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Week 6 Thoughts, picks, insights and disappointments!!

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 27 September 2019 12:40
Published: Friday, 27 September 2019 12:40
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 2141


Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, Week 6 is upon us!


Week 5 was everything it could’ve been and more. We saw some big wins by quite a few teams last week that has once again proved to us that the only thing we know about how this session will play out is that we don’t know anything about how this session will truly play out.


The sun was scorching the fields at the Angry Buffalo, and it definitely caused more than a few of our TSLers to do some silly things along the way as dehydration ran wild all over the place. As sunburned faces searched for water, others were off searching for love. In this very column, over the last few weeks, I’ve been advocating for Scotty Dro from Frodo Swaggins. He’s been emailing me and calling his shots all over the place. I liked his moxie, and I was impressed with the swagger of a new QB who hadn’t done much yet in the TSL, but he sure acted the part of someone who did. I felt like he was going to be the next big thing, and maybe he still is, but after all of the hype, it appears he fell short when it was his turn to go to bat.


You simply cannot tell the world about your crush, and that you want to marry her, and whatever else, and then COMPLETELY DROP THE BALL AND NOT TALK TO HER WHEN SHE’S ON THE FIELDS RIGHT NEXT TO YOU. Topper is a genius Scotty. He knew months ago that you’d fall in love with “Casey from Quinn” and that’s why he waited until the perfect moment to put you two on the fields next to each other. You called your shot, pointed to the bleachers like you were going to hit a home run, and foul tipped the ball into the catcher’s glove.


I’m disappointed. I was hoodwinked into thinking this was going to be something special. Hell, even 40 Year Plan Guy took multiple swings at Katie Keller along the way. And on top of all of this, I realized that I was wrong about Scotty. He’s still got a ways to go to be a superstar here. So it’s made me question everything else I thought about our Faux Romeo. I got angry emails two weeks ago from Garrett Beesing, letting me know that his hands were never the problem. I was wrong Garrett, I can now assume it’s Scotty who is the problem. I’m sorry. Scotty also stepped up and started to call for the end of Joey Batts’ career, saying he was done. Clearly, believing that was wrong too. And that’s why to help young Scotty make a love connection, I went to Joey to see if he’d be willing to give any tips to help “Dro” out on finding love. “The Dream” Joey Batts proceeded to accept my apology for not believing in him, and he stepped up to give some advice. Presenting, Joey Batts’ Love Corner!!!


At least, this is where Joey’s Love Corner was supposed to be. Instead, he has also disappointed me and despite knowing the article has a deadline, he’s not sent me anything after saying he would days ago.


You really can’t trust anyone anymore. So if there’s a TSLer out there who would love to give Scotty some love advice, please email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. and I’ll post that advice here next week!


And now, let’s get onto the games:




Last Week’s Games:

Public Enemy 31, Tight Ends In Motion 22

Tight Ends In Motion 14, Marketing Mayors 13

Marketing Mayors 35, Public Enemy 28

Eyes Downtown 35, Gryffindor 0


Public Enemy, TEIM, and the Mayors had a triple threat match last weekend, and when the dust was settled, all of them came out 1-1. Shout out to Tight Ends, as I said in my last article that they’ve been getting really close to finally winning some of these close games, and just like that they took out the defending champs. There was also talk that had they not had to start shorthanded with a QB that wasn’t McKenrick they would’ve been 2-0 on the day. But, they weren’t, and that’s okay. They’re beginning to peak at the right time. Public Enemy handled TEIM but dropped a decision to the Mayors in a close contest. It doesn’t help that Mike Boccio was sent to the Cleveland Clinic this week for further tests on his concussion that he didn’t (but did he?) get a few weeks ago, as he was sent there by his doctor and caretaker, Diana Bernard. Get well soon little guy. Finally, Eyes Downtown handily disposed of Gryffindor, giving Joey one last chance to get that elusive first win in D1.


This Week’s Games:


Tight Ends In Motion vs Gryffindor (+13) – It hurts to have to write that spread, but it makes sense. Gryffindor has been abused twice now by TEIM, but there is one difference this week: They’re playing at 10:00. The last two games had been at the day’s end, but this time Gryffindor will show up ready to go, bright eyed and bushy tailed, while we aren’t sure if TEIM will start the “too early” game with a full squad. Let’s do it: GRYFFINDOR BY 2


Eyes Downtown vs Marketing Mayors (EVEN) – The current champs against the current number one contenders to the throne, I couldn’t make a line on this one no matter how hard I tried. The Mayors have seemed a little more up and down lately, while this whole season it feels that Eyes Downtown has been on cruise control. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 4




Last Week’s Games

Energy Buff 21, We Back 0 (Forfeit)

Dilf’s 33, Bullet Club 27


A very slow week for D2, as they only had two games and one of them was a forfeit. What a weak move by We Back. We aren’t sure they’ll be back at all this session, but I can assure you that the TSL is taking measures to replace them with a team so others won’t be having to miss out on games because of this nonsense. The other matchup was a bit of a barnburner and BC and the Dilf’s went back and forth in this one before the Dilf’s punched in a game winning touchdown that saw Dubey throw the ball to Eric Stegs, which just might be the oldest combined TD combo in league history.


This Week’s Games:


Bullet Club vs Energy Buff (+3) – Two teams that have traveled similar paths meet up in a “Who Doesn’t Get To Play Peachy/A&A In Round 1 of the playoffs” matchup. Both teams have only one win this season (against We Back), both have had attendance issues, and both have this game circled as “must win” on the calendar. BULLET CLUB BY 6


HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO vs Peachy Platoon (EVEN) – A great offense versus a great defense. I’m giving Team Topper all of the credit here so far, even if they’ve played a weaker schedule than most of D2. If this defense is truly going to be “legit”, here’s their biggest test to date. This “D1 Jr.” matchup is MUST SEE TV here. Peachy is still great, but if there’s one area they’ve struggled with so far, its playing against smart veteran teams who know how to stop them. How will this one go? PEACHY PLATOON BY 3


A&A vs Dilfs (+6) – A lot of questions on this game, and most of them just come from who is going to show up on both sides. Dubey finally graced the TSL with his aura last week and the Dilf offense was better than ever. A&A has had some attendance issues as well, although a lot of that had to do with injury issues. With a week off, perhaps they’ll be able to have rested and get everyone to the fields? If the Dilfs have championship aspirations, this is a game they need to win. DILFS BY 1


Slytherin That End Zone vs Energy Buff (+8) – SITE also comes back after a week off. Energy Buff could really use all of their horses for this one. It seems every week they’re missing Ben Stack or some of their girls, or their QB, etc. If they’re at full strength for once, they could pull the upset here. SITE really likes to get down early and make a comeback, so it’ll be on them to come out of the gate hot. Look for Newman to Dawson early, that guy is a heck of a WR. SITE BY 7


Slytherin That End Zone vs We Back (+21) – The line is simply what it’ll be when We Back tries to forfeit again. Even if they play: SITE BY 21




Last Week’s Games:

No Punt Intended 44, End Game 30

3rd & Schlong 41, Ultimate Warriors 32

Jabronies 39, Sticky Bandits 16

No Punt Intended 33, Puckett All-Stars 21

All We Do Is Quinn 44, Vaspian 18

Jabronies 29, Frodo Swaggins 28

Puckett All-Stars 32, Sticky Bandits 28


A BIG slate of games for our D3 division this last week. What did we learn? Well, we learned that No Punt Intended really is a contender for the throne as they went 2-0 in games they had to win. The biggest winners of the day were the Jabronies, who knocked off Frodo Swaggins (And their distracted QB) along with winning the big bet that ended up being a small bet against Sticky Bandits. Sticky had a rough day at the office, going 0-2. Quinn continued being awesome, and didn’t take Vaspian lightly. They walked away with an easy win, Vaspian walked away with a learning experience. Puckett hung in there with NPI and then beat Sticky to get that elusive first win of the season. With how the standings are shaping up, they have the ability to sneak in the playoffs still. 3rd and Schlong continues their ascent up the standings with another victory. The Keller clan is coming together and they’re looking to be a tough out the rest of the way after a shaky start. End Game is looking like they might have some work to do to stay in the playoff hunt or they risk dropping out.


This Week’s Games:


Puckett All-Stars vs Ultimate Warriors (EVEN) – This game has big playoff implications. Both teams are sitting just on the outside looking in, but getting a win here most likely puts them in the Top 8 after Week 6 is over. Not only that, but this game will help in terms of tiebreakers as well. I like how Puckett played last week, but I’ve liked how the Warriors have played all season (mostly). ULTIMATE WARRIORS BY 8


Frodo Swaggins vs Ultimate Warriors (+6) – Frodo needs to make sure they win this one, as the loss to the Jabronies have put them into the 4/5 matchup zone that they most likely don’t want to be in. If Scotty is any form of a man, he’ll be wanting to prove himself in this one as well. The Warriors are going to have a battle with Puckett just before, so they’ll be a little tired going into this one. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 10


All We Do Is Quinn vs No Punt Intended (+7) – I’ve done this every year. It always feels to me that NPI has turned a corner during a season, I talk them up and pick them to win, and they lose by 30. Not this year. They need to prove it to me more than ever that they’re a legit contender. A win against Quinn would absolutely do that. Quinn is still just rolling. Vince slings it, Rawdin catches it, and if he doesn’t, one of Cat, Emily, or Casey does it for him. It just isn’t fair. AWDIQ BY 12


Jabronies vs 3rd & Schlong (+7) – Two of the hottest teams in D3 are going to go head to head this week. Jabronies laid their claim to the throne with two big wins over contenders last week. 3AS has found their mojo and they’re looking like the team that took the TSL by storm not too long ago. A win here for 3AS would be huge, and it’d announce to everyone else that they’re back. I love me some Kellers. 3RD AND SCHLONG BY 1


No Punt Intended vs Sticky Bandits (+3) – Sticky easily would’ve been favored in this game before the devastating Week 5 that they had. Now it seems they’re mortal. Whispers have been abound that the QB situation is part of the problem, as a returning from injury Rags hasn’t been nearly as good as Sticky would’ve hoped. The team seems to play better with Mike Thomas at QB, and one has to wonder which way they’re going to go this time. NPI has one hell of a week ahead of them as well, they can’t afford to go 0-2. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 4


Sticky Bandits vs Vaspian (+7) – Vaspian is a fun team that are quite athletic and still get all of the credit in the world for not only starting in D3 as a brand new team, but for actually performing well and competing too. However, if there’s on thing Sticky can do better than anyone, it’s out smart their opponents, especially when they’re brand new. STICKY BANDITS BY 13




Last Week’s Games:

Buffalo Solar Solutions 29, Mountain Dew Me 23

Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers 41, Full Throttle 21

Buffalo Solar Solutions 46, Matty’s Angels 43

Matty’s Angels 35, Cunning Stunts 17


HOLD. THE. PHONE. Just like in every single video game, it appears that this final boss can be slayed as well. Buffalo Solar Solutions may have had the best day at the office last week, and that’s saying something. First they disposed of Mountain Dew Me, ho hum. But then they took on the beasts of D4, looked them in the eye, and slayed them. It is on me for saying this division is basically over already, I was wrong. BSS has shown that they can compete here, and always in the TSL, we know nothing. Matty’s fueled that anger into a victory with their championship revenge against the Stunts later on. Shout out to Uncle Rico’s who are finally finding their way with a nice win over Full Throttle.


This Week’s Games:


Full Throttle vs Mountain Dew Me (EVEN) – I’m well aware that Full Throttle defeated MDM 28-14 in Week 1, but that feels like it was ages ago. Since then these two teams feel like they’re going in different directions. I know that FT has a better record than MDM still, but I’ve been getting more reports on how MDM is getting better each week, and I don’t feel that with FT. Look for some MDM revenge win here. MOUNTAIN DEW ME BY 6


Cunning Stunts vs Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers (+10) – The Stunts can NOT be happy after getting shown up by the Angels once again. With Matty’s regaining the title of “best gender team” last week, one has to think that the Stunts (in their cool new jerseys!) will be looking to just stomp a mudhole in poor Uncle Rico’s. If QB Tim can keep his cool instead of being enamored with certain members of the Stunts, they might stand a chance. No, I don’t think he can do it either. CUNNING STUNTS BY 13


Matty’s Angels vs Full Throttle (+11) – The worst thing that could happen to a team that’s on a hot streak is a game against Matty’s Angels. So what do you think happens when a team is on a cold streak? MATTY’S ANGELS BY 20


Buffalo Solar Solutions vs Mountain Dew Me (+6) – Through the magic of 6 team division scheduling, we’re getting this game again so quickly after the 29-23 BSS win last week. This is the perfect spot for a “let down” game for BSS after they must be ridin’ high from the big wins. BSS has to make sure that they don’t assume they’ll win this one just because they won last Saturday. BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS BY 7




Last Week’s Games:

Practice Squad 38, Cobblestone 6

Hope N Ruin 22, Pink Pteratacos 12

Hung Buffalo 22, Pink Pteratacos 13

Hung Buffalo 42, Cobblestone 14


D5 didn’t have a ton of action last week, but the games that did happen pretty much cemented what we already kind of know: Cobblestone and Pink Pteratacos are not that great. Team Darryl Carr QB Superstar has had quite the fall from grace the last few sessions (they were in D3 a few seasons ago, I swear), and this week’s 0-2 record seems to fan the flames of D6 whispers for both next season. Hung Buffalo got two big wins though, as they try to keep pace with the Big 3 of D5. Speaking of the Big 3 of D5, Practice Squad got a lights out win against Cobblestone, further proof that they’re for real in this division.


This Week’s Games:


Over Compensators vs Practice Squad (+12) – It feels just down right dirty to make Practice Squad a double digit underdog here, but the OC is just THAT DAMN GOOD. They average about 15 more points a game than PS, and give up about 5 points less a game. If anything, the line might not be high enough. This is absolutely one of the best games of the day though. Keeping up the Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out theme from past articles, PS is taking on Iron Mike here. If they can figure out how to stop Larry and the OC’s offense, they’d be the first it seems. OVER COMPENSATORS BY 10


Hope N Ruin vs Cobblestone (+9) – I don’t give Cobblestone smack on purpose or to be a jerk. I know they’re a great bunch of people, but I’ll keep saying that they need stability at quarterback to really make this this work. Darryl is a future Hall of Famer (don’t listen to Rameer) but its time they get Garrett to be full time QB. HNR is starting to right the ship after a slower start. They’re an uncharacteristic 1-4, but perhaps they’re starting to get things right before playoffs, where they’ve shown they can take it to the next level. HOPE N RUIN BY 6


En Fuego vs Hung Buffalo (+8) – Hung Buffalo got a little bit of their swagger back last week, but in reality they just beat up on the two worst teams in the division. HB’s real test comes this week in the form of the jorts wearing juggernauts of En Fuego. Last time we saw En Fuego, The OC was smacking them around the Rose Garden. Blasé LaDuca spent the bye week just sitting next to a reflection pool thinking about life and what’s next for his team. Well, a date with HB seems to be it. Should be a good one. EN FUEGO BY 7


Hope N Ruin vs Come From Behind (+7) – Both teams have similar defenses, but Hope N Ruin has the offensive advantage. Paul LoVullo still has some of the best hair in the league, and he can still sling it, but the touchdowns just aren’t there like they used to be. This perennial D5 matchup should be close, but for now I’d take HNR. HOPE N RUIN BY 4


Come From Behind vs Pink Pteratacos (+8) – The Pteratacos shouldn’t be favored against anybody at this point, even the potential “older veteran team playing their second game in the sun” matchup they have here. I’ll continue to point out how good their girls are, but that’s about the only thing PP has going for them. Look for Mark to blow this team up, and we’ll be seeing the Pink UFOs come to a D6 Spring Session near you. COME FROM BEHIND BY 10




Last Week’s Games:


Tater Tots 34, Blitzkrieg 18

pAssless Chaps 26, TMA 18

The BiPolar Express 36, Shattered Dreams 24

Zack Attack 20, The Replacements 14

Zack Attack 27, The BiPolar Express 24

Graves Bros 37, Wild Oak Beard Co 25


Here’s another division where the “Top 3” has officially become a “Top 5”. Zack Attack went 2-0 this week, and they lead the division with a 6-1 record. They took over the “top contender” throne with their win against the BPX this weekend. But, multiple reports told me that the Attack blew a 27 – 8 lead in the second half as soon as Cat Peters appeared on the field. BPX also disposed of Shattered Dreams this weekend, a team that is slowly adjusting to life in the TSL. They had BPX on the ropes for a little bit I guess, before a costly pick gave the game away. The Tater Tots came through in their big “playoff positional seeding” game against Blitzkrieg. That should be huge for the tiebreakers that will undoubtedly come into play at season’s end. WOBCO’s little hot streak came to an end against Graves Bros. The Bros have been rushing Gronk all season, and for a newer team like WOBCO, it can be a little intimidating when a giant man with incredible quickness is barreling down on your QB. Finally, in the game of the day, the pAssless Chaps reminded everyone that this division runs through them as they take in a victory against TMA in what could easily be the D6 title game.


This Week’s Games:


pAssless Chaps vs Blitzkrieg (+10) – The problem for Blitzkreig isn’t so much their offense. They can score. But their defense might be better off getting a couple of kids from the nearby preschool. They can’t stop anyone. Coach Jay and the Chaps should be ready to pick them apart in this one. PASSLESS CHAPS BY 13


Wild Oak Beard Co vs Shattered Dreams (+7) – Two new teams that improve each week meet up in this one. Wild Oak looks to get back to their winning ways after a loss to Graves. Shattered Dreams looks to get their first win in the TSL ever. Last week, the Shattered Dreams QB allegedly had clown face paint on at the bar, so I’m excited to hear about if he does it again this week. WILD OAK BEARD CO BY 10


The Bi-Polar Express vs The Replacements (+10) – The problem for The Replacements here may be their lack of females that can hang with the BPX girls. BPX has scored nearly double the points of The Replacements this season, and I just don’t see a way for TR to really keep up here. THE BI-POLAR EXPRESS BY 13


Zack Attack vs TMA (EVEN) – This is a BIG game for D6. TMA is coming off a loss to the Chaps, while the Attack sit atop of this wild division. QB Ryan and Good Nick have made worlds of difference for TMA (Although Steph Czaja might have been the best FA pick up by Ferger this season). The Attack can score, and they can exploit. They can also play defense too, and that’s the biggest reason they have a great shot to take this one home. One Day, I’ll learn more about them. ZACK ATTACK BY 8


Graves Bros vs Tater Tots (+7) – The Tots come into this one looking to make their own claim to the “contenders” group in D6. A win here would surely do just that, or at the very least put them in the conversation. Graves is looking to keep running with the big dogs in the top of D6, so this is a game they have to win here. And they should. GRAVES BROS BY 14


TMA vs Tater Tots (+9) – Drunk Meg vs Drunk Meg’s Boyfriend. There HAS to be a bet on this right? I know that 98% of TMA reads this article (Hi Brent!) so can ONE of you get there to be some sort of bet? Come on. Do it for America. Do the Tots read this? If they do, you get to work on your end. This could be a fun 3:00 game to watch. TMA BY 10




1.      Can Scotty Dro redeem himself after failing so hard? Seriously, you can’t call your shot and let your crush know you’re all about her, and then get more tight lipped around her than a Target mannequin. You made me look foolish Scotty, I’m not thrilled about it.


2.      Will We Back show up? My Sources say no. Seriously, I’ve been hearing murmurs that there’s definitely going to be a fill in team for this week, and perhaps the rest of the season. No, you can’t be on it.



3.      Will Topper be a changed man after his spiritual trip to Scotland? More than likely not. He’ll be the same Uncle Topper, but I really just wanted to take this moment and let him know that most of my associates at the fields did say that he was missed greatly this week.


4.      Will we have any teams have an undefeated season? With only a few weeks left in the regular season, we have only THREE TSL teams that have yet to receive a loss yet this session: HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO, A&A, and The Over Compensators. Since Team Topper and A&A play each other still this season, that means one of them will lose along the way (of course they’ll end up tying), and The OC plays their toughest test the rest of the way this week against Practice Squad. If they can win that one, they have a great chance to be undefeated.



5.      Did you prepare for that hot September sun? While I was hanging out on a nice, breezy day in my backyard in Des Moines, Iowa on Saturday last week, I heard most of you were being burned alive by the sun. I already know you didn’t wear sunscreen, but seriously, take a look at the weather channel before coming to the fields and stay hydrated. It’s looking to be in the 70s again next weekend, but this time it seems we might see some rain before day’s end.




1.      Here’s your must watch list for this week:

a.      10:00 – Over Compensators vs Practice Squad – Field 4

b.      11:00 – HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO vs Peachy Platoon – Field 1

c.       12:00 – Marketing Mayors vs Eyes Downtown – Field 1

d.      1:00 – All We Do Is Quinn vs No Punt Intended – Field 2

e.      2:00 – Jabronies vs 3rd and Schlong – Field 1

f.        3:00 – Vaspian vs Sticky Bandits – Field 1


2.      Shout out to Travis for another successful rendition of “Titos with Travis”, as he had on Gabe and Heather from Vaspian. Go watch it on our Facebook page (Like it if you haven’t!) and learn about some of our newest TSLers!



3.      This shouldn’t be hard, but seriously people, don’t get in the refs faces. League Expulsion is an option. Think before you do anything stupid.



4.      The one team in each division I think everyone is sleeping on: Tight Ends In Motion, Slytherin that end zone, 3rd and Schlong, Mountain Dew Me, Hung Buffalo, and Wild Oak Beard Company.


5.      The more stories I hear from my associates, the more I hear about teams rushing a guy instead of a girl. I know that its been done like that by many teams over the years, but usually your fastest girl rushing is the norm. So that got me thinking: What is your preference on rushing? Personally, I think having a fast girl rush is the way to go. I also know there’s two trains of thought on HOW to rush. I’ve always been an advocate for the rusher to take a few steps back into the play when counting and then rushing full speed ahead at 5 seconds to time it jussssttt right at 6 one thousand. A fast girl who knows how to “speed count” without getting flagged is a HUGE asset. Shout out to Maggie LaMantia, who may just be the best in the business when it comes to female rushers. She scary.



6.      The TSL’s Current “Bernal Family” Rankings:

a.      1st – Travis: was excellent on the podcast and started Tito’s with Travis. Plus he’s playing lights out.

b.      2nd – Diana: Scoring touchdowns and having fun, word has also gotten to me from unnamed sources that she’s the family’s best singer as well.

c.       3rd – Boccio: dragging this concussion thing out a little too long

d.      4th – Val: she takes pictures, sure, but what has she really DONE this season? We should expect more from the First Lady of the TSL. Expect a bounce back week this weekend.


7.      Just want to give another Good Job to the Buffalo Solar Solutions crew. Beating Matty’s Angels is awesome and they’ve really been playing good football for the entire 2019 calendar year.


8.      With the return of Topper, perhaps we’ll also see the return of the Topper Wheel of Hope? ONE MORE SPIN LETS GOOOOO!


9.      I heard on the Official TSL Podcast this week that pAssless Chaps member Makensey (is that actually spelled right?) would have loved to be in Breakfast Club, but she didn’t know how to sign up. I know for a fact that Topper emails all of your captains before the season starts to have them tell you to sign up. If you’re not getting word about it, yell at your captains!


10.   Please do us all a favor and DO NOT PARK ON THE STREETS BY FIELD 5. I know Rameer touched on this, but I want to do it as well. That includes you, referees. We see you. You’re the example setters for the league on this one. Thanks for you cooperation everyone!



Week 6 is comin’ in hot and the playoff races are taking shape. There’s a LOT of big games this week for a lot of teams, and I Personally can’t wait to wake up Sunday morning and see the results in my email.


Scotty, seriously, you owe me.


Good luck this week guys and be safe out there. I won’t be watching. . .

The Godfather - Week 5 picks, predictions, thoughts and stuff

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 20 September 2019 15:37
Published: Friday, 20 September 2019 15:37
Written by Super User
Hits: 2779

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, I regret to inform you that on this Saturday, September 19th in the Year of Our Lord 2019, we will officially be at the halfway point of the Fall Season.


I know, I know, it’s just awful for us to have to think about a world where our TSL fun is now getting closer to its winter hibernation, but the road to Social Co-Ed Football Immortality is truly taking some interesting turns! The weather might be getting a bit colder, but the race is heating up! We finally have a bit of an idea (or so we think anyway) on how our divisions are going to shake out. Contenders have emerged across all of our divisions, and while the dust is far from settled, Its time for me to guess at how its all going to end!



Odds to Win Championship:

Eyes Downtown 3-1

Marketing Mayors 3-1

Public Enemy 5-1

Tight Ends In Motion 15-1

Gryffindor 50-1


Last Week’s Games:

Public Enemy 35, Marketing Mayors 14

Eyes Downtown 34, Public Enemy 27

Tight Ends In Motion 40, Gryffindor 15


The division is shaping up as a two horse race here, with Eyes Downtown sitting atop the division by half a game over the defending champions, Marketing Mayors. Bobby has his team focused more than ever, and while I once feared there may be some unrest in the huddle early on, that thought has been extinguished. In fact, love is the answer for this team right now as Joey Ruderman made Jeff Farr the luckiest man in (at the very least) Eyes Downtown history by saying “yes”. (Congrats on the engagement guys!). Marketing Mayors definitely didn’t play their best game against Public Enemy last weekend, but they’ve had PE’s number a bit more often than not it seems, and they’re the defending champs, which causes me to give them better odds at winning. Think Public Enemy has a chip on their shoulder? PE went from a 100 game winning streak or whatever it was to becoming the “other team” in D1. Does that perception change if they don’t lose at the buzzer to Eyes Downtown? Perhaps. But for right now, PE feels a bit off overall and it’ll be interesting to see how their second half of the season shapes up. They can very easily win this championship, by the way, and those 5-1 odds are most likely never going to be higher the rest of the season. Assuming, of course, that Diana Bernard lets Boccio ever play football again. Tight Ends In Motion has made strides since moving up to the big show but while they’ve come close to some big wins in the division, they haven’t been able to really get over the D1 hump. They play the “Big 3” very closely and they really seem to have Gryffindor’s number (outscoring them 75-15 in two games). They’re VERY close to breaking out and becoming players in the division. As for Gryffindor, other than just being unable to come close to beating Tight Ends (perhaps playing them late in the day is the issue?) they’re still much better than a 1-6 record indicates. No, they most likely will not win D1. But could they pull an upset off in the playoffs? Perhaps. They have the talent and the knowledge, they just need to put together one or two extra plays that go their way. It’ll be fun to see if they can do that.


Prediction: Eyes Downtown takes the championship, causing everyone else to train really hard in the offseason to defeat them in the Spring.


This Week’s Games:


Public Enemy vs Tight Ends In Motion (+8) – The PE vs TEIM small rivalry that was brewing feels all but dead as of late, but it can very easily be sparked right up with a TEIM win here. I know I said Tight Ends is close to a big win, but I don’t think this one is it. PE was very close to sweeping the Mayors and Eyes Downtown last week, and even with another big matchup with MM looming, I can’t see them getting caught overlooking this one. PUBLIC ENEMY BY 6


Marketing Mayors vs Tight Ends In Motion (+10) – The line would’ve been the same for both TEIM games had this game not been immediately after the first one. Having to play the Mayors when you’re fresh is one thing, having to play them right after a game when they’re not tired is another. MARKETING MAYORS BY 10


Eyes Downtown vs Gryffindor (+8) – Gryffindor lost to ED 48-45 only two weeks ago and you can bet your first born child that Joey Batts and Jeremy Burr want nothing more than to get that first D1 win (their only win was in a D2 crossover game) against Bobby and Co. The best path to getting that to happen is to find a way to get Jill and Amanda (Gryffindor’s females are way too underrated, for the record) going and playing smart. Is this the time for the win? Sources say yes. GRYFFINDOR BY 2


Public Enemy vs Marketing Mayors (EVEN) – A true pick’em if there ever was one, these two teams have played in some excellent games against each other recently, and you’d have to assume the Mayors want to get that win back from last week. MARKETING MAYORS BY 1



Odds to Win Championship:


Peachy Platoon 3-1

A&A 4-1


Dilfs 8-1

Slytherin That End Zone 8-1

Bullet Club 15-1

Energy Buff 50-1

We Back 1000000000000-1


Last Week’s Games:

HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO 36, Slytherin That End Zone 18

A&A 42, Bullet Club 30

Peachy Platoon 29, Energy Buff 6

A&A 41, Slytherin That End Zone 29

Peachy Platoon 62, We Back 6

Dilf’s 47, We Back 12


Peachy has shown up, and they’re just winning football games. Now, before the A&A fans come at me, there’s a few reasons that Peachy has better odds here. First, they didn’t ACTUALLY lose to A&A. It isn’t their fault that the only two people of the 107 that were watching that game that thought it was a catch were the refs. Second, A&A is suffering a bit from the injury bug, and who knows just how hard that will bite them along the way. I get it. HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO has only allowed 40 points so far this season but they’ve also played the easiest possible schedule anyone in D2 could’ve played at this point. Wins over We Back, Energy Buff, and “Bullet Club with Joe K having to be QB” aren’t that impressive, and just last week they were losing to Slytherin before coming on strong in the second half. We still don’t really know just how good this team is, (mind you they ARE good) and their road to the playoffs will show us where they should be truly ranked. The Dilfs are the team that feels like they’re just on the outside looking in to the championship party. The D2 dark horse, they’ve used their great tag team of talent and their combined 750 years of experience to compete in every single game they’ve played. Granted, they’ve only defeated We Back and Energy Buff so far, but close losses to Gryiffindor, Slytherin, and Peachy are indicative that they’re a force to be reckoned with. Slytherin can pretty much sum up their first half of the season with one word: inconsistent. They tend to have one good half and one not so good half. They had comeback wins against Bullet Club and the Dilfs, and they blew a lead against Team Topper last week. They lost to A&A and Peachy by 12 and 13 points respectively. They’re competing very nicely (after preseason worries about moving up) but they need a little something extra to get over that hump. Newman deserves a lot of credit for the season he’s been having so far. It’s really great to see him back to it after his injury issues. Bullet Club exists. I don’t think any team has ever had more issues getting their players to games quite like they have over the years. Let’s try to be positive Joe K’s crew though. The Club’s 1-5 record still looks worse than it could be. They’ve had the hardest schedule so far. They were the lucky team that drew Eyes Downtown in the crossover game, and they got blitzed by Peachy in Week 1 when nobody was truly ready for them. Their defense played well against Team Topper but they didn’t have a QB that game and it cost them. They blew a 10 point lead against Slytherin, and they played A&A close last week before allowing a late TD that ended the game instead of giving them a chance to win. It could be better, but it isn’t. And it’s hard to get any semblance of team chemistry when you have a different lineup each week. Energy Buff can tell you all about that one. The Buff has yet to really have their entire team show up either. I’m not sure where Tommy is, but he needs to QB this team ASAP. This is another team that has shown up with different rosters just about every week, and the players that are usually missing are good ones. They lost one score games to A&A and the Dilfs, and got blown out by Marketing Mayors, Team Topper, and Peachy. I’m not entirely sure what this team is exactly, and at this point I don’t think they do either. They have 4 games left to turn things around with some winnable games against We Back, Bullet Club, and Slytherin. We Back is, unfortunately, going through some stuff right now. Consistently having to pick up players off the USL, having people not show up, and injuries have really turned this team from slightly comical to a downright tragedy. Props to the players that have been showing up each week, only to be left out to dry every time. Things aren’t going to get better anytime soon it seems, but hopefully by the Spring they can get a roster together and give this the proper “go” in D4.


Prediction: Uncle Topper refuses to give the people what they want, and defeats A&A in the playoffs to prevent Peachy – A&A Part Deux. Peachy goes on to take D2.


This Week’s Games:


Dilfs vs Bullet Club (+7) – If Bullet Club is going to salvage this season at all, this is the place to start. If the Dilfs want to keep their dark horse status, this is a game they have to win. There is a fun little narrative with Travis’ first game against BC after leaving them as well. I’d like to think that there’s a bit of revenge on the Club’s mind. Not sure if that matters here. DILFS BY 3


Energy Buff vs We Back (+15) -  Energy Buff gets their crack at We Back this weekend, in a battle of two 0-5 teams. Buff should finally get that elusive first win. ENERGY BUFF BY 13



Odds To Win Championship:


All We Do Is Quinn 2-1

Sticky Bandits 4-1

Frodo Swaggins 5-1

Jabronies 8-1

No Punt Intended 8-1

The Field 20-1


Last Week’s Games:

Vaspian 25, End Game 13

Jabronies 27, No Punt Intended 25

Frodo Swaggins 34, No Punt Intended 29

Ultimate Warriors 46, Sticky Bandits 30

3rd and Schlong 41, Frodo Swaggins 22


All We Do Is Quinn remains the class of the division, as they’ve scored a lot of points and after 6 games find themselves with a 5-1 record. Their only blemish is an extremely lucky Hail Mary score at the end of the game against Sticky Bandits. Even if Quinn won’t say it, we know they’re not thrilled that league management moved Peachy Platoon up to D2 instead of them, and the rest of D3 gets to feel that wrath. Interestingly enough, Quinn still has a difficult-ish D3 schedule ahead of them with games against Frodo, Vaspian, and No Punt Intended looming. Sticky Nation is a good place to be this season. After an off year for them in the Spring, the Bandits look just how they’re supposed to each season. A surprise loss last week to Ultimate Warriors notwithstanding, Sticky does have a win over Quinn that while many believe they “stole” at the end (they did) lets remind everyone that Sticky led for a lot of that game as well. Mike Thomas, Rags, Alex, it doesn’t matter who throws for Sticky as all of the QBs I just listed have been a part of this franchise for what feels like centuries at this point. They have talented guys and even better girls for just the perfect mixture to walk away with this one. Frodo Swaggins is one of my favorite teams, and a lot of it is just the pissing contest between Scotty Dro and Garrett Beesing. While those guys go back and forth on who’s the greatest, people forget that they possess some good female players in Emily Schilling, Kristen Daniels (until her knees give out again), and Sarah Hunt (whenever she actually shows up). Frodo isn’t exactly “underrated” anymore, as the rest of the division (and the league) is well aware of them now, but this is a team that THRIVES in the spotlight. The problem for them seems to be in the games that may not matter as much, and Frodo may just be a team that plays down to their competition. That may have even been evident last week, as Frodo beat No Punt Intended but proceeded to lose to 3rd and Schlong, who hadn’t won a game in quite some time. Jabronies find themselves in the middle of the division, right about where they should be. This team has the talent to compete with the teams above them, but mostly their fortunes rest on the arm of Joe Miano. No Punt Intended loaded up in the offseason, getting the best parts of GLBS to come play with them. They got rid of their awful camo jerseys for some hip new green ones. And one thing is for certain: They can play some defense. Scoring is slightly an issue right now, but as I’ve said before about them: If they can figure out how to score a little bit more, look out. They have the right pieces, now its just about getting them into place. They still have two “prove it” games with Sticky and Quinn remaining this season, and those two games become “must watch”. Vaspian is quickly acclimating themselves to the league, as Drew Colosimo’s new team find themselves sitting at 2-2 and looking like they belong. The fit the mold of the league’s youth movement (Peachy, Quinn, etc. Basically, young and fast) and instead of starting in a much lower division they jumped right into the fire. They have the biggest game in franchise history this weekend with a game against Quinn, which will really be a measuring stick for the new team. End Game has had an up and down season so far, but QB Dave and Brandon Farr are determined to get things going in the right direction. Speaking of going in the right direction, the Ultimate Warriors sure are. The Warriors picked up a big win over Sticky and they’re really starting to click as they build team chemistry. Scott Pinto really solidified their QB situation, and the various Lattucas on the team are there to provide cool heads (maybe) and direction. Look out for this D3 dark horse along the way. 3rd and Schlong got a win! That’s important because I was starting to get worried about them. I’ve said it about 100 times now, its better when the Keller Crew is winning. As of now they find themselves outside of the playoff race (only the Top 8 get in), but they’ve played the hardest D3 schedule to date (Quinn, Frodo, Sticky, Vaspian, and NPI) so with things getting easier as the season goes on, look for them to make a late run. Puckett All-Stars are sitting at 0-4 and really need a win or two FAST. It’s not as though they’re a bad team, they just need a little bit more of an “it” factor to really bring home some wins. Right now, it seems like they’re on their way to be watching the D3 playoffs on the couch.


Prediction: Quinn gets caught looking ahead to D2 in the Spring and blows another should be championship, this time to Frodo Swaggins in the semi-finals. Frodo then loses to Sticky Bandits who win the title, but it won’t be Scotty’s fault.


This Week’s Games:


No Punt Intended vs End Game (+6) – This is a game both teams really need. NPI dropped both parts of their doubleheader last weekend and End Game found themselves on the losing end against the upstarts from Vaspian. In this scenario, I think talent wins out. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 8


Ultimate Warriors vs 3rd and Schlong (+3) – Both teams walked away from last week with some much needed wins to get the proverbial monkeys off their backs. This isn’t exactly a “Loser Leaves Town” match just yet, but this game could mean EVERYTHING for the tiebreakers when it comes to making the playoffs or not. 3RD AND SCHLONG BY 4


Sticky Bandits vs Jabronies (+6) – This is must watch football this week. These two teams know each other very well, and from what I’ve heard from Jeff Krol on the podcast this week they’re going through with the bet Andrew asked me about a week ago. I’m still all for the jerseys. $10 a piece is worth it. I wonder what color Sticky will pick for the Jabronies? STICKY BANDITS BY 10


No Punt Intended vs Puckett All-Stars (+10) – If NPI needed the End Game contest to make it look like they belong in the championship picture, they extra need this one. They can’t afford to lose this one to Puckett, who seems stuck in 10th place this year. Puckett can’t afford to make a late charge like they did last season, so if they’re going to make a run this year, it starts now. Sadly for them, NO PUNT INTENDED BY 3


All We Do Is Quinn vs Vaspian (+7) – Being a new team in your 5th game and only being a 7 point underdog to a juggernaut like the Quinners is really indicative of how I feel about Vaspian. More than a few of my associates jumped at the chance to tell me these guys really stand out, and they’re athletic as hell. They pretty much sound like an early version of, well, All We Do Is Quinn. Big measuring stick game for Vaspian here. ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 13


Frodo Swaggins vs Jabronies (EVEN) – As much as I’d like to favor Frodo right now, I don’t know if its possible. They’re just so up and down as of late. This is a great matchup between two of the league’s best newer QBs, and even though Garrett has angrily emailed me about the issues he seems to have with his hands as of late, who would know better than his own QB? I think this game has Game of the Day potential. JABRONIES BY 4


Sticky Bandits vs Puckett All-Stars (+14) – I see no reason to continue to comment on these teams here. Sticky good, Puckett not so good. STICKY BANDITS BY 11




Odds to Win the Championship:

Matty’s Angels 2-1

Cunning Stunts 3-2

Buffalo Solar Solutions 15-1

Mountain Dew Me 20-1

Full Throttle 20-1

Uncle Rico’s 50-1


Last Week’s Games:

Buffalo Solar Solutions 41, Uncle Rico’s 34

Matty’s Angels 44, Mountain Dew Me 18


There isn’t that much to say. As much as I want to find a team to pull the upset for either dominant gender team, it just isn’t going to happen unless Matty gets heat stroke again. In late October. The Angels and the Stunts are on their way to another championship battle before both of them get knocked up (see what I did there?) to D3 in the Spring. Full Throttle currently stands in the “best non gender team in D4” role, but the rest of the season can see the standings go haywire. Luke’s team however has been improving ever so slightly each season, and while it may not be as rapid as the team would like, it should be clearly stated for the public that they’re a much better team than they used to be. Buffalo Solar is the veteran team of the division, and they really can hold their own for the most part against any of these teams. Honestly, if there was one team that could upset a gender team, its going to be them. Mountain Dew Me is another fantastic new team with youth and speed, and once they get on the right track they’re going to going to be a force in the TSL. Allegedly they were keeping the game with the Angels very close until the second half, when some rookie mistakes turned into gender points. If you can’t get a girl TD consistently against the Stunts or the Angels, you’re going to lose. Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers appear to be on the right track to figuring out what the hell went wrong in the first part of their season. While I can’t envision them making the finals of this division, I could see them beating any of the non-gender teams in the first round of the playoffs.


Prediction: Matty’s Angels plays Cunning Stunts. Stunts win again to end the Fall 2019 Season.


This Week’s Games:


Buffalo Solar Solutions vs Mountain Dew Me (+6) – BSS gives the points to the new guys, simply because they’re the veteran team. But MDM can play, and they’re FAST, according to multiple reports. MDM is looking for a signature win, and if they catch Buffalo Solar sleeping, this could be it. MOUNTAIN DEW ME BY 1


Full Throttle vs Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers (+3) – Like I said above, Full Throttle is playing better than you think football, and while Uncle Rico’s is trending upwards, for this game, it’ll just mean that they don’t get blown out. FULL THROTTLE BY 3


Matty’s Angels vs Buffalo Solar Solutions (+8) – Buffalo Solar needs to bring their A game defensively if they have any chance at defeating the Angels. The problem is that they allow 40 points a game already, so the Angels might score 60 here. MATTY’S ANGELS BY 15


Cunning Stunts vs Matty’s Angels (+1) – The Stunts are the champions, so they give the point. This game is about as even as you can get. Two dominant gender squads are going to go head to head to see who are the queens (this easily applies to Matty Ice and Joey Batts as well) of the division. The Angels are looking for a modicum of revenge from losing the title game to the Stunts. The Stunts, even with the title win, HAVE to still have the chip on their shoulder since the league still just assumes Matty’s Angels are the better team. Picking this game is foolish, but I’m going to go with THE GAME ENDS IN A 44-44 TIE.




Odds to Win the Championship:

Over Compensators 3-1

En Fuego 4-1

Practice Squad 12-1

The Field 40-1

Pink Pteratacos 1000-1


Last Week’s Games:

Practice Squad 49, Hope N Ruin 46

Come From Behind 30, Hung Buffalo 22

Over Compensators 50, Come From Behind 24

Over Compensators 58, En Fuego 28


Well, the much hyped battle between The OC and En Fuego turned out to be a bust of a game. En Fuego was thoroughly embarrassed by the Over Compensators in a crazy blowout. As a result, the OC are the clear cut favorites to take home the D5 title. They’ve been the hottest team in the league (non gender) since the middle of last season, and Larry Chrusical (spelled wrong, I’m sure) is in consideration for QB of the year. I’m sure there’s other awesome players on the team who I don’t know the names of, but congrats to the OC. Blasé LaDuca, however, is NOT in consideration for QB of the year after his dismal game where his play could not cash the checks that his mouth was writing. But fear not young Blasé! En Fuego is still a fantastic team who still wears jorts. That’s a big deal, obviously. Blasé, Frank, Keita, Jessie, and the rest of the team aren’t going to just accept this defeat. They’re going to use that loss to fuel them for the rest of the season with the goal of getting the rematch with the OC in the title game. Practice Squad continues to show that they belong in D5, as Renee and friends keep winning games and looking better each week. I don’t think they’ll be winning this title this year, but they’re a top contender for it in the spring. The middle pack of D5 is clearly a step below the top 3 teams I just mentioned. There are no shocking surprises when it comes to Hung Buffalo, Hope N Ruin, Cobblestone, and Come From Behind. These four teams are TSL institutions, and they’ve been around since forever. You know what you’re going to get from them each time they step onto the field. If you sleep on them, you can very easily lose the game, but for the most part you’re going to get a hard fought contest. That isn’t meant as a slight at all. Finally, the Pink Pteratacos are just struggling to survive at this point. I don’t know what happened to Mark’s team, but they’re looking just lost at this point. On the positive side, they have some amazing girls on the team in Talia, Marla (Maybe?), and Steph. On the negative side, the last time Mark had a talented girl in D5 that the league found out about, well, nevermind. I miss Shari too, Rameer.


Prediction: We get the Over Compensators vs En Fuego final we’re all hoping for, and while En Fuego brings it this time, they still come up just short to the OC.


This Week’s Games:


Practice Squad vs Cobblestone (+10) – If Cobblestone has League Icon QB Superstar Darryl Carr throwing the ball? PRACTICE SQUAD BY 14. If they have anyone else? PRACTICE SQUAD BY 3.


Hope N Ruin vs Pink Pteratacos (+9) – Hope N Ruin’s struggles this season look more to be internal than anything as there have been multiple reports of infighting. I can’t say whether or not that’s true, but I can say that HNR’s offense isn’t the problem so much as it’s been their defense. The Pteratacos’ problems are all about offensive woes, defensive problems, attendance, etc. It’s a rough year for the PPs. HOPE N RUIN BY 13


Hung Buffalo vs Pink Pteratacos (+15) – Same story for the Pteratacos. The difference here is that Hung Buffalo can play defense much better than HNR, so it’s only going to get harder for them this Saturday. Hung Buffalo should roll in this feel good game. HUNG BUFFALO BY 14


Hung Buffalo vs Cobblestone (+7) – This match up should be a fun one as it feels like these two teams are evenly matched. Sadly, whether or not Darryl shows up still matters. Cobblestone’s growth as a team really does feel stunted by their QB position nowadays, which was NEVER (I REPEAT: NEVER) the case before. HUNG BUFFALO BY 6




Odds To Win The Championship:


TMA 3-1

The Bi-Polar Express 4-1

pAssless Chaps 6-1

Zack Attack 7-1

Graves Bros 9-1

The Field 20-1


Last Week’s Games:

TMA 32, Blitzkrieg 31

Wild Oak Beard Co 31, Tater Tots 30

pAssless Chaps 32, The Replacements 14

The Bi-Polar Express 16, Graves Bros 16

The Replacements 29, Graves Bros 27

Zack Attack 51, Blitzkrieg 13


The three returning D6 teams from the Spring are at the forefront of this division’s championship race. I really enjoy seeing The Bi-Polar Express coming together this season, as they have been working hard as a team for the last few sessions and its finally paying off. Like most gender teams, they’ll be hard to beat now that they’re figuring out how to score. The biggest issues for them lie in the schedule, as the only team that has their own odds above that they’ve played has been Graves Bros, whom they tied 16-16 with. I gave TMA the best odds for this championship simply because when TMA meets BPX, Gordon loses 4 stud girls in Steph Czaja, Diana Bernal, Valerie Testa, and Drunk Meg. TMA will always have an advantage over BPX for that reason alone. However, as BPX has added some more stud females (Cat Peters anyone?), it softens the blow for these games. TMA has said for a while now that they needed a QB, and they found one, finally. They’re really playing to the level we’ve all come to know and expect from them, and the D6 title runs through them. pAssless Chaps, mind you, actually made the title game last season. Coach Jay has them focused and doing the right things, although their problems mostly come from execution more than anything right now. Zack Attack has a great name, and a great offense as they’ve slapped around most of the other new teams in the division so far this season. The Attack has yet to face off against TMA, the Chaps, BPX, or Graves Bros though, so while they currently sit atop the division, they have a hard road the rest of the way. Speaking of Graves Bros, they HAVE played some of the better teams in the division (although TMA didn’t have the new QB Week 1), and they sit at 2-2-1 right now. The Tater Tots sit at 1-2 on the field, but the word going around is that they’ve been winning at the bar each and every week. Drunk Meg’s Boyfriend’s Team appear to be a fun bunch that can still compete on the field. They are also in on the Tots vs Fries bet that they BETTER win because Tots are so much better. Blitzkrieg is a team that gets rave reviews, but aren’t getting the results. They lost to TMA by 1 and BPX by 3. Other than the 51-13 loss last week, Blitzkrieg has been in every game they’ve played so far, and with a few more games to get on the same page, they’re a sleeper team in the division. Wild Oak Beard Co is currently sitting at 2-2 after an 0-2 start. Things are trending up for WOBCO as they have now claimed victories over Blitzkrieg and the Tots. They’re a middle of the pack team for now, but just like anyone else in this division, the more that they play together, they better they’ll get. The Replacements are the other team that came from the 5 Star Generals divorce, and while they looked like the lesser half of that split for a minute there, they ended up beating their old mates in what HAD to be a feel good win. Their schedule is a mix of good teams (BPX, Zack Attack), middle teams (Wild Oak) and some not as good teams (Tater Tots, Shattered Dreams)  so there’s a lot of room to get some wins and make the playoffs. Our final team here is Shattered Dreams, who are currently 0-3 with losses to the Chaps, Zack Attack, and TMA. That’s a pretty hard schedule for a new team, and while their next game is against BPX, things can only get better from here on out as they get to play some of the “easier” teams down the stretch. A couple of wins can get them into the playoffs.


Prediction: TMA and Zack Attack meet up in the finals, with TMA finally completing their destiny as D6 champions.


This Week’s Games:


Blitzkrieg vs Tater Tots (+3) – If Blitzkrieg was going to start getting on the winning track, this is the time for it. The Tots might secretly be the better team here, as they have had the better defense here as well. BK might be getting the publicity, but the Tots are getting the win. TATER TOTS BY 2


TMA vs pAssless Chaps (+3) – I really hope Coach Jay can play in this game because I want both of these teams to be at full strength. I really want Brent to get a touchdown, and then cap off the season with the nicest person in the league award. TMA allows more points than the Chaps, but they definitely score more as well. TMA continues to roll. TMA BY 13


The Bi-Polar Express vs Shattered Dreams (+16) – Shattered Dreams still struggles to put the ball in the end zone, but like I’ve said so far, they’ve had the hardest schedule in D6. I feel bad giving a new team to the league a 16 point spread but its incredibly hard to keep up with the gender scoring. Some free advice: if a guy is going to score have him step out at the one yard line and bring in all of your girls. (You should have 4 for this game). Try hard for the gender score, perhaps even get a girl to throw to a tall guy. You’ll need the extra points to keep up. THE BIPOLAR EXPRESS BY 10


Zack Attack vs The Replacements (+6) – The Replacements are coming off the revenge win against Graves, but its looking like the Attack is another animal. The Attack can score in bunches and sadly, the Replacements tend to allow a good amount of points. ZACK ATTACK BY 15


The Bi-Polar Express vs Zack Attack (EVEN) – Big, big game for both of these teams. BPX will be without Cat Peters (who has been great for them) as she’ll have a Quinn game at the same time. Such is the life of the gender squad. This game is for leadership of the division for the most part, and the Attack, like we said, can definitely score. I’m not entirely sure the girls on BPX will have a way to cover Zack Elphick (the only person on the team I know), which could mean disaster for them. ZACK ATTACK BY 10


Graves Bros vs Wild Oak Beard Co (+2) – WOBCO is trending up, as I said earlier. Graves Bros is a good team for sure, but the loss to The Replacements might have them reeling a little bit. Look for a bit of a surprise here. WILD OAK BEARD CO BY 7





1.       Are you wearing sunscreen? Seriously, its going to be 80 degrees again. Use protection so you don’t have all of your faces burned again, you fools.


2.       How will Topper not being at the fields affect the shenanigans that could occur? Shenanigans will be kept at a minimum, seriously. If you think for one second that Rameer isn’t going to be prowling every inch of the fields making sure of it, you’ve got another thing coming.



3.       What’s the game of the day this week? Cunning Stunts vs Matty’s Angels should be EVERYONE’S PRIORITY this weekend, but if you want a backup pick, I’d go check out Sticky Bandits vs Jabronies.


4.       I didn’t ask for mailbag questions, but I got one anyway: “Good Evening Godfather, In your name I pray. I pray for my family and friends to remain in good health. I pray to marry Casey on AWDIQ. Lastly, I pray the downfall of Joey Batts continues. It’s time for him to find a new hobby. With that being said, here’s one for your mailbag this week: Does Joey Batts win one game in D1 all year? – Scotty D.” Thank you for the email Scotty. To answer your question: As much as I want to say yes, it doesn’t seem likely. They only have 2 games remaining this season: This week against Eyes Downtown, and next week against Tight Ends In Motion. ED is the best team in the division currently, and TEIM has defeated Gryffindor 75 – 15 in their two meetings this season. I want Joey to win one, as he’s a fantastic human being and all, but that’s a tough hill to climb.


5.       Are you reading all of the other stuff we have to offer? If you’re coming to the website to read my article (which is obviously the best thing on the site), stick around and read the other stuff too!! Rameer’s Rant, The Sentinel and the Power Rankings are awesome! Listen to Joe K and Emily Curry’s TSL podcast! Get involved! This league is so much better when you do!





1.       Things I miss from the TSL: #XTC, Indecent Exposure, vandalay industries, Dave Walter.


2.       Here’s the “Go to” viewing for your Saturday:


a.       10:00 – Tater Tots vs Blitzkrieg – Field 5

b.      11:00 – TMA vs pAssless Chaps – Field 5

c.       12:00 – Marketing Mayors vs Public Enemy – Field 2

d.      1:00 – Cunning Stunts vs Matty’s Angels – Field 3 (should be moved to Field 1)

e.      2:00 – Frodo Swaggins vs Jabronies – Field 3

f.        3:00 – Cobblestone vs Hung Buffalo – Field 2


3.       The more DJ Jimmy shows up and plays music, the more people really enjoy themselves.


4.       We really need to start hearing from more of these new teams. The “new stars” I was talking about seem to be on Vaspian and Mountain Dew Me based on what I was told. Looking forward to learning more about them on other articles/emails/podcasts.



5.       Remember, if you’re having trouble fielding a team for your game (it happens to everyone at some point), don’t forfeit, and don’t play with 5 people. There’s the Universal Sub List that was created FOR THIS REASON. If there was confusion, using a player from the USL does NOT count as one of your 4 sub allowances for the season, and there’s plenty of good people on that list to fill in for you that are willing.


6.       Shout out to Travis Clev for his first “Tito’s with Travis!” Go watch it on our facebook page!


7.       We really should’ve had Breakfast Club this fall. Maybe we should do a mini-morning tourney? Drafts are fun. Or perhaps we do a blind draw? That could be something too.


8.       The TSL is in dire need of its 4th gender team. We have WAY too many women out there who aren’t playing for one of the three we currently have. They’d be competitive right away.



9.       A current point of contention is the “IS THIS LEGAL” play where, at the 1 yard line, a girl puts her feet in the end zone, lays on the ground (passing the dog toy so the other team can’t get to her hands), and the QB places the ball in her hands for a score. Some think it isn’t a touchdown, but I got clarification, and I’ve got some news for you: It counts as a score. Clearly, the rulebook will be altered this offseason to address this new issue, but I’ve got to tell you, some of you need better things to do than to come up with this nonsense. Sheesh. Get a hobby.


10.   Word got back to me that after I posted my Week 1 article where I invited the Wanderers to come from Game On! and try their hand here in the TSL, an unnamed person passed along that invitation to the team. We have yet to get a response. Interesting.



Week 5 is here Ladies and Gents! The race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality is heating up, and the contenders and the pretenders are getting sorted out a little more each and every week! Which one are you? Have fun and be safe!

Week 3 thoughts, picks, and predictions

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Thursday, 05 September 2019 12:38
Published: Thursday, 05 September 2019 12:38
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 2290


Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, lend me your ears.


For it is in this very league, that one of life’s greatest wars will be played out on the battlefield in a few short weeks.


Tots. Vs. Fries.


As the great philosopher Road Dogg Jesse James once said: “Oh you didn’t know?”. Let me tell you. Our lovely little league can, at times, really turn a negative into a positive. For clarity’s sake, I’ll give you the full rundown. In Week 1, pAssless chaps were all set to play the Tater Tots in a D6 contest. The Chaps, however, could not field a team and gave the TSL brain trust (Okay, it was just Topper, and describing him as a “brain trust” is truly terrifying) more than enough notice to move the game. The Tots, at first, thought they were given the option to reschedule the game for later in the season or take the forfeit. In a very weak move (that would’ve garnered some serious shaming by yours truly I may add), the Tots asked for the victory when they didn’t like the idea of potentially playing the make up game later in the season, when it would be presumably colder and less “good weather-y”. A fair assumption, but a very weak move. Topper dropped the hammer almost instantaneously, informing them they have to play the game, since the Chaps gave more than enough notice on the need for a reschedule. And then, something beautiful blossomed.


In a fun email chain between the captains, Topper, and myself pAsseless Captain Shawn declared #FriesAreBetter. How he could think that was beyond me (they aren’t), but not only did the teams agree to the new game date (Week 7 at 3:00) we have our first major bet of the season that the loser will buy the winner some delicious food. If the Tots win, pAssless will buy them Tater Tots. If the Chaps win, a couple of large fries will be sent the Chaps’ way. The teams will have to pose together with the winning potato choice to show their D6 Unity, and all will be good with the world.


We have our first bet of the Fall 2019 season, and it’s a fun one. Who can top it?


(If I wasn’t clear: Tots are better.)


Let’s get into this week’s fun!




Last Week’s Games:

Public Enemy 29, Gryffindor 28

Eyes Downtown 36, Tight Ends in Motion 32

Eyes Downtown 44, Bullet Club 0 (D1/D2 Crossover)

Gryffindor 42, Dilfs 38 (D1/D2 Crossover)


Well, last week I definitely said “Let’s see if Gryffindor learned anything from last week” and it goes to show you that they sure as hell did. PE and Gryffindor put on a 10:00 show that featured scoring, end of game excitement (I’m pretty confident that Gryffindor went for two at the end of the game to go for the win and didn’t get it, I could be wrong though), and even a couple of people laying on the ground a few times (Mike Boccio and Amanda Werth, I believe). These two teams really put it on the line and it seems a fun rivalry may be brewing. Eyes Downtown used their light workout against Bullet Club to make sure they were ready for their real game against TEIM. It looked like it helped just enough as Bobby and Co walked away with a hard fought 4 point victory.


This Week’s Games:


Eyes Downtown vs Gryffindor (+7) – I’m not entirely sure which Gryffindor we’re going to get here. ED seems to be rolling now (after I talked about how they felt off last week, naturally). While both teams had close D1 games last week, ED murdered Bullet Club whereas Gryffindor had to fight to beat the Dilfs. The spread feels right, but one has to wonder if Eyes Downtown is looking past this game to the bigger battle against Public Enemy. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 6


Eyes Downtown vs Public Enemy (EVEN) – IT’S ON!!!! But, does anybody really care anymore? The anger, the vitriol, the absolute bitter “I truly hate this other team” attitude that both of these teams have for each other seems to have calmed down a little bit from what it used to be. Yes, both of these teams don’t like each other. No, they won’t hug. Yes, they’ll smack talk. But will it be the ‘MUST SEE TV’ it’s been in the past? YES. YES IT WILL. GET THREE REFS FOR THIS GAME. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 2


Marketing Mayors vs Gryffindor (+10) – In case anyone forgot, the D1 champs don’t wear red. They’re back after a week off and they’re looking to get a taste of Gryffindor. I’m not sure that, across the board, Batts and Co can keep up. MARKETING MAYORS BY 13


Marketing Mayors vs Tight Ends In Motion (+7) – Tight Ends had a heck of a good game against Eyes Downtown but they just couldn’t quite get the victory. That’ll happen. Next up for them is an even better team in the Mayors, and TEIM will need all of their horses to have their ducks in a row. Or something. MARKETING MAYORS BY 7




Last Week’s Games:

Bullet Club 34, We Back 8

Team Topper 49, Energy Buff 8

A&A 32, Peachy Platoon 28*

Slytherin That End Zone 37, Dilfs 36

A&A 34, Energy Buff 26


Am I supposed to feel bad for Peachy Platoon here? Look, I get it. They lost a game that, if the TSL had instant replay (Topper, where ARE the drones anyway?) it’d be overturned. But this is the TSL and even though Peachy appealed the call (Good on Topper for sticking to the results), things like this sometimes happen. Human error will always be a factor in ANY Social Co-Ed sport. Peachy is more than fine. They’re young, hyper athletic, all of them are some sort of handsome/beautiful (this includes the Team Parents on the sidelines, like, what a gene pool they have going over there, seriously), talented, and they’re some of the nicest people around. Plus, everyone makes the playoffs in D2, so the Platoon can just sit back and use this game as inspiration to get even better. I don’t know when it’s going to happen, but A&A vs Peachy Platoon Round 2 is coming. Hold onto your butts. You know who else is pretty good? Slytherin That End Zone. They’re sitting at 2-1 when they could be 3-0 if they pulled out the win against Peachy. They made a comeback against Bullet Club and now they’ve pulled off a 1 point win against the Dilfs. I think its finally fair to say that they deserve some respect, which almost guarantees them a huge disappointing loss this week. Team Topper (HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO) casually rolled Energy Buff with no issue. Bullet Club beat up on a shorthanded “We Back” team that seems to have forgotten to tell themselves that they’re “Back”, since they’ve yet to roll out a full team yet this season.


This Week’s Games:


We Back (+20) vs A&A – This is the biggest line I’ve ever given out I think. But it’s warranted. We Back has seemed to grossly overestimate their talents and has D4 written all over them for the Spring. Can Matty cover the spread? It’ll be interesting to see if he gets his full team here this week, but this one could be over very early. A&A BY 21


HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO vs Bullet Club (+13) – Bullet Club would be the story of how bad things can be going in D2 for a team if We Back and Energy Buff didn’t exist. While they were 19 seconds away from being 2-2, it doesn’t seem quite like they can keep up with the “Should be in D1 and its messing up the divisions a little bit” teams like PP, A&A, and well, Team Topper. Team Topper is a D2 team in a D1 team’s body, and that doesn’t bode well for the Club. Future D2 MVP Topper rolls. HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO BY 17


Dilfs (+10) vs Peachy Platoon – I think I’m being nice with this line. The Dilfs are a good team, don’t get me wrong, but they’re the first team to get to play the “chip on our shoulder” version of Peachy Platoon. Plus, the problem with specifically being an “Old Guy and Travis” team, is that they lack some overall team speed. Peachy, does not struggle with that issue. This could be a track meet for the Platoon. PEACHY PLATOON BY 10




Last Week’s Games:

Jabronies 41, Puckett All-Stars 28

End Game 29, Ultimate Warriors 23

All We Do Is Quinn 45, Puckett All-Stars 14

No Punt Intended 32, Vaspian 14

Sticky Bandits 39, All We Do Is Quinn 37

No Punt Intended 33, 3rd and Schlong 19

Frodo Swaggins 30, Vaspian 26


All We Do Is Quinn (better known as Peachy Platoon’s little brothers) lost a HEARTBREAKER to Sticky Bandits this week. They had the highest of highs with a last second TD to take the lead after trailing the entire game. And then they give up the Hail Mary TD to blow it. And they wonder why they weren’t moved up a division? That can’t happen. No Punt Intended showed up with fresh new jerseys and a much better on field product. They cruised to two wins and have made an early claim to be in the title picture here. Rough day for Vaspian, but getting NPI and Frodo in a doubleheader is no easy task for a newer team. I still have faith in this squad. If NPI and Frodo is a bad draw, how about getting Quinn and Jabronies? Puckett may have gone 0-2, but if they can make a few necessary adjustments they’ll be okay in this division. Speaking of Jabronies, so far so good for them as they made the jump to D3. 1-0-1 is a good start. End Game squeaked out a win against the Warriors, who were a bad throw or two away from taking this one.


This Week’s Games:


Ultimate Warriors (+10) vs All We Do Is Quinn – These teams played each other a few times not too long ago at the end of last season. Quinn was pretty dominant in those contests, and even though the Warriors have a QB now, I don’t think he’s the difference maker in this one. ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 14


End Game vs Puckett All-Stars (EVEN) – A fun rematch from last season’s D4 playoffs that saw Puckett knock off the heavily favored End Game en route to their championship. There’s no way End Game didn’t spend all summer preparing for revenge. Here’s hoping Puckett brings the entire team and we see another awesome battle. END GAME BY 1


Sticky Bandits vs 3rd And Schlong (+8) – “Dad? Dad, come on. You’ve gotta get up.” – Simba, The Lion King. Whenever I see “3rd and Schlong” lately, that’s exactly how I feel. My mind races to Simba trying to wake up Mufasa after he’s died. And I feel like I’m Simba here, just trying to wake 3AS up. The TSL is a better place when they’re good. Sticky, however, IS good. They’re playing the kind of football they’re accustomed to, and the wins are following. This is a game of two teams trending in different ways. STICKY BANDITS BY 10


Jabronies (+3) vs All We Do Is Quinn – The first big test for Joe Miano and his various Klecklers comes this week in the form of Peachy Platoon’s JV squad. The Quinners are NO slouches, and with Sticky surprising them last week, they’re going to be on their toes not to be upset again. This battle should be a very good one. ALL WE DO IS QUINN BY 4




Last Week’s Games:

Full Throttle 50, Buffalo Solar Solutions 30

Matty’s Angels 64, Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers 6

Cunning Stunts 49, Mountain Dew Me 22


Let’s give a shout out to Full Throttle! That’s a big win for them, its showing that they’re improving each session. I still don’t know if they have what it takes to beat one of the gender teams, but it’s a start! As much as I want to rag on Uncle Rico’s for getting mauled, I’m not going to. Word is they were missing some stars, and on top of it all, I kind of said this was going to happen. The Angels are mad, look out. Meanwhile, in other gender team news, the Stunts showed up and looked like they’re in midseason form. Many reports suggest Mountain Dew Me shows lots of promise however, and I’m looking forward to seeing how they progress.


This Week’s Games:


Matty’s Angels vs Full Throttle (+14) – Full Throttle is improving, but this is the litmus test for the division. All roads to the D4 title lead here. MATTY’S ANGELS BY 14


Mountain Dew Me (+7) vs Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers – It’ll be interesting to see how URTT looks when they trot out the entire squad. MDM isn’t a team they can sleep on it seems, so this game will give us the real look at how Rico’s matches up this session. UNCLE RICO’S TIME TRAVELERS BY 7


Buffalo Solar Solutions (+8) vs Cunning Stunts – I’m not entirely sure how Buffalo Solar lost to Full Throttle by 20 last week, so I’m going to assume they’ll be a little better this week. The Stunts have two games this week, and with Joey already having two before that, there’s a chance his arm falls off. CUNNING STUNTS BY 7


Cunning Stunts vs Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers (+8) – Seriously, by Game 4 of the day, Joey’s arm may actually fall off. That’s perfect timing for an Uncle Rico’s squad that’s looking to make a mark in the division. I still think the girls pull this out though. CUNNING STUNTS BY 3




Last Week’s Games:

En Fuego 32, Hope N Ruin 20

Practice Squad 34, Come From Behind 32

Over Compensators 44, Hung Buffalo 27

Practice Squad 32, Hung Buffalo 27


En Fuego gets all of the credit in the world for two things: having fun and wearing jorts. If they’re going to hide themselves in D5, the least they can do is be fun and not troublemakers. An easy win against Hope N Ruin for them. PRACTICE SQUAD! The D6 champs continue looking right at home in the division, going 2-0 this week, and find themselves at 3-0 overall. But they’re only second in the division because the Over Compensators are continuing the hot streak they started in the spring. D5 is really shaping up as the best division in terms of “who the hell is going to win this one?”. The games are close, and fun.


This Week’s Games:


Hung Buffalo vs Hope N Ruin (+3) – Both of these teams need to come out with a win, as they sit at 0-2 on the season. Hung Buffalo hung in there this week against Practice Squad and the OC, and with word from the fields coming in that HNR is already fighting internally, look for Hung Buffalo to take this one. HUNG BUFFALO BY 7


Cobblestone (+7) vs Come From Behind – CFB almost pulled off the win against Practice Squad, but they came up short. Just when they need a win, the fates send them Cobblestone. This game is going to be a close one. COME FROM BEHIND BY 3


Practice Squad vs En Fuego (EVEN) – Practice Squad has shown enough this early in the season to be considered even with En Fuego. Blasé and his team should be running away with this division, but this is really their first test to see just how ahead of the rest of the contenders they are. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 2


Over Compensators vs Pink Pteratacos (+8) – The OC is really rolling in this division right now, and they’re looking to keep their hot streak going against a Pteratacos team that can really make a mark of their own in the division this week with a big doubleheader. If the Pteratacos want to be taken seriously as a D5 title contender, this is the game they’re going to need to win. OVER COMPENSATORS BY 6


En Fuego vs Pink Pteratacos (+10) – On the back end of a doubleheader for both teams, this game could loom large for them, especially if En Fuego loses to Practice Squad. Both teams could be looking at avoiding going 0-2 on the day, which (considering the sometimes volatile personalities on either side) could lead to some fireworks. EN FUEGO BY 7




Last Week’s Games:

Blitzkrieg 42, The Replacements 30

Tater Tots 40, Zack Attack 18

The Bi-Polar Express 50, Wild Oak Beard Co. 8

Zack Attack 61, Shattered Dreams 20

TMA 46, Shattered Dreams 6

Graves Bros 20, pAssless Chaps 13


The Bi-Polar Express keeps chugging along here, as Gordon and the girls find themselves at 2-0 and on top of the division. This is the best start in the team’s short history, and it looks like they’re finally figuring things out. The Tots showed up and blew out Zack Attack, establishing early dominance in the division where nobody really knows who’s going to be good or bad just yet. Zack Attack would go onto to bludgeon Shattered Dreams, who had what we’ll nicely call “a rough first day at the office” after a not so nice game against TMA either. Graves Bros stuck their flag in the ground and showed the division that they’re going to be a force to be reckoned with this season, earning a win over D6 title favorite pAssless Chaps. And Blitzkrieg showed that it wasn’t a fluke they hung with BPX last week, earning their first win in the TSL.


This Week’s Games:


Blitzkrieg vs Wild Oak Beard Co (+10) – One team lost to BPX by 3, the other lost to them by 42. Since I don’t know too much about either team, that’s all I have to go on. It appears, based solely on these few facts that I know, that Blitzkrieg is probably a bit better. BLITZKRIEG BY 8


pAssless Chaps vs Shattered Dreams (+13) - Shattered Dreams were exactly that for themselves last week, as they lost their two games by a combined 107-26. While it’s not unheard of for a brand new team to struggle, that may have been a little overboard. The Chaps are also coming off a loss to Graves Bros, but with Coach Jay at the helm of this ship, you know they’re going to rebound and learn from it. PASSLESS CHAPS BY 10


The Bi-Polar Express vs Tater Tots (+6) – Word has trickled in that Gordon will be out this week, which means Non-Award Winning Tommy Hughes will step in for him at QB. The Tater Tots were impressive in their win last week, but the real story here is Drunk Meg taking on Drunk Meg’s Boyfriend With The Beard in this contest. THE BIPOLAR EXPRESS BY 8


The Replacements (+9) vs TMA – TMA has a QB and all seems right with the world. I’ve said it before, when TMA is happy, and they’re on, look out. This isn’t to say Ferger was the worst QB of all time or anything like that, but when you improve at the most important position AND you get Ferger out there to be a receiver as well, good things happen. The Replacements (not to be confused with The Replacements from a few seasons ago) seem to be figuring things out still, and they’re getting TMA at the wrong time. TMA by 10


Zack Attack (+7) vs Graves Bros – Graves Bros are looking strong out of the gate in D6, but not to be out done, so are Zack Attack. The two new teams are a combined 4-1 on this young season, so this is a pretty early “high profile” matchup. While a loss for either team shouldn’t hurt their playoff chances, this is a really good marker to see just where both teams stand in the division. GRAVES BROS BY 5




1.      Can Public Enemy and Eyes Downtown recapture the true rivalry hate that we’ve come to know and love? The game is still a must watch, for sure.


2.      How will Joey Batts hold up? Our tiny hero has four games this week, and one has to assume that he’s going to be exhausted by the day’s end.



3.      What’s the deal with the referees? Rameer’s rant was pretty clear on this, but I’ll reiterate that your comments have been heard, and the issues with refereeing are being dealt with behind the scenes. When you have an issue with anything in this league, find your nearest Topper, Rameer, Joe K, Val, Emily, etc and let them know asap.


4.      Will there be music again? It was AWESOME to hear that DJ Jimmy showed up to the fields to play music again just like it was back in the day. Here’s hoping that keeps up.



5.      Have you taken advantage of the TSL Specials at the Rose Garden? After many years of clamoring for some, the league has finally gotten what they’ve been asking for. Go get those wings and drinks people!




1.      It’d be really cool if B’s Brother would show up to the fields sometime soon. Honestly, there’s so many new teams that haven’t had the honor of getting to meet a living TSL Hall of Famer that really should.


2.      Shout out to Emily Curry, who was reportedly walking around the fields this week with a notebook in order to write down cool things to talk about on the TSL Podcast with Joe K this week. She’s going the extra mile it seems and deserves some credit. Looking forward to hearing it.


3.      Here’s my guide to the best games at each time:


a.      10:00 – Field 4 – Hung Buffalo vs Hope N Ruin

b.      11:00 – Field 2 – End Game vs Puckett All-Stars

c.       12:00 – Field 1 – Eyes Downtown vs Public Enemy

d.      1:00 – Field 3 – Practice Squad vs En Fuego

e.      2:00 – Field 2 – Jabronies vs All We Do Is Quinn


4.      Thank you to the few of you that have emailed me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. ! Its been great getting to know a few new people of the league. Please, shoot me an email if you want some publicity.


5.      With the championships happening on October 26, there’s slight murmuring of the return of the Halloween Costume Drunk Bowl for an after party…



6.      I’ll say this for Rameer: Don’t bother trying to get on the Universal Sub List, its basically set in stone as it is, and its NOT a way to get people an extra game. Each week people ask me if they can get on it as though I have any say in that. I don’t, and you won’t.


7.      The world is a better place when people like Award Winning Tommy Hughes, Dave Walter, and Paul Scinta are at the fields constantly. WHERE ARE THEY?



8.      It was good to see that the TSL pulled off a ridiculous 24 person fantasy football draft (It would’ve been nice to be a part of, by the way) chock full of a lot of the league’s biggest characters. There was even a really cool looking championship belt for it. Props to everyone that took part in it, as it’s yet another reason that the TSL is more than just a football league, it’s a family.


9.      We may have to start taking applications for the Banquet Committee. Lenny was such a huge part of our annual tradition’s success and there’s no one person that can just show up and fill his shoes when it comes to that. I’m pretty confident Topper isn’t going to be able to do it all himself, so we’ll have to be there for him. If you want in on this adventure and are willing to help with it, email me and we’ll get this started.



10.   Seriously though, Tots > Fries.


And with that, we’re on to Week 3. Be responsible, have fun out there, and treat everyone with respect. The league’s script is unfolding before your very eyes, pay attention to it all, there’s lots of great football being playing in every single division. What crazy turn will it take this week? I don’t know but I can’t wait to hear about it.


Great catch, Taylor Pagano.

The Godfather week 4 picks, thoughts, predictions and stuff..

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 13 September 2019 16:35
Published: Friday, 13 September 2019 16:35
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 2318


Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, somehow, some way, we are currently staring down Week 4 of the Fall 2019 Season in the face. It feels like we just got this show started, yet here we are, right smack dab in the middle of it all!


It’s an exciting time, for sure. The “haves” and “have nots” of this session’s story are really starting to show who they are. There are new, exciting developments all over the place in this league, across all of our divisions. It feels like maybe, just maybe, you’re all starting to “get it”. We’ve had a season (so far) of mostly drama free entertainment. The games have been awesome. There are new faces all over the place. The bar, as of press time, doesn’t hate our guts. Topper isn’t pulling out his hair. That weird vein isn’t popping out of Rameer’s forehead. And, we have some fun bets on games which is always important for this league.


This week, I wanted some questions from YOU, the TSL. I decided to rip off the standard “mailbag” idea many writers use when talking about less entertaining leagues like the NFL or NBA. Topper graciously posted something on the league’s Facebook page, and that got me a few questions in my inbox, and one on the post itself.


So without further ado, I give you the FIRST edition of The Godfather’s Mailbag!


The first question came from the aforementioned Facebook post and its from our very own Joe K:


“Dear Godfather, With (Non Award Winning) Thomas Hughes leading the Bi-Polar Express to a rousing 54-28 victory in Gordon Kus’ absence, should the BPX consider making a full time change? Is there a QB Controversy here? – Joe K”


In short, ABSOLUTELY NOT. While I’m sure Joe K is just trying to irk his Bullet Club teammate, Gordon and the girls on BPX have been making strides the last few sessions, and there’s zero reason for there to be a change. It’s been pretty cool watching them grow together and now they’re starting to really put things together. They’re a legit D6 title contender, and they’re secretly the most fun gender team to watch right now.


Scott Drosendahl then dropped by with a few questions for my article this week as well.


1.      “Dear Godfather, is it plausible to request several off duty officers to detail both Frodo games this weekend at 2 and 3pm? They will be needed to restrain Garrett after I boycott throwing to him in each game. – Garrett’s QB”


No sir, it isn’t plausible. First off, you could take him in a fight, so it doesn’t matter. Secondly, he gets winded too easily now so just have him run two more go routes on the last two plays of the game and he’ll be too busy trying to breathe than he would be trying to attack you.


2.      “Dear Godfather, I will be debuting my Coach Orgeron shirt this weekend when I take the field. It was drunkenly ordered last Friday night, called “Hold That Tiger”. After (defeating) both teams this coming Saturday may I request consideration for the TSL Top Ten QBs? It’s understood that 30 points per game will not cut it, but may I add that Garrett has dropped 3 TDs thus far in the season (league leading) after pledging no drops to his name of all things! Being penalized for his poor play is blasphemy and I vow to branch off and make my own team to rival those in the D1 ranks next Spring. I don’t ask God for a lighter load, just for a stronger back. In your name I pray #godfather”


This mailbag idea has already paid off. There’s a lot to unpack with this one. First off, I enjoy the Garrett bashing. I hadn’t realized he lead the league in dropped touchdowns! Secondly, Scotty sent me the picture of the shirt he bought, and its very Lion King-esque. Third, Scotty, you’re MORE than welcome to get a D1 team for the Spring next fall, just do me a favor and don’t “accidentally” sign up for D2 and blame Topper that you’re not in D1. Finally, and this is the most important one, you’re already in strong consideration for the Top 10 it seems. I don’t have a thing to do with the QB Rankings team, but in the most recent article they listed you specifically as a contender. Just get Garrett some stick ‘em for his hands, and sling it this Saturday.


3.      “Dear Godfather, who’s the better QB? Matty Ice or Chris “Cowboy” Cole?

Sincerely, Garrett’s QB”


The thing here is that Matty Ice would be the first one to tell you that it’s Chris Cole. And its not even close. Cole is one of, if not THE, best QB in the history of the TSL. If we ever opened a TSL Hall of Fame, Cole would be a first ballot player. Thanks for the question, but this isn’t even a question.


Finally, this week, our last question comes from Andrew Kicak titled “Crazy Bet”:


“Dear Godfather, what would be an appropriate bet for the Jabronies vs Sticky Bandits game on September 21st? -An Anxious Sticky Bandit”


This is what I’m talking about. From what I know, these two teams are “friends” of sorts. They’re all intertwined in some way that I don’t remember but they’re probably just all Dave Baker’s kids. Anyway, the two teams in question here, in my opinion, aren’t going anywhere. They’ll both be playing in the TSL in the Spring of 2020. (It’s weird to write 2020, by they way.) So I give you both: Jersey Bet. The winners get to design the losers jerseys for the Spring session. You can’t change the team name, but you get to pick the new color and you get to pick a nickname for each player on the jersey.


If that’s not good enough: Jeff Krol’s beard vs. Eric Kleckler’s hair. Loser shaves on the fields after the game.


Those two should qualify. Good luck Andrew.


Thanks to the few people who sent me some questions. If you’d like me to answer any of YOUR questions, feel free to email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .


And with that, let’s get to the games!




Last Week’s Games:

Eyes Downtown 48, Gryffindor 45

Eyes Downtown 23, Public Enemy 16

Marketing Mayors 46, Gryffindor 41

Marketing Mayors 30, Tight Ends in Motion 29


I’m proud of you Joey Batts. After Week 1, it seemed like you were going to get washed away in D1 this session but you’ve rallied your team and have shown that you belong. Okay, granted, you’re 1-5 on the season and the victory was in your D2 crossover game, but these close single-digit losses are still much better than things looked earlier on. Keep that up. The Marketing Mayors continue to win themselves and right now they’re on the collision course with Eyes Downtown for the D1 title. Tight Ends In Motion are competing each week but just can’t seem to get over that hump against any of the “Big 3” in the division. But is there a Big 3? Public Enemy just lost to Eyes Downtown and they seem off of sorts. They need to get their swagger back, and soon, or else we’re going to be reverting back to the offseasons where we hear consistent rumors of Boccio, Paul, and Osika leaving the team and going elsewhere and that PE is cooked.


This Week’s Games:


Marketing Mayors vs Public Enemy (+6) – If PE is going to right the ship, this is the week to do it. A killer double header is on the horizon this week and first up is a D1 title rematch against the current “best team in the TSL” and the ones who broke the streak in the Marketing Mayors. MARKETING MAYORS BY 7


Eyes Downtown vs Public Enemy (+6) ­– After writing last week that this rivalry was on it’s way out, I’m glad to hear reports that everyone still hates everyone and now PE is looking to get revenge on Bobby and Beth from last week’s loss. Fireworks may fly here. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 4


Tight Ends In Motion vs Gryffindor (+3) – The “other two” teams in the division square off in what should be a very entertaining contest. I’m well aware that the last time these two met, Tight Ends was winning 35-0 before the game was called 13 minutes early, but Gryffindor has been a completely different team since then. Look for them to get revenge here. GRYFFINDOR BY 3




Last Week’s Games:

A&A 43, We Back 14


Peachy Platoon 31, Dilfs 29


I’m incredibly angry that I wasn’t given the proper heads up to hype the hell out of a Topper vs Joe K quarterback battle. Not that it looked like it really mattered, as Bullet Club’s consistent roster woes showed up yet again. At the very least, they were the first team to slow down Topper’s offense. A&A came in and just does what they do. We Back had to trot out 3 girls and 3 guys this week, and quite frankly need to find people that actually show up. The Dilfs came out and battled the “Youngins” hard. Peachy really had the game in hand but instead got cocky and it almost cost them. They’re going to learn from that mistake for sure.


This Week’s Games:


HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO vs Slytherin That End Zone (+7) – SITE is a sneaky good team that nobody is really talking about. Did everyone forget that they won D3 last season? But in reality, SITE’s plan of “go down a lot of points early and make a comeback” just isn’t going to work against Team Topper. They need to come out swinging early, and I’m not sure they’re equipped for that against the HB Defense. TEAM TOPPER BY 10


A&A vs Bullet Club (+8) – A&A and Bullet Club take the field for this session’s installment of the rivalry. Eyes will always be on Matty and Gordon but these two teams are always competitive against each other. The biggest question, for both sides, is who’s going to show up? If both teams field full rosters, this could be a doozy. A&A BY 10


A&A vs Slytherin That End Zone (+7) – The second game for both teams on the day. It’ll be interesting to see how SITE matches up against Matty and his arsenal of weapons. The biggest problem for SITE might be that Newman keeps letting Maggie sack him just so she touches him. Either way, expect both teams to play hard as this is a pretty big game in terms of seeding. A&A BY 6


Peachy Platoon vs Energy Buff (+16) – Energy Buff has talent, and occasionally they have the athletes to run with Peachy. But in reality, Peachy boasts better girls, better guys, a better QB, better defense, and better fans. On top of it, Peachy almost blew last week’s game so they’re going to stay on top of it this week. All of that adds up to a frustrating day for the Buff. PEACHY PLATOON BY 17


Peachy Platoon vs We Back (+30) – I don’t feel bad about this. I don’t think there’s a number high enough for me to consider not betting Peachy Platoon here. We Back has some great people on the team but again, they’re a few divisions too high, Sal is injured (Get well soon man), and there’s ZERO guarantee they’ll have 6 players. Universal Sub List players might run away from playing in this one. PEACHY PLATOON BY INFINITY


Dilfs vs We Back (+20) – The Dilfs played a great game last week. Travis is actually pretty underrated as a defender at times, because the league is still too concerned as to why someone who is so good at QB avoids it so much. Ironically, Travis may have to be the QB for the Dilfs soon. Of course, against We Back, they may as well get Val some practice instead. DILFS BY 21




Last Week’s Games:

All We Do Is Quinn 44, Ultimate Warriors 30

End Game 20, Puckett All-Stars 19

Sticky Bandits 48, 3rd and Schlong 42

All We Do Is Quinn 38, Jabronies 29


All We Do Is Quinn is good. Understand that people. I know, they’re no Peachy Platoon, but they’re the overlords of D3 and assuming they don’t screw it up again, they’ll be the D3 champions. They’re a Sticky Bandits Hail Mary away from being 6-0. The Topper Rankings system has them the number 1 team in the league. Get used to them. This week it was the Ultimate Warriors (who are familiar with Quinn anyway) and the Jabronies (who put up a good fight for sure) who had to deal with them. End Game got a smidge of revenge against Puckett in a one point victory, and I really hope that game was as awesome and it seems like it may have been. Here’s a budding rivalry for sure, though I hope Puckett can string some wins together soon for another playoff showdown between these two. Sticky is chugging along with yet another victory, and they really seem to be firing on all cylinders this time around. 3rd and Schlong just need to figure out how defense works and they’ll start winning themselves.


This Week’s Games:


End Game vs Vaspian (+3) -  I’m still trying to get a handle on Vaspian right now. They seem like a decent team that could be on End Game’s level in the division but there isn’t enough data for me to really know. I do know that End Game is talented and they’re a great team when they’re on the same page. END GAME BY 3


Jabronies vs No Punt Intended (EVEN) – This should be a great game. The Jabronies have jumped into D3 with no problem, and to be honest, so have No Punt Intended. Both teams are similar and both teams added some really big free agents in the offseason. They kind of mirror each other, and it’ll be interesting to see who comes out on top. I expect a very close game. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 1


Sticky Bandits vs Ultimate Warriors (+6) – This season is already going better for the Ultimate Warriors, but they just can’t find the consistency they desire. As I said earlier, it seems that Sticky has everything going their way for the first time in a while and it really feels like they’re just rolling right now. STICKY BANDITS BY 8


No Punt Intended vs Frodo Swaggins (EVEN) – Scotty called his shot earlier in the article, but No Punt Intended is the better team. This game is going to go back and forth for sure, but it seems like Frodo’s QB doesn’t trust his aging star receiver’s hands as much as he should This game is going to be fun, but look for NPI to win this one. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 1


Frodo Swaggins vs 3rd and Schlong (+9) -  3AS does need to figure out defense, as I said earlier, and fast. If Frodo loses to NPI, they’re going to be heated about it, and I think they’re going to try to run up the score here. 3AS will be able to score themselves, it’ll just depend on if they can keep up. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 7




Last Week’s Scores:

Matty’s Angels 60, Full Throttle 32

Mountain Dew Me 61, Uncle Rico’s 19

Cunning Stunts 36, Buffalo Solar Solutions 25

Cunning Stunts 52, Uncle Rico’s 27


Ho hum. Matty’s wins. Whatever. The Stunts win. Whatever. Enjoy D3 next Spring. Uncle Rico’s is really underperforming after having a fantastic session in the Spring. Full Throttle may have gotten slapped around by Matty’s Angels BUT there’s a lot of good going on for them in the season. They still scored 32 points and they’re showing improvement. HOW ABOUT MOUNTAIN DEW ME DROPPING 61 POINTS THIS WEEK? Congrats to our new team (At least, I THINK they’re new) really showing up this week. Buffalo Solar put up a hell of a fight against the Stunts, and if anyone is going to beat a gender team here, it’s going to be them.


This Week’s Games:


Buffalo Solar Solutions vs Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers (+10) – Uncle Rico’s just isn’t right. I’m really hoping they can get it together a bit here, because quite frankly they’re awesome people who I’m rooting for. Buffalo Solar is chugging along so far this season, but this is a game they really can’t lose. BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS BY 7


Full Throttle vs Cunning Stunts (+13) -  Full Throttle gets a crack at the other gender team this week. Let’s see if they’ve learned anything from last week. I don’t have much to say about the Queens here. They’re just good man. CUNNING STUNTS BY 14


Matty’s Angels vs Mountain Dew Me (+15) – I’m REALLY hoping that the MDM offensive display was legit last week. I’d love to see them get the upset here. Pro Tip: bring as many girls as you can and consistently get gender touchdowns to keep up. Other tip: find your FASTEST person and have them chase Matty around at QB. Good luck friends. MATTY’S ANGELS BY 14




Last Week’s Games:

Hung Buffalo 40, Hope N Ruin 30

Cobblestone 36, Come From Behind 12

Over Compensators 50, Pink Pteratacos 0

En Fuego 34, Practice Squad 16

En Fuego 33, Pink Pteratacos 6


This division is all about En Fuego and the Over Compensators right now. While Practice Squad may be nipping at their heels a little bit, they have a little bit of growing to do. Both teams smacked around the Pink Pteratacos, who are struggling mightly this season. Cobblestone didn’t have Darryl, so they didn’t have problems. Instead they put down a Come From Behind team that isn’t really coming from behind this season, they’re just staying behind. Hung Buffalo pulled out a nice win against an evenly matched Hope N Ruin team as well.


This Week’s Games:


Hung Buffalo vs Pink Pteratacos (+10) – The Pteratacos are having a disastrous season and it doesn’t look to be getting any better anytime soon. Hung Buffalo is the team that the PP needs to beat to show it can compete in D5, and quite frankly I don’t think that’s going to happen this season. HUNG BUFFALO BY 7


Practice Squad vs Hope N Ruin (+6) – I think it’s fair to consider Practice Squad the favorites against the long time D5 contenders that Hope N Ruin are. PS has worked themselves to a 3-1 record, with the only blemish being a loss to En Fuego. HNR is still working out the kinks a little bit, but they’re NEVER a team you should sleep on. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 3


Over Compensators vs Come From Behind (+14) – Come From Behind is having the season they never really hoped for so far, as they’re 0-3 and struggling to score. The OC, however, is the complete opposite. They’ve REALLY found their groove and they have the best QB in the division with Larry Chruscial slinging it. CFB’s best chance in this game is if the OC is looking ahead to their 2:00 game. They won’t be. OVER COMPENSATORS BY 17


Over Compensators vs En Fuego (EVEN) – Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you your D5 MAIN EVENT the this week, and maybe for the season. These two teams do not like each other. There’s a bucket of beers bet on the game. Both have talked equal amounts of smack. This is the time for them to back it up. First place in the division is on the line as two of the TSL’s HOTTEST teams go head to head. Who’s going to win this one? Well. It’s really hard to tell. But since it’s my job to pick a winner: OVER COMPENSATORS BY 1




Last Week’s Games:

Wild Oak Beard Co 40, Blitzkrieg 26

pAssless Chaps 27, Shattered Dreams 18

The Bi-Polar Express 54, Tater Tots 28

TMA 41, The Replacements 18

Zack Attack 41, Graves Bros 24


Another week, another bunch of new teams figuring things out. And another week of writers/podcasters figuring them out as well. The Bi-Polar Express sits atop of the standings at 3-0, and they’re the only undefeated team left in D6. I’m sure that just jinxed them, but BPX really is giving off the vibe that they’re growing together as a team, and reports are that the girls are just having more fun. They walked all over the Tater Tots this last week, even with Gordon out of town. Zack Attack defeated Graves Bros in a pretty big game for both teams. The Attack is 3-1 (technically tied with BPX for first, but they lost a game so we won’t count it) and they can score in bunches. Graves Bros suffered their first loss of the season to them, but it’s clear that it won’t be considered a “bad” loss by any means. The pAssless Chaps still have hope to make the title game this season, but with Coach Jay having spotty attendance due to solving World Hunger or whatever it is he does, it’ll be interesting to see how the Chaps play without him. They won this time around against a Shattered Dreams team that just seems to be missing some direction, or perhaps they’re just one more good male player away from really making some noise. Either way, they’ve improved since their first week AND they’re staying at the bar longer, so that alone deserves a thumbs up. Wild Oak Beard Co is still a really fun name, and they got their first win of the season this week. Things seem to finally be clicking for them as they took down a Blitzkrieg team that looks pretty good themselves. Both sit at 1-2 currently, but with a bit more reps under their belts, look out for these dark horses. And finally, The Replacements seem like they might not be the best, but I’ve heard reports that they hang out at the bar as well, and that’s something. TMA, however, is finally living up to all of the promise they’ve shown for the last few seasons. It seems their QB may be the best one in the division, and they’re firing on all cylinders.


This Week’s Games:


TMA vs Blitzkrieg (+10) – Blitzkrieg is a team that is still forging an identity in the TSL. They should bring all the horses this week and try to capture a signature win against TMA. TMA, on the other hand, has to be considered one of the biggest contenders for the title. I know we say that every single season, but getting QB Ryan out there to throw to Ferger, Webber, Rob, and the 4 fantastic girls has been everything they ever wanted. Yeah, they still have to deal with Prim getting burned on defense, but nothing’s perfect in this life. TMA BY 14


Wild Oak Beard Co vs Tater Tots (+3) – As of this moment, I’m going to ride the hotter team here. WOBCO had a pretty damn good Week 3 on the field and they’re looking to carry over the momentum this week. The Tots may not have killed it on the field last week, but the killed it at the bar. Multiple reports had them having a blast and making everyone smile with their antics. Someday, maybe, they’ll match it up on the field. WILD OAK BEARD CO BY 7


The Bi-Polar Express vs Graves Bros (+6) – This will be the biggest test of the season for Gordon and the girls as BPX looks to extend their winning streak to 4. This should be a close game, as both teams have been playing pretty good defense. The only real question is going to be if the Bros can figure out how to keep up with BPX’s offense. (Hint: They won’t) THE BI-POLAR EXPRESS BY 12


pAssless Chaps vs The Replacements (+8) – The Replacements aren’t that inspiring just yet in this young season, and its not unheard of for a team to turn it around in the second half of the season before playoffs. The Chaps, as I said before, are looking to keep the good vibes flowing. Coach Jay has gotten them into a hell of a rhythm, but they’re humble enough to never overlook their competition. PASSLESS CHAPS BY 10

Graves Bros vs The Replacements (+8) – If the Replacements want to save their season, they need to win of the their two games this weekend. Which is fun to say after I just said anything can happen in the second half of the season. Graves Bros go from a game against BPX that’s a game they’d like to win to a game they HAVE to win. I think GB is a strong D6 title dark horse, but losing games against teams you should beat is a quick way to fall down the standings. GRAVES BROS BY 6


Zack Attack vs Blitzkrieg (+10) – Blitzkrieg’s second game of the day gives them the high scoring Zack Attack who could be looking at taking sole possession of first place in the division by day’s end. I’m not incredibly sure that anyone on BK will be able to stop Elphick and his merry men (and women). ZACK ATTACK BY 12




1.      Will it or won’t it? The forecast is looking like it’ll be rainy in the morning, and windy the whole time. Prepare accordingly. This fall weather is great for pumpkin spice and football, sure, but it also sucks to play in sometimes.


2.      Will DJ Jimmy come back? We got one little taste of the way football used to be, with music jamming all day. Despite promises that he’d be back again, DJ Jimmy still hasn’t come back home after just leaving us to “grab a pack of cigarettes”.



3.      Did Topper plan this ‘Rivalry Week’? There’s a TON of awesome rivalry games going on all day long: Public Enemy vs Eyes Downtown, Over Compensators vs En Fuego, Bullet Club vs A&A, Topper vs Gary, etc that it feels like it was almost planned.


4.      Who to watch at 2:00? If you’re not reffing or playing at 2:00pm EST and you’re at the fields, good luck picking a game to watch. Look at this slate: Public Enemy vs Eyes Downtown, Over Compensators vs En Fuego (Which should NOT be on Field 5), No Punt Intended vs Frodo Swaggins for the title of best Non Quinn team, The offensive magic of Matty’s Angels taking on the newbies you want to see in Mountain Dew Me, and a classic D3 matchup of Sticky Bandits vs Ultimate Warriors. Good games all around!!


5.      Who wants to be on Titos with Travis? On the TSL podcast this week, Travis Cleavenger gave us his great idea to walk around the fields and have a drink with a new player in the league, asking them about things and getting to know them. They’d be like short little videos that could introduce us to new people in the league and I for one, love it. Go sign up today!





1.      Let’s give a shout out to the referees. After hearing about how the refs were subpar for a week, they really took it to heart and word is that they were awesome this last week. Great job guys, and thank you for all you do for the league.


2.      It’s really good to see that the bar’s specials are really making people happy. More than a few people have emailed me to express how something as simple as 10 wings for $8.95 and an extra beer in a bucket just make them feel appreciated. That’s all we ever wanted from the bar it seems.



3.      I’ll warn you now before Rameer gets to you, but Topper isn’t going to be here after his games this week and it seems he won’t be there next week either. I don’t care if it’s a full moon or anything. Just don’t try to pull some crap. If something goes wrong find your nearest friendly Val Bernal, Joe K, or Rameer and it’ll get handled swiftly. They may even be wearing name tags just so you know.


4.      Here’s the best watching schedule this week:


a.      10:00: Bullet Club vs A&A – Field 2

b.      11:00: Peachy Platoon vs Energy Buff – Field 2

c.       12:00: Marketing Mayors vs Public Enemy – Field 1

d.      1:00: No Punt Intended vs Jabronies – Field 2

e.      2:00: Literally any of them.

f.        3:00: Tight Ends in Motion vs Gryffindor – Field 1


5.      Thank you to the few volunteers that have already inquired about joining the Banquet Committee! If you’d like to be a part of that, let me know at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .


6.      Speaking of Committees, the TSL Awards are slowly starting to be discussed behind the scenes. If you have a player on your team that deserves recognition for D1-D6 Male or Female MVP, OR QB of the Year for each division let us know! You can email me again at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .



7.      Team Topper wants everyone to comment on how they’ve only allowed 22 points so far this season. But like, they played nobody great. They beat a We Back team that should be in D8, a “Joe-K-Has-To-QB” Bullet Club, and Energy Buff, who is literally ranked 47 of 47 on the website. Maybe they should play someone their own size first.


8.      Shout outs to all of the great articles that are being written on Toppersports.com lately. The Sentinel, The Rant, and The QB Power Rankings are just killing it. And to top it off, it’s great hearing the TSL Podcast each week again too. Just lots of great content out there from the team here at the Topper Sports League.



9.      If you didn’t know, you should be liking us on Facebook at Topper Sports LLC, following us on Twitter @toppersportsllc , and pretty soon it seems there will be an Instagram too. And don’t forget, download the Telegram App today. It’s the fastest way for the league to provide you with cancellations and important league information!


10.   B’S BROTHER IS ALIVE AND WELL. HE WAS REPPIN’ THE MAYHEM JERSEY BEFORE HE WENT HOME TO GRIND ON NBA2K20! We all were so lucky to have him stop by, I hope he comes back again soon so the newest members of our TSL Family can finally meet him!



And with that, Week 4 is upon us. Good luck to the teams out there and have a great time, rain or shine. And remember, I’ll be deciding on YOUR Ranking while watching from the cut.

Week 2 Thoughts Picks and Predictions

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 30 August 2019 12:42
Published: Friday, 30 August 2019 12:42
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 2512


Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe:


We’re off! The Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality is officially started and I, for one, couldn’t be more excited. There’s nothing better then watching the best of the best Co-ed football teams square off against one another. Every season is like its own movie. There’s twists and turns. The plot gets some unexpected heroes, some expected villians, and there’s always that M. Night Shamalyan “HOLY CRAP” moment at the end that really gets you when you THOUGHT you knew how things were going to go.


This is why we come out, season after season, to see how each story is going to unfold. It’s on me to be your narrator, to guide you through a whole bunch of silly nonsense and help you along the way. If you’ve ever paid attention, you should know that I already know everything, and with that, I’ll be able to tell you exactly what’s going to happen this season. So here you go:




The Contenders: Marketing Mayors, Public Enemy


The Next Best: Eyes Downtown, Tight Ends In Motion


Gryffindor: Gryffindor


Last Week’s Scores

Marketing Mayors 42, Eyes Downtown 16

Public Enemy 33, Gryffindor 13

Tight Ends In Motion 35, Gryffindor 0

Marketing Mayors 39, Energy Buff 19 (D1/D2 Crossover Game)


Joey Batts gets all of the credit in the world for finally going back to D1 with a Gryffindor team that, 4 years ago, was in D4. Unfortunately, his return didn’t go as well as he had planned. A 20 point loss to Public Enemy and a beat down by TEIM isn’t the best start, but it’s a young season so he’ll have time to figure things out. At least he went up to “The Show”, which is more than we can say for some teams. (Hi Matty!) As for the rest of the division, something feels off with Eyes Downtown. I felt it last season too. I just have this feeling there’s some inner turmoil and I’m not sure if its Bobby related or not. It’ll be interesting to watch this division unfold, but I feel like we’re on the way to Marketing Mayors vs Public Enemy, which at this point might be what the people want anyway.


This Week’s Games:


Gryffindor (+17) vs Public Enemy - The downside to us only having 5 D1 teams is that you get to play each other a lot. Hopefully Gryffindor can put up a better fight and show us that they’ve learned something from last week. PUBLIC ENEMY BY 15


Tight Ends In Motion (+8) vs Eyes Downtown – Just because I’m feeling like the internal downfall of Eyes Downtown might be on the horizon, doesn’t mean that they’re a bad team. They still know how to play, and while I expect TEIM to be a much better team this season (as is usually the case when a team settles on one QB instead of three), there’s still a matter having to see them prove it on the field. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 6




The Contenders: Peachy Platoon, A&A, HOFBRAHAUS BUFFALO (this is Topper’s team)


The Next Level: Dilf’s, Slytherin That End Zone


It’s a Good Thing Everyone Makes Playoffs:  Bullet Club, Energy Buff, We Back


Last Week’s Scores:

Dilf’s 27, Energy Buff 18

Peachy Platoon 61, Bullet Club 20

Slytherin That End Zone 32, Bullet Club 26


Peachy Platoon 43, SITE 30


The offseason for D2 became quite the arms race. A&A added Jay German as they were expecting to go to D1 before Matty pulled a “Joey Batts” and got scared and stayed down longer. (To be fair, once they won D2, Joey HAD to go up after many seasons of hiding). Team Topper prepared for this a season ahead of time, went to D1, signed Pete, and then snuck back down to D2 with a name change. There’s ZERO way Lenny would’ve let Topper take Pete to D2 by the way. This lawless land with no Topper restrictions is a scary place now. Peachy Platoon, who was moved up to D2 early on in the offseason, added Dave Wilbern and his sidekick, Mo Saleh. Energy Buff went out and added Coach Jay! The Dilf’s weren’t really a team, but they’re basically a form of #XTC (RIP) with Val Bernal, Travis, and Katie Keller added to the squad. Bullet Club’s response to all of this? Lose Paul Nieman and Travis to free agency, and Sarah Donogher for a season due to pregnancy (congrats!). Just kidding, they added Ricky Austin at QB and in a sneaky good move added Chris Nelson to the team as well. I have no idea how all of this is going to play out, but currently it doesn’t feel like anyone can stop Peachy. They’re just so fast. Bullet Club didn’t stand a chance when they were (not surprisingly) missing people. Slytherin gave Peachy a much better game however. The Dilf’s used their combined 4,023 years of experience to give them the edge over Energy Buff. Topper absolutely SHREDDED We Back, who might have picked the wrong division to start “back” in.


This Week’s Games:

We Back (+7) vs Bullet Club – It’s Week 2, and already we see our first “must win” game of the season. Granted, all of these D2 teams will make the playoffs, but considering just how poorly both teams looked last week, they need the good vibes. It’s been said that both teams were missing players so hopefully Joe K and Sal can get their rosters to actually show up to the fields this week. But based on what I’m seeing and hearing, I can only go this route: BULLET CLUB BY 4


Energy Buff (+10) vs HOFBRAUHAUS BUFFALO  - I’m already sick of typing that name. And why is Topper putting his own team’s name in all capital letters? Is it to make it easier to see on the schedule? It’s those types of tricky veteran moves that keeps that man alive in this league. Team Topper might have had a rough go in D1 last season, but they’ve learned a LOT in that division. They’re going to keep applying what they learned in a competitive D2 this season for sure. Energy Buff is a team that always plays hard, and I know they have a few reinforcements coming this week as well. The thing that matters the most is this: DON’T LET BOTH TEAMS BRING ONLY GRAY. HOFBRUHAUS BUFFALO BY 12


A&A (+3) vs Peachy Platoon – This is purely a line driven out of respect for Peachy’s Week 1. A&A didn’t play since Matty was off jet setting around the country as he does. That may mean there’s a bit of rust for them to shake off, since the roster is a bit different from last season. PEACHY PLATOON BY 10


Dilf’s vs Slytherin That End Zone (EVEN) – I wasn’t sure what to put this game at. Last week, Slytherin looked very good. The Dilf’s weren’t looking too bad either, cruising to their win (WITH JOHNNY F’N DIO!). I just think SITE is a bit more locked in right now, and Newman really looks to climb up the QB Rankings this season. SLYTHERIN THAT END ZONE BY 3


Energy Buff (+10) vs A&A – I have a feeling A&A might “wake up” when they have to go against Peachy earlier in the day, and I don’t think that will be a good thing for Energy Buff. I just see A&A doing everything they can to score 50 points this game and walk away with a win. A&A BY 10


There’s actually two D1/D2 Crossover games this week as well:


Gryffindor vs Dilf’s (EVEN) – I have no reason to give Gryffindor any credit after last week’s melt down. The Dilf’s have a team full of players that have played in D1 before and as a result, these teams are a lot more even that it seems. DILF’S BY 3


Bullet Club (+14) vs Eyes Downtown – If Bullet Club trots out the same roster as last week, Bobby should eat them apart. If they trot out the roster they claim to have, Bobby might eat them apart. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 12




The Contenders: All We Do Is Quinn, Frodo Swaggins


The Next Level: Sticky Bandits, No Punt Intended, Vaspian, Jabronies


That Interesting Level That I Can’t Really Figure Out How It’ll Go In This Season: Puckett All-Stars, End Game, Ultimate Warriors


The Honeymoon Is Over Maybe: 3rd And Schlong


Last Week’s Games:

Ultimate Warriors 49, Jabronies 49

Frodo Swaggins 30, Puckett All-Stars 20

All We Do Is Quinn 45, End Game 36

Vaspian 43, 3rd And Schlong 37

All We Do Is Quinn 55, 3rd And Schlong 31

Sticky Bandits 25, End Game 8


To be clear, I HATE putting 3AS at the bottom of the rankings here, but lets face it: They haven’t been good for a while now and something’s missing. I don’t know if they’re in need of another good player, or if Katie’s googly eyes at certain handsome Dilf’s have distracted her from remembering how to properly defend the field with her FAMILY. AWDIQ is chock full of bitterness with their “WHAT ABOUT ME? WHAT ABOUT RAVEN?” attitude because the powers that be moved up Peachy Platoon and ignored them completely. Quinn was good last season, but with a chip on their shoulder? Look out D3. Frodo Swaggins has a fantastic QB in Scotty Drosendahl (word is he’s cool as hell too), and as long as Garrett doesn’t ruin thing with calling his own number too much (He got old, it happens), this Swaggins squad is top notch. Sticky Bandits can never be counted out, and while Alex has a broken hand of some sorts (He’s always injured now it seems), Rags has come back from injury to throw the ball for the team. Or is it Mike Thomas now? Perhaps with things like weddings, injuries, medical school, and other nonsense out of the way, they can get back to doing what they do best: winning football games. No Punt Intended added Glenn and Chelsie Bird and Rachel Parker from the defunct GLBS squad, which may have been exactly what was needed for them to be true contenders instead of the up and down team we’ve seen the past few seasons. Vaspian, I think, isn’t a completely new team, but I didn’t do my proper homework on them. I’ve heard that they’re going to be a solid team, and I look forward to hearing more about them. The Jabronies have made a Quinn/Peachy leap directly into D3. Why? The addition of a few Klecklers. Joe Miano has made strides as a QB since he started to throw the ball, and that shouldn’t go unnoticed. The Ultimate Warriors have awesome new jerseys, and they have Sam slinging the ball the way she always should. The more notable acquisition here, however, is QB Scott Pinto, who played last season with the now defunct Money Ball. The Warriors were on the wrong end of too many close games last session, but getting set at QB is going to be HUGE for them. Puckett All-Stars deserves all of the credit in the world. They were a low seed in last year’s D4 playoffs after a rough season, and won it all. Instead of hiding back in D4, they went right up to D3, like a champion should. End Game deserves some credit here too. Despite losing the title game last season, they still went up (they were probably going to be made to regardless) and they never once complained. Both of these teams have already faced the ‘top tier’ and gave them both good games this season, so they look right at home.  


This Week’s Games:


Puckett All-Stars (+8) vs Jabronies – This game is going to be a heck of a game. Right now, the only reason I’m giving the Jabronies a bit more credit is because of what their roster looks like. How they end up using those players is a different thing altogether. While I wouldn’t sleep on the reigning D4 champs, I’m still going with my gut here. JABRONIES BY 7


Ultimate Warriors vs End Game (EVEN) – Both teams had good showings last week. I know that End Game went 0-2, but they kept it close with Quinn, and then to have to play a fresh Sticky Bandits right after wasn’t fair. The Warriors need to keep doing what they’ve done for a while now, and play smart. They know better than anyone the gender TD game, and if they keep their cool, they should be looking at a 1-0-1 record to start this season off. ULTIMATE WARRIORS BY 10


Puckett All-Stars (+10) vs All We Do Is Quinn – Quinn is HOT. I know they are. They should be on a mission to prove to everyone that they’re not Peachy’s little brother. They boast fantastic players like Rawdog and Cat (Kat?) Peters, and their mission is fixing last season’s D3 championship loss. Puckett is good, but Quinn is on another level. AWDIQ BY 15


Vaspian vs No Punt Intended (EVEN) – It’s hard for me to really make a line on a game when I don’t full know how both rosters are going to look this season. This game will really tell me how things are going to go for both teams this season. Can one of these squads look to make a leap into the D3 title picture? NO PUNT INTENDED BY 3


All We Do Is Quinn vs Sticky Bandits (+3) – I really hope that I’m not doing what I did last season, where I’m giving Sticky a bit too much respect. I still think they’re a great team and they have one of the game’s most brilliant football minds in Jeff Krol (Dave Baker is no slouch either). Can Sticky figure out how to properly slow down Quinn? I’m not so sure. AWDIQ BY 6


No Punt Intended vs 3rd and Schlong (+3) – I really hope the injury to 40 Year Plan Guy isn’t significant. He was seen limping around the bar last week, and may have been a big reason things didn’t go so well for 3AS last week. Perhaps it’s time for 3AS to find a third girl? Nicole and Katie are great, for sure, but being able to add that third girl near the end zone could do wonders for them. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 3


Vaspian (+7) vs Frodo Swaggins – Scotty Too Hotty is looking ready to sling it and is a dark horse D3 MVP candidate this season. If Frodo struggles anywhere, it’s with consistency. Sometimes they look like world beaters, other times they look like D4 might have been a better option. It usually more of the former than the latter, but if they can figure out a way to stay consistent, they pose a big threat to Quinn. Vaspian needs to come ready to fight this game. A win here really puts them on the map, and perhaps I can learn someone’s name from this team (Save for Vaspian, I guess, which is the Captain’s last name). FRODO SWAGGINS BY 13




The Contenders:  Matty’s Angels, Cunning Stunts


The Next Level:  Uncle Rico’s Time Travelers, Buffalo Solar Solutions


Keep On Truckin’: Mountain Dew Me, Full Throttle


Last Week’s Game:

Full Throttle 28, Mountain Dew Me 14


There just isn’t a TON to say about D4. They’re in this weird awkward stage where the best teams went up to D3, or folded. Now Full Throttle, Buffalo Solar, and Uncle Rico’s are looking around going “What?”. What was a strong 10 team division has become a weird six team division this time around. Mountain Dew Me joins the ranks, and while I don’t know much about them, I know they lost to Full Throttle, who was the 9th best team in D4 last season. That may not bode well. On top of it all, those beautiful buzzsaws that are BOTH gender teams in Cunning Stunts and Matty’s Angels moved up to D4 to continue their constant rivalry. I haven’t heard much from who left/joined those teams either. I don’t have a good feel on this division because of it, but it looks like we’re going to see how the non-gender teams deal with the gender teams. Good luck out there.


This Week’s Games:


Full Throttle (+10) vs Buffalo Solar Solutions – Buffalo Solar had a pretty good year last season. They started out hot, lost it a bit in the middle of the season, but got things together and ended up losing the championship game to Puckett. Full Throttle had a nice start, but I’m going to continue to base things off of last season here. BUFFALO SOLAR SOLUTIONS BY 14


Uncle Rico’s Time Traveler’s (+13) vs Matty’s Angels – I apologize to Jon Senn now, but “the show” is coming into town. Don’t be disrespected by the 13 point spread, but quite frankly the Angels are hopping mad after last season’s disappointing loss to the Stunts in the session’s final game. Matty has gotten over his heatstroke, and the girls are ready to avenge that loss. This is a hell of a litmus test for Uncle Rico’s right out of the gate, but if they can hang, they’ll know they can take this D4 title. MATTY’S ANGELS BY 13


Mountain Dew Me (+17) vs Cunning Stunts -  No offense to our new team, but the Queens are here, and this will be their first appearance since winning the D5 title a few months ago. I’m positive that they want to put on a clinic right away to remind everyone just who the dominant ladies’ team is. CUNNING STUNTS BY 14




The Contenders: En Fuego, Practice Squad


The Next Level: Hung Buffalo, Over Compensators, Hope N Ruin, Pink Pteratacos


D6 isn’t THAT bad: Cobblestone, Come From Behind


Last Week’s Games:

Over Compensators 59, Hope N Ruin 35

Over Compensators 36, Cobblestone 20

En Fuego 43, Come From Behind 14

Practice Squad 35, Pink Pteratacos 18


First off, THANK YOU BLASÉ LADUCA. It hurts to say that, but he was smart enough to realize how stupid being called the “Ugandan Warriors” was when we had the “Ultimate Warriors” already in the league. He did us all a solid and changed his name. Now, I get to mess with him. Because let’s face it Blasé, you guys walked through this division last season, as long as there were more than one male on the field. The only thing you had left to prove in D5 was that you could beat one of the gender teams, and you couldn’t. So while BOTH of them moved up to a SIX team D4, you’re still hiding in D5? WHY? You want to bark at the QB Rankings team about how you should be so much higher, yet you’re running from your competition? Interesting. With that said, En Fuego is good, and this is their division to lose. Some people may think I have Practice Squad a little too high here, but the D6 champs have a great blend of talent and skill. Renee will always have her team ready to go. Hung Buffalo is always a tough out, and I didn’t hear about them playing last week, so we’ll have to see if they added any new wrinkles to the team. The Over Compensators are my dark horse in this division. After starting last season out really rough, they started to catch fire! They were one of the league’s hottest teams down the stretch last season, and it seems that they’re already building on that! I don’t mean to rain on Cobblestone’s parade so much. They’re AWESOME people, and they DO have the living legend in Darryl Carr QB Superstar. The problem for them has be that maybe, just mayyyyybe Darryl *might* not be as Superstary as he has been in the past. Hope N Ruin is another solid team that, from what I know, is the same group of people that always makes a run at this title and can never be counted out. Come From Behind is always a ton of fun, but it seems they’ve been winning more than losing as of late. Finally, the Pink Pteratacos are a good team when they have everyone on the same page and have a winning attitude. The problem is that Mark and Joe tend to argue like, well, father and son, and it derails the team way too much. Do they still have the #55 girl? She was a monster last season. Mark never emailed me to give her the proper respect so I could know her name. I blame him.


This Week’s Games:


Hope N Ruin (+10) vs En Fuego – Until someone stops En Fuego, they may be double digit point favorites every step of the way. This is a very good test for Hope N Ruin to see how they’re going to be this season. EN FUEGO BY 13


Come From Behind (+7) vs Practice Squad – I just got done talking up Practice Squad a bit, but you know what this game reminds me of? It’s like in Mike Tyson’s Punch Out where you had to work your way up the ladder in your new circuit. Come From Behind isn’t “Glass Joe” (Cobblestone), but they’re a very solid Piston Honda, and if PS blinks, it’ll be lights out. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 1


Hung Buffalo (+3) vs Over Compensators – The OC is becoming one of my favorite teams and I don’t have a really great answer to why. But who cares? I say this EVERY TIME I talk about Hung Buffalo but they’re a very good team that knows how to win games. Sometimes, knowing how to do something and actually doing it are two different things though. Assuming HB doesn’t have an ace up their sleeve, I like the OC here. OVERCOMPENSATORS BY 7


Hung Buffalo (+7) vs Practice Squad - Okay, if Come From Behind is Piston Honda, then Hung Buffalo is Bald Bull. They’re going to give you hell if you let them. Another interesting matchup that will really tell us if PS can hang in D5 or not. The difference here may be that PS will have two hours off to rest while HB is playing two in a row. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 3




The Contenders: The Bi-Polar Express, TMA, pAssless Chaps


The Rest:  Seriously, everyone else.


Last Week’s Games:

Zack Attack 34, Wild Oak Beard Co 15

The Bi-Polar Express 36, Blitzkrieg 33

Graves Bros 35, TMA 8


I’m pretty confident in saying that 7 of the 10 teams in D6 are some sort of brand new team. It appears that The Replacements are run by Payton Spinelli of “Cellino Sewer Rats/Five Star Generals” fame, so perhaps that’s who they are under a new name? No idea who Wild Oak Beard Co is but they already sound awesome! I imagine all of them have sweet beards. Blitzkrieg deserves some credit, having your first game against a gender team is never easy, and they really hung in there. Bi-Polar Express is really coming along, and with a good chunk of the teams that gave them fits leaving the division, there’s nowhere to go but up. Add into the fact that Gordon added Cat Peters, who is a legit star, and the BPX roster looks better than ever. Their main question remains at QB, but he’s the first to tell you that. TMA shouldn’t fool you. I know that Week 1’s loss made it seem like things weren’t going to be good again, but the rumor is that TMA has a QB now! Reports indicate that he played very well at the wine tourney, AND they added Steph Czaja to the roster to really shore up the girls. TMA can trot out 4 amazing girls at any time, and if they figure out which ones to use and when? Look out. pAssless Chaps are back (after rumors that they were going to fold) and that means Coach Jay is ready to take them to the next step. They really got things together en route to the title game last season and they have to be considered among the favorites. Tater Tots are a new team that are run by Dave Marcus, who’s better known around the league (for now) as “Drunk Meg’s Boyfriend with the cool beard.” Shattered Dreams are bunch of fun loving dudes that apparently used to play on Sweet and Sour Inc. back in the day with Joe K and Gordon (per Topper). Joe K says they’re pretty awesome when I asked for some info, and he claimed he can “get them to have fun at the bar except for the curly headed one.” Graves Bros showed up to defeat TMA in their first game, so that’s a good sign there too. Last but not least, we have Zack Attack, who is run by Zack Elphick. Elphick was a star for GLBS last season, so there’s a decent chance he dominates the division. So far so good for the Attack, since they’re 1-0.


This Week’s Games:


The Replacements vs Blitzkrieg (+3) – I’m giving BK the points here only because if the Replacements are who I think they are, they’re a pretty good squad, where all I have to go on with Blitz is that they almost beat Bi-Polar. THE REPLACEMENTS BY 7


Zack Attack vs Tater Tots (+10) – The Tots get a shout out for showing up to the fields this week to practice even though their game was cancelled. It looks like they’re just starting out though, and in this case, I’m not sure they’ll figure out just how to stop Elphick. ZACK ATTACK BY 13


Wild Oak Beard Co (+6) vs The Bi-Polar Express – Let’s see how this new team fares against a gender squad. Like I said, Gordon and the Girls have been getting better with each session, and with a full team they should be able to keep the good time rolling. THE BI-POLAR EXPRESS BY 8


Shattered Dreams (+10) vs Zack Attack – I’m going with Zack Attack again mainly because I know who one person on that team is, and I’m not sure who any of the people are on Shattered Dreams just yet. ZACK ATTACK BY 7


Shattered Dreams (+10) vs TMA – The back end of a double header for Shattered Dreams brings them to TMA. Word is that the TMA QB will be there this week, and we’ll get to see how the division is going to unpack for them when he’s there. TMA BY 7


pAssless Chaps vs Graves Bros (EVEN) – I know that the Chaps were very good at the end of the last season, but Graves Bros looks REALLY good in their win over TMA last week. Since the Chaps (and Coach Jay) may need to shake off some rust, I feel this game may be very close. PASSLESS CHAPS BY 1




1.      Who will emerge as the standout NEW team to the TSL? There’s a lot of new names and faces around the league, and when that happens we get a LOT of new TSL stars out of it. Get out there and make some friends! Put the Social back in Social Co-Ed Football!


2.      Why are A&A and Team Topper in D2 again? Both of those teams should be in D1. This “We’re sick of D1” thing is getting a little annoying. Get up there and perform. We should have 8 teams up there next session. A&A, Team Topper, and Peachy Platoon. (No Joey Batts, you’re staying.)


3.      How soon can we get these rivalry games going at 3:00? I think the interdivision games that would see Peachy Platoon take on All We Do Is Quinn, En Fuego taking on Matty’s Angels, and A&A taking on Public Enemy would be just fantastic.


4.      Do you want some publicity for your team? All you have to do is talk to me! Email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. . Seriously, give me a heads up on why YOU are going to win your division.


5.      What’s up with people in the league latching onto stars and demanding those two play together so they can get on better teams? I’m looking at the Rameer/Jay German and Mo/Dave Wilbern combos. Go start your own teams so you can’t get kicked off of it like we did in the old days.





1.      The podcast is back!! Joe K made good on his Spring session long promise and got us back in the podcast game. It’s not as polished as it used to be, but its awesome that it’s back. I got sick of people asking me about it.


2.      Shout out to my new favorite pen pal, Josh Thompson of Peachy Platoon. He sent me just an awesome email about his team before the season started, letting me know who they added and what they were thinking heading into the league. He’s a well-spoken, nice guy, and he’s somebody that should DEFINITELY be a face of this league. Peachy is the future of the TSL kids.



3.      Seriously, Mountain Dew Me, Tater Tots, Zack Attack, Shattered Dreams, Wild Oak Beard Company, Graves Bros, Vaspian, The Replacements, Blitzkrieg and whoever else I don’t really know, email me! Let’s get some conversations going. Rep your team!


4.      I’m glad someone finally said what needed to be said: Gray is the absolute WORST choice for a team color and it should be outlawed.





6.      Shout out to the TSLers that are banding together to be a part of the 24-team Leonard T. Alba III Memorial TSL Fantasy Football Championship. It sounds like it’ll be a really fun time, and its just another example of how this league has really become a family.



7.      Here are my official picks for this season’s champions: D1: Marketing Mayors, D2: Peachy Platoon, D3: Frodo Swaggins, D4: Matty’s Angels, D5: En Fuego, D6: The Bi-Polar Express.


8.      I received a message from a player in Game On! during the offseason. I don’t want to put them on blast at all, but they said they were growing tired of that league because apparently the “Wanderers just keep winning all of the time and it isn’t fun.”. Well, I’d like to cordially invite the Wanderers to come up to the Rose Garden if they’re looking for some different competition. Hell, we could have a scrimmage this session if we wanted, right?



9.      And on that note, I’d like to personally send my condolences to Game On! and the rest of the WNY Social Co-Ed football community. During the offseason, Len Synor passed away unexpectedly. I was lucky enough to know Len when I lived in Buffalo and he was truly an awesome guy. So sad to see a good one leave us so soon.


10.   The word is that the bar is actually going to have specials for us this season. Apparently, they’ll toss an extra Truly in when we buy a bucket, among other things. Eyewitness reports suggest that’s a pretty smart deal for this league. Will it happen? I’m not one to talk. But let’s hope so.



And with that, let’s get to Week 2. Welcome once again to all of our new teams. Download the telegram app to talk with your TSL friends. Follow us on Facebook. Follow us on Twitter. Email me. Be a guest on the podcast. GET INVOLVED. Its so much better for everyone when you do.

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