: Friday, 30 August 2019 12:42

Written by Patrick McGovern

Hits: 23086

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe:

We’re off! The Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality is officially started and I, for one, couldn’t be more excited. There’s nothing better then watching the best of the best Co-ed football teams square off against one another. Every season is like its own movie. There’s twists and turns. The plot gets some unexpected heroes, some expected villians, and there’s always that M. Night Shamalyan “HOLY CRAP” moment at the end that really gets you when you THOUGHT you knew how things were going to go.

This is why we come out, season after season, to see how each story is going to unfold. It’s on me to be your narrator, to guide you through a whole bunch of silly nonsense and help you along the way. If you’ve ever paid attention, you should know that I already know everything, and with that, I’ll be able to tell you exactly what’s going to happen this season. So here you go:

D1:

The Contenders: Marketing Mayors, Public Enemy

The Next Best: Eyes Downtown, Tight Ends In Motion

Gryffindor: Gryffindor

Last Week’s Scores

Marketing Mayors 42, Eyes Downtown 16

Public Enemy 33, Gryffindor 13

Tight Ends In Motion 35, Gryffindor 0

Marketing Mayors 39, Energy Buff 19 (D1/D2 Crossover Game)

Joey Batts gets all of the credit in the world for finally going back to D1 with a Gryffindor team that, 4 years ago, was in D4. Unfortunately, his return didn’t go as well as he had planned. A 20 point loss to Public Enemy and a beat down by TEIM isn’t the best start, but it’s a young season so he’ll have time to figure things out. At least he went up to “The Show”, which is more than we can say for some teams. (Hi Matty!) As for the rest of the division, something feels off with Eyes Downtown. I felt it last season too. I just have this feeling there’s some inner turmoil and I’m not sure if its Bobby related or not. It’ll be interesting to watch this division unfold, but I feel like we’re on the way to Marketing Mayors vs Public Enemy, which at this point might be what the people want anyway.

This Week’s Games:

Gryffindor (+17) vs Public Enemy - The downside to us only having 5 D1 teams is that you get to play each other a lot. Hopefully Gryffindor can put up a better fight and show us that they’ve learned something from last week. PUBLIC ENEMY BY 15

Tight Ends In Motion (+8) vs Eyes Downtown – Just because I’m feeling like the internal downfall of Eyes Downtown might be on the horizon, doesn’t mean that they’re a bad team. They still know how to play, and while I expect TEIM to be a much better team this season (as is usually the case when a team settles on one QB instead of three), there’s still a matter having to see them prove it on the field. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 6

D2:

The Contenders: Peachy Platoon, A&A, HOFBRAHAUS BUFFALO (this is Topper’s team)

The Next Level: Dilf’s, Slytherin That End Zone

It’s a Good Thing Everyone Makes Playoffs:  Bullet Club, Energy Buff, We Back

Last Week’s Scores:

Dilf’s 27, Energy Buff 18

Peachy Platoon 61, Bullet Club 20

Slytherin That End Zone 32, Bullet Club 26

HOFBRAHAUS BUFFALO 58, We Back 8

Peachy Platoon 43, SITE 30

The offseason for D2 became quite the arms race. A&A added Jay German as they were expecting to go to D1 before Matty pulled a “Joey Batts” and got scared and stayed down longer. (To be fair, once they won D2, Joey HAD to go up after many seasons of hiding). Team Topper prepared for this a season ahead of time, went to D1, signed Pete, and then snuck back down to D2 with a name change. There’s ZERO way Lenny would’ve let Topper take Pete to D2 by the way. This lawless land with no Topper restrictions is a scary place now. Peachy Platoon, who was moved up to D2 early on in the offseason, added Dave Wilbern and his sidekick, Mo Saleh. Energy Buff went out and added Coach Jay! The Dilf’s weren’t really a team, but they’re basically a form of #XTC (RIP) with Val Bernal, Travis, and Katie Keller added to the squad. Bullet Club’s response to all of this? Lose Paul Nieman and Travis to free agency, and Sarah Donogher for a season due to pregnancy (congrats!). Just kidding, they added Ricky Austin at QB and in a sneaky good move added Chris Nelson to the team as well. I have no idea how all of this is going to play out, but currently it doesn’t feel like anyone can stop Peachy. They’re just so fast. Bullet Club didn’t stand a chance when they were (not surprisingly) missing people. Slytherin gave Peachy a much better game however. The Dilf’s used their combined 4,023 years of experience to give them the edge over Energy Buff. Topper absolutely SHREDDED We Back, who might have picked the wrong division to start “back” in.

This Week’s Games:

We Back (+7) vs Bullet Club – It’s Week 2, and already we see our first “must win” game of the season. Granted, all of these D2 teams will make the playoffs, but considering just how poorly both teams looked last week, they need the good vibes. It’s been said that both teams were missing players so hopefully Joe K and Sal can get their rosters to actually show up to the fields this week. But based on what I’m seeing and hearing, I can only go this route: BULLET CLUB BY 4

Energy Buff (+10) vs HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO  - I’m already sick of typing that name. And why is Topper putting his own team’s name in all capital letters? Is it to make it easier to see on the schedule? It’s those types of tricky veteran moves that keeps that man alive in this league. Team Topper might have had a rough go in D1 last season, but they’ve learned a LOT in that division. They’re going to keep applying what they learned in a competitive D2 this season for sure. Energy Buff is a team that always plays hard, and I know they have a few reinforcements coming this week as well. The thing that matters the most is this: DON’T LET BOTH TEAMS BRING ONLY GRAY. HOFBRUHAUS BUFFALO BY 12

A&A (+3) vs Peachy Platoon – This is purely a line driven out of respect for Peachy’s Week 1. A&A didn’t play since Matty was off jet setting around the country as he does. That may mean there’s a bit of rust for them to shake off, since the roster is a bit different from last season. PEACHY PLATOON BY 10

Dilf’s vs Slytherin That End Zone (EVEN) – I wasn’t sure what to put this game at. Last week, Slytherin looked very good. The Dilf’s weren’t looking too bad either, cruising to their win (WITH JOHNNY F’N DIO!). I just think SITE is a bit more locked in right now, and Newman really looks to climb up the QB Rankings this season. SLYTHERIN THAT END ZONE BY 3

Energy Buff (+10) vs A&A – I have a feeling A&A might “wake up” when they have to go against Peachy earlier in the day, and I don’t think that will be a good thing for Energy Buff. I just see A&A doing everything they can to score 50 points this game and walk away with a win. A&A BY 10

There’s actually two D1/D2 Crossover games this week as well:

Gryffindor vs Dilf’s (EVEN) – I have no reason to give Gryffindor any credit after last week’s melt down. The Dilf’s have a team full of players that have played in D1 before and as a result, these teams are a lot more even that it seems. DILF’S BY 3

Bullet Club (+14) vs Eyes Downtown – If Bullet Club trots out the same roster as last week, Bobby should eat them apart. If they trot out the roster they claim to have, Bobby might eat them apart. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 12

D3:

The Contenders: All We Do Is Quinn, Frodo Swaggins

The Next Level: Sticky Bandits, No Punt Intended, Vaspian, Jabronies

That Interesting Level That I Can’t Really Figure Out How It’ll Go In This Season: Puckett All-Stars, End Game, Ultimate Warriors

The Honeymoon Is Over Maybe: 3^rd And Schlong

Last Week’s Games:

Ultimate Warriors 49, Jabronies 49

Frodo Swaggins 30, Puckett All-Stars 20

All We Do Is Quinn 45, End Game 36

Vaspian 43, 3^rd And Schlong 37

All We Do Is Quinn 55, 3^rd And Schlong 31

Sticky Bandits 25, End Game 8

To be clear, I HATE putting 3AS at the bottom of the rankings here, but lets face it: They haven’t been good for a while now and something’s missing. I don’t know if they’re in need of another good player, or if Katie’s googly eyes at certain handsome Dilf’s have distracted her from remembering how to properly defend the field with her FAMILY. AWDIQ is chock full of bitterness with their “WHAT ABOUT ME? WHAT ABOUT RAVEN?” attitude because the powers that be moved up Peachy Platoon and ignored them completely. Quinn was good last season, but with a chip on their shoulder? Look out D3. Frodo Swaggins has a fantastic QB in Scotty Drosendahl (word is he’s cool as hell too), and as long as Garrett doesn’t ruin thing with calling his own number too much (He got old, it happens), this Swaggins squad is top notch. Sticky Bandits can never be counted out, and while Alex has a broken hand of some sorts (He’s always injured now it seems), Rags has come back from injury to throw the ball for the team. Or is it Mike Thomas now? Perhaps with things like weddings, injuries, medical school, and other nonsense out of the way, they can get back to doing what they do best: winning football games. No Punt Intended added Glenn and Chelsie Bird and Rachel Parker from the defunct GLBS squad, which may have been exactly what was needed for them to be true contenders instead of the up and down team we’ve seen the past few seasons. Vaspian, I think, isn’t a completely new team, but I didn’t do my proper homework on them. I’ve heard that they’re going to be a solid team, and I look forward to hearing more about them. The Jabronies have made a Quinn/Peachy leap directly into D3. Why? The addition of a few Klecklers. Joe Miano has made strides as a QB since he started to throw the ball, and that shouldn’t go unnoticed. The Ultimate Warriors have awesome new jerseys, and they have Sam slinging the ball the way she always should. The more notable acquisition here, however, is QB Scott Pinto, who played last season with the now defunct Money Ball. The Warriors were on the wrong end of too many close games last session, but getting set at QB is going to be HUGE for them. Puckett All-Stars deserves all of the credit in the world. They were a low seed in last year’s D4 playoffs after a rough season, and won it all. Instead of hiding back in D4, they went right up to D3, like a champion should. End Game deserves some credit here too. Despite losing the title game last season, they still went up (they were probably going to be made to regardless) and they never once complained. Both of these teams have already faced the ‘top tier’ and gave them both good games this season, so they look right at home.  

This Week’s Games:

Puckett All-Stars (+8) vs Jabronies – This game is going to be a heck of a game. Right now, the only reason I’m giving the Jabronies a bit more credit is because of what their roster looks like. How they end up using those players is a different thing altogether. While I wouldn’t sleep on the reigning D4 champs, I’m still going with my gut here. JABRONIES BY 7

Ultimate Warriors vs End Game (EVEN) – Both teams had good showings last week. I know that End Game went 0-2, but they kept it close with Quinn, and then to have to play a fresh Sticky Bandits right after wasn’t fair. The Warriors need to keep doing what they’ve done for a while now, and play smart. They know better than anyone the gender TD game, and if they keep their cool, they should be looking at a 1-0-1 record to start this season off. ULTIMATE WARRIORS BY 10

Puckett All-Stars (+10) vs All We Do Is Quinn – Quinn is HOT. I know they are. They should be on a mission to prove to everyone that they’re not Peachy’s little brother. They boast fantastic players like Rawdog and Cat (Kat?) Peters, and their mission is fixing last season’s D3 championship loss. Puckett is good, but Quinn is on another level. AWDIQ BY 15

Vaspian vs No Punt Intended (EVEN) – It’s hard for me to really make a line on a game when I don’t full know how both rosters are going to look this season. This game will really tell me how things are going to go for both teams this season. Can one of these squads look to make a leap into the D3 title picture? NO PUNT INTENDED BY 3

All We Do Is Quinn vs Sticky Bandits (+3) – I really hope that I’m not doing what I did last season, where I’m giving Sticky a bit too much respect. I still think they’re a great team and they have one of the game’s most brilliant football minds in Jeff Krol (Dave Baker is no slouch either). Can Sticky figure out how to properly slow down Quinn? I’m not so sure. AWDIQ BY 6

No Punt Intended vs 3^rd and Schlong (+3) – I really hope the injury to 40 Year Plan Guy isn’t significant. He was seen limping around the bar last week, and may have been a big reason things didn’t go so well for 3AS last week. Perhaps it’s time for 3AS to find a third girl? Nicole and Katie are great, for sure, but being able to add that third girl near the end zone could do wonders for them. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 3

Vaspian (+7) vs Frodo Swaggins – Scotty Too Hotty is looking ready to sling it and is a dark horse D3 MVP candidate this season. If Frodo struggles anywhere, it’s with consistency. Sometimes they look like world beaters, other times they look like D4 might have been a better option. It usually more of the former than the latter, but if they can figure out a way to stay consistent, they pose a big threat to Quinn. Vaspian needs to come ready to fight this game. A win here really puts them on the map, and perhaps I can learn someone’s name from this team (Save for Vaspian, I guess, which is the Captain’s last name). FRODO SWAGGINS BY 13

D4:

The Contenders:  Matty’s Angels, Cunning Stunts

The Next Level:  Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers, Buffalo Solar Solutions

Keep On Truckin’: Mountain Dew Me, Full Throttle

Last Week’s Game:

Full Throttle 28, Mountain Dew Me 14

There just isn’t a TON to say about D4. They’re in this weird awkward stage where the best teams went up to D3, or folded. Now Full Throttle, Buffalo Solar, and Uncle Rico’s are looking around going “What?”. What was a strong 10 team division has become a weird six team division this time around. Mountain Dew Me joins the ranks, and while I don’t know much about them, I know they lost to Full Throttle, who was the 9^th best team in D4 last season. That may not bode well. On top of it all, those beautiful buzzsaws that are BOTH gender teams in Cunning Stunts and Matty’s Angels moved up to D4 to continue their constant rivalry. I haven’t heard much from who left/joined those teams either. I don’t have a good feel on this division because of it, but it looks like we’re going to see how the non-gender teams deal with the gender teams. Good luck out there.

This Week’s Games:

Full Throttle (+10) vs Buffalo Solar Solutions – Buffalo Solar had a pretty good year last season. They started out hot, lost it a bit in the middle of the season, but got things together and ended up losing the championship game to Puckett. Full Throttle had a nice start, but I’m going to continue to base things off of last season here. BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS BY 14

Uncle Rico’s Time Traveler’s (+13) vs Matty’s Angels – I apologize to Jon Senn now, but “the show” is coming into town. Don’t be disrespected by the 13 point spread, but quite frankly the Angels are hopping mad after last season’s disappointing loss to the Stunts in the session’s final game. Matty has gotten over his heatstroke, and the girls are ready to avenge that loss. This is a hell of a litmus test for Uncle Rico’s right out of the gate, but if they can hang, they’ll know they can take this D4 title. MATTY’S ANGELS BY 13

Mountain Dew Me (+17) vs Cunning Stunts -  No offense to our new team, but the Queens are here, and this will be their first appearance since winning the D5 title a few months ago. I’m positive that they want to put on a clinic right away to remind everyone just who the dominant ladies’ team is. CUNNING STUNTS BY 14

D5:

The Contenders: En Fuego, Practice Squad

The Next Level: Hung Buffalo, Over Compensators, Hope N Ruin, Pink Pteratacos

D6 isn’t THAT bad: Cobblestone, Come From Behind

Last Week’s Games:

Over Compensators 59, Hope N Ruin 35

Over Compensators 36, Cobblestone 20

En Fuego 43, Come From Behind 14

Practice Squad 35, Pink Pteratacos 18

First off, THANK YOU BLASÉ LADUCA. It hurts to say that, but he was smart enough to realize how stupid being called the “Ugandan Warriors” was when we had the “Ultimate Warriors” already in the league. He did us all a solid and changed his name. Now, I get to mess with him. Because let’s face it Blasé, you guys walked through this division last season, as long as there were more than one male on the field. The only thing you had left to prove in D5 was that you could beat one of the gender teams, and you couldn’t. So while BOTH of them moved up to a SIX team D4, you’re still hiding in D5? WHY? You want to bark at the QB Rankings team about how you should be so much higher, yet you’re running from your competition? Interesting. With that said, En Fuego is good, and this is their division to lose. Some people may think I have Practice Squad a little too high here, but the D6 champs have a great blend of talent and skill. Renee will always have her team ready to go. Hung Buffalo is always a tough out, and I didn’t hear about them playing last week, so we’ll have to see if they added any new wrinkles to the team. The Over Compensators are my dark horse in this division. After starting last season out really rough, they started to catch fire! They were one of the league’s hottest teams down the stretch last season, and it seems that they’re already building on that! I don’t mean to rain on Cobblestone’s parade so much. They’re AWESOME people, and they DO have the living legend in Darryl Carr QB Superstar. The problem for them has be that maybe, just mayyyyybe Darryl *might* not be as Superstary as he has been in the past. Hope N Ruin is another solid team that, from what I know, is the same group of people that always makes a run at this title and can never be counted out. Come From Behind is always a ton of fun, but it seems they’ve been winning more than losing as of late. Finally, the Pink Pteratacos are a good team when they have everyone on the same page and have a winning attitude. The problem is that Mark and Joe tend to argue like, well, father and son, and it derails the team way too much. Do they still have the #55 girl? She was a monster last season. Mark never emailed me to give her the proper respect so I could know her name. I blame him.

This Week’s Games:

Hope N Ruin (+10) vs En Fuego – Until someone stops En Fuego, they may be double digit point favorites every step of the way. This is a very good test for Hope N Ruin to see how they’re going to be this season. EN FUEGO BY 13

Come From Behind (+7) vs Practice Squad – I just got done talking up Practice Squad a bit, but you know what this game reminds me of? It’s like in Mike Tyson’s Punch Out where you had to work your way up the ladder in your new circuit. Come From Behind isn’t “Glass Joe” (Cobblestone), but they’re a very solid Piston Honda, and if PS blinks, it’ll be lights out. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 1

Hung Buffalo (+3) vs Over Compensators – The OC is becoming one of my favorite teams and I don’t have a really great answer to why. But who cares? I say this EVERY TIME I talk about Hung Buffalo but they’re a very good team that knows how to win games. Sometimes, knowing how to do something and actually doing it are two different things though. Assuming HB doesn’t have an ace up their sleeve, I like the OC here. OVERCOMPENSATORS BY 7

Hung Buffalo (+7) vs Practice Squad - Okay, if Come From Behind is Piston Honda, then Hung Buffalo is Bald Bull. They’re going to give you hell if you let them. Another interesting matchup that will really tell us if PS can hang in D5 or not. The difference here may be that PS will have two hours off to rest while HB is playing two in a row. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 3

D6:

The Contenders: The Bi-Polar Express, TMA, pAssless Chaps

The Rest:  Seriously, everyone else.

Last Week’s Games:

Zack Attack 34, Wild Oak Beard Co 15

The Bi-Polar Express 36, Blitzkrieg 33

Graves Bros 35, TMA 8

I’m pretty confident in saying that 7 of the 10 teams in D6 are some sort of brand new team. It appears that The Replacements are run by Payton Spinelli of “Cellino Sewer Rats/Five Star Generals” fame, so perhaps that’s who they are under a new name? No idea who Wild Oak Beard Co is but they already sound awesome! I imagine all of them have sweet beards. Blitzkrieg deserves some credit, having your first game against a gender team is never easy, and they really hung in there. Bi-Polar Express is really coming along, and with a good chunk of the teams that gave them fits leaving the division, there’s nowhere to go but up. Add into the fact that Gordon added Cat Peters, who is a legit star, and the BPX roster looks better than ever. Their main question remains at QB, but he’s the first to tell you that. TMA shouldn’t fool you. I know that Week 1’s loss made it seem like things weren’t going to be good again, but the rumor is that TMA has a QB now! Reports indicate that he played very well at the wine tourney, AND they added Steph Czaja to the roster to really shore up the girls. TMA can trot out 4 amazing girls at any time, and if they figure out which ones to use and when? Look out. pAssless Chaps are back (after rumors that they were going to fold) and that means Coach Jay is ready to take them to the next step. They really got things together en route to the title game last season and they have to be considered among the favorites. Tater Tots are a new team that are run by Dave Marcus, who’s better known around the league (for now) as “Drunk Meg’s Boyfriend with the cool beard.” Shattered Dreams are bunch of fun loving dudes that apparently used to play on Sweet and Sour Inc. back in the day with Joe K and Gordon (per Topper). Joe K says they’re pretty awesome when I asked for some info, and he claimed he can “get them to have fun at the bar except for the curly headed one.” Graves Bros showed up to defeat TMA in their first game, so that’s a good sign there too. Last but not least, we have Zack Attack, who is run by Zack Elphick. Elphick was a star for GLBS last season, so there’s a decent chance he dominates the division. So far so good for the Attack, since they’re 1-0.

This Week’s Games:

The Replacements vs Blitzkrieg (+3) – I’m giving BK the points here only because if the Replacements are who I think they are, they’re a pretty good squad, where all I have to go on with Blitz is that they almost beat Bi-Polar. THE REPLACEMENTS BY 7

Zack Attack vs Tater Tots (+10) – The Tots get a shout out for showing up to the fields this week to practice even though their game was cancelled. It looks like they’re just starting out though, and in this case, I’m not sure they’ll figure out just how to stop Elphick. ZACK ATTACK BY 13

Wild Oak Beard Co (+6) vs The Bi-Polar Express – Let’s see how this new team fares against a gender squad. Like I said, Gordon and the Girls have been getting better with each session, and with a full team they should be able to keep the good time rolling. THE BI-POLAR EXPRESS BY 8

Shattered Dreams (+10) vs Zack Attack – I’m going with Zack Attack again mainly because I know who one person on that team is, and I’m not sure who any of the people are on Shattered Dreams just yet. ZACK ATTACK BY 7

Shattered Dreams (+10) vs TMA – The back end of a double header for Shattered Dreams brings them to TMA. Word is that the TMA QB will be there this week, and we’ll get to see how the division is going to unpack for them when he’s there. TMA BY 7

pAssless Chaps vs Graves Bros (EVEN) – I know that the Chaps were very good at the end of the last season, but Graves Bros looks REALLY good in their win over TMA last week. Since the Chaps (and Coach Jay) may need to shake off some rust, I feel this game may be very close. PASSLESS CHAPS BY 1

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

1.      Who will emerge as the standout NEW team to the TSL? There’s a lot of new names and faces around the league, and when that happens we get a LOT of new TSL stars out of it. Get out there and make some friends! Put the Social back in Social Co-Ed Football!

2.      Why are A&A and Team Topper in D2 again? Both of those teams should be in D1. This “We’re sick of D1” thing is getting a little annoying. Get up there and perform. We should have 8 teams up there next session. A&A, Team Topper, and Peachy Platoon. (No Joey Batts, you’re staying.)

3.      How soon can we get these rivalry games going at 3:00? I think the interdivision games that would see Peachy Platoon take on All We Do Is Quinn, En Fuego taking on Matty’s Angels, and A&A taking on Public Enemy would be just fantastic.

4.      Do you want some publicity for your team? All you have to do is talk to me! Email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. . Seriously, give me a heads up on why YOU are going to win your division.

5.      What’s up with people in the league latching onto stars and demanding those two play together so they can get on better teams? I’m looking at the Rameer/Jay German and Mo/Dave Wilbern combos. Go start your own teams so you can’t get kicked off of it like we did in the old days.

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

1.      The podcast is back!! Joe K made good on his Spring session long promise and got us back in the podcast game. It’s not as polished as it used to be, but its awesome that it’s back. I got sick of people asking me about it.

2.      Shout out to my new favorite pen pal, Josh Thompson of Peachy Platoon. He sent me just an awesome email about his team before the season started, letting me know who they added and what they were thinking heading into the league. He’s a well-spoken, nice guy, and he’s somebody that should DEFINITELY be a face of this league. Peachy is the future of the TSL kids.

3.      Seriously, Mountain Dew Me, Tater Tots, Zack Attack, Shattered Dreams, Wild Oak Beard Company, Graves Bros, Vaspian, The Replacements, Blitzkrieg and whoever else I don’t really know, email me! Let’s get some conversations going. Rep your team!

4.      I’m glad someone finally said what needed to be said: Gray is the absolute WORST choice for a team color and it should be outlawed.

5.      HOW ABOUT UNCLE TOPPER LADIES AND GENTLEMEN?!?! DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT I WASN’T GOING TO TALK ABOUT HOW THE AGELESS WONDER WALKED ONTO THE FIELD WITH NONE OF HIS ALL STAR CAST OF FEMALES AND DEMOLISHED WE BACK? NO INTERCEPTIONS AND IN COMPLETE CONTROL OF THE GAME.

6.      Shout out to the TSLers that are banding together to be a part of the 24-team Leonard T. Alba III Memorial TSL Fantasy Football Championship. It sounds like it’ll be a really fun time, and its just another example of how this league has really become a family.

7.      Here are my official picks for this season’s champions: D1: Marketing Mayors, D2: Peachy Platoon, D3: Frodo Swaggins, D4: Matty’s Angels, D5: En Fuego, D6: The Bi-Polar Express.

8.      I received a message from a player in Game On! during the offseason. I don’t want to put them on blast at all, but they said they were growing tired of that league because apparently the “Wanderers just keep winning all of the time and it isn’t fun.”. Well, I’d like to cordially invite the Wanderers to come up to the Rose Garden if they’re looking for some different competition. Hell, we could have a scrimmage this session if we wanted, right?

9.      And on that note, I’d like to personally send my condolences to Game On! and the rest of the WNY Social Co-Ed football community. During the offseason, Len Synor passed away unexpectedly. I was lucky enough to know Len when I lived in Buffalo and he was truly an awesome guy. So sad to see a good one leave us so soon.

10.   The word is that the bar is actually going to have specials for us this season. Apparently, they’ll toss an extra Truly in when we buy a bucket, among other things. Eyewitness reports suggest that’s a pretty smart deal for this league. Will it happen? I’m not one to talk. But let’s hope so.

And with that, let’s get to Week 2. Welcome once again to all of our new teams. Download the telegram app to talk with your TSL friends. Follow us on Facebook. Follow us on Twitter. Email me. Be a guest on the podcast. GET INVOLVED. Its so much better for everyone when you do.

Finals Wrap Up

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 05 July 2019 17:20

Published: Friday, 05 July 2019 17:20

Written by Patrick McGovern

Hits: 10989

And, with that, the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality has ended.

The smoke has cleared, the blood has been spilled, the alcohol has been finished and the patios have been closed off to us for reasons. Beneath it all, we had some amazing finishes and a few surprises along the way.

If you didn’t know who won yet, here are our Official Topper Sports League Spring 2019 Champions:

D1: Marketing Mayors

D2: Gryffindor

D3: Slytherin That End Zone

D4: Puckett All-Stars

D5: Cunning Stunts

D6: Practice Squad                

BREAKFAST CLUB: Schilling ‘Em Softly

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

Let’s take notice, however, of the complete lack of #1 seeds standing tall at the end of the day. Only ONE top seed in the divisions took home the championship, as Gryffindor stood tall in D2/C2 when they defeated Bullet Club. The #3 seeded Marketing Mayors became World Champions after taking the throne away from Public Enemy, breaking the win streak when it mattered the most. #2 seeded Slytherin That End Zone had a crazy double OT win last week, before running the gauntlet and beating Peachy Platoon AND All We Do Is Quinn in back to back games. It wasn’t an easy feat, but SITE are your D3/R1 champions and they EARNED it. The numbers didn’t lie: Puckett All-Stars were a MUCH better team than their #8 seed ranking. And they showed it, defeating the #1 seeded End Game, #3 seeded Uncle Rico’s and finally the #4 seeded Buffalo Solar Solutions in the D4/R2 title game. Great last few weeks for them, proving they’re very dangerous when the whole team shows up. The #2 seed Cunning Stunts met Matty’s Angels in the D5/R3 title game that ended the day and finally the Stunts defeated the Angels like they always knew they could. The last game for the entire session let us put our talented ladies on display for everyone, and it was a fitting end to everything. Finally, in D6/R4 #2 seeded Practice Squad never got to play Jabronies, because Coach Jay and the white hot pAssless Chaps made the finals instead. That’s awesome, and it makes me excited to see their progress come Fall 2019! Practice Squad played great football and took home a much deserved championship!

Congratulations are in order not only for the champions, but for everyone.

It’s not a secret that this league was turned upside down a few weeks before the season when we lost our Commissioner Lenny Alba. For a lot of groups, losing someone that means so much to their success can be devastating. But not the TSL. Within hours of the news of Lenny’s passing, the league and its members started coming together almost instantly to make sure that “The Show Must Go On”. Many league members started to step up and volunteer their time and services, and just about everyone in the league had reached out to Topper, Rameer, Joe K, Emily Curry, Val Bernal, anyone on Public Enemy, or whoever else that knew Lenny close to simply say “If there’s ANYTHING you need from us for this league, please let us know ASAP.”.

The hole left by the loss of Leonard T. Alba is immeasurable and no matter how many people stepped up to help the TSL out, we’d NEVER be able to fill that void.

But damnit, we tried.

This season was, from all accounts, fantastic. Save for one little bit of drama, things ran smoothly. General complaining was down 17%. People offering to referee was up 28%. Topper happiness went up 5.7%. Great numbers and metrics, quite frankly. But jokes aside, this was the season that you could SEE the members of the TSL constantly stepping up and taking ownership of their league. People were cleaning up garbage, people were helping with referees, people weren’t trashing the bar or the property. All of that matters.

Lenny used to tell me during our long weekly conversations that if he ever DID leave the TSL, he wasn’t sure which way the league would go. He was convinced (as only he can be) that once he was gone, the league would either become a lawless wasteland or everyone else would step up and keep each other honest. Of course he assumed “wild wild west” where people convince Drunk Uncle Topper to let them do whatever they wanted. But if the last 11 weeks have shown us anything, its that it’s becoming the latter.

The Topper Sports League has always been the best Co-Ed Social Football league in WNY because of the people. It’s not because we have the most competitive football, or because we play behind a bar. It’s that weekly “awesome family reunion” feeling that we all get as we descend upon the Rose Garden on Saturdays. We are there mostly to see each other and have some fun. Then, occasionally, we play some football for an hour. The relationships we’ve created from this league, for some of us, are life changing. The TSL family is so much more than football, and the more stories I hear of people who met in this league becoming intertwined with each other’s daily “regular” lives keep proving it. In this league, people consistently go from “person I played football against” to “friend that I need to text on a random Thursday to go get a drink and hang out”. People who don’t stay long after their games with the league, need to start, trust me. If you let this league accept you into its fabric, you’ll be rewarded with so many more awesome people in your life. This league gives back and its always accepting new members.

And that’s what Lenny always wanted.

He’s told me he loves that our league is great football, but he loves even more how it’s a living, breathing organism that proceeds to make us all family. He felt like the glue that held it all together, and in so many ways he truly was exactly that. As soon as we lost him, we all felt that glue missing, and that’s when everyone as a collective stepped up and kept this league chugging along. Every single one of you are the TSL, and we’re ALL the glue that holds this together. We have each other, and we proved that this season by banding together and keeping thing on track “for him”.

So, thank you.

Thank you to Topper for keeping this thing running smoothly.

Thank you to Rameer for busting his ass weekly to Referees lined up for us. Believe me, it’s a lot harder than you think it is.

Thank you to Val Bernal for taking all of our pictures.

Thank you to every single person that stepped up to ref a game, give some advice when it was needed for league matters, to our Universal Sub List people that played for teams in need, to the people who are writing articles for this website, to anyone that’s ever picked up some empty cans, to anyone who left their car and DIDN’T drive home drunk, to those that drove others home in that scenario, and thank you to just anyone that showed up, played, and left, but didn’t cause a ruckus in doing so.

Thank you, from me, to my informants from the league that have regularly called me or emailed me things that are going on with the TSL during the week. Thank you, to those that keep guessing that those same people are The Godfather. We have a running tally between the informants of who gets accused of being Me this season, and it’s fun to see them all get called out. When your main source of information passes away, I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to continue doing this article without him. Lots of people stepped up to make sure that I could, and I’d say it worked out pretty well.

Again, if you’re going to tell people in the league that we don’t talk about you enough, just email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. Let me know about your players and your team and who’s who. If you can’t go the extra mile to get yourself noticed, maybe you don’t deserve to be talked about?

Just a few last things here:

First off, THE WINE TOURNAMENT IS AUGUST 3^RD, 2019. It’s incredibly fun to hang out and drink wine all day while playing football in a very unique location. There’s only a few spots left for it so sign up now!!!

Secondly, AUGUST 17^TH is the current date for the start of the Fall 2019 season. While it may get bumped to the 24^th, and it isn’t set in stone, prepare as though we’re starting the 17^th. It’s a much quicker turnaround than usual, in an effort to not play our fall championships in the snow.

The first season of the “New Era” of the TSL is over. While the middle of March brought us to our lowest point, and for a moment, the future of this league felt uncertain and dim, this season has shown us that our future is brighter than ever. We have each other, we got through it together.

We’re only six weeks away from the next chapter in TSL history being written. I, for one, can’t wait to see how it’s going to unfold.

Be safe this summer. Until then, I’ll be in the cut.

Wait, no. I don’t even know where that is.

I’m always watching.

No, not that either.

That’s fine, I don’t need a catchy ending anyway. See you soon TSL Family. Take care of each other.