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The Godfathers Picks and thoughts for the Finals!!

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 16 November 2018 16:06
Published: Friday, 16 November 2018 16:06
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 4364



We started with 46 then went down to 39 and now we have 20 left. 20 dreams but only 5 trophies. D1, D3, D4 and D5 could be won by anyone. I still would be SHOCKED if anyone other than Peachy Platoon or Celino Sewer Rats made their way to the D6 finals. There are so many stories developing. Can Kyle Coniff bring an inspirational edge to a team that so desperately needs it tomorrow? Will Matty Ice and Gordon go toe to toe one more time? Will Joey Batts somehow someway shock D3 and beat A&A.? How pissed is Topper right now that once again he has a great look at the trophy but once again one of his studs will not be in the lineup? Will 3AS survive HK7 and Puckett all in one day? Why isn’t anyone talking about Ultimate Warriors or Hope N Ruin? How is ACE still in the finals?


OK let’s get this over with shall we………..







So what happens: There are some stories here to keep your eyes on. TEIM will get an emotional lift when Kyle Coniff makes his glorious return this week. But crappy weather and TEIM’s kryptonite on the other sideline does not bode well for them. I’m telling you if Turner wants to go down in history as an evil genius this would be the week to dust off Shari and trot her to the fields. MM vs ED is easily the best semi-final matchup of the day. I know the world thinks ED/PE II is right around the corner but how awesome of a story would it be if we got Marketing Mayors vs TEIM in the finals?  I just don’t see how MM can go guy vs guy with ED and I just can’t see TEIM holding on for 50 minutes against a team they are 0-4 against without their best player. DO NOT think for one second that PE will come to town looking ahead to ED and DO NOT think for one second that ED will come to town looking ahead to PE. I can’t predict the future but I can tell you this, the winner of this division will most definitely earn it.



A&A 5-1




So what happens: That’s a damn good question! You’re going to call me crazy but if Andrew Davis was in this week’s line up I would have called for the shock of the century and picked Team Topper but he won’t be so I am heading elsewhere. Bullet Club stacked the deck last session but they will have to earn it this session. They can start by moving their safeties up or they will get run over on the sidelines. Team Topper will be missing Davis so they could potentially get shredded over the middle this week. I still do not know what to think this week with A&A and the Gryff. Jeremy Burr is the best player in this division by a mile but can the Gryff go toe to toe with A&A? Every time Joey plays Matty, Matty wins and Joey gets depressed. I see that happening again. Back to back MVP is now off the table for Joey but he can get right back it the conversation if he upsets A&A and takes home the D3 title. I see the Club beating Team Topper as they catch a break with no Davis and A&A should outlast the Gryff. When the dust settles we should once again get the “Matty Ice and Gordon Freedom Festival.” I think when it’s all said and done A&A beats Bullet Club like 31-27.





HK7  11-1


So what happens: Puckett All Stars look poised to hoist the D4 trophy by days end. 3AS vs HK7 should be a barn burner. So what was up with the HK7 QB last week? He got a tad weird as he was heard yelling at his players so much so one walked off the field and grabbed his keys but later returned. HK7 vs 3AS should be the “blonde battle of the century.” Oh yes Emily and Katie Keller will all be “sugar and spice and everything nice” but don’t let them fool you as they aren’t fooling me these 2 are coming for blood this week. And what of the 40YPG? Will 40ypg be “40 Year Swag Guy” as he could pull something magical (like a twist tie) out of his bag to help propel 3AS to victory. OMG how awesome would it be if 40YPG proposed to Katie Keller at half time of their game with HK7? 3AS has been getting hot down the stretch. No one is talking of about the reigning and defending champs Ultimate Warriors just like last time but this time the teams left are way better than last session. PAS should get by UW as they just are too fast. HK7 vs 3AS should be a barn burner. I like the fun stories so I am taking 3AS in the first game as they are built for the mud. The only problem is 3AS has a kryptonite and that is Puckett All Stars. So I’m guessing Puckett All Stars 38 3AS 27.





ACE 25-1

So what happens: No one took Hope N Ruin cereal now look where we are.  AWDIQ knows better than anyone that they have their best shot yet at the D5 title. Also know that, to themselves, they are hoping and praying they do not see HOPE N RUIN in the finals. Guess what? AWDIQ will be seeing HNR in the finals. I love the Witter’s story. While everyone was buying the Matty’s Angels hype and trust me it was all hype Zach Newberry sat back quietly and waited to pounce. And boy did he ever pounce as he made good on his promise to dust up the Angels. I honestly do not even know how ACE is still standing in this thing. It must be a testament to one of the greatest leaders of modern times in Ronny K. I would love to see HNR shock AWDIQ one more time as it would not only destroy AWDIQ emotionally but it would also cement HNR’s legacy as one of the most resilient teams in TSL History. By days end I think AWDIQ will make good on their attempt to finally win one from Hope N Ruin. AWDIQ beats HNR 29 to 23.





JABRONIES 1,000,000-1


So what happens: Peachy Platoon will be facing CSR for the XD6 title and there really isn’t anything anyone can do to stop that. They were the 2 best teams all session and nothing has changed and nothing will change. The only question si who will win. I say Peachy platoon will carry in this one as they just look too good. Jabronies are a great story but let’s be honest B’s Brother has a better chance of getting a job next week than the Jabronies do of winning tomorrow. TEZ will not do much better as they too will struggle to score against a team that is light years ahead of them. CSR and PP should be a decent battle. Both have size speed and can score almost at will. The weather should play intot his game but by dayus end I think PP has to many weapons. Peachy Platoon 36 CSR 30.




- So with Davis out will Drew take over once and for all? There will be a lot of pressure on him to help Team Topper carry the day but is he ready for that pressure?

-Don’t forget Friday January 11, 2019 Adam’s Mark Hotel it’s going to be banquet time. YAAAAAAAY

-I hope the refs have a better day tomorrow than last week. I have been a getting a fair amount of “unfavorable reports” about last week on a few fields.

-Can Zach Newberry “evil genius it up” one more time and shock AWDIQ? If he does it would be one of the greatest upsets in league history.

-This playoff and league is not the same without the Bambs. Parrish, Yacos et al WTF lets figure out what the heck has you guys all mad at each other and get you guys back where you belong. No one chokes in the playoffs better than the Bambs and I miss them.

-How happy is Garrett Beesing to once again be playing in the games that matter right now? His jump to The Club looks to be making a lot of sense right now.

-I really hope when everyone hits the fields tomorrow that 6 card board cut out Dave Bakers overtake Field #1 and help TEIM in their fight with Public Enemy. It will be nice to see Kyle Coniff back if the rumors are true.



5 Questions for Saturday

1. How will the weather affect the QB’s? It’s not looking good and we want the season over so unless we get a hail storm we are playing tomorrow.

2.  What must Joey Batts be thinking? With B2B MVP pretty much a thing of the past as both Cintas and Cunning Stuns lost what else does Joey Batts have left? He could beat his bitter rival Matty Ice but everyone knows Matty Ice has had Joey Batts number for a while now. Even if the Gryff wins Tony not Joey would get all the accolades. For the first time in his career Joey Batts is coming to town with no possible way of winning any of the storylines.

3. So what makes you cringe more… The thought of Public Enemy playing Eyes Downtown one more time? Or the thought of Matty Ice and Gordon playing one more time?

4. How is ACE still alive in the playoffs? No seriously can someone tell me how?

5. Can AWDIQ finally get the monkey off their backs and beat Hope n Ruin? Easier said than done…..

The Playoffs: Thoughts, Picks, and stuff

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Thursday, 08 November 2018 19:17
Published: Thursday, 08 November 2018 19:17
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 4175


November 10th in the year of our Lord 2018. Remember the day for it is all about to begin again. On this day (39) teams from all walks of life, each with a different story to tell, will invade the Angry Buffalo looking for the holy grail of social co ed football. There is no bigger trophy in this business than a TSL trophy. Don’t let the others fool you the best teams play here PERIOD!

What stories are about to unfold? Joe K did a great job stacking the deck last session but now that the TSL has taken away his “security blanket” how will the Club fare this time having to win it all the ole’ fashioned way? What must Topper be thinking this time around? This might be his best look yet at a D3 title as his team is loaded. Can Topper shake the “bad weather” QB stereotype once and for all and will his team to greatness?  Will we get our “girl power” final once and for all? If we do will the personalities of the (2) QBs get in the way of perhaps the greatest battle in recent memory? And while we are on the subject am I the only one that remembers right now the reigning and DEFENDING D5 champion is a team called Hope n Ruin?  Can anyone stop Puckett All Stars? Will 3rd and Schlong make good on their promise to run over D4 on their way to their “date with destiny” and Bullet Club in D3 next session? Are Peachy Platoon and Celino Sewer Rats destined to have at it one more time or from the ashes will Practice Squad or The McKenzie Agency crash the party? And what of the fiercest and most bitter rivalry of them all? Are Eyes Downtown and Public Enemy destined to clash on the grandest of stages for all the marbles one more time? At which point in this rivalry will each and every member of each team realize that the Yankees need the Red Sox, Ohio State needs Michigan, Auburn needs Alabama, Don Bosco Prep needs Bergen Catholic. Whether they want to admit it or not Eyes Downtown and Public Enemy need each other more than they know. In a year, maybe 2 maybe 5 both teams will look back and realize right here and right now they are embroiled in the greatest rivalry in TSL History. While we are on the subject there is a team in light blue jerseys that are former D1 champions and they sit quietly waiting in the weeds to strike, how come no is talking about them, they should be! And lastly what of our greatest TSLer of them all. Joseph Batts sits quietly alone reading this knowing the greatest truth of them all, Joey Batts is facing his mortality as he enters the playoffs as the only man in history with a shot at back to back TSL MVP. Can he make history and achieve an impossible dream?

What happens next? Where do we go from here? What new star is ready to emerge? In 2 weeks when the dust settles (5) more teams will enter the hall of greatness and social co-ed football immortality as they will be able to call themselves TSL CHAMPIONS…….



HOOTIE AND THE BROFISH VS TIGHT ENDS IN MOTION+8: I really wish both of these squads were at 100% this rivalry could have ended in a great way this Saturday. These squads are both very good and both teams deserve to be in D1 and in the title chase. TEIM is loaded with skill all over the field. HATBF have made a seamless transition to the D1 game. All things being equal I think TEIM would have brought it this week but playing without both Kyle and Tiger will be too much to ask. HATBF have speed and they have a skyscraper that will run wild on the TEIM secondary this week. HOOTIE AND THE BROFISH BY 10

MARKETING MAYORS VS RACKS AND SACKS+8: I find myself watching RAS play and walking away thinking that they know what they are doing wrong but for some reason they will not fix their problems. You can say ABC aren’t working but until you fix them what are you doing? MM are a solid franchise that check all the boxes. They have one of the best players in league history, they have a solid QB, they have a savvy vet in Kevin Zak an offensive genius in Corey Turner and a solid female stable. RAS has some size and they have some speed but I have just not seen enough from them to call an upset of any kind MM should roll easily in this one.  MARKETING MAYORS BY 7

#XTC+13 VS EYES DOWNTOWN:  ED is a tough team to beat to do so you must play safe, smart mistake free football and hope and pray they make a mistake before you do. #XTC does not have the club in the bag to do this for a full 50 minutes against this team. XTC has some size and they have some speed and they have good girls but I just don’t see them going toe to toe and punch for punch with a team of this magnitude. You can not and will not beat ED by zoning them. XTC learned this lesson is last season’s playoff let’s see if they learned from their mistake or are they destined to make the same mistake again? For XTC to even have a chance they must listen to Tommy Hughes as he is the only one that can think them through this. No matter what I just think ED is just too good for XTC. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 11



STICKY BANDITS +7 VS 1 TOPPER TOO MANY: Bad weather check. Team that has been upset in the playoffs before check. With a cardboard cutout nation behind them Sticky Bandits will take the field of battle this Saturday trying to make history. Across the field from them awaits their bitter rival Topper. He is Sticky Bandit kryptonite as for some peculiar reason the Topper never loses to the Sticky Nation. The time for talk is over. Team Topper has been a D3 mainstay for some time. They have a solid team top to bottom and might not get a better look at the title than in this playoff. If they once again fail to achieve their goal it might be time to consider breaking up and splitting into 4 parts North, South, East and West. These teams match up quite well. I think the key to this game will be at the female position and with the return of Kelly Liddle I think Team Topper’s time could finally be now. It’s time for each and every member of Team Topper to just look into the mirror and ask themselves this question, “Am I good enough to call myself a champion.” We will get our answer within 2 weeks…..or less. TEAM TOPPER BY 3

GRYFFINDOR VS SLYTHERIN THAT END ZONE +7: Well well well. It is almost time to see if signing Jeremy Burr was worth it. Will Burr throw the Gryff on his back and take them to the promise land? Great players come to play in the greatest of games. This QB thing has me confused. I mean Joey Batts is a league icon and I so want him to win back to back MVP but is the Gryff better or worse with Tony at QB this week? I know they are worse as Joey will take them to the promise land. I’m sorry for even insulting anyone’s intelligence by even asking that question it was dumb, my bad.  You know it, I know it and the world knows it. As for the game, SITE has taken the next step but to be honest all friggin 10 of them could try and cover Burr and he still would get wide open. SITE’s day is coming but that day is not Saturday.  GRYFFINDOR BY 4 IF TONY PLAYS QB GRYFFINDOR BY 24 IF JOEY BATTS PLAYS QB

DMX+1 VS BULLET CLUB: This one should be good. Yes DMX beat up on Bullet Club but its playoffs so don’t worry we will see Travis and Zach oh wait no we won’t. The Club will have to circle the wagons and do it the old fashioned way this go round. DMX is good but they got SmOaKeD by Tony and the Gryff last week. For BC to win they need to tighten their zone up as they are the only ones that don’t know that their safeties play waaaaay too deep. Jeff Easton is the wild card in this game. He has the potential to be so very good. His potential is limitless but he doesn’t know that yet. In time, he will take this league over and toy with teams like DMX. For some reason that day has not come yet, but it will. This game should be good between 2 teams that are both solid and looking to find a way to get to round #2.   BULLET CLUB BY 3

A&A VS MORNING WOOD +6: I do not know what to think right now. Morning Wood has the potential to be really good but I have not seen it. They have a great QB, one of the best WRs in the game let alone the league (obviously I mean Mo and not Dave, April fools I totally meant Dave) and I am hearing rumors Rachel Parker is coming back for payoffs. A&A is vet savvy and battel tested. They have won titles and they will flat out bring it this week. If you want to see one of the best games of the day look no further than this one. I expect 80 points and a good old fashioned slug fest. A&A BY 7



3RD AND SCHLONG VS CINTAS +10:  3AS are the people’s champions. They have everything you want in a team. Heck they even have their own hats now. 3AS has been white hot down the stretch as they look tough to beat. Cintas are made for the mud and have the greatest TSLer of them all but I just don’t see them taking this game. Cintas will struggle to cover Katie Keller and I just don’t see them winning a slugfest with 3AS. 3AS better start thinking right now about a plan B as each and every team they face will be looking to shut down Katie Keller which means they might want to start thinking about a backup plan. 3RD AND SCHLONG BY 4

HK7 VS STEVE’S CUZ’INS +10: Cousin Steve has had an up and down season to date. The good news is his offense finished well. The bad news is HK7 is up next. HK7 is loaded for a title run. They are an offensive juggernaut. If this game turns into a track meet there is no way the Cousins keep up with HK7. HK7 is very balanced and have few holes. I like their QB as he plays a very smart very methodical game. HK7 has won their last 3 and at least to me seem to be the only team that can go toe to toe with Puckett All Stars. HK7 will not have an easy road to Puckett but at least this week I do not see much of a fight heading their way.  HK7 BY 8

BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS VS ULTIMATE WARRIORS: They tried to settle this thing last week but the football Gods were having none of it so they made them play again. These squads went toe to toe for 50 minutes yet when the dust settled the score was 30-30 and we did not get a winner. Don’t worry boys and girls no matter what, someone will win this game Saturday. BSS is hot and they are doing well especially on offense. UW are still your reigning and defending D4 champs but they have been quite inconsistent. If they play like last session’s D4 playoffs they could win again. But if they play that bombs away sh*t show game they played when they lost like 3 in a row they will be exiting early. BSS never really does any damage when the chips are down but for some weird reason that I can’t explain I just think they are due so I am taking them this go round. BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS BY 4

INDECENT EXPOSURE +8 VS PUCKETT ALL STARS: It seemed like just yesterday that IE was the team holding the trophy but since then they have regressed. They just seem to be one player away from truly doing some damage. They are balanced and have smart savvy players that have all played in the big games. PAS are rolling these days with their bombs away offense. Yes they are fast and yes they can go but the weather is crappy and that favors the balanced squad. I am not calling the upset by any means but IE matches up quite well with PAS. One break early or a bad throw or bounce could mean a game that is way closer than one would think.  PUCKETT ALL STARS BY 8




HOPE N RUIN+6 VS CUNNING STUNTS: 39-36 that’s the only score that should matter. That score should be in the back of the head of each and every Cunning Stunt player. That score should also remind you that if you don’t bring 110% every play, every minute, nay every second of every game by days end you will lose and you will need to spend the entire off season wondering how it all went wrong. The world wants nay needs Matty’s Angles vs Cunning Stunts. For that to happen CS MUST win this game. They will not win this game if they let their guard down for even 1 second. Hope N Ruin this very second is the best team in D5. Believe that Jack as it is the truth until someone comes along and shows us otherwise. The girl power story is great and yes the world is cheering but Cunning Stunts must give the world something to cheer for. On November 10th in the year of our Lord 2018 Cunning Stunts and Hope n Ruin go at it one last time. 39-36 don’t forget Cunning Stunts 39-36 it happened once it can happen again. Only you can stop it…..  or can you?  XXXXXXXXXXXXX by 1

MATTY’S ANGELS VS WITTER’S +7: Well the good news is Witter’s gave MA a game last time out. The bad news for them is Katie Salisbury did not play in that game but girl is ready to go and she will bring hell, fire and brimstone with her this week. Witter’s better get ready for war as MA looks like an offensive juggernaut. They aren’t even going to attack the #2 Witter’s girl they are coming for each and every Witter’s DB. I keep sitting here at my keyboard telling people that common sense would tell you a taller male WR in theory can catch a ball over a girl safety that is generally 6-8 inches shorter. For some reason each and every team in D5 refuses to listen to me. Maybe someday someone will listen..maybe…. someday. MATTY’S ANGELS BY 8

ACE +3 VS HUNG BUFFALO: ACE has done the impossible and backed into the #5 seed of the D5 playoffs. Fun fact ACE beat HB earlier in the year. ACE has skill and they have won some big games in this league but can they do the impossible and make some noise in the D5 playoffs? Well as long as they are not facing a gender team that might be possible. HB is one of the few teams in D5 that just show up and play a solid mistake free football game. They aren’t pretty but they just go out and make plays. I expect a close game here between 2 teams that are very chippy but match up quite well.   HUNG BUFFALO BY 6

ALL WE DO IS QUINN VS UFO +13: The good news for UFO is they are in the D5 dance.  They also won 2 of their last 3 games and this is a good thing. They have played some solid football and have improved greatly from last season. Now for the bad news. AWDIQ is 7-1 and have looked like a terror all season. They also beat UFO 37-0 a few weeks ago. All things being equal I just don’t see UFO going punch for punch with this team. AWDIQ is faster and younger and that should translate into a big victory. UFO will not win this game but look to have taken the next step hopefully they continue on in their development and slowly work their way up the D5 ladder next session.  ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 8




TIGHT END ZONES +8 VS THE MCKENZIE AGENCY: As I started to write this I said “OK TEZ can’t score and lead with that” then I saw something. TEZ has scored 191 points while TMA has scored 181 points. TEZ probably doesn’t win this game. TMA is battle tested and they have solid leadership. They probably won’t need their offense this week but if they do not start scoring some points they will exit quickly in round #2. TMA has a decent defense and they should be able to suffocate an average offense at best from TEZ. I keep seeing crappy weather and mud and muck and keep thinking it’s time to start throwing Ron Webber some footballs. THE MCKENZIE AGENCY BY 10

THE BIPOLAR EXPPRESS+14 VS CELINO SEWER RATS: It was so nice that BPE finally had a chance to feel the joy of winning a football game. Their super bowl was last week as they shocked TEZ and the world in a big 37-35 victory. It appears to me that Dorothy is not in Kansas anymore. CSR are coming to the fields for two reasons and two reasons only. They want Peachy Platoon and the D6 title. Anything less than them taking home the title is not acceptable. CSR has size, speed and they can take their game to great levels. There is no doubt in my mind that in time BPE will rival Matty’s Angels and Cunning Stunts. Their day is coming but that day is not today or Saturday.  Before you make an omelette you must first crack a few eggs.  CELINO SEWER RATS BY 13

PRACTICE SQUAD +7 VS PEACHY PLATOON:  I was expecting this game but not in round #1. TPS is a solid football team that can win the title. If they don’t show up they will get crushed Saturday and their season will be over. PP has looked awesome to date. They are wicked fast and have made a lot of noise this season. They have everything clicking right now. TPS has a great team too though they don’t have the speed PP has. Once again for TPS to have any chance at all they must get each and every one of their players to the fields. If they are missing folks again it will be a long day at the office. But if all their players show expect an instant classic. PEACHY PLATOON BY 4

PASSLESS CHAPS VS JABRONIES: This one should be interesting between 2 teams that finally made the playoffs. PC had a scary season #1 in TSL while Jabronies lost on the last play in last sessions regular season and missed the playoffs. This game could be good. Neither team has vet savvy both are young and neither is favored over the other. Both teams need to improve on a lot of things but they are in the playoffs and that’s all that matters right now.  In games like this I play the “legends card”. The Chaps have really really really really really really tall guy but he doesn’t show up all the time. Jabronies have Caleb and Caleb is a legend so for this reason I am taking Jabronies on the last play. JABRONIES BY 1


5 Questions for Saturday

1. If anyone in the TSL universe can update me on the status of Bocc’s Audi it would be greatly appreciated. I still can NOT believe Travis threw his speaker in Bocc’s Audi without bubble wrap or any protection of any kind. I’m sorry this is (5) questions so here is my question….WHY TRAVIS? WHY?

2. When the dust settles and we look back on this season and this playoff will the memory we remember most be made by a man or will that play be made by a woman? Time will tell…

3. Why isn’t anyone talking about Marketing Mayors right now? I know PE/ED stole the headlines last week with Thug Gate but D1 better not sleep on this team. They still have one of the best players in the history of the game on their side. I for one can not wait to see what this team does when Delecki makes his triumphant return. It still is a testament to how good they are that even without Delecki they are still in the title hunt.  There is no doubt in my mind that the Mayors can take home this sessions title.

4. Will Gordon hold and not implode one more time? So far Gordon is 7 for 7. He has made good on his promise to make “football fun again.” He now enters the main stage as BPE takes on CSR this time for real. How will Gordon fare if a call does not go his way early? Will he implode or will he settle things down and be the architect of the greatest upset in TSL history? As I think about BPE vs CSR I can’t help but think of the 1980 USA Hockey Gold Medal Team. What must they have been thinking in round #1 of that playoff. The fear and pressure must have been un-bearable.

5.  What must Brian Ferger be thinking right now? TMA has a great look at the title this session as Ferger and Co are coming to town with their best team ever. Yes PP and CSR are loaded but TMA is as well. Will Ferger be able to channel some inspiration and lead an offense that needs him to the promise land? I will let you in on a secret TMA can win the D6 title but it all begins and ends on offense which means it all begins and ends at QB. Godspeed McKenzie Agency. #releasetheWebber


10 Final Thoughts for Saturday

1. The game I have my eye on is in D4 where BSS and Ultimate Warriors get to finally settle the score. Last time out they played to a 30-30 draw. This time there will be no tie, there will be a winner one way or another. We will play all night if we have to until we get a winner. Both squads are solid on both sides of the ball so I expect a solid game here. Let us not forget even though the name has changed UW are still your reigning and defending D4 champions.

2. There is a man among us who will be taking all week to determine the solution to the moral dilemma put in front of him. That man’s name is Joey Batts and he easily is our greatest player. Will he let his younger brother Tony play QB this week for Gryffindor? Last week Tony just threw it all over as Gryffindor cruised. What if Tony plays and he wins big and then he not Joey leads Gryff to the promise land? Will Joey win back to back MVP as it never has and possible never will be done ever again.? What if Joey lets Tony play and Tony falls flat on his face? There are too many questions and not enough answers right now. I can’t wait to see who is throwing for the Gryff this Saturday. What a dilemma indeed……

3.  If I was a member of Team Topper I would quietly, to myself, be wondering what I have to do to get a break. They have been a very solid football team for a bunch of seasons now but for some reason they keep losing in the playoffs. They have everything you could ask for. They have good guys, they have solid girls, they have tremendous leadership, they have been a part of the some of the biggest games in history. Yet they keep falling short. Will this be their time? Will they finally answer the bell and will themselves to social co ed football immortality? For those of you wondering it is supposed to be 36 degrees with a 40% chance of precipitation. I am not one to quietly suggest things or play head games or even subconsciously suggest there is a problem but to me that report would be considered “bad weather.”

4. Speaking of pressure let’s talk about Bullet Club too. This time last year The Club with a “very questionable roster” entered the field of battle and took home the D3 title. Now they sit in the #5 hole of the D3 playoffs. To make matters worse they must now face DMX a team that beat them 54-36 in week #6. With 3rd and Schlong calling them out and not getting answers and DMX a team that beat them up pretty good heading their way Bullet Club has to be feeling the pressure.  

5. I know the world wants Matty’s Angels vs Cunning Stunts as it would be one of the greatest playoff games in history but how funny would it be if Hope n Ruin just crashed the party and pulled the upset again? Let us not forget no one and I mean NO ONE gave them a chance in hell last playoff and they took home the D5 title. They absolutely could find lighting in a bottle one more time. With Joey Batts already facing a moral dilemma with his Gryffindor team this week could his heart not be in this game?

6.  I am sure there was a time the players in blue and yellow might have thought their season was over. Then about 3 weeks ago something magical happened Cardboard Cutout Dave Baker and the Dave Baker nation appeared. Since that moment Sticky Bandits are 1-1-1 and they could not be in a better place right now as they face a Team Topper that does not have much playoff luck. This time last playoff Drew was MIA there is no doubt in my mind that Drew will come to town with a chip on his shoulder as he knows better than anyone that he must deliver. BTW Ricky Recckio used to be really good when is he going to take a game over and shock the world?

7. I keep looking at that Practice Squad/Peachy Platoon game and keep thinking that a close game is brewing. PP has looked awesome but TPS has not been anywhere close to 100% most of the season. Well if they were waiting for playoffs to shock the world the time is now. PP is so fast and so very talented this test will be a tough one. The winner of this game could be your D6 title winner.   

8.  We will know by Friday but it is looking like the banquet will be January 11th at the Adams Mark Hotel. If there is one time you won’t want to miss it is always this night as this is the Super Bowl of the TSL season. There is no better time in this league than this night. Expect the unexpected.

9.  One of 2 things is going to happen Saturday either Eyes Downtown is going to beat #XTC by 40 or the Eyes Downtown QB is going to be on tilt and narrowly walk away with a late victory. Tommy Hughes is an evil genius and good at head games don’t think for one minute he won’t try to exploit the ED QB who is on tilt these days to help his team achieve victory.

10. Ladies and Gentlemen as we all prepare to take the field of battle this week let me be the first to remind each and every one of you that you are adults and as Chris Cole put it “We are playing co-ed tag football behind a bar.” This is not the super bowl and no matter if you win or lose this week or next the sun will come up tomorrow. I wish everyone the best of luck. We will make sure each and every official makes sure they give their very best to do the best job they can. Shockingly and please let me apologize but we do not have instant replay or that technology quite yet. Calls will be missed and sometimes things will not go your way. Try your best, give your best and be your best.

Week 8 thoughts, a couple picks, some simple reading

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Thursday, 25 October 2018 16:15
Published: Thursday, 25 October 2018 16:15
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 4073


It’s going to rain which means more football might get cancelled. I also feel awful which means I am only going to handicap one game per division. I am hearing the weather will become a big issue over the next few weeks. If we make it to 2:00 Matty’s Angels vs Cunning Stunts is looming. The day starts awesome and ends awesome assuming we make it all the way through…..


Where do we go from here? What happens next? Let’s find out shall we……..


DIVISION #1 Game of the Day

PUBLIC ENEMY 6-0 +1 VS EYES DOWNTOWN 4-1: For all intents and purposes this is the game of the season between the (2) best teams in the game today. The weather could be a big factor in this game. PE is dialed in these days as their offense is just rolling teams over at a clip at about 38 a game. Ryan Radke looks to be pretty much un-coverable most days. ED has had PE’s number the last few games mostly due to the fact that they have won the #3 vs #3 battle and quite frankly their QB has made the throws when needed. The girls on both squads pretty much cancel each other out. Both teams have stars all over the field. The questions is, was and will always be this….Who will win the battle between the teams #3s and which QB will blink first? I’m guessing Pauly J will be coming to town with a big chip on his shoulder after being TOTALLY underutilized in last sessions semi-finals between these (2).     I PREDICT A TIE


DIVISION #3 Game of the Day

BULLET CLUB 4-3 +3 VS GRYFFINDOR 5-2: Joe K has won the battle most seasons and is living rent free inside Joey Batts head. Joey Batts is struggling emotionally right now. No one knows more than I the pain the man is feeling after his huge loss to Matty Ice this week. Joey Batts knows Stunts vs Angels is more than a game it’s a battle of will between 2 of the games biggest stars both on and off the field. As for the game, the weather favors BC. Gryffindor must play smart and attack the sidelines as BC plays their safeties way too deep and can get beat on the lines at about 8-10 yards. JJ is good will BC hide “glasses” on the PR line or will they send him out to cover one of D3 bests girls? And for the love of God will Tony finally come to play this week or will he once again just show up and mail it in? I fear Joey Batts will have the Angels on his mind and will once again be wondering what “could have been” by days end.   BULLET CLUB BY 3


DIVISION #4 Game of the Day

HK7 4-2 VS 3RD AND SCHLONG 3-3 +4: I still don’t know what to think about this game. HK7 has looked absolutely dialed in against UW and IE but were shocked a few weeks ago against NPI. 3AS looked to be starting a run but then the weather struck last week. Both squads have solid offenses and both boast (2) of the best females in the division. I fear the sloppy track will force 3AS to change their game plan up. There is no doubt in my mind that HK7 will make it a point to take Katie Keller out of this game. There is also no doubt in my mind that 3AS will make it a point to take Emily Schilling out of the game. What does that mean? Yes, it means total anarchy. It means dogs and cats living together. It also means that the “other” girls on both squads will need to show up and earn their paychecks this week as they are the key to this game. For 3AS to have chance they will all need to eat their spinach this week and I would recommend that they all bring elastic workout ropes as anything could help.  HK7 BY 3


DIVISION #5 Game of the Day

MATTY’S ANGELS 5-1 VS CUNING STUNTS 4-2 +6: Joey Batts as league back to back MVP is such a wonderful story. Sometimes in life we don’t get our happy ending. We can dare to dream but ultimately we don’t get what we want. The world wants the happy ending but I fear sadness, misery and despair is heading our way. This game is so great for so many reasons. I for one am happy that a team with 5 women and 1 male can literally show up most weeks and make their opponents look silly. This is impressive as each and every female player on each team should be commended as 7-10 years ago the thought of a competitive “all girls team” was nothing more than a pipe dream. But we are now on the main stage talking about a 4-2 team and a 5-1 team heading straight for each other. As for the game, whether people want to believe it or not I think CS is starting to slowly becoming the good guys and MA are starting to become the bad guys. I keep hearing people say that MA as good as they are just have an “arrogance“ about them that is not winning this league over. CS on the other hand seem to be slowly winning the masses over. To be honest, perception really matters not in football. The truth of the matter is once you take way the pop and the circumstance and gravity of the moment at hand, Matty’s Angels is just a better football team than Cunning Stunts and WILL win this football game. Santa Claus will be showing up on October 27 instead of December 25 and he is bringing Katie Salisbury back to the Angels. Unfortunately it looks like Santa will be bringing Joey Batts coal    MATTY’S ANGELS BY 7




DIVISION #6 Game of the Day

THE MCKENZIE AGENCY 4-2 +7 VS CELINO SEWER RATS 5-1: CSR have won some big games this season and appear to be the one team that can stand up to PP. TMA are a solid bunch of vet players. They have size, speed and are skilled. Can they gel in time to make some noise in the D6 playoffs? It looks like we will see this week. If they can stand toe to toe with CSR they can make noise in the playoffs. If CSR runs them off the field then they will probably make it to the semis then fall short. CSR has a size edge but TMA has playmakers all over the field. Sloppy tracks mean “mudders” become important. There is no better mudder out there than Ron Weber. Dude just shows up and make splays. He will get you 7-8 yards in a hail storm or on a 90 degree day.  CELINO SEWER RATS BY 7


3 Questions for Saturday

1. Will the weather hold? I’m guessing no as it appears all reports claim we are in for a ton of rain Saturday.

2. What the heck is going on with Morning Wood? They started the season as the D3 dark horse but literally have been run over the past month as they seem to be imploding. What is going on and more importantly where the heck is their QB? Team Topper is up next and Team Topper is not a good “bad weather” football team.

3. Are Cintas and Joey Batts heading for an ugly break up? It seems like the Stunts are double booked with Cintas again. Cintas don’t seem to be listening to the Batman. It just seems like both heading in other directions next season is the best move for both.


10 Final Thoughts for Saturday

1. Dress warm bring rain gear prepare for the heavan’s to pour down on each and every one of us.

2. If you are an ACE fan their season is literally on the line this week. Their dim playoff hopes still are alive but they MUST beat Witter’s this week. This will be no easy feat as Witter’s has been playing decent ball these days. With HNR getting hot and VI still looming this really is ACE’s last shot. If they lose they could be done like dinner.

3.  I am curious to see how the Ultimate Warriors match up with the Puckett All Stars. PAS are killing it on offense but like to go long a lot and the sloppy track this week could slow them down. UW are generally in low scoring type of games so this one could be interesting.

4. I will continue to keep my eyes on Hope N Ruin as they sit at 2-4 but they have won their last in dramatic fashion. This week they have (2) against UFO and Hung Buffalo. Its hard to think they looked lost a few weeks ago but if they win these 2 games they could be the team you want NO PART OF in the playoffs.

5. Sticky Bandits looked lost a few weeks ago but now behind the power of “cardboard cut out” Dave Baker Nation they could be .500 by days end. Cobblestone is up next and they have been a hot mess all session. Sticky could be looking at a big victory this week.

6. Tight End Zones could be in store for a very long day as they have 2 big tests with Peachy Platoon and The Practice Squad. It’s funny how in just one week things can go from so good to so bad so quickly.

7. Vandalay Industries is up against it this week. They are sitting at 2-4 but 2 huge tests with Cunning Stunts and AWDIQ are looming. Topper is not good in the bad weather and VI needs to take 1 of these games or they could be in trouble as they are hanging onto a playoff spot by a thread.

8. HATBF got beat up pretty bad last week by Marketing Mayors last week. I am curious to see how they counter punch this week after seeing what MM had. I see skill on the HATBF side of the field but I do not see much technical knowledge or discipline. Now that they have seen what MM has I am curious to see how they react and change their game plan this week.

9. Steve’s Cuz’ins better get their games in quickly. They have only played 4 games and they have 5 to go but there are only 2 weeks left. They play 2 this week assuming the weather holds. I’m not good at math but it looks like they will not get them all in.

10. As crazy as it sounds DMX could still end up with the #1 seed by seasons end. They have a very winnable game with SITE coming up. Team Topper has a big game with Morning Wood and the Gryff has to play BC which has had their number for some time now. DMX could easily be the D3 dark horse right now as they seem to be getting hot at the right time.

Week 9 Thoughts, questions, and playoff questions..

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Thursday, 01 November 2018 13:28
Published: Thursday, 01 November 2018 13:28
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 4160


“Don’t waste your time trying to get in my head.  There’s nothing there…..”

Denny Crane


Enter Week #9 or is it #8. It’s November and that means the playoffs are quickly approaching. I am not exactly sure how this is all going to end. The weather sucks and no official word has been determined though I am hearing we are just going to play this week out then go right to the playoffs as the weather continues to be a bear. I am not sure which games are scheduled and what is being made up so I am just taking this time to go over what is at stake this week and where we are heading as the chase for Social Co-ed Football Immortality is about to begin…..are you ready?


DIVISION #1 What’s at stake this week?

To be honest alot is at stake this week. The #1 seed is usually what everyone is playing for as the #2 seed has to draw Marketing Mayors “theoretically” in round #2 and no one wants that. PE and ED God willing will finally have at it for all the marbles. If PE wins they take the #1 seed no matter what. If ED wins they will need to take that game and come back down from 14-0 to RAS to take the #1 seed. ED is as good as it gets so this is absolutely possible. I am hearing things these days…. For one where is Bro? If he is not playing QB down the stretch HATBF is done like dinner. The MM vs TEIM game is big if you ask me. TEIM is reeling right now as injuries have struck. If they lose to MM they could drop to the #4 seed which is a place where I do not think they want to be at seasons end.  RAS seems to have kicked their game up a nickel and could be a very interesting first round matchup for some teams. They still have a battle tested Dave Chelus at QB who has the arm to get it through the muck in November. I still wonder if AB even fields a team heading into the playoffs. Disaster and questionable player management has killed this squad. I feel bad for Coach Jay who has valiantly played through this mess as he has showed up with a smile on his face week after week. As we get closer to the playoffs I will be keeping a keen eye on the #3-#5 seeds in the D1 dance as that is where the story is if you ask me.


DIVISION #3 What’s at stake this week?

Everything is as stake this week. I still have no clue what is going to happen here. Team Topper is sitting at 6-1 but everyone knows Topper is one of the worst “bad weather” QBs in the game today. Looks like Topper draws SITE this week in crappy weather. If SITE wins or holds tough everyone will be calling for another first round shocker of Team Topper. DMX v Gryffindor is easily the game of the day in D3. DMX is getting hot at the right time and boasts a tremendous “bad weather” team. Their QB is made for the mud and slop of November. Joey Batts and Co are 5-2 but I don’t think many are giving them a fighting chance this session. A&A is loaded top to bottom but they are another team that could struggle in the mud as they are a quick track team that might not be as efficient in the slop. Bullet Club hasn’t really impressed the last month or so but they should have enough to carry against Sticky Bandits. Are Morning Wood a contender or pretender and more importantly where the heck did their QB go? This is a weird week as many of the “D3 favorites” have easy matchups this week so we might not learn a ton this week. I will say it again there are few players with more pressure on them this week than the Topper as he must shake this “bad weather QB” myth once and for all. If SITE wants to know once and for all if they are to be taken seriously come playoff time this is the week they will find out. Is this it for our #icon Darryl Carr QB Superstar? NO..NO…NO…There is no way he’s retiring he’s still at the top of his game but is it finally time to start thinking about a move to D4 in the Spring?


DIVISION #4 What’s at stake this week?

I bet no one is angrier at the weather right now than 3rd and Schlong. They were getting hot and starting to make a move up the ladder then BOOM the weather struck now they have to start all over again. This week they have (2) big games with Indecent Exposure and their bitter rival No Punt Intended. Though to be honest this game will not be the same without Kyle Coniff in it. I like when he totally covers Katie Keller and she gets all mad. BSS vs Ultimate Warriors should be awesome. BSS has looked dialed in these days especially on offense and could go as high as the #2 seed if they take this game. I need to be honest I never saw that coming. UW is another team that is built for the slop and will shine in the crappy weather of November. HK7 is in a very interesting spot as they sit at 4-2. They have a very winnable game with Steve’s Cuz’ins but what will happen with Cintas? Emily 2.0 and Joey Batts fight back to back with the Stunts but can they fight face to face when Cintas has at it with HK7? NPI looks like they might miss the playoffs unless they can somehow channel the spirits of playoffs past and win 2 games this week and hope for an Indecent Exposure loss or a Steve’s Cuz’ins loss. Easier said than done.


DIVISION #5 What’s at stake this week?

I heard from a friend who has another friend who knows a guy who dated a girl whose college roommate told an acquaintance who told their second cousin twice removed who told their divorce attorney who then told their accountant who saw Topper at Wegmans one day and told him who then told me that Matty Ice could be MIA this week and the Topper could be playing QB for the Angels. Lord help them if the weather sucks. If you want to see the fight of the century look no further than ACE, UFO, Vandalay Industries and Hope N Ruin. (4) teams go to battle this Saturday but only (2) of them walk away with playoff spots. It’s going to be bedlam people! I didn’t do the math but if Witter’s lose they could somehow get thrown into this mess as well. Don’t look now but if the Stunts win and the Topper totally implodes in the weather (which is definitely possible) the Stunts could theoretically steal the #2 seed in the playoffs. I still hope the Stunts and Angels take the #2 and #3 seeds so they meet at some point in these playoffs. IT HAS TO HAPPEN! Wow I just looked again, CFB if they lose both games could end up 3-5 and they too could be in playoff trouble by days end. D5 is easily where the best race is.

DIVISION #6 What’s at stake this week?

To be honest not much, though, if you play for the BiPolar Express this really is your last chance at a victory. Most of the seeds are sown up and I do not expect much to change heading into the playoffs. Celino Sewer Rats and the Peachy Platoon all are off this week which means they don’t really care either. This is really a 3-4 horse race and I still think this could all be about CSR vs PP. You have to feel for BPE. They have quietly gotten better and better week after week. If they don’t win this week they are done like dinner next week as they will face the #1 seed which should beat them rather easily. I still am very surprised Practice Squad is sitting at 3-3 as I think they are way better than their record indicates. They could be a team to keep your eyes on the next few weeks.


5 Questions for Saturday

1. Will the weather hold? It has not been pretty the past few weeks and things do not look so good for Saturday. I wonder if the football Gods do right by the TSL and give us some nice weather for about 8 hours or so.

2. Will Morning Wood figure out their attendance issues or are they heading for a first round shocker this playoff? MW hasn’t really taken the next step like many thought they would. I see talent on their side of the field but they just haven’t shown much consistency in their play or their attendance yet to be considered a serious D3 title threat.

3. So who would win between the #6 seed in D4 (3rd and Schlong) and the #5 seed in D3 (Bullet club). Right now the answer is obviously 3AS as they called out BC at least 2-3 times but apparently Bullet Club must be too afraid to play them right now or like ever.

4.  Where is Bro? There are rumors circulating he might be gone longer than first anticipated. If he is gone for an extended amount of time HATBF might struggle to get out of the 1st round of the playoffs. No one can either confirm nor deny what is actually going on here but we the TSL journalistic universe will continue to dig until we get to the truth. We tried to contact “potted plant” who basically just gave us a “no comment” on the situation.

5.  Is BiPolar Express destined to taste victory this week or are they destined to go winless the rest of the way? Their last and final chance at victory comes this week against a very beatable 2-4 Tight End Zones.


10 Final Thoughts for Saturday

1. The game I have my eyes on this week is in D3 where DMX has it with Gryffindor. These two teams are both sitting at 5-2. DMX has a QB who can thrive in the slop but can Joey Batts overcome crappy weather to push Gryffindor to victory this week? The winner of this game could enter the playoffs as the odds on favorite to take the title home.

2. You have to love the battle looming in D5 between up to as many as like 6 teams. CFB, UFO, ACE, Vandalay, Witters and Hope N Ruin all have either 2 or 3 wins. UFO’s shocking win over HNR on Tuesday totally threw this race into hyper drive. If I had to guess I would say UFO and ACE miss the playoffs. It’s looking like ACE vs Vandalay Industries will be a win and your in situation.

3.  I said it earlier and will say it again I am curious to see how SITE does Saturday. They are   way better than last year but are they a team that should be considered dangerous come playoff time? They have winnable games against Sticky Bandits and Team Topper in the rain. If they win both they might turn some heads but if they don’t then I doubt anyone takes notice.

4. I see a very interesting battle developing in D4 between the #2-#5 seeds. UW, BSS, 3AS, HK7 and Cintas have all had up and down moments this session but each and every team at their best can give Puckett All Stars the fight of their lives in the D4 title game. We should have a clearer idea of who is who by days end in this division.

5. As I write this I thought back to the good ole days. I thought about all the fun we had some time ago when Dove screwed up the clock and Bullet Club got hosed as Cobblestone won at the end. At the time it was a sticky situation but right now I think it’s funny and Bullet Club lost which is even funnier. It’s not funny when a team loses due to a clock mishap. It is funny when a team stacks their roster to win a title they shouldn’t have won but they lose a game due to a clock/ref mishap. I only thought of this because Cobblestone will have some things to think about for the Spring. Yes they are an awesome franchise and yes Darryl Carr QB Superstar is in a league all by himself but it might be time to make the jump to D4. Cobblestone was not in many games this year. One of the best things about this league is you can easily go up and down in divisions. Now I am not calling for CS to go to D4 nor am I saying it in any way, shape or form but what I am saying is it might be time to think about stuff…

6. Will the Cunning Stunts and Matty’s Angels still have their dream matchup before this season ends? More importantly will the Topper fold in the rain and is it possible Matty’s Angels drop both games and the Stunts win and steal the #2 seed? Oh that would be totally cray cray if that happens.

7. Topper has to be looking out his window right now wondering quietly to himself if the rumors are true. Is he truly a “big game QB” or is he “destined for doom” in the bad weather. Topper will be in some of the biggest games of the day Saturday. If Topper lays an egg this week he could cost teams precious playoff spots. Topper could show up and have the day of his life or he could have the worst day of his career on a day that is calling for winds, rain and totally crummy weather. Oh man the Topper will be up against it this week. No pressure Topper…..no…..press……ure…

8. It is Hatfields vs McCoys on this week between the (2) best teams in the game today. Eyes Downtown and Public Enemy FINALLY (weather permitting) will be getting it on at 10am on Field #1. We have discussed the strengths and the weaknesses of both almost to nausea. It is now time for (2) teams to take the field of battle this week to find out which team is better. When all the talking is done and the dusts settles this game will simply come down to execution.

9. Ladies and gentlemen the last few weeks have not been easy here in the TSL Universe. The rain and crappy weather has really affected games which has affected standings which has affected our season. Please remember as we head to the field of battle this week that this is a league of fun and we are doing our best to get the games in and completed so the playoffs can begin. The games may be off a few minutes due to rain etc. so let’s stay patient and do our best together to get through it.

10. Just an FYI….. In the next few days an email will be going out to all captains. Let us first congratulate all teams as they have improved dramatically in the sub abuse portion of the program. In the next few days we will be sending out an email listing specific girls that CAN NOT sub for any team in this sessions playoff. Please also know that each and every sub request for playoffs will be scrutinized and if we feel you are unfairly stacking your team with better players than you have we will simply reject your sub request. Please go to the rule book and check what your options are heading into next weekend.

Week 7 Picks, Thoughts, Questions & Insights

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Thursday, 18 October 2018 20:00
Published: Thursday, 18 October 2018 20:00
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 4528

Right about now I usually tell you that the chase toward social co-ed football immortality is about to begin. I tell you that in the next 2-3 weeks you will have to dig deep to see if you have what it takes to call yourself a champion. Though it is entirely possible you could be spending the entire winter looking out a window wondering to yourself what you could have done better to help your team win a championship.  These are the days that matter as 5, 10, 15 years from now this league, these times and everything that is going on around us will be done. All you will have left is your memories. Yes other things and other activities and other people will come and go in your lives but this league and this way of life will someday be a distant memory.  I say that not to scare you but to remind you that life is precious and it is short so it is imperative that you make the most of the time that you have as you never know when that time is up.

Carpe diem folks carpe diem………..


Where do we go from here? What happens next? Let’s find out shall we……..



ANGRY BUFFALO +7 VS TIGHT ENDS IN MOTION: I am curious to see who suits up for TEIM. Losing both Kyle and Tiger will take its toll on this squad as they lost big time speed they will need to replace. Easier said than done. AB is a hot mess as their girls are struggling, their QB is done and they are playing the back-up but their guys can still flat out go. The question of the day is, can the TEIM girls carry the day as they will be needed big time? I think they might be able to. A few weeks ago, Ben Stack told an associate of mine that TEIM “is more than just Tiger.” With 2 of their best players out and things looking bleak let’s see if Stack comes to play this week as they will need someone to lean on.     TEIM BY 1

RACKS AND SACKS +10 VS EYES DOWNTOWN: RAS was finally on the right side of the fence last week in a big win. Things won’t stay happy long as the big bad wolf is heading their way. ED is dialed in these days as they begin tightening their game up for the playoff chase. ED has RAS pretty much out manned and out gunned at every single position in this game. ED should take this one rather easily if you ask me. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 13

HOOTIE AND THE BROFISH VS MARKETING MAYORS +3:  This is the game that intrigues me. MM are not really playing that well as they sit as 3-3. Yes, I know they are missing Delecki and yes they have had some bumps and bruises but I think their issues right now go a tad deeper than that. Last week I saw a QB just missing easy throws. I always say this, and it falls on deaf ears, but the easy throw isn’t pretty but it gets you yards and offenses need to gain yards. Now that the weather is turning and the fields will turn to slop soon I am curious to see what this does to the run and gun offense of HATBF. This game is for the #3 seed essentially and that matters in D1. I am curious to see if MM takes this and its business a usual or are HATBF arriving a season or two sooner than anticipated.   MARKETING MAYORS BY 3

#XTC +7 VS PUBLIC ENEMY: These two teams know each other quite well. #XTC is up and down at 2-4. PE has been dialed in and has been white hot at 5-0. The PE offense has looked better than ever this session. In most cases PE should run away with this one as they just seem to be dialed in these days but the question remains could PE be looking ahead to Eyes Downtown the week after? PE usually has 1 clunker a session. This one could be closer than you would think. XTC knows where to attack but to attack they must get better play from their QB. PUBLIC ENEMY BY 6



COBBLESTONE  +10 VS GRYFFINDOR: It usually is billed as the “battle of the immortals” between TSL’s (2) greatest stars. I am hearing rumors Joey Batts is so sure he’s going to win that he might just make Tony play QB so he can QB his girls team playing at the same time. Cobblestone used to be a once mighty franchise led by the greatest leader and QB of modern times. They are struggling and that sucks for ratings. I reckon we will see Tony and “Glasses” will finally get a chance to get some time out there to make a case for himself for next season. The Gryff still has Burr so he should feast on the very very very giving secondary of Cobblestone. GRYFFINDOR BY 10

SLYTHERIN THAT END ZONE VS BULLET CLUB +1: The Club has lost their last 2 as the defense has looked awful. It also looks like Joe K has aged like 5 years just in the last 3 weeks.  Don’t look now but SITE is 2-2-1 and can jump the Club in the rankings with a big win. Their offense has looked dialed in and they are playing just enough defense to carry most days. BC better be careful because if they lose this game they could begin to tumble way down the rankings. Both these teams are at a crossroad this week. The winner will get back up into the race while the loser probably hits “also ran” territory and struggles the rest of the way. BULLET CLUB BY 3

UNCLE RICOS TIME TRAVELERS +10 VS STICKY BANDITS +4: This is the battle for the last and final playoff spot in D3. The winner gets a ticket to the D3 dance while the loser will be on the outside looking in come playoff time. URTT has been up and down but appear to be making progress. They still appear to be a D4 caliber team. SB are D3 material but they are missing their inspirational leader. I am hearing rumors ”cardboard cut out” Dave Baker will be in attendance this week. Will he arrive in time and if he does can he save the Sticky season? In time we will find out together.  STICKY BANDITS BY 7

DMX +6 VS 1 TOPPER TOO MANY: DMX is 4-2 and Team Topper is dialed in at 6-0 but let’s talk about a few things. 1. DMX is really good and they are getting hot at the right time. 2. Yes Team Topper is hot but they have been beating up on meh teams the past 2 weeks. 3. DMX and Team Topper used to go at it and DMX was the team that usually got the duke. 4. Team Topper was off last week and rust matters in this league.  Team Topper probably isn’t going undefeated and they are coming off a bye so if ever there was a week for an upset this could be it. Also remember Topper is under the weather and adverse weather conditions could have huge implications with Toppers “unique arm strength and throwing mechanics.”  DMX  BY 1

A&A VS MORNING WOOD +4: This one could be special but do we really know if the Morning Wood QB is ever coming back? If he doesn’t then Dave goes to QB, Mo goes to possession WR, JJ gets to run 1 route over and over again and everyone gets sad. As I wrote that, I wondered to myself how many times Mo MF’D me when he read that he was called a “possession WR” again. A&A has some speed and they have girls that can go so MW better be ready. The MW girls are good but they lack the speed of the A&A girls. Now this all could be a moot point if the weather is crappy and the track is sloppy. I still think in any scenario A&A should be a TD better. A&A BY 7



HK7 VS INDECENT EXPOSURE +4: HK7 might have been reading these articles too much and falling in love with themselves as they laid an egg last week. Yes I know they lost 41-32 but it was all on the offense! Yes I have no clue what that means either. But when a cute blonde girl just shows up one day on a podcast and tells the world the 41-32 loss was all on the offense it’s all on the offense. IE is 2-3 and needs this game as they are starting to slip a bit. Their offense just needs to produce more. HK7 should in theory take this game but anything can happen on any given Saturday. I am hearing rumors one of their ladies might be heading to Cunning Stunts at 10 am instead of HK7 which could cause an issue as it will take away their girl edge. HK7 should still have a few more weapons in this one and should still carry the day.    HK7 BY 3

PUCKETT ALL STARS VS TUNE SQUAD +17: Sometimes in life you see a game on the schedule and go “ruh roh this won’t be good.” TS is getting better and better week after week but things could get ugly early and often in this one. PAS should not be in D4 as they are really good I fear they will absolutely run away with this one.  PAS is loaded on offense, defense and has a QB that can sling. Tune Squad could be in for trouble as they are still struggling trying to get up to speed with the TSL game. In time I think Tune Squad will be just fine in this league but this will be the week they will soon want to forget as the team heading their way could be the class of D4 right now. Let’s hope I am wrong. PUCKETT ALL STARS BY 17

CINTAS  VS ULTIMATE WARRIORS +3: There isn’t a colder team league wide right now than the Ultimate Warriors. They have looked woeful in 2 really bad beats at the hands of HK7 and 3AS. Cintas are lead by the legend and the legend killer Joey Batts. Cintas are 3-1 and have looked very good so far this session. They really need to get moving though as they need to get 9 games in. UW has to stop with the long ball guff and just go out there and get some yards. The easy throw is usually the best throw. UW are good and they have won they just seem to have lost their way. UW can circle the wagons and get back on track but this will be on tough test. This week will be all about execution.    CINTAS BY 4

NO PUNT INTENDED +8 VS 3RD AND SCHLONG: This is one of the greatest rivalries going in the game today but the injury to Kyle will most definitely take some luster of this gem. NPI got a big win last week but one must think without their leader NPI will be in trouble down the stretch. 3AS looks to be gaining steam as they are playing better and better week after week. I still wonder though if the off the field soap operas will catch up with them eventually. Katie Keller is still tied to 40YPG and that anonymous D1 guy. 40 YPG is tied to Molly Morgan and Katie Keller and now he’s fighting with Joe K. NPI is the only team that really shut down the Queen Bee can they do it again? Without Kyle I just don’t see NPI taking this game.  3RD AND SCHLONG BY 7

BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS VS STEVES CUZ’INS +9: Don’t look now but the BSS is 4-2 and it appears their offense is light years ahead of sessions past. BSS is killing it at a clip of like 34 a game and they are playing just enough defense to carry most days. Cousin Steve had a magical week #1 but has fell flat on his face since. This team is struggling to score. The defense has been holding and that’s a good thing but they have to score more points. BSS needs this game as a 5-2 record will put D4 on notice that they are finally for real. Good teams always win the games they are supposed to, so is Buffalo Solar Solutions a good team? BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS BY 8



HOPE N RUIN +7 VS CUNNING STUNTS: The Cunning Stunts are quickly becoming Americas Team. They already have this league’s most beloved superstar but now they are quickly becoming the people’s champion. The Clarke’s are killing it, Katie Keller is the new Queen Bee, they have “Emily 2.0” to already go along with one of the leagues most well liked players in Kelly Liddle. If you add this cast and these characters to your reigning and DEFENDING TSL MVP of everything you have something special brewing. HNR is fighting for their playoff lives as they sit at 1-4. They MUST I repeat MUST win this game but the team they are facing is wicked hot right now. This game should be a barn burner.   CUNNING STUNTS BY 4

HUNG BUFFALO VS ACE +7: This one could get a tad chippy between 2 teams that aren’t afraid to mix it up. ACE has been struggling and I just don’t know what the fix is. Is Ronny K not making the throws? Are the WRS not running the right routes and giving supreme effort? Is the defense lost out there? Too many questions and not enough answers if you ask me. HB is that vet savvy team that just shows up and plays football. They are big and they are strong and they are not afraid of anyone. ACE does have a speed edge but can they get the ball to their speedsters so they can run run run? This is another game that should be good between 2 teams that also match up quite well.  HUNG BUFFALO BY 6

HUNG BUFFALO VS VANDALAY INDUSTRIES +7: I was beginning to forget that VI plays in this league. They are 2-2 but where have they been? HB is looking good these days as they are currently in 4th place. Their offense is decent and they are still playing stout defense. If you like speed this is not the game for you. Both teams are built for the sloppy track and aren’t exactly speed burners. If you do like two good football teams going at it in an old fashioned, old school football game this is the game for you. I see a close one here as these 2 squads matchup quite well with each other.  HUNG BUFFALO BY 6

UFO +10 VS ALL WE DO IS QUINN: AWDIQ is rolling right now as they sit at 5-1 while UFO is free falling at 1-4. I am beginning to wonder if UFO is “starting to lose the room.” UFO literally needs to throw everyone in a cargo van and go to Dave and Busters or Chucky Cheese for team building activities. Right now UFO is starting to get a bad rep and they need to change that. As for the game, AWDIQ is wicked fast and should dink, dunk and run UFO off the field in this one.  I have faith that the UFO leadership will right the ship in time and this season will be a small blip on the radar as this team heads into the future. ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 11

MATTY’S ANGELS VS COME FROM BEHIND +3: CFB is an up and down bunch these days as they are sitting at 3-3. The Angels are off to a nice start at 5-1 but they could be coming to town hopping mad after last week’s debacle with AWDIQ. Did the ref miss the call? Did the Angels have an argument? It matters not now so let’s focus on today. CFB is a vet savvy team that has been in all the big games. MA have a crazy good offense but CFB has a few big tall WR’s that can jump into the sky on their shorter counter parts. It’s getting cold will Paul be at the helm for CFB as that is the most important question in this game. All things being equal the Angels are pretty quick and should carry late. MATTYS ANGELS BY 6


VANDALY INDUSTRIES VS WITTERS +3: Witter’s has been an up and down bunch as they have shown flashes of brilliance but they have also shown flashes of meh. VI is not a speed burner squad but they do a lot of things right. They don’t kill you with speed but they play a solid consistent style that translates to more victories than defeats.  Witter’s is a smart team that has a smart leader. Their mis steps are usually due to not being up to speed quite yet. I see Witter’s giving VI a game. VI isn’t sexy but they just show up and play. Honestly I have no clue which VI team will show as sometimes they are hot to trot and sometimes they are destined for failure. I see a sloppy track and VI is built for the mud so I’m taking VI. VANDALAY INDUSTRIES BY 6




TIGHT END ZONES +7 VS JABRONIES: Jabronies are 3-3 and have shown some good and some bad. Jabronies has a legend on their team named Caleb and Caleb is awesome and he is fast. TEZ is not as fast and will struggle to cover Caleb at all times. Caleb +speed +legend+ fluorescent traffic vests+ traffic wands and flares=MAGICAL. Yes the game will be played and the Jabronies will win but afterwards all hell will break loose as the parking lot will be lit on fire with flares and the parking insanity will begin. Lord help us all each and every one.  JABRONIES BY 3

THE MCKENZIE AGENCY +7 VS CELINO SEWER RATS: TMA is 4-2 and have taken the next step but are they the team to beat? We will find out this week. I am convinced Peachy Platoon and CSR deserve to be in the mix but where does TMA stand? Honestly, I am still not sure. I see talent, I see vet leadership, I see intelligence and I see skill all over the field. The question remains can the 4-2 TMA go heads up with the 5-1 CSR? This is one of the biggest questions heading into this weekend. If they can, look out but if not they could fall back to earth. This game has huge playoff implications for TMA as they must be asking the same question that I am.  CELINO SEWER RATS BY 7

BIPOLAR EXPRESS +1 VS TIGHT END ZONES: If ever there was a week for something supercailifragilisticexpalidocious to happen this could be the week. TEZ is 0-4 and the BPE is 0-5. That means one of these 2 teams will win. Obviously if they tie then I am 100% wrong. OK let’s face facts here BPE is ever improving and they have been in their games the past few weeks. If only the girls could run a little faster or catch a little better or not get Gordon so angry he has to go to the red shirt sometimes that 0-5 record could be 2-3 or 1-4. BPE is up against it. If they are going to win a game this is the week. If not now it might not happen. If the football Gods are kind and just they will give their good ole buddy Gordon something to be happy about. I hope the football Gods let BPE win on the last play that would be magical.  BIPOLAR EXPRESS ON THE LAST PLAY BY 1


5 Questions for Saturday

1. Can TEIM even field a team this week? Good Lord last week was a disaster as they lost 2 of their best players. Who is the next man or woman up? Is a new leader about to emerge? Will they stand tall and continue to win or will these injuries be too much to overcome? Alot more questions than answers for TEIM if you ask me this week.

2. Is Team Topper heading towards an upset this week? They are coming off a bye week. I am hearing the Topper is not feeling 100%. DMX has played them tough in the past and we are expecting a sloppy track this week. Yes Team Topper has come to play week after week but could this be the week they get shocked? Time will tell….

3. Can Bullet Club snap out of this funk they are in or were they actually never as good as we thought to begin with? Maybe Travis and Zach were the brains of the operation and BC has not been able to recover after their departures. I know they have been missing people but BC must do something to shore up a very suspect secondary especially at safety as they are giving up too many yards.

4. Is Joe K going to accept the challenge of 40 Year Plan Guy? I haven’t seen an upper division team “run away” from a lower division team this quickly since Ricky Austin was having none of Matty Ice and A&A a few seasons ago after A&A won their title. Joe K has to accept this challenge and begin damage control on repairing his street cred.

5.  Will “card board cut out Dave Bakers” arrive in time? This is the only question that matters right now. They told us Friday afternoon. Let us all hope and pray together they get delivered in time so they can debut this Saturday.


10 Final Thoughts for Saturday

1. The game I have my eye on is in D6 as someone has to win between the BiPolar Express and Tight End Zones. At 10 am (2) teams with a combined 0-9 record will take the field of battle in hopes of finally tasting victory. The world will be cheering together as one hoping that Gordon finally gets the BPE to victory lane in this one. BPE has been getting better and better week after week they might be finally due.  

2. UFO is 1-4, Hope N Ruin is 1-4 and ACE is 1-5. Small problem there are (3) teams and only (1) precious playoff spot up for grabs. All 3 teams have tough games so this battle might not change much heading into week #8.

3.  Talking about highly contested playoff battles, look no further than the game between Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers and Sticky Bandits. URTT is 1-5 and the Sticky Nation is 1-3. Tie breakers matter in D3 so this game is HUGE. “Card Board Cut Out Dave Baker” could not get here quick enough as this team will need his leadership and general aura of awesomeness in this one. He better be delivered on time….

4. I have now gotten (2) reports that “Emily 2.0” (I.E. Emily of HK7) and Joey Batts are both prepared to forego their regularly scheduled games so they can both be in the Cunning Stunts lineup this week in a big 10 AM game with the reigning and defending D5 champs Hope N Ruin. The Stunts are about two weeks away from WW3 with their bitter rivals Matty’s Angels. I am still surprised and impressed that each player has chosen the “all girl team” over their normal “rostered” team. Now let’s see if they both hold true to their promises. Saying and doing are (2) entirely different things.

5. If I was wearing a Marketing Mayors jersey I would be feeling rather un-easy this week. They are sitting at 3-3 and their team hasn’t exactly been very sharp this session. A HUGE game with HATBF is up next. I am curious to see how the “sandlot” team does against the “text book” team. Both are completely different but both have had success in this league lets see which style wins out this week.

6. 3rd and Schlong vs No Punt Intended honestly was starting to turn into a tremendous rivalry but the injury to Kyle Coniff will take some luster off this game. Rivals are rivals but one of the first people to contact me asking about Kyle and how he was doing with his injury was actually Scott Keller Jr of 3AS so this rivalry is a friendly one of respect and competition. BTW if anyone is wondering Kevin Keller is still on the trading block. NPI totally shut Katie Keller down last season lets see if they still have the magic formula as it appears no one else does. The only other person that can fluster Katie Keller is my bitter rival Lenny.

7. Ultimate Warriors have lost their last 2 games by a margin of 67-32 now a very solid 3-1 Cintas is up next. UW must stop the long ball junk and just go get 7-8 yard gains. The safe and easy throw is usually the best throw. Yards in crappy weather are tougher to come by so just go make easy throws. 32 points in the last 2 weeks will not win you another D4 title. A QB that has put a clinic on in this league of “taking what the defense gives you” is up next. This is a copycat league go copy Joey Batts.

8. The Topper Prize and Punishment Wheel will once again be at work hopefully around noon time or so as our friends from Jabronies will be helping us with parking vehicles for an hour or so. If you see road flares, kids in fluorescent traffic vests running around carrying traffic wands don’t be nervous or afraid everything is OK.

9. I am very curious to see how the McKenzie Agency does this week with Celino Sewer Rats. I thought Peachy Platoon was going to run away with D6. Then I thought CSR was in the hunt as well. Then I thought Practice Squad might join the race. Now I have questions on if TMA will turn this into a fatal four way for the title. TMA is a vet savvy team that continues to gel. If they want to know where they stand this is the week they will see if they are contenders or pretenders. I think TMA is ready to fight this week.  

10. I still am not sure who the contenders and pretenders are in D3. I see a very good team in Morning Wood I just don’t see a team that is consistently 100% at the fields. Will their QB show? Where is JJ? What about A&A? They haven’t had the attendance issues of seasons past but they still have weeks they are not at 100%. I so hope A&A vs Morning Wood brings both teams to the fields at 100%. I want to see a good old fashioned slug fest between 2 very good teams. I also want to know who I should be keeping my eyes on. D3 is the only division in this league that I still am not 100% sure who the top 4-5 teams are. I usually know who is who which means I know who the top 4-5 teams are but usually it is easy to slot them 1-5. Right now that’s literally impossible in D3. Hopefully things will be a tad more clear by the end of Saturday.

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